I told my parents I could not watch the marriage. I screamed, threw a fit and acted in a way ladies never would act. But what was I supposed to do? My love… My love was marrying someone else.
I do not know the name of his new wife. For if I did I would have her fief burnt down with all buildings surrounding it into ashes. Their water polluted and sources of food be brought to my land.
But I did not. And I shan't.
If I should stay
I would only be in your way
" NO! You - You cannot be! "
Eyebrows arched and heads turned. My outcry had been heard. What humiliation! I, the heir to the Dynasty, had just shrieked.
" You are betrothed to me! Me, Sepheti of Malkanea. ME! " I cried.
And why could I not? Love, I thought, was what I had with him. Surprisingly, not! Since now he was not betrothed to me.
" My lady, come take this outside. " He offered. " Matters talked over under moonlight make it easier. "
Such a soothing voice he has. And what a gentleman.
And tonight would be the last night he would be mine.
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you every step of the way
True as he said, the sky was a dark, beautiful velvet. Sapphires pins bejeweled everywhere. With the lake nearby it made it a lovers' night.
I withdrew my hand, calmly. If I could. I was just so mad! Furious!
Enraged with this problem. If things worsened I would surely die.
" My dear - " He began.
" Shut up, my lord. "
" Seph! "
" You have no right to address me so informally! You must - You must, " And I started crying. Damn, sentimentality.
" Seph, please. Please don't cry. Let me explain. "
I refused his embrace and stood away from him.
He turned his back to me and stared at his hands. " My mother, you know her. She just couldn't refuse this. This, was a proposal for me to marry the Lady Karen's daughter. I have heard that the Lady Kyne is beautiful and very intellectual but I was not tempted! My mother says that she is much richer than you so she made me… "
" She made you what? "
" Made me propose to Lady Kyne. Seph, please believe me! " He grabbed my hands and enclosed them in his own. " I didn't want to, love. I swear I didn't. "
Silence passed between us as he waited for my answer. And I still cannot believe it took me so long to say 4 words.
" I don't believe you. "
And I will always love you
I will always love you
Damn me. Why was I chosen to be a girl? Women act so childish. Cry when they break a nail or faint when something shocking happens. Damn women. Damn me.
Before him, I was not a girl. I was a 13 year old princess trying to act independent. I tried shutting all my friends out of my life. Suicide had once or twice been an option. When I tried to run away I was always caught.
Until he came. He came, riding upon his horse, beside my father as his squire. My knight in
shining armor. We became friends quite slowly, though.
He only fell for court ladies. Not tomboys. And my father always pressed him on matters of his studies. Or his family. Or his anything. I would be with my tutor, studying. Or mother would take me on rendezvous out in the country.
And then he proposed - I accepted.
And now where are we?
In hell.
(You you you, my darling you, mmm)
Bitter sweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
He stared at me. Seeing the girl that loved him, standing in front of his eyes.
" You must love me, Seph? Then why did you accept my proposal? "
Damn the proposal.
" Must you always bring it back to the proposal? " I muttered.
" Da - " He sighed. " That bloody proposal meant every damned thing to me. I gave my heart out to you. "
" So did I. "
He traced a pattern on my palm. " I have to know if you still love me. " He looked up, hopeful. " Do you? "
" I am not your love, my lord! You never loved me. So why should I love you in return? "
He was probably aghast from what I said. I could not see his face so I am only guessing.
" Why do you say this? " He asked, closing in on me. " Why do you say you do not love me when you know you do? When you know I do? "
So goodbye, please don't cry
I love him. But how? How can I love a man who is not going to marry me?
Because… Because things aren't meant to be? True love is something rare, people say.
Once you find it, you can get completely lost. It can pull you in like a hurricane.
And I don't like this one.
" Seph? TELL ME DO YOU LOVE ME! " He screamed. " I LOVE YOU! I WANT YOU! BUT DO YOU LOVE ME? " He thrashed.
