Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious
Beck hadn't meant to get mad at Jade. It had been one of those days where everything went wrong. He didn't take the time to calm himself down. His head was pounding. It wasn't until later that he realized what he had done. Jade was understandably upset. He came up to her and put his hands on her shoulders messaging her gently until she relaxed. She was feeling a little bit better but her feelings were still hurt.
"Jade," he said, "I am so sorry about the way I acted. I mean it. I know that I was wrong to get mad. I don't know what I was thinking… and then being so insensitive after. I was having a bad day. I just wasn't thinking clearly. There's no excuse for what I did but I am so sorry and I love you"
Jade looked up in relief.
"I was so afraid that you stopped loving me," she said sniffling.
"Jade," he said, "It is impossible for me not to love you. That would be like the sun falling out of the sky and drying out the ocean. Even if that did happen I would still love you."
He paused.
"A... are you gonna get mad at me," he asked.
"Why? Because you're human? Because you made a mistake? No Beck, I'm not going to get mad at you for being human. I don't like what you did but I'm not at all even close to getting mad at you. It was a onetime thing. I forgive you but I do expect you to not do that anymore. You really hurt my feelings when you did that. Do you understand what I'm saying?"
"Of course I understand," he said
"Good," she smiled at him
"I do have to know one thing though. Why did you let everyone know Tori's secret?"
"I could ask you why you acted the way you did. I know that you care but there are much better ways to handle the situation then the way you did, but that's neither here nor there. Remember the pictures on the internet of me?"
Someone had posted pictures of Jade on the internet and they were less then flattering pictures.
"I remember," he said.
"Well Elizabeth said that she saw Tori post the pictures. I was pissed off and I didn't think clearly"
"First of all," he said, "You're right. I could have and I should have handled the situation better. I'm not going to pretend I did the right thing when I did the wrong thing. Secondly yes I do care. Finally just because Elizabeth said something it doesn't mean it's true. You of all people should know that"
Beck was referring to a time when Jade refused to give up even though 'the experts' said it was likely a hopeless situation. She told him "don't even think about giving up." He pointed out that everyone said that it was likely hopeless to which she responded, "I don't give a crap what anyone says. Just because they say it that doesn't make it true"
"Point taken," she said, "I'm still not giving up"
"I don't expect you to," he told her
"Good," she said with a smile
"But it may not be easy," he added, "But I'm not giving up either."
"Beck if it were easy it wouldn't be as worth it in the end. Getting to winner level isn't easy is it?"
"Jade," he said, "You are a winner. You're the one who keeps me going when I feel like giving up. You outright refuse to accept there is any possibility other then what you know is right. There's no proof of it but that doesn't matter to you. You don't need proof in order to understand that it's right."
"Damn right I don't," she said.
He brought up the idea of giving up one time when everyone said it was impossible. She wouldn't listen. He never brought up the idea again.
"So did Tori post the pictures," he asked bringing the subject back around.
"No. It turned out that Elizabeth posted the pictures"
"Yeah. I believe that," Beck said with a smirk, "She's kind of a bitch."
Jade laughed.
"Kind of? You mean like how Vega is kind of a winner?"
"Exactly," Beck said
"Speaking of winner and moving up to the next step-"
"Wait," he said, "When were we talking about that?"
She laughed.
"I dunno," she admitted, "Probably a few days ago."
He nodded grinning.
"Beck," Jade said, "Did I ever tell you thank you for loving me"
Beck ran a hand through his hair.
"You don't have to thank me for that," he said
"Most people give up on me," Jade said, "because I don't understand thing or because I'm different. They give up on me because I'm the odd one out or because I don't think the right way. They give up on me because I don't agree with them. You have never given up on me."
"And I never will," he told her firmly.
She smiled wryly.
"Even when I'm past hope," she asked.
"HEY," he told her, "You are never past hope. You are a part of me. I could no more live without you then I could live without air. There's no way my heart could not know you, sense you, feel you, love you. Losing anyone is hard for me but losing you would just about kill me."
Jade knew that Beck was the best of the best. He was her reason and her truth and her love and the world she knew. She clung to him like a small child clinging to their parents after having a bad day. Jade was a paradox. She didn't put up with any nonsense. When people tried to be cruel to someone she loved, whether it was Beck, her twin sister Ava or her little sister that she had raised from infancy… even Cat she put a stop to it. Nobody and nothing could stop her. If Jade were in the wrong place (which wouldn't happen) she would get to the right place come heck or high water. Jade was not one to give up. At the same time she clung to Beck ask if he were stuck on her like glue. If he would go somewhere she would come with him. If he didn't respond to her she would freak out sometimes. Beck didn't mind that she was like that but he did sometimes worry about her insecurity. He would try little tricks to get her to calm down. It worked most of the time. Sometimes it didn't and they would have to go back to the drawing board.
