Alexis and Starscream was my very first HumanxTransformer OTP. My heart breaks, every time I watch the episode "Clamp". That's why I decide to write this fanfic. Honestly, I don't understand why there's just a few fics of both. OK, in a way, it's a unlike couple, considered that Starscream is a Cybertronian and Alexis it's only 12 years old. But still, they have a strong bond, nobody can denied that.

Transformers Armada belongs to Hasbro and Takara. The song belongs to Nickelback.

"Blah, blah, blah"- Normal Speech

"Blah, blah, blah"- Thoughts

"Blah, blah, blah"- Alexis' conscience

"Blah, blah, blah" -Starscream's speech

"Blah, blah, blah"- Starscream's thoughts

Heaven's gates won't open up for me
With these broken wings I'm fallin'
And all I see is you
These city walls ain't got no love for me
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story
And oh I scream for you
Come please I'm callin'
And all I need from you
Hurry I'm fallin'

(Savin' Me -Nickelback)

A world of metal.

In the sky, a moon with horns orbited this world, as if it were a demon in disguise, watching over the planet beneath it.

Two leaders were fighting. One tried to make the other see the danger that the horned moon represented, but the second was too stubborn and too proud to notice.

A third warrior appeared. Challenging the second leader, the two began to fight. The warrior also believed in the danger of the moon with horns. And he was willing to do anything to make the second leader realize that. Anything.

The fight was violent. Until with one last blow, the second leader severely wounded the warrior. The warrior made one last request for the second leader: he asked that he and the first leader join forces to destroy the moon with horns.

Finally, the warrior gathered all his strength to give his last shot. The first leader begged him not to do this, but there was nothing that could change his mind at that moment. But the moon with horns shot back, a shot far more powerful than that of the warrior... turning him nothing more than dust…

Alexis POV

"STARSCREAM!"

I woke up abruptly. My breath was racing, my cheeks were wet with tears, and I was sweating so hard that my pajamas were stuck to my skin. Another nightmare.

I tried to calm myself, but it was almost impossible. The images of the dream continued to pass before my eyes, as if it were a broken movie.

Six months had passed since Unicron had been destroyed and the Autobots had brought me, Rad, Carlos, Billy, and Fred back to Earth. And... It also been 6 months since Starscream had sacrificed himself to save Cybertron.

How I'd love to say things were back to normal, before we met the Autobots and were involved in this war between the Transformers. But they were not. At least not for me.

I tried not to mourn the death of the former Decepticon and tried to move on with my life... but my nightmares at night were not allowing this. Every night, I've been dreaming about the times we spent together... sometimes I dreamed of moments that might have happened if by chance he had chosen to stay with the Autobots. But always at the end of my dreams... I saw him dying.

A flash of light struck my eye, making me blink. It was already dawning, which was a relief, since I did not need to sleep anymore and have a chance to have another nightmare. I got up and started to get dress. A green reflection on my bedside table caught my eye; it was my lucky charm. The stone of Mars that Starscream had brought to us as a gift. I stood for several minutes looking at the necklace, wondering if I should wear it or not. Although I feel my heart clench every time I look at the stone, this is the only memory I have of my brave friend. Finally, I took the necklace, trying not to think too much about what I did, or else I would end up crying.

I went down to the kitchen and began to prepare breakfast. It was too early for my parents to be awake, which made me grateful, I was not in the mood to see the look of pity and worry on their faces. Since we came back from our "mysterious journey", we are all having problems with our parents (Rad is taking a little less because he had told his father about the Autobots and he had believed, but his mother was extremely paranoid, taking and bringing him from school and always wondering what he was doing). Considering that we disappeared for months, giving vague explanations of what had happened when we returned, what should we expected?

With my parents, thanks to my nightmares, they are treating me as if I would break with the slightest touch. Every day, my mother had tried to talk to me to see if they can figure out why I'm so depressed and try to help me. Even though it's nice of them, what I'm going to say? "I'm sad mom, because a friend of mine died. In fact, he sacrificed himself to save his home from an evil being. Oh, did I mention he was a giant alien robot?" It would not help. It would only bring more questions that I could not answer.