" No! " I yelled back at him. At once, losing my feelings. I pushed him away from me. " I don't love you, anymore. I hate you! You are not what I need. Leave me alone. Goodbye! "
I ran away. Where was the bloody horse? I could also hear my name between sobbing. Then the crying reposed.
" I'm sorry! " I had yelled into the air. May I come back to you, I wanted to know. Would you cancel your marriage to her? Would you? Would you take me back?
" I am not what you need! " He roared. " You said so yourself! "
" I am sorry! I did not mean it. I did not mean it… "
" Come back, Sepheti! Come back to me. "
Had my ears heard right, that night? The tears were flowing so hard that I could not get up.
" You are what I need. You are who I want. " Echoed the darkness.
At that moment, I realized it. I was not who he wanted. What he needed. I was poison to him.
We both know I'm not what you need
July 25th
I am sure Lady Kyne will love you as much as I did you. I have promised myself that I shall never see you again. And that I will never accept an audience with you. Understand, for if I did I would want you back. And then facing the truth that you would not want me is hell. As it is now.
I love you so much, dear Knight. I will never forget you. But please forget me. It would be best.
Sincerely yours,
Sepheti
And I, will always love you
Will love you
I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you dreamed of
That was the last letter I sent him. He is reading it right now, I believe. But think me not mean, love, for sending it to you on your wedding day! You told me the news just yesterday. 1 day prior to the wedding.
I am wondering right now if you will still think of me even thought I forbade you to do it.
I will still think of you.
And I wish you joy and happiness
But above all this I wish you love
You always said you'd marry a rich girl! And Lady Kyne is her, isn't she? She will give you money and kisses and… I think you know what I mean.
But most of all, Knight…
I wish you love.
And I will always love you
You darling oh
Do you know where I stand love?
On a cliff. By the seaside. No… At the seaside. I can smell the mist of the ocean right from here.
And do you know what I'm going to do?
Fall.
I'll always, I'll always love you
And remember, love,
You and I, Faleron, will be together someday.
I do not know the name of his new wife. For if I did I would have her fief burnt down with all buildings surrounding it into ashes. Their water polluted and sources of food be brought to my land.
But I did not. And I shan't.
If I should stay
I would only be in your way
" NO! You - You cannot be! "
Eyebrows arched and heads turned. My outcry had been heard. What humiliation! I, the heir to the Dynasty, had just shrieked.
" You are betrothed to me! Me, Sepheti of Malkanea. ME! " I cried.
And why could I not? Love, I thought, was what I had with him. Surprisingly, not! Since now he was not betrothed to me.
" My lady, come take this outside. " He offered. " Matters talked over under moonlight make it easier. "
Such a soothing voice he has. And what a gentleman.
And tonight would be the last night he would be mine.
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you every step of the way
True as he said, the sky was a dark, beautiful velvet. Sapphires pins bejeweled everywhere. With the lake nearby it made it a lovers' night.
I withdrew my hand, calmly. If I could. I was just so mad! Furious!
Enraged with this problem. If things worsened I would surely die.
" My dear - " He began.
" Shut up, my lord. "
" Seph! "
" You have no right to address me so informally! You must - You must, " And I started crying. Damn, sentimentality.
" Seph, please. Please don't cry. Let me explain. "
I refused his embrace and stood away from him.
He turned his back to me and stared at his hands. " My mother, you know her. She just couldn't refuse this. This, was a proposal for me to marry the Lady Karen's daughter. I have heard that the Lady Kyne is beautiful and very intellectual but I was not tempted! My mother says that she is much richer than you so she made me… "
" She made you what? "
" Made me propose to Lady Kyne. Seph, please believe me! " He grabbed my hands and enclosed them in his own. " I didn't want to, love. I swear I didn't. "
Silence passed between us as he waited for my answer. And I still cannot believe it took me so long to say 4 words.
" I don't believe you. "
And I will always love you
I will always love you
Damn me. Why was I chosen to be a girl? Women act so childish. Cry when they break a nail or faint when something shocking happens. Damn women. Damn me.