Beck always let Jade know how much he appreciated her. When she listened to him without arguing he let her know he was grateful for that. He understood certain things were very important to her and didn't argue it. There were times he would put his foot down but only once in awhile and only when it was important. Beck found Jade to be irresistible 100 percent of the time. They were connected. It wasn't just Him. It wasn't just her. It was THEM. He would never forget the first time Jade referred to them as we. She had said, "we should wait to do that". He raised an eyebrow and asked, 'we?'.
"Well we are a team," she said, "You're a part of me and I'm a part of you. Granted I didn't go through the same experience you went through but I still think of myself as your other half"
He kissed her.
"You're my better half," he said.
Often Jade and Beck would have debates. Jade was not afraid to question her boyfriend. If he said something that pissed her off she would say something like "Why did you say that?". If he said something she disagreed with, she would contradict it. Her classic line was "I wasn't wrong. I just didn't understand". He could never argue with that. Sometimes it was complicated. Jade had her own opinions of things and when she was pissed off WATCH OUT. She had learned somewhat to control her temper. It wasn't easy at all for her. Sometimes she said things in anger which she didn't mean. He knew not to challenge her at the time but would discuss it with her after she had calmed down. She wouldn't get upset about things either. Her attitude was, 'well you can't change it so why be upset about it'. Other times she would rip into a person who pissed her off.
When Jade was hurting she would have three reactions. She would have either become hysterical, she would get pissed off or she would become numb. Beck couldn't stand to see her upset. Having been in her shoes before he understood the way that she was feeling but he was also more mature then she was. He had been in the 'game' for longer then she had been. He was 3 days younger then she was but he knew how it worked. He also knew how Jade worked. When he had to leave for a few days he promised her he would be back in exactly 3 days. He kept his promise to her. He kept every promise he made to her. When everyone was looking at him as a hero he made it clear that without Jade he would be nothing. If Jade said something he would always back her up. If someone picked on her he would tell that person off. There were a few times that Beck would tell Jade off too but in a gentle way. Beck always made Jade feel safe.
That's why for Jade, the idea of losing his love was terrifying. She knew he loved her but He was the BEST OF THE BEST. As much as she liked to consider herself Beck's equal she knew the truth. He was far superior to her. The day would come that there difference would be obvious, and what would happen that day? What would he see that day when he looked at her? Would he see the girl he loved or would he see her flaws.
"Jade," he asked cutting into her thoughts, "What are you thinking about?"
"I'm thinking about that day," she admitted
"What day," he asked confused
"The day in the future when our difference are made obvious and clear," she said, "are you still going to see the Jade that I am… or are you going to see my flaws. I have a ton of them."
Beck couldn't help it. He laughed.
"You think I don't know you have flaws? Jade a major part of the reason I love you is BECAUSE of your flaws."
She looked at him confused.
"I thought you hate emotional garbage," she said
"I do," he told her, "But there is nothing about you that is emotional garbage. I have flaws too."
"But you're the best of the best," she said.
"I am," he said, "But I wasn't born knowing how to walk, talk, use the potty and tie my shoes," he said causing her to laugh
"I would imagine you weren't," she said laughing.
"I also wasn't born knowing how to take problems and make them better. I had to learn and guess what? In learning, I made mistakes. I can tell you some of the craziest mistakes I've made. I know you would love the stories."
"I'd like to hear them," she said smiling, "but what are you going to say that day?"
"I'm going to say what I say every day. Jade, I love you. I'm proud to be with you"
"You're proud to be with me?"
"No duh," he said, "Come with me"
She smiled.
"Where are we going," she asked him.
"I think you know," he told her.
"BECK!"
"Sorry babe," he said grinning, "but believe me you'll be glad"
"I'm not glad," Jade joked, "I'm Jade"
He took her hand.
"Well I'm glad that you're Jade," he told her gently.
"You always know the right thing to say," she told him.
He swept her up into his arms and danced with her. In his arms she felt safe. She could be in a garbage dump and she would feel safe with him. It was good to be with him. He sat her down in his lap and wrapped his arms around her.