A/N: Another Evanescence inspired work. Which is still not a songfic. Poem based on "My Immortal".

It happened again today.

I tried to go about my life –
move on, as they say. But then
I heard your voice
in the birdsong
in the sighing of the wind-ruffled trees.
And though I thought it had finally become an endurable scar,
the wound opened yet again.

Do you understand?
Did you ever feel this way?
You lost so much in life,
much more than I have –
yet your innocent heart remained that way.
Innocent.

Perhaps naïve was a better word, yet
I wouldn't have it any other way;
it's what made you an eternal child.
Yes, even if we had been granted our wish,
had you stayed longer,
long enough to watch your seeds become exquisite blossoms -
even then, you would have the soul of purity.

On warm sunny days,
the ones you loved best,
the breeze carries a hint of your floral, otherworldly scent.
It doesn't remind me of your scent, mind you;
It is your scent.
Other times, I wake in the night;
I can just make out your beautiful face –
but never well enough to know if exists here
or merely in the dream I've left behind.

Are you gone or not?

If you are,
let me heal in peace.
If you aren't…
what kind of cruel joke is this?

…No, you were never cruel.
I can't believe that death would change that.

I'm convinced now – you're still here.
Perhaps you aren't at peace after all -
Is it because I'm not?

I understand -
you're trying to comfort me.
Yet there is little solace to be had from a shadow,
because you're no longer
the you that I knew.

I don't want this half-whisper;
I want your voice - or silence.

Not this wavering, unsure image;
you, pure and whole – or blackness.

Not the cold mist of the unearthly;
your cool touch like new petals – or emptiness.

I love you forever - surely you know that.
My love was in the gentle grasp of my hand
holding yours by the moonlit lake.
It was there in the firm embrace of my body
shielding your delicate one from an unwarranted attack.
And - I have finally realized -
it was even in the horrid act of depressing the trigger,
shattering your body
and my soul.

It's impossibly hard to ask this, but please -
leave while I still have my sanity.
It's all I have left,
as my heart always has,
and always will,
belong to you.