Before him, I was not a girl. I was a 13 year old princess trying to act independent. I tried shutting all my friends out of my life. Suicide had once or twice been an option. When I tried to run away I was always caught.
Until he came. He came, riding upon his horse, beside my father as his squire. My knight in
shining armor. We became friends quite slowly, though.
He only fell for court ladies. Not tomboys. And my father always pressed him on matters of his studies. Or his family. Or his anything. I would be with my tutor, studying. Or mother would take me on rendezvous out in the country.
And then he proposed - I accepted.
And now where are we?
In hell.
(You you you, my darling you, mmm)
Bitter sweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
He stared at me. Seeing the girl that loved him, standing in front of his eyes.
" You must love me, Seph? Then why did you accept my proposal? "
Damn the proposal.
" Must you always bring it back to the proposal? " I muttered.
" Da - " He sighed. " That bloody proposal meant every damned thing to me. I gave my heart out to you. "
" So did I. "
He traced a pattern on my palm. " I have to know if you still love me. " He looked up, hopeful. " Do you? "
" I am not your love, my lord! You never loved me. So why should I love you in return? "
He was probably aghast from what I said. I could not see his face so I am only guessing.
" Why do you say this? " He asked, closing in on me. " Why do you say you do not love me when you know you do? When you know I do? "
So goodbye, please don't cry
I love him. But how? How can I love a man who is not going to marry me?
Because… Because things aren't meant to be? True love is something rare, people say.
Once you find it, you can get completely lost. It can pull you in like a hurricane.
And I don't like this one.
" Seph? TELL ME DO YOU LOVE ME! " He screamed. " I LOVE YOU! I WANT YOU! BUT DO YOU LOVE ME? " He thrashed.
" No! " I yelled back at him. At once, losing my feelings. I pushed him away from me. " I don't love you, anymore. I hate you! You are not what I need. Leave me alone. Goodbye! "
I ran away. Where was the bloody horse? I could also hear my name between sobbing. Then the crying reposed.
" I'm sorry! " I had yelled into the air. May I come back to you, I wanted to know. Would you cancel your marriage to her? Would you? Would you take me back?
" I am not what you need! " He roared. " You said so yourself! "
" I am sorry! I did not mean it. I did not mean it… "
" Come back, Sepheti! Come back to me. "
Had my ears heard right, that night? The tears were flowing so hard that I could not get up.
" You are what I need. You are who I want. " Echoed the darkness.
At that moment, I realized it. I was not who he wanted. What he needed. I was poison to him.
We both know I'm not what you need
July 25th
I am sure Lady Kyne will love you as much as I did you. I have promised myself that I shall never see you again. And that I will never accept an audience with you. Understand, for if I did I would want you back. And then facing the truth that you would not want me is hell. As it is now.
I love you so much, dear Knight. I will never forget you. But please forget me. It would be best.
Sincerely yours,
Sepheti
And I, will always love you
Will love you
I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you dreamed of
That was the last letter I sent him. He is reading it right now, I believe. But think me not mean, love, for sending it to you on your wedding day! You told me the news just yesterday. 1 day prior to the wedding.
I am wondering right now if you will still think of me even thought I forbade you to do it.
I will still think of you.
And I wish you joy and happiness
But above all this I wish you love
You always said you'd marry a rich girl! And Lady Kyne is her, isn't she? She will give you money and kisses and… I think you know what I mean.
But most of all, Knight…
I wish you love.
And I will always love you
You darling oh
Do you know where I stand love?
On a cliff. By the seaside. No… At the seaside. I can smell the mist of the ocean right from here.
And do you know what I'm going to do?
Fall.
I'll always, I'll always love you
And remember, love,
You and I, Faleron, will be together someday.
Note: The song is copyrighted to Dolly Parton because she wrote it. Another note there is another version of this romance. It's dedicated to my friend, Beth. Bye bye!