After breakfast (a cup of coffee with milk and a couple of biscuits. I was not very hungry), I took my backpack and my scooter and left. Since it was still too early, I decided to kill time walking around the city. But how I missed Sureshock. It was so fun to drive with her. She always knew what to say to make me feel better.

I was not even paying attention to where I was going. I just walked around town. But when I realized, I was on the road that would lead to the autobot base. Pff! What an idiot. The Autobots had returned to Cybertron. There would be no one there. But... how good it would be if I had. Optimus would know what to say to comfort me. Red Alert was an excellent listener and Hot Shot would say something that would make me laugh and make me feel better.

However, this was not the case. So I turned around, it was almost time for school anyway.

Upon arriving, I saw several students look at me and start whispering with their classmates. I did not mind, since we got back, it's been pretty common. Our disappearance has generated many questions from other people. As we could not answer the questions, theories and rumors began to develop (Interestingly, one of the rumors was that we had been abducted by aliens. Kind of close to reality).

"Alexis! Hey!" Rad called out. Carlos was on his side.

"Hi, guys. You're early," I commented. But I did not fail to notice that my voice sounded tired and melancholy. I must change that, or they are going to start asking questions.

"Are you okay, Alexis?"

Too late.

"Of course, Rad. I am fine. Just tired," I replied, managing to make my voice sound more normal. I could see that he had not believed it, but at least he did not say anything else. Rad was the person who knew the most how much Starscream's death had affected me. Still, I could not talk to him about how much it was upsetting me. None of the boys would understand.

"Liar!"

I stopped, shocked at the cry of my conscience. Why had I thought that?

"You know why."

I shook my head angrily. I should not think of this now!

Finally, the school bell rang and everyone entered the building.

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That day at school would be a different day: we would visit the Cosmoscope Research Center. Even those who already knew the place, for their parents working there, were excited to have a day without class. I did not really care. In the last few days, nothing has excited me much. In fact, it feels like I'm in a movie scene, where all the people and the scenery move very fast, while I'm the one standing. And when I see, hours have passed without my noticing. It is not a pleasant feeling.

The buses to take us on the tour arrived. Everyone came in. I sat on the last benches, hoping no one would sit by my side. I did not want to talk to anyone, not even Rad or Carlos. I know I was acting glum, but I could not bring myself to care.

The trip was quick. One of the site workers, greeted us. I stood well behind the group, so numb that I could not even hear what they were saying. I guess I'd rather be having a regular class instead of being here. At least I would have the studies to focus on. And I was less likely to ramble.

Whenever I start to ramble, I cannot help myself and start thinking about "what if..."

"What if I had pleaded more for Starscream to join the Autobots?"

"What if we had warned the Autobots that we had left with the Minicons?"

"What if I had said more times that I was his friend?"

"What if I had listened him more?"

I had read somewhere, that it's common for relatives and friends of suicide victims to blame themselves for the death of the person. Although Starscream did not actually commit suicide, I doubt he knew of the possibility that he would not survive. And I felt responsible for his death, not matter if I tried to think otherwise.

The guide took us to the outside of the premises, where he began to explain about the function of the site antennas. Some of the students were listening. The other part was pretending to listen. As for me, I was not listening and was not pretending to listen. I was looking at the landscape of the hill. I could see the whole city from there; if I wanted to, I could see my house. The icy wind hit my face, but it was a nice sensation. And the blue sky, without a cloud, gave the impression that if jump, I would be able to fly.

"Starscream would love to fly in this sky," I said to myself. I realized, too late that I should not have thought of it, for I began to feel tears forming in my eyes. "Damn it! Stop it! Stop!" I thought to myself, hitting my own head!

It was all a lie. It wasn't true that I did not want to talk to my parents and my friends because they would not understand or because I did not want to worry them. It was a lie that if the Autobots and Sureshock were here, I would talk to them. The truth was that I did not want to talk at all to anyone!

I feel like every time I talk about Starscream, something disappear! Details of his armor that were once so clear to me become obscure! His voice, which once sounded so real, every day seems to become a whisper that I can no longer hear right. Memories become mere remembrances! And I do not want to forget! I don't want to be comforted! I don't want to be healed! I don't want to be touched! Do not extinguish my pain! Even if the pain it's too much for me to bare, it's the only thing that's keeping my memories alive.

I know it's sad and even pathetic... but... please...

