I've been thinking about this for like a month now, so I'm just going to go for it. Also; wow! This is so very incredibly self indulgent and I wrote this to satisfy my gay goblin brain.
Start
"Don't you get it, Kang!?" Kirk can feel himself on the verge of yelling at the Klingon. "To defeat that thing, that Alien, we have to stop fighting. It gets weaker with the less hate there is!"
Not long after, a truce was made. Battles had stopped, but still it was not enough. The Alien was still there, vastly weaker but undeniably still active enough to try and mess with people's minds.
"We're not doing enough." Kang says bluntly.
"We're not doing enough." Kirk sighs, "Simply not fighting has helped, but we need more. We need- something else. Anything, will do; we have to make our emotions lighter. Everyone's still too tense."
"May I interject, Captain? Is it not in the nature of emotional beings to be able to create emotions out of physical and other such acts?" Spock asks.
Kirk stares at him for a moment before replying, "Mr. Spock are you implying I should bed the Klingons?"
"No, that was not my intention, I was merely suggesting simpler things such as perhaps a game of chess. The physical aspect I was referring to was such intimacies as prolonged contact in a friendly way, or if such chosen, more than friendly way." Spock explains. "Hugs would make an adequate example."
"Ah, I see what you mean." Kirk says, glancing around the room at a few passing disgruntled expressions, "I think that could be arranged."
"I suggest for a stronger way to weaken our enemy would be if we ourselves engaged in these acts with the Klingons rather than to each our own." Spock suggests.
Kirk nods slowly, "Perhaps we should ask Kang if he would be amenable to these arrangements?"
"As the old Earth saying goes, 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend'." Spock says.
"We might as well give your ideas a go, Captain." Kang finally speak ups, "If we are to be rid of this menace aboard the ship."
"Well now that it is agreed upon, I will assume Spock wont be joining in with this idea? Keeping in control of your emotions must considerably beneficial to this situation." Kirk says, turning his gaze back towards Spock.
"With how much that Alien has weakened already, that should be of no problem to me." Spock says.
With a nod towards Kang, Kirk goes over to wall and presses the button that he used to calm the crew previously. "This is the Captain. Everybody find a Klingon partner, except those still in med-bay, if there are any of you still there. To defeat the Alien being aboard this ship, we absolutely have to make nice and create at least somewhat positive emotion. Consider making a friend asap your absolute priority if we are to survive this. Those of you trapped, just ignore what's happening and do stuff to lighten your spirits as much as possible."
Kang strides over to Kirk, "Kang here, listen to what the Captain of this ship says."
"Captain, if you would allow me, I shall go and oversee the other crew members, to make sure no one starts anything while we are not there to stop it." Spock says.
"Sure, Spock." Kirk nods, watching Spock leave the room.
"I should probably send some of my men to find themselves a partner for this." Kang says, he glances around the room, giving curt nods to a majority of his crew, save for Mara who walks up to Kang.
"Husband, if we are to choose human counterparts for this, may I return to the Bridge? I'll choose there." Mara says.
"Then go, do as you will." Kang nods, watching as his wife leaves the room.
That left Kang, Kirk, the Alien and a stray guard or so along with Sulu, who was currently quietly chatting to one of the guards. The both of them clearly trying to put in the effort. Kirk turns back to Kang, "We shall partner together, I assume?"
"Yes." Kang says, taking a step towards Kirk.
They're both silent for a moment until Kirk starts feeling the almost nonexistent tug of the Alien at the border of his mind, "Well then let's get this done with, shall we?" He says, inching closer.
"Considering we have no recreational activities, we might as well hug this out." Kirk says, averting his gaze for a second. Kang's slight nod allowed Kirk to slowly wrap his arms around the Klingon, Kang returning the sentiment.
It's stiff for the first few minutes and even after loosening up and relaxing a bit they can feel the Alien grow much weaker, but it's still not enough. "We need to do more, this is still not enough." Kirk mumbles, glancing up at the Alien, it's lights steadily blinking, almost faded completely.
