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Thank-yous to my beta VampyMusiK. You're the greatest. :)

Preface

Renesmee

I was four and my brother was five when one day Dad decided to take us out. I don't remember where Mom had been that day but I know she would have kicked my Dad's ass for taking us to the beach in the middle of November. For my brother and me it was the best day ever, though.

I still remember my awe and surprise when I saw the ocean for the first time. Dad often told me that he took me to see the ocean when I was three months old but I'd never counted it because I had no memory of it. Anyway, while Dad and my brother were running towards the cold water I stood there on the beach, worshipping the great sight in front of me.

I don't know where they came from but suddenly my cousins were there too with my Uncle Em who greeted me with his usual grin. While I stood there shivering he picked up his daughter and me and ran towards the sea so he could throw us in.

I remember the terror I felt at that exact moment. The water was ice cold and I couldn't swim. My limbs were frozen and I felt disoriented. My only thought was to find Dad and with that I screamed for him with everything I had only to have the salty water fill my lungs.

The moment Dad's arms wrapped around me I felt safe and protected. There isn't any other better feeling in the world than to feel your father's arms wrap around you and to know that for the moment you are there, you're safe. I was lucky enough to have that unlike many other girls who didn't have Dads.

I was also lucky enough to have a functional family. My mother was one of the kindest people I knew. She was so good that it was almost painful because she refused to see the bad in people who were damaged irrecoverably and often suffered from that but that was the reason why my Dad worshipped the ground she walked on.

My parents' marriage was something miraculous. They were only seventeen when they had my brother and eighteen when they had me but my brother and I hadn't felt unwanted. They made sure to say how much we were loved each day.

I also had a little sister Stacey who was the most perfect girl in the world. I was proud to be her relative because this thirteen year old miracle was a blessing in our family. Everyone loved her and spoiled her rotten but she was kind, nurturing and talented. I loved her with everything I had because she was truly wonderful.

And of course, I should mention my brother Anthony. Oh, he was so naïve and loving, that it was sickening! Just like Mom he refused to see the bad and lived with good traits, not noticing what a bitch of a girlfriend he had. A girlfriend who was slowly killing him and was planning to destroy our family by sinking her disgusting claws into his sensitive flesh. Literally and figuratively.

I should also remember my friends at school… Shelley and Monica who were the silliest blonde girls ever but I loved them like sisters. They were typical girls who cared only about their appearances and boys. They loved shopping and gossiping but they were fierce and loyal no matter what. They knew what 'girl code' meant unlike Edith.

I probably should be pissed at her but I can't. She was my sister not by blood but by heart. I loved her unconditionally and I would never have done things she did to me even though she probably regretted them. She wasn't cruel intentionally but she ripped a piece of my soul with her lies and secrets. I truly believed that we had no secrets when it came to one another…

But I probably shouldn't blame Edith. It was Jacob's fault. That fucker who broke my heart and completely broke me. He was going to pay for it – all of them were. Mia – that heinous bitch who thought she was so smart that she could fool my silly brother. And EJ – my cousin. If anything else hurt it was his stupid remarks about me and my appearance. If Edith broke my trust and Jacob broke my body then EJ broke my spirit.

They all deserved punishment and I hoped that God was gracious enough to give it to them. I knew I wasn't godsend or anything but they had to suffer just like I did. So this is my last prayer…

Dear Lord,

You have seen what those sinners have done. They broke me, they broke my soul. I hope you are forgiving enough to understand why I had to do this. Please, Lord, give me strength to go through this. They deserved this and I deserved peace. I hope I won't burn in hell for this.

Amen.

Thank you for reading,

Gintare.