Author's Note: I do not own Jesus.
On a fluffy, cream cloud, Jesus sat solemnly and contemplated the sorry state of things on earth. The prayers of the innocent and downtrodden danced listlessly in his head, assaulting him with the sharp pains of so many needles. It had been this way for some time...while Jesus had always been listening to the myraid requests from his followers, they had never buzzed in his head so frantically and desperately, they had never stung him into such relentless, uncompromising headaches. It was a recent affliction, with no obvious source.
He had attempted to petition his father for explanation, but meekly decided against it. He remembered the pounding roars and snarls his father would bellow upon ever being disturbed. It was useless to wake him - and Jesus certainly did not know when God would finally recover from his sleepiness.
He sighed, trying to retain his composure. He needed something, anything to get his mind off of things that he could never change. With a frail snap of his fingers, a gameboy advance came into being, materializing upon Jesus' lap.
He looked at the device inquisitively, wondering whether it was worth the effort. The final stage of Sonic the Hedgehog had been quite a bother for him, so much so that he could sarcely refrain from hurling the newly born machine into the abyss. But he had to get his mind off of gay marriage.
The subject of gay marriage always troubled him. On one hand, the Bible was fairly clear about what is and what isn't allowed. On the other hand, he was suppose to symbolize love and tolerance. Jesus always had to balance his own identities and his own beliefs with the will of his father, and it was often a mentally exhausting and distressing task. Jesus just shook his hand and tried not to sigh again, lest he depress himself further.
He turned on the game boy advance, and soon enough for blue furry creature came into sight. 'At least you won't trouble me as the others do,' Jesus thought. He paused, then added 'Now eggman, that's a different story...' giving a weary, but optimistic smile.
End Chapter 1
Author's Note: I do not own Sonic the Hedgehog, God, or Eggman.