"Hey Captain, perhaps some tongue?" Sulu's voice laughs and Kirk shoots him a friendly glare. Sulu and his Klingon friend were snickering as they watched their Leaders. Seemed to have become friends fast, Kirk muses.
"I'd report you for insubordination for that, Mr. Sulu, but given the circumstances I wont." Kirk grins.
"Is your subordinate suggesting what I think he's suggesting?" Kang asks.
"Most likely." Kirk says, tightening his grip around Kang's waist.
Surprisingly Kang laughs and Kirk finds himself grinning along too. They sneak a glance at the Alien and can tell it's almost 100% weakened. Perhaps a tiny bit more a push will finally get it to leave the ship or perish, he wasn't entirely sure what would happen to it if he had to be honest. Kang seems to have noticed as well, "You know, your crewman may be right." He whispers.
Kirk freezes for a second, before relaxing again; he hadn't exactly thought that Sulu's joking comment would be taken too seriously. "Are you... alright with that? What about your wife?"
"She would not mind. What is to be is to be done." Kang replies, pulling back from Kirk a bit to face him properly.
"Well, alright then." Kirk says, glancing over at Sulu and the other Klingon who appear to be in heavy conversation about something, apparently to do with melee weapons based on what Kirk can pick up from where he's standing.
With Kirk's agreement, Kang bends forward and none to gently mashes his lips against Kirk's. At first Kirk was taken aback at the force but then quickly regains his composure, kissing back with as much force. It took a few seconds to get used to skin textures being completely different, and despite Kirk having kissed many people of many different races, he had yet to kiss a Klingon; and he would be a liar if he said he wasn't enjoying it. Kang's hands slid from Kirk's shoulders into his hair, drawing him in deeper whilst Kirk's hands came to rest on Kang's waist. Kirk silently wondered if he was the first human to make-out with a Klingon and be the first of his race to feel how wonderful that tongue was inside his mouth.
Kirk could feel himself getting lost in how good the kiss felt,not noticing he's now pushed against the wall, Kang kissing him with an almost hungry nature. There were few breathing breaks, the both of them choosing to breathe through their nose instead. Eventually the kiss slowed down to much gentler and calm kisses, with Kirk sliding his arms up and around Kang's neck. When Kang slips his leg between Kirk's thighs, neither of them were going to say anything until a voices pierces the suddenly noticeable silence, making them break away from each other with a jolt.
"Um, Captain? I think it's about time to tell you that the Alien thing or whatever it was disappeared like 3 minutes ago." Sulu says, his face slightly flushed. The Klingon he was looked like he was trying his best to stifle a laugh.
"Oh, ah... thanks for that Mr. Sulu." Kirk mumbles, face flushed. "Didn't think to tell me, oh I don't know, at the time it disappeared?"
"You seemed busy." Sulu shrugs, "I'd hate to interrupt." At that comment, the Klingon beside Sulu let out a bark of laugh.
"Yeah yeah, alright." Kirk says, slowly pushing himself away from Kang, who looked a little mussed up himself. The both of them silently fixing their crinkled uniforms.
"Well now that this whole Alien mess is out of the way, I shall show you and your men to guest rooms and drop you off at whichever place you need to be." Kirk says, attempting to flatten his hair out. His mouth red and kiss swollen would be much harder to hide from his crew.
"I suppose I should thank you for your hospitality." Kang says, fixing his collar.
"How would you like to be thanked?" Kirk asks.
"Depends; what are you offering?" Kang replies, staring unblinkingly at Kirk.
Sulu and his Klingon friend just watch on in amusement at their free show.
End
I'm sure as none of you are aware, I literally cannot remember how the episode actually ended and it has been a while since I watched it. Actually, for my usual Followers? I'm as surprised as you are that I wrote Star Trek fics! Never ever thought I would see the day.