A/N: This is another re-post. I went back and fixed some things, and fixed some of the formatting.
I still love this song. It's just…I'm in love with it. I really hope every one that reads this listens to the song.
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or its characters; that would Don Bellisario. And the song and lyrics are owned by Pillar.
Tell me when it's over
Never thought we'd be here
Moments passing by, I'm losing you
So much that I never knew
I couldn't bring it out of you
Caught up in the history, it won't let you go
Go ...
He watched her walk across the catwalk, willing her to look at him. She hadn't been to his house in weeks; their relationship was shutting down, he could feel it.
The beginning had been glorious. The sparks, the passion, the love. It had been like Europe, only better. Then, life had gotten in the way, like they knew it would.
She'd been bombarded with calls from SecNav on the weekend they'd planned to just spend in bed together. She'd had to take them, he knew, but he'd still been upset. After about the sixth call, he'd finally said something. 'Who are you with Jen? SecNav, or me?' He hadn't missed the hurt in her eyes before she'd shut down, steel coming in front of her emotions. She'd left, and hadn't spoken to him outside of work in two weeks.
This Le Grenouille business was killing their relationship. Secrets, lies, they kept popping up, and pushing them apart. There was so much he didn't know about her, things that just kept coming to the surface. Things she'd never told him.
She was caught up in history; she needed to let go. There was no way they could move forward and build their relationship if she was stuck in the past. He wanted her, but he wanted her to see the future, not the past.
He knew he wasn't her first priority, and that's what killed him.
When the sun comes up tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you be there?
If I fade away tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you stay here?
He turned in bed, glancing at the bare back of his lover. Things weren't back to the way they had been just yet; they still had a lot to work through, but he hoped they could make it.
He stroked his fingers across her pale skin, feeling her stir slightly. She shifted from her side to her back, turning her head towards him. Her green eyes were still laced with sleep, her red hair tousled from their activity in the earlier evening. She let a small smile cross her face as she let his fingers explore her skin, sighing quietly at his gentle touch.
He leaned forward, capturing her lips in a soft kiss as his fingers drifted across her toned stomach muscles, feeling them quiver. He deepened the kiss, but he could still feel her reluctance.
He knew she had a meeting early in the morning. He knew she had to get up. But he wanted her, he wanted her to stay, he wanted her to sleep in his bed; in his arms. So he continued his kisses, his touches, telling her with his actions what he wanted desperately to tell her with words.
He wanted her to stay with him.
As he drifted to sleep afterwards, he couldn't help but wonder where she'd be in the morning.
Tell me it's not over
I can't see it anymore
All the love is passing by, I'm losing you
Of all the things I ever said
Never meant so much regret
Hard to see the future if the past is in the way
Can we find a way?
It couldn't end. He wouldn't let it.
He loved her, more than anything in the world. He loved her like he had loved Shannon; more than any of his ex-wives, more than all three of them combined, in fact. He would not let her just slip away.
He knew that there was a lot working against them; their pasts, their jobs. But their feelings could overcome them. In his mind, at least. He honestly didn't know what she thought.
Jenny didn't know what to do. She loved Jethro with everything she had; but she didn't know if that was enough. There was so much history with them, so much baggage. They both had broken pasts, and she couldn't get past that. She couldn't let herself be happy when her father's memory was tarnished with lies. How could she?
She glanced down into the bullpen as she walked to her office from MTAC, down at Team Gibbs. Her gaze softened ever so slightly when she took in Jethro's team surrounding the small girl they'd rescued in the recent case. She took in the gentleness Jethro exuded, painfully reminded of his daughter, Kelly.
She didn't want to hurt him, and she knew that her hesitation, her secrecy was doing just that. The last time she'd slept at his house, she'd slipped out before he'd woken up. She'd had an early meeting with SecNav, and she'd had to go home to get ready. She knew he'd taken it badly; his team had been terrified he'd explode the entire case they'd worked that day.
She didn't know if they could find a way, but she hoped they could.
When the sun comes up tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you be there?
If I fade away tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you stay here?
Jenny looked at his worn, weathered face, and couldn't help but wonder what he was dreaming as he slept. She wondered if it was of her, or if it was of his family. She liked to think it was of her, but she knew that was selfish. His family had been, and probably always would be, his life. And she'd accepted that.
