Call to Adjust
By: PinkDragonStrike
I don't own Inuyasha
I don't own the song California King Bed by Rihanna (I did change a few words to keep it appropriate for Sesshoumaru and Rin)
This is not a song fic though!
Sesshoumaru had gotten used to Rin's call and had always come to her aid but now in Kaede's village, Rin's silent call is asking him to do something else much harder…adjust to life without her. Oneshot
"Chest to chest, nose to nose, palm to palm we were always just that close. Wrist to wrist, toe to toe [your scent] that [smelled] just like the inside of a rose…so how come when I reach out my fingers, there seems like more than distance between us…"
"Good-bye Lord Sesshoumaru."
He turned to look over his shoulder at Rin one last time as she spoke his name from the edge of Inuyasha's village. He could see her tiny hand wave as she wiped a lone tear from her face. The old lady Kaede placed her worn hands against the small girl's shoulders to reassure him that she would be ok.
His instincts tore at him. The simple mention of his name slipping from her lips made him want to turn back, scoop her in his arms, and carry her away. He wanted to be the one to protect her and make sure that she was safe. But he knew that wasn't to be. He had to move forward without her. The decision was never his to leave her there. She had made the decision with Kaede's sway and he only had the option to agree.
As Sesshoumaru moved deeper into the forest, he realized how much that the little girl had impacted him down to the smallest of things. Even Jaken and AhUn were quiet and it left him feeling empty. Their world had revolved around her for what seemed like decades when in fact it had not even been a full year.
The routes that he took, the stops that were made, and even the simplicity of the fire burning as the little girl sang herself to sleep had become a part of them. He already missed how Rin would point out the birds because they sang or the caterpillars because of their unusual markings.
As night fell Sesshoumaru signaled to the group to take their usual break to rest. He caught himself about to ask Jaken to make a fire but realized there was no need tonight and there wouldn't be for some time. Despite his lack of direction, he noticed Jaken drag off into the woods, bring back firewood, and light it with the staff of two heads. The imp sat there melancholy, staring into the flames as if waiting for something to happen. Before long the imp was drawing what looked like a face with a side pony tail in the dirt. AhUn laid on the ground and curled its tail in as if saving the empty space for the little girl to come and fill it at any moment. In a way, he was grateful that the two had not skipped a beat and had still acted as if Rin was there…almost.
Eventually Jaken and AhUn fell asleep leaving Sesshoumaru to his own thoughts. He would usually scout the grounds at this time but there was no point in doing so tonight for several reasons, all of which connected to Rin in some way.
He could recall the many times during nights like this when he was scouting the area that she would call for her lord. Maybe a nightmare or a noise that she felt Jaken or AhUn couldn't handle would lay claim to his presence. Even when he knew that it was not a serious matter, he came and she knew that he would.
His senses had been trained to Rin's scent and her call alone. Of all the instincts of a typical inu, this was the only one that he could not ignore. At least, it was what he had come to believe.
But maybe, it was the fact that Sesshoumaru had not realized that he needed Rin just as much as she needed him. She had changed him in so many ways. She had filled his life with more purpose and excitement than he ever allowed himself to admit until now. Her presence was what gave him balance. She was wise for her age and had opened his eyes to the things that he had ignored or simply had not been able to see.
It was at that moment that Sesshoumaru found himself…unsure. He hardly believed that things would return to the way that they were before. There would be no sing song greetings or pestering of Jaken which he inwardly enjoyed. The laughter and giggles that filled their space would be gone. He wouldn't return to her smiling face or be there to comfort her if she had a nightmare. AhUn's saddle would be empty once again. Maybe what he dreaded the most was the silence. The silence itself wasn't the bother, but the fact that it was the eternal reminder that Rin, in fact, wasn't there was the problem.
Sesshoumaru was stirred from his thoughts as he heard Jaken begin to snore and AhUn grumble in response as the two heads flattened their ears in order to block out the sound.
He sighed audibly knowing that Jaken combined with his thoughts would not allow him to rest. Sesshoumaru moved from his spot against the tree and came to a cliff that overlooked Inuyasha's village. He felt slight doubt and then fear that he still would not hear her. He scolded himself for such a thought knowing full well that he would. He would have back at camp as well.
Though his hearing didn't match his nose, it was far better than any other youkai's hearing. Still, in order to improve it, he switched to his true form. Sesshoumaru sat there for a few moments hoping that he would hear Rin's voice. A laugh or a giggle would have even sufficed but alas he knew at this time the little girl was most likely sleeping. Maybe dreaming of the most exquisite flowers and butterflies. Maybe she would dream of her three traveling companions or the long journey that they shared.
Sesshoumaru laid down at the cliff's edge and closed his eyes, his thoughts slowly drifting. He knew that eventually he would have to leave and trust that she would be ok. He would have to come to accept the way that things were now. But it was going to take time for him to adjust to a life without her and until then, he would be waiting for her call.
Reviews are very much appreciated :o)
A/N: To all of the readers and writers out there that were following my stories and that I was reviewing and following, I apologize. I have not fallen off the face of the Earth, although it seems like it! I still love reading and writing fanfiction so you'll see me back here from time to time. Btw, I know that I have yet to finish More to Me and I've been thinking about rewriting one or two of the last chapters and finishing it but I can't make any promises. If something jumps at me, I'll be sure to update.