The beat meant her heart had a pulse.

The smoke meant her lungs could breathe.

The danger meant she could live.

The crowds meant she could be seen.

…

23:03

Dallas' house

First time

The room was dimly lit by a bedside lamp, the two faces unable to be seen.

The only evidence for any life was the two shadowy characters pounding to a rhythm, their silhouettes dancing on the dark yellow walls.

That and the moans.

His moans.

Their rhythms were synchronised, both parties moving in shared time. They moved together in a semi-heated motion, meeting at their cores with a pound each repetition.

They were complimentary.

But it just wasn't the right type of complimentary.

His body throbbing.

Her body aching.

His moans loud.

Her moans quiet.

His body wanting.

Her body wanted.

He was close.

She was very far from it.

He was ecstatic.

She was tolerant.

It wasn't ideal.

But then again this is what she was used to; sub-par standard. I mean she couldn't exactly blame him, it was their first time together and perhaps his first time ever, judging by his performance.

She wasn't expecting fireworks or anything.

She wasn't there for fulfilment.

And so she didn't get that.

His pace increased slightly, though his thrusts still quite limp and unexciting for her.

She could tell he was getting close by the pained expression on his face, almost comical.

She inwardly chuckled.

Of course, she felt kinda bad for the guy, he was obviously trying.

Unfortunately, it just wasn't doing it for her.

Just as she was about to completely ditch reality and try to imagine a more satisfying situation, he climaxed screaming louder than a lost soul.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!" He screamed as his hips jolted forward, exploding into the condom and holding his position over her for a few seconds.

She looked up at his face, the pained look having vanished, now just exhaustion evident in his features.

"Wow." He exhaled, rolling onto the bed beside her, panting. "That was... wow. That was amazing."

He brought his hand to his forehead, rubbing it back and forth. A faint sheen of sweat coated his body.

"Yeah." She replied, no tone to her voice. She looked straight up at the ceiling, her arms lying flat by her side over the duvet.

Inwardly she was smiling, chortling at his hyperbole of an assessment.

Outside, no emotion, no reaction. Nothing.

They lay there, him exhausted and her energised.

He turned to her, rolling onto his side, propping his head up with his right arm.

"I never thought you'd have sex with me, you know. I thought about it a lot." He paused, "The idea of fucking you." He half-whispered, bringing his arm up to hold her face and caressing her cheek.

Only then did she turn her face toward him.

Her eyes stared through him, donning a glacial look. They were slightly puffy and red, but they were darkened by the smoky eye-makeup that surrounded them meaning they didn't look abnormal.

"I'm glad we did it, babe." He smirked, leaning in to kiss her lips.

The kiss was rather one sided; him well into it, her less so.

That seemed to be the trend for the night.

When she pulled away she laid her hand on his chest, a quiet signal for him to stop. After a few seconds she leaned away, moving to sit up on the bed.

"I need to go." She said, with a dulcet tone.

She stood up and slung on a loose grey T-shirt that sagged over one shoulder, showing her black bra strap.

"Why?" He said, looking stunned and sharply rising on the bed.

She turned and saw his face, taking in his handsome features.

"Please don't go. We just - I mean we did stuff. You can't just go." He pleaded, shocked by her sudden desire to leave.

She looked at his brown swooping hair that hung just above his eyes, his defined cheek bones and jaw and his smooth tanned skin.

He was sad, that much was obvious, but he also looked hurt, like she'd just punched him in the stomach.

She looked at him, closely, honing in on his eyes. Normally when she looked into people's eyes she thought of them as mirrors, because she could normally concentrate hard enough to see her reflection. And she liked that, she liked the idea that she was only really seeing herself.

But when she looked at his eyes she couldn't see her reflection, they were too wet, and it meant she could see right into him.

That scared her.

She could see his hurt and his pain at the idea of her leaving and it was not a good sight. She didn't like knowing people's hurt, she didn't like getting past the mirror.

Because past the mirror was the person.

Past the mirror was hopes, dreams, fears, love, hate, interests, beliefs and all the other stuff that was too scary to delve into: Your first crush, your first kiss, what you wanted to be when you were younger, where you want to live, what's your favourite anything, how do you think of yourself and so on. You shatter the mirror, you shatter the buffer, and you close the distance.

And then you're in too deep.

She preferred the mirrors. She liked seeing her face in people's eyes, because it kept her focus away from other people and brought it back to her. She could be reminded that while there was another person there, she was the one she needed to focus on.

It was easier that way.

You stay afloat.

You don't drown.

"I have to, Dallas. I can't stay here." She said, turning around and looking at him after she dragged on her underwear and black skinny jeans. "Listen, thanks for the white."

"You can't just leave!" He shouted, exasperated. "Y-you can't." He was starting to look panicky and agitated.

He rose to his feet, pleading with her not to leave.

"Ally, please." He whispered, grabbing her hands with his. "I've imagined us fucking so many times and you always end up curled up in my arms as we fall asleep; it wouldn't be right any other way. You have to stay." He said as his hand went to cup her face.

Her eyes seemed to soften, as she leaned into his hand, finally showing some emotion.

"Oh Dallas." She said, holding his arm. "I know you want us to be some cheesy rom-com movie." She sighed. "I know you want me to kiss you in the rain and fall madly in love with you. And I know you want me to be the type of girl that has sex with a guy and falls asleep in his arms." She said, looking directly into his eyes as she pulled down his hand.

"But the fact of the matter is Dallas; I'm not." She exhaled. "I have sex and I leave. I never stay the night. That's the type of girl I am and I know that's not what you want." She said with kind eyes.

She left his immediate vicinity and grabbed her purse, slinging the strap around her shoulder.

And just as she swung the front door open she turned back to Dallas and whispered softly, "So Dallas."

