I hope you enjoy reading murderous!Jo and snarky!Laurie as much as I enjoy writing them. ;)
Title: The Corrections
Fandom: Little Women
Characters/Pairings: Jo/Laurie
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The one in which Jo Laurence is taught a stern lesson by her husband.
"I'm contemplating murdering my publisher," Jo moodily said. "Do you suppose, in the annals of all possible sin, that would make me a truly irredeemable person?"
From his own nest of papers and pencils, Laurie looked up, glad to take any break possible from his attempt to understand absolutely how much had to be spent on costumes for show-girls who demanded enough glitz on their form to make an epileptic elephant stop and shudder.
"How murderous is the murder?" he finally let himself ask. "Are we speaking of garroting or strangulation or a stabbing or—I think I need more details on the details, to be frank."
"It's somewhat bloody," Jo admitted. "I'm still running through all the possibilities of the iron maiden in my head but I haven't discounted a variety of other medieval implements either."
Laurie lowered his ledger, eyebrows now officially askew. Though he had long learned to render unto Caesar what was Caesar's and not interfere in Jo's writing career unless she asked him to, this sounded like serious business.
"Any particular reason why you're putting this man through a mental thresher?" he asked at last, his mouth quirking up at the corners in spite of himself. "If not yet the physical one?"
"Because he's intent on having his way with me," Jo muttered, though before Laurie could get up in high dudgeon, she continued on darkly. "Though not in a physical manner, Teddy—I would let you murder him if he tried such a thing. It's even worse—he's taking advantage of me literarily. I keep trying to kill Theo O'Toole in this new manuscript and every attempt I make—every attempt!—this man insists Theo could rebound from. How, precisely, could anyone—even the most charming detective in the world—rebound from being trampled by a stampede of elephants? Or thrown off a cliff? Or even thrown into an actual thresher?"
Now this he didn't know. Jo had been expanding into writing mysteries as of late, claiming she had been tiring of gothic thrillers and romances and children's novels, though enough had been best-sellers to make their living even more comfortable than his musician's income could bring in. But though it took him a moment to search his memory to recall the character—Jo had so many, all in different forms of development, some published and others still waiting their turn—when comprehension finally hit, Laurie sat up quickly and turned amazed eyes at her.
"But isn't that a character based on me?" Laurie asked, lips twitching as he tried to suppress a smile. "One you said you loved nearly as much as our own children?"
"Well, yes," Jo said, now starting to look a bit guilty. "But—it would be for his own good, believe me. He's a lovely character but he's developed as much as any character possibly could and I'm tiring of male detectives. There's nothing left for him but the great beyond and I'd rather start on a female detective."
"And so, you've decided to resort to murder to get the substitution you want?"
"Well, put that way, it sounds a bit nefarious but—yes. Yes, I just want to tie up some loose ends."
"And this publisher is protesting because the character is… too popular with the people reading your mystery series?"
"So he claims," Jo darkly replied, as though the inviting royalty checks she had received for her recent work had been lies after all.
"And you don't believe him because…?"
"Oh, I do," she said, looking terrifying prim. "I just don't care any longer. I want to have my way on this and make sure no one else can resurrect Theo and write him again once his story is finished. I shan't have any ghouls trampling around my fictional field. What's dead ought to stay dead."
"You make my head hurt sometimes," Laurie had to confess but then smiled. "The wonder of it is how much I like it."
"It'll all work out in the end if I have my way," Jo blithely replied after smiling back at him. "Believe me, I know what I'm doing. If only this twit of a publisher would believe me! Which I suppose goes back to my previous question."
Laurie cocked his eyebrow, grinning. "Which is?"
"Do you suppose I'm a terrible person for wanting—at the very least—this man evaporated into thin air?"
And with that heart-felt plea, Laurie knew just what he needed to do to reassure Jo and show her that her instincts were all for the best.
So he neatly put down his ledgers column, cleared his throat, and solemnly rendered a verdict to a wife direly in need of a lecture from an older man of distinguished education who she could only hope to match in moral correctness—though exceeding his perfection would be too much to ask.
"Yes, Jo, it is terrible—remarkably terrible! Don't you understand that you owe this man everything you have and everything you own—from the words you write to the money you receive to the very breath that now makes you blasphemous? He does nothing but look out for you, and if he has to stifle your artistic freedom in order to have what he wishes from you—who could blame him for such a human conundrum? He would be your mother if your mother had a set of whiskers that would make a sea-lion weep in despair! Every day you spend without kissing his photo contemplatively in the morning and genuflecting before him in thankfulness is a day of waste and sin and utter perdition. Don't you know we are all lost sinners in the eyes of the Lord and thus, must take refuge in the advice of any vaguely paternal father figure that happens to saunter along your path and lecture you on how moral uprightness means doing as he says?"
In the aftermath of his soul-stirring sermon, she looked at him. He looked at her. They looked at one another.
Laurie waited patiently for her to be enlightened and follow his sterling moral example in the manner of small, not-terribly-bright children.
And finally—after letting one of the pillows cushioning her back bounce gaily off Laurie's skull- Jo laughed.
"Right then. I suppose I'll tell the old man that if he won't allow me to write as I wish, I'll shop around with other publishers. I suppose it's a good thing I never let him bind me down with a long-term contract."
"I meant what I said about authority figures," Laurie muttered back, pouting and rubbing his offended brow. "Darling, you're a mere woman and you can't be expected to know very much if you're not in line with your husband's moral authority. Jo, don't you know that fatherly old men who want you to do as they say always know best?"
"Twit," she said, and smiled once more, and went back to writing again.
Author's Note: You know what I honestly love best about Jo and Laurie, besides the fact that they're playful and hilarious and rebellious and wonderfully spontaneous together? The fact that they're equals and have the ability to banter to and fro as they try to decide what to do and how to do it. Neither of them are ever wise and perfect and everything good and glorious in the world (at least before they get married and turn into pod people) and it makes writing them and their conflicts fun, darn it. Jo wouldn't submissively follow Laurie's will and vice versa. I think they would retain their individuality very much after marriage.
And if anyone disagrees, do let me know! I rather relish the idea of getting into a debate about this. ;)
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my first Little Women fic of the summer! I hope it's going to be a productive one for me—I have various one-shots to put up, a little mini-series I hope to finish—and of course, 20 Different Ways to complete!
And so, reviews are a balm upon the soul and I would very much appreciate them. Thanks again.