Disclaimers: I, as a fan fiction author, do not own most everything on this planet. Not that it's in this story, of course, but disclaimers are fun to say.
Running, panting, wheezing …even dying in some cases. You never really think about it until it's happening right then and there in front of your big fat face. Like now, for instance, where I haven't even existed until now, where I'm suddenly dropped out of the sky like a hailstone, expected by some wacky author to somehow and in some ridiculously impossible way to save the world by doing something heroic. Well, newsflash to ya, echidnas don't generally save worlds. We barely do anything for that matter. But, (sigh), apparently I am doing something, which obviously is running through a forest being chased by a megalomaniac trigger-happy alien/robot thing. Here goes.
"You cannot run, you pesky little rodent!" it snarled in a half robot, half squeaky E.T. voice which sent chills down my spiny spine. Trying to think of something smart- alecky to yell back, I made a decision.
"Uh .. you'll never take me alive? I think..?" I said lamely. It laughed. Expected. It pointed it's silver Optimus Maximus 20/21 at me. "Then I think I'll take you dead!"
"Crap."
I rolled into a spiny ball and dodged the freakish bullet. I swear that thing was on fire. Would you like your spiny anteater Medium or Well Done? The thing roared in anger and I could hear it's clanking/ squishing footsteps pound towards me. (Okay, this is the part of the story when I stop calling it thing. From now until I defeat it somehow at the end of the book, it will be called Tracy.) Why does it want ME? I thought, kind of in a state where I'm half choking my guts out, half laughing my guts out. Weird, huh? "You think your funny, don't you? Think you can defeat me by making puns to entertain the audience, huh?"
Man, this guy either was seriously the teacher's pet in evil robot school, or it's wicked good at telepathy.
I attempted to approach Tracy slowly, making a little 'Time out' sign with my overly large claws. "Might I ask why you are trying to kill me? I mean, I don't really remember me doing anything wrong. Come to think of it, I can't remember anything before last Tuesday!" I chuckled kind of nervously. It's head twisted around to my direction, revealing a grotesque, sickly green tinted face. It looked like it was melting. It had no eyes, no ears, and no nose. Just one big, yellow-toothed smile. And definitely not a happy smile. More like the smile that says I'm gonna eat you or something like that. "Oh, you have no idea." Tracy hissed his smile widening." That's right, I don't. Explain." I was losing my patience.
"You possess much, much more power than anything on this planet. Why, you COULD destroy even I in one fell swoop, but you haven't the slightest how." It snarled. "Now I have some unfinished business to attend to, so you be a good little egg-laying mammal, and stay put within a ten mile radius so I may return and destroy you." And with that, he vanished. I snorted. What evil villain expects the hero to 'stay put' so he can come back to DESTROY him? A really stupid one, for sure! I sighed and returned on all fours, wondering if that really happened or if I just spent way too much time at Starbucks last night. I wouldn't stick around long enough to find out anyway, since I lack in patience, so I crawled a couple miles and reached my burrow. Inching hesitantly in, I wasn't surprised to find my Father and little sis/bro (we still couldn't tell it's gender after ten years. Tragic, I know.) Waiting for me in the den, which was basically the only room. My Father eased up onto two legs.
"How was it?"
"How was what?" I gulped and looked down at my claws. He gave me THE LOOK. "Oh! Um.. it, was good. My walk was good.y' know, I think an evening stroll will do good to my skin every night. I even bet that..the doctor..will, say..so..Too." I stopped midsentence. "Er.. Would you believe me if I said a giant robot slash alien tried to neutralize me into ashes because I possess a power that could destroy everything that had been tapped into being and would possibly use me to do so, and then recolonize Earth with his own species of evil monsters?" I chuckled weakly. My father looked at me like I was crazy."Never mind me saying that. My walk was good, thanks for asking." I muttered and settled onto the floor next to my sibling, Kiosk. Oh, I almost forgot to tell you a bit about myself. I'm Marrow, like the bone. I'm a guy, I like to eat worms and such, and I dig holes like there's no tomorrow. At night, I transform into a hot Australian dude and go and hang with the humans at the nearest base camp, convincing them that I'm a pop artist in Sydney. Though everyone in Monotreme Town knows I can't even hit a C note without going into an Asthma attack. How, may you ask, that I turn into a human by night? I haven't the slightest clue. Perhaps I was cursed or something. Maybe it was something I ate. Maybe I was just born like that for no apparent reason. I really, truly don't know. Ask someone smart, like Bill Nye the science guy.
Anyway, enough talk. I crept out of the hole once my family was asleep exactly as I was morphing. No way that they could know. My claws blunted and turned into rough, callused hands. The spines sank into my body. I grew taller, and a chunk of bleached blonde hair fell over my left eye. My snout grew smaller and stubby. I looked down, and yes. Sigh of relief time. I was clothed. You wouldn't believe how many times this has happened and I haven't been. I dragged myself clumsily through the forest, but stopped when I heard a crackling sound. I whirled around on my heels . Tracy was right smack dab in front of me, leaning against a tree and looking as cool as a cucumber. " I told you I'd be back. Foolish Echidna. Time for you to come with me." He growled, green gunk dripping off his nasty metallic/ alien orb of a face. " I dunno whatcha talkin' bout', pal. I ain't no echidna whatsit, an I dunno who you are, eetha. Listen, I gotta get back home to my pals, so buzz off." I said, adopting a fake aussie accent, and backing up slowly like a frightened human. Which I kind of was. " You can't fool me! Die!" He snarled and lunged with a stun gun. To Be Continued…..