"Yeah?" He replied, picking his head up, looking hopeful.

"Stop wanting me."

And just like that, she left.

...

23:52

Elliot's house

Fourth time

"Hey there, baby." The brunette said, opening the door to the petite girl.

He donned a smug smirk, as well as dark jeans, a navy polo shirt and a wornout puffy brown jacket over the top.

She looked the same as before, grey t-shirt slung loosely over one shoulder, skinny jeans, smokey eye-makeup and boots.

She was the only one who never seemed to see how beautiful she was.

Men would ogle her, always saying to each other how they wanted to 'screw her' and 'bang her' or 'make her cum'. They seemed to follow her wherever she'd go.

Some were nice and just say she was 'pretty' or 'beautiful'.

She liked those ones.

Shame none of them could take the heat.

The constant heat that followed her, like the tail-end of a matchstick.

And girls would always talk about her and say how they wanted to be her. Wish they could have her cheek bones, or her jawline and wish that men looked at them the way they do her. But they always wanted her eyes. Her big, beautiful, doe eyes. Envied by so many, yet always looking so sad.

And although she was always looking at herself, in any reflection, she was never looking at her appearance, never focusing on how she looked on the outside. She was always just wondering if people could see her like she could see other people.

Sometimes you look at others and can instantly tell what they're about, what they like and what they want, and well Ally could do that with everyone. If she could see it from face value it meant she didn't have to get any deeper and she liked that.

And so when she looked in the mirror she was always wondering if she was giving things away, if she was showing to much of herself and that it would mean someone might just figure her out, get in deep. And that scared her.

Since she was too busy worrying about that she never really had any time for focusing on how she looked, never thought she was pretty, never thought she was ugly, never focused on it and never really cared.

"Hey." She replied, a confident look on her face with a trace of a smile.

Suddenly she pounced, wrapping her arms around his head and crushing her lips to his.

He was caught off guard slightly but maintained his composure, returning the kiss and slamming the door behind her.

"Miss me?" She asked with a grin, only breaking the kiss for a second.

"Of course I did baby." He resumed the kiss, smiling into it.

Their hands were roaming each others bodies urgently, exploring every nook and cranny, every curve and crescent.

They were slowly staggering their way to the living room just right of the large hallway they were in.

"It's gon-na have... to be- quick baby. Real quick. My p-parents are home... in about 20 minutes." Elliot breathed in between kisses.

"Okay." She replied, tearing his jacket off and peeling off her T-shirt.

She threw him down onto the nearby sofa in the living room. It was brown leather and puffy, so it nicely cushioned the fall.

This house was much flashier than Dallas'. The living room had two red walls and two white walls, with a modern book case design running across one of them. There was a huge flat screen TV plastered to the wall, drawing most of the focus in the room. The two arm chairs neighbouring the sofa were also brown, but the rest of the furniture in the room was white: the cabinet under the TV, the skirting board, the book shelf and the frames of all the family photos slung on the walls. The two large windows either side of the TV had their curtains drawn, so as to not see the activities going on inside.

Said activities were getting even more heated.

She whipped off her underwear, leaving them both completely naked.

"Okay big boy, let's make this quick." She ordered as she kissed him and he slipped his condom on, slotting himself inside her.

…

"It's on the table on the way out." Elliot shouted from the living room, having redressed.

"Thanks. See you, Elliot." She shouted back from the hall way, on her way to leave again.

"Saturday, yeah? Cassidy's." He shouted, exhaustedly from the sofa.

"Cassidy's." She replied, grabbing the brown parcel on the table.

And she was gone again.

…

00:43

Gavin's house

Fifth time

"MMMhhmmm. That's it, girl. Yeah nice." The blonde-brunette breathed behind gritted teeth.

She was working her hand quickly up and down his shaft, making sure to apply the right amount of pressure at each point.

"Keep going, come on." He groaned, tilting his head back.

She was using up all the energy she could, pumping him, milking him, until...

"Fuuuuuckkkk!" He growled.

His load shot out into the bathroom sink.

She quickly washed her hands and dried them, turning back to Gavin.

"Someone was excited." She said, blankly, looking up at his face and meeting his eyes.

"Yeah, well you're just so fucking hot I can barely control myself around you." He said with a smirk, tucking his member back into his pants and doing up the fly.

She didn't react to his statement.

She heard that, or variations thereof, a lot from a lot of different guys. Not once had she ever responded to it. She would hear guys say it and not respond, simply because she didn't know how to. It didn't seem to have any meaning and how do you respond to a statement without meaning? It just never felt like they were talking to her. They were talking to her skin, her hair, her legs and all other parts of her body, but never to her.

But she was fine with that.

She didn't expect anymore than that.

She didn't want more than that.

"I need to go." She said, looking towards the bathroom door then back to him, a brief smile appearing on her face.

"Oh-kay?" He said puzzled, as if implying 'well what are you waiting for?' Normally she would simply go after they hooked up, no goodbye needed.

"The pills?" She asked, with a confident lean onto one leg as she crossed her arms, smirking slightly.

"Oh, right yeah. In my room, second door on your left." He replied, rubbing his forehead..

"Thanks." She replied, putting on her bag and closing the door behind her.

…

00:56

Dawson House

Too many times to count

She arrived back at her house near one am.

She always enjoyed coming back to her house, it was a signal that the day was over and she could rest.

She would see the grass lawn on either side of the grey-stone path, leading up to the front door; the small roof over the doorstep and the patio on the right; the two windows facing out to the front that each had a small balcony surrounding them; the tiled roof and the rough white edges, and she'd know, she was home.

And alone.

Again.

This is an old story plucked out of the files. I know I keep adding stories instead of chapters. Sorry sorry sorry. Don't worry about reviews but they are always loved xxx