She drew a finger down his cheek, tracing the lines around his mouth and his eyes with the pad of her forefinger. As each year passed, there were more wrinkles on his face and more gray hairs on his head, but he only grew more handsome to her. His calloused hand rested on her bare hip, his fingers splayed across her stomach. The rough skin rubbed against her softer curves, eliciting a shiver from her.
She wanted to just be happy with him, more than anything in the world. She wanted, for once, for her life to be easy. Simple. She wanted to allow herself to be happy with Jethro.
She wanted to stay.
There is just one thing about you
It's I just can't live without you
So I'll just keep holding on.
Jethro gazed at Jenny as she read her book on his couch, his eyes running over her.
Things had been easier lately, but there were still many obstacles and hurtles they had to overcome before they were in the home stretch.
She seemed to sense his gaze, because she looked up from what she was reading, flashing him a brief smile before turning her gaze back down. He couldn't help but wonder why she seemed so much more relaxed. Like a weight had been removed from her shoulders.
Every night the past two weeks, Jenny had spent the night with him, had been there in the morning. It had been natural, easy, the way it should be all the time.
They hadn't talked about anything yet, about how things were going to work, or how they were going to balance everything. He knew they needed to, but he didn't want to break the spell that had allowed them to be happy for these two weeks.
He knew that if she were to leave again, he wouldn't survive. His love for her was all-consuming, and there wasn't any getting over it. He couldn't let go. He wouldn't let go.
There is just one thing about you
It's I just can't live without you
So I'll just keep holding on.
Jenny read her book on Jethro's couch, the atmosphere light and relaxed.
The past two weeks had been heaven. Focusing on Jethro instead La Grenouille had made her more relaxed, and it was like the tension in their relationship had melted away. She knew it wouldn't always be that simple, but it was nice to just forget about everything for the few moments she could.
She couldn't leave again. There was no way she'd be able to survive it, not again. It had been hard enough the first time. Breaking your own heart was never easy, but breaking Jethro's heart had hurt more than she'd ever say. Love was eternal, they said, and Jenny had been more than grateful to find that that statement was correct.
Jethro taking her back had been the most wonderful thing that could have happened to her. His coma and leaving for Mexico had been the catalyst to their relationship; he'd come back after the Paulsen case and everything had just fallen into place. It had started out as naturally as breathing; they'd easily fallen back into their relationship, and they'd started out deliriously happy.
Life, though, had other ideas, as always.
But she knew she couldn't live without him. Life wasn't worth living without him. So she'd hold on for as long as she could. And she hoped that that was forever.
When the sun comes up tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you be there?
They lay tangled in bed, fingers exploring, breathing slowly.
Jethro ran his fingers along her breastbone, knuckles brushing against her soft skin. Her breathing hitched as his fingers ran along the swell of her breast, a low moan sounding in her throat. He trailed kisses along her clavicle, down her sternum and across her toned stomach.
She arched into his touch, electricity running along her spine when two of his fingers entered her. As he moved them, her breathing turned to shallow pants, and she called his name as he dragged her over the edge. Withdrawing his fingers, he draped himself over her. She met his lips in a passionate kiss as he made love to her, the burn in his lower abdomen urging him forward.
As they lay in the afterglow, still intertwined, he kissed her head softly, drawing courage to say what he needed to. Lacing their fingers together, he shifted onto his side so that he could face her.
She turned towards him, pushing her thick crimson hair out of her face. She sensed he wanted to say something, and she met his deep, cerulean gaze, wanting to hear what was on his mind.
He looked into her soft, emerald green gaze, and knew that this would work. They meant too much to each other to just let their love disintegrate. He leaned forward slightly, his lips brushing hers in a light kiss. Pulling back, he found her eyes bright with happiness and her teeth sunken into her bottom lip in an attempt to hold in the grin.
He let a half-smile settle on his face as he traced a finger down her cheek, hearing her soft sigh. Running his thumb over her bottom lip, soothing where her teeth had left marks, he spoke.
"Will you be here in the morning?"
"I'll be here every morning Jethro."
The sincerity in both her soft alto voice and her big green eyes were all the confirmation he needed. With her statement he drew her closer, tucking her head under his chest. He stroked up and down her back as they fell asleep, and he knew she'd be there in the morning. Every morning.
When the sun comes up tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you be there?
If I fade away tomorrow
Will you be there?
Will you stay here?
A/N: I seriously considered ending this with her not staying, but my happy-ending complex kicked in, and I ended it how I did. Real life has enough angst.