A/N: So... fast and crappy fic is fast and crappy. Wrote it last night during a class I probably should've been paying attention to. You can also probably guess what I was listening to when I came up with the idea by the title. -sigh- I'm not good at angst. But I'll leave the final judgement up to y'all. This also fudges with the timelines again. There are... two hints to different timelines, if you can find them. One of said timelines hasn't been written yet, but the idea is floating around in my head.
Warning: Wilkercest. Reese/Malcolm. Flaming prohibited. You get the gist. Also, I in no way own MitM, no matter how much I wish I did.
He found the letter taped to his toque one rainy morning in April. At first it didn't register in his mind that it was for him—he was too preoccupied with wondering why a folded piece of paper that said 'Read Me' was taped to his hat. But he'd learned to be a bit quicker mentally lately, so it only took him a few seconds to grab the paper and take it to his desk.
When he opened it, he was greeted by very familiar handwriting. Neat and tiny, the words spilled down the entire length of the page. He squinted to read it, and when he finished the letter fell from his hands to his desk.
His heart felt like it was going to burst from his chest, and his breathing intensified by the second. He glanced down at the paper he'd just read, and suddenly broke out in a cold sweat.
It couldn't be true. There was no way... What could possibly have compelled...
It had to be a trick. A sick and twisted trick. Something he might have pulled years ago. There was no way...
He bolted up from his chair and ran to his dresser, pulling drawers randomly from it, searching for any clue that would tell him it wasn't true. But there was nothing. Nothing.
He ran to the closet... only to find the same he'd found before.
Nothing.
His panic reached a fevered pitch and he rushed from the room, grabbing the keys to his truck on his way to the front door. It slammed shut behind him.
Back on his desk, the letter lay open for the world to see.
Dear Reese,
I know this is wrong of me. Making you read? Yeah, I know I'm a douche. But... bear with me, okay?
You need to know that I love you. I haven't been lying to you for all these years. Besides possibly Mom, you are the only other person who has ever understood me. You are the only person who could ever stand me for more than a few minutes. I have never been able to figure out why that is; I've thought about it a lot, but I've never been able to come up with an answer. All I do know is that it makes you a saint. To be understood is all I've ever wanted, and the fact that you are that one person who does makes me love you like you wouldn't believe.
But Reese... It's not going to work. No matter how much I want to be wrong, I know that we can't be together.
I'm not saying I feel ashamed. You know that I said to hell with taboo years ago. However, other people don't think like we do.
Hard times are coming, Reese. A lot of people are going to be paying a lot of attention to me soon. They'll do whatever they can to dig up as much information about me as they can—and they are very good at what they do. So good in fact, that I'm not sure I'll be able to protect you.
And I know what you're thinking. You don't think you need protecting. But you're wrong, Reese. If the wrong people found out about us, we could both go to prison. I don't want that for you. You deserve so much better.
So I'm leaving. By the time you read this I'll already be gone. I know you won't even consider it, but I'm begging you, please don't try to find me. I'm doing this so you can live a better life, even though it's killing me inside.
You're resilient, Reese. I know that at first you'll feel that you'll never heal, but you will. Eventually you'll find someone else, someone that makes the pain go away forever. All you have to do is wait. Be patient and don't let the pain consume you. You'll be fine. I know it.
I love you Reese. I wish I could say that enough to make up for this. Even as I write this letter I'm watching you sleep and wishing I could kiss you, or hold you. It's not fair. But then again, when is it ever?
I really need to stop this now. There is so much I want to say, but the more I sit here and think about it all, the easier it will be for me to change my mind. And I can't risk that. I can't risk your life.
All I can say now is that I'm sorry, Reese. I know what I'm doing is selfish in a way, and I know that telling you all this in a letter is a shitty move, and because of it I don't deserve you. In fact, I don't think I really ever did deserve you. So, maybe this really is for the best.
Go find someone better and be happy. And please, please don't follow me.
Yours forever,
Malcolm
I love you.
A/N: So, how'd ya like it? I know I didn't seem very enthusiastic up at the top there, but that was written several hours ago, and I just wasn't feeling into it. XD
Anyway, I don't feel this is complete. Like always. Something feels like it's missing. I would be completely wiling to take suggestions if anyone has any. If I like a suggestion, I may even edit it in. :D
I hope I did a good enough job with the angst to make you feel it. I'm terrible at this particular type of fic, but I do try. As always, reviews are not necessarily necessary. But they are appreciated. As are critiques, because improvement is my ultimate goal.
Also, this marks my third fic posted in less than a month. THAT is a record. I blame usedusername and her fic 'Deconstructive Reconstruction.' :D