"ALEXIS! WATCH OUT!" I heard Rad scream, waking me from the daydream. Without my noticing, I had gone RIGHT to the edge of the hill. And I made a fool of myself to look down! When I saw the height of the hill, I felt a wave of vertigo... making me slip... and fall!

For mere seconds, I did not understand what was happening. Was I falling?! "NO! HELP!" I screamed in despair, even though I knew no one could save me now! In those seconds, when I saw the ground approaching, I screamed a name. I do not know why, I know it was stupid, but at that moment, I just could not bear it... and I screamed;

"STARSCREAM!"

And everything went black.

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In one place, far from space and time, a seeker stared at nothing, completely numb. This seeker had once sacrificed his own life to save his planet and the people most important to him.

However, perhaps because of the shock of the moment he died, or perhaps a cruel trick done by the being that killed him, he could not remember anything. Not even his own name.

Therefore, he was floating in that place, oblivious to everything.

Until…

"Starscream"

A sound. It was so unexpected that the seeker was frightened for a moment. His orange optics gleamed for the first time since he'd come to this place.

"Starscream"

The sound again. Why was saying that? It sounded so familiar, could it be...?

"That... is my name." He spoke for the first time. The moment he remembered, memories began to assault his mind: Cybertron. Decepticons. Autobots. Megatron. Optimus Prime. Minicons. The war. The planet Earth...

He didn't notice, but as his memories returned, his painting, which before was totally gray, was gaining colors, the main being red and white.

Suddenly, a light began to glow in the darkness. Instinctively, Starscream began to fly in that direction.

"STARSCREAM!"

This last cry sounded so desperate that the jet accelerated his engines to the maximum. That voice sounded familiar. Who was?

When he finally reached the light, he found himself in a blue sky. The landscape was very familiar but he did not have time to remember, for he saw a human girl falling from a hill.

His memories were starting to come back, so Starscream remembered he knew the girl and felt that if she got hurt, he would not be able to forgive himself.

Accelerating in a way he did not think was possible he caught her. Picking up the girl carefully, he slowed the speed of the fall and avoided the tree branches until he reached the ground and deposited her gently. She slowly opened her eyes "S-Starscream..." stammered, before lost consciousness completely.

"Alexis," he said softly. Yes, that was her name. The first person to trust him and the only one who kept doing it, even after he betrayed the Autobots. And it was her voice that had awakened him from that numb state. But was it your impression or was she thinner?

However, when he touched her face, Starscream was shocked. He was the size of a human! He was so focused on saving the girl from the fall that he hadn't noticed this. How could this be?!

"Hurry! This way!" Unknown voices screamed in the woods, heading toward them.

"Slag! I need to hide! But I cannot leave Alexis alone..." he thought without knowing what to do.

Then an adult man and woman appeared. The Seeker was preparing to hear the screams of fright. But to his surprise, he doesn't hear anything.

"Quick! See if she has a pulse!" The woman shouted at the other. As the man examined her, Starscream stared at everything very confused. Why were the humans acting like he was not there?

"ALEXIS!" Voices shouted. These, sounding familiar to him.

"Carlos! Bradley! Please, stay away!" The teacher ordered, holding tightly the two desperate young boys.

"Carlos! Bradley... Rad! I know those two!" He reminded. "Can they see me too?" asked to himself. To test his theory, he placed himself right in front of them. But (to his disappointment) there was no reaction from any boy.

"But what about Alexis?! Is she...?!" Carlos asked hysterically.

"She has a pulse. But it's better that no one touches her until the doctors arrive!" The teacher responded as best she could to calm them down.

It was not long before the ambulance arrived. The doctors placed her on a stretcher and proceed to take the young woman to the hospital. Starscream was out of the way, not wanting to disturb anything. But at one point, while he was distracted… one of the doctors walked through him.

"What?! How that…?! What?!" He could only shout confused. "But I managed to hold Alexis, so I was solid at the time! How come that now no one sees, hears and walks through me, as if I don't exist?" He wondered, "Could it be that..." he thought of a possibility. Seeing the ambulance pull away, he decided, "There's only one way to find out!" turned into jet form and went to follow the ambulance.

This was to be a One-shot. But I couldn't wait to post. I hope the next chapter don't take long.