Author's notes: this is my first attempt at a Gundam Wing fic, so please be kind!! I haven't actually seen any episodes so you're going to have to forgive me since the characters are probably seriously OOC
Warning: umm.. future yaoi, 1x2, and suicidal thoughts. No character death- I don't have the heart to kill any of the characters .
Disclaimer: Meh.. I don't own Gundam Wing.. damnit
!#$%&()
Chapter 1Duo had always watched Heero from afar. It pained him that he would never be able to tell his partner how much he loved him.
I know that Heero would never love me. How could he? For starters, he hates me. Also, I'm a guy, and he's a guy. And that's just not quite... right... Duo thought sorrowfully.
The blade hovered over his skin enticingly, practically shouting at him to use it to cut through the pale patch of skin just like Heero's indifference had cut through his heart, breaking it in two.
Tears slid down his cheeks, and the tip of the blade was barely touching his skin when he heard the front door slam shut. Duo hastily put the knife away and rolled down his sleeves, hiding all the scars that fresh cuts that lined his arms.
No one needs to know. It's not like they care anyway, Duo thought bitterly. Once he had been so content with life, even though he had been fighting a war that seemed almost impossible to win, yet now the war was over, and he was a walking wreck.
Duo wiped away his tears, plastered a fake smile on his face, and walked out of his room. He saw Heero sitting on the couch, typing away at the damned laptop of his.
"Hey Hee-chan!!" Duo sung out cheerfully. He received a grunt in reply.
He doesn't even look at me. Am I that inferior? Am I that unimportant to him?
"What are you doing?" Duo asked, determined to get a full sentence out of the Perfect Soldier.
"What does it look like I'm doing, you idiot?" came the scathing reply.
Not exactly the sentence I wanted to hear, but still a sentence, Duo tried to think optimistically. Who am I trying to kid? He hates me, why else would he criticise me all the time, and ignore me?
"Relena's coming around in a few hours." Heero said abruptly. He shut his laptop swiftly and stashed it away in his bag. "The others will be with her.
"Oh." Duo wasn't how to respond. What was Heero trying to tell him? He already knew the pilot was in love with Relena.
"They want to know if you want to go swimming.
"Oh." Duo said again.
Swimming! he thought happily, before he remembered the long red lines on his wrists. There is no way that I'll be able to go swimming unless I wear something with long sleeves. It's not as if they want me to go swimming with them- why else would they get Heero to ask me? They couldn't be bothered telling me themselves.
"Well?" Heero asked impatiently.
Duo blinked in surprise, slipping out of his dark thoughts. "Pardon? What did you say?
"I said, do you want to go?" Heero repeated, more impatiently than before.
"Umm, no thanks." Duo said uncomfortably.
Heero frowned. "Why not?
"Because I don't feel like swimming. Are you going to go?
"What do you think?" Heero asked, smirking.
"Yes?" Duo guessed, shrugging.
Relena's going to be there, of course he's going to go. He loves her more than anything else in the world.
Heero rolled his eyes and disappeared into his room. Duo stared at him in confusion.
Was that a yes or a no? Damnit, why does Heero have to be so damned confusing?
Duo returned to his room, and cut himself viciously several times, watching unemotionally as blood trickled down his arms, staining his clothes a crimson red.
No one cares about me. No one at all...
!#$%&
Heero wondered why Duo had turned down the offer to go swimming. Now he was stuck with the horrible Relena for hours and there was no Duo to save him from her relentless chattering.
Why did he seem so crestfallen? What's wrong with him? Heero knew that something was bothering his long haired partner, and if something bothered Duo, it bothered him. Why has he been so... secretive for the past days?
Heero frowned. Well, he couldn't really call Duo secretive, exactly, but the amethyst eyed boy was hiding something, that was for certain. Heero knew everything to Duo- he had loved the long haired pilot for as long as he could remember.
Not that I'm going to actually tell him that, of course, Heero thought hastily. He'd just laugh at me in that carefree manner of his, and tease me for the rest of my days. He would never take me seriously.
There was a knock on the door, and Heero groaned. He could practically sense Relena's evil aura on the other side of the door.
"I'll be there in a second! Hang on!" he yelled gruffly, and knocked on Duo's door. He heard mumbled curses and the sound of drawers being slammed shut.
"What do you want?" Duo sounded panicky, Heero thought, frowning. What had he been doing?
"Have you changed your mind?" Heero asked. He didn't want to sound as desperate as he felt.
Duo just has to come to the pool with us, he just has to! Heero thought firmly. I am not going to survive Relena for three whole hours without Duo's jokes.
Duo stuck his head through the door. "I already told you, Hee-chan-" Heero scowled "- that I'm not going.
"If you're sure." Heero said as emotionlessly as always and walked off, slinging his bag over one shoulder. "I'm going.
Duo hesitated for a second.
I suppose I don't actually have to go swimming. I could just sit on the sidelines and watch- as always, Duo thought. He ran after Heero, and caught up with him as he opened the door.
Heero turned and looked at him "So you're coming after all." he commented. He didn't sound the slightest bit surprised or happy.
"Yep!" Duo grinned with all the cheerfulness he could muster. It must've been looked authentic, because Heero grunted and opened the door.
Relena stood there looking absolutely heinous in her customary pink. Heero had to blink several times before the dazzlingly bright colour had stopped blinding him.
"Relena." He muttered in acknowledgement
"Heero!" Relena smiled flirtatiously, and put her arm through Heero's. "Let's go." she didn't even glance at Duo, deeming him not worth her time.
Duo sighed and walked behind them, mulling over his thoughts. If I gather enough courage I could commit suicide tonight, he thought. Most probably they wouldn't even notice that I had gone.
He didn't realise that the others had stopped walking and crashed straight into Heero. He gave a muffled shout of surprise as he fell heavily to the ground, feeling a sharp jolt of pain shoot through his hip.
Heero also fell, but not as heavily. He quickly climbed back to his feet, brushing off his clothes. He fixed Duo with a cold gaze. "Be more careful, Maxwell." was all he said.
Duo felt his cheeks burn a dark crimson. "Sorry about that Heero.
Heero? Heero thought, confused and disappointed. He always calls me Hee-chan. Why Heero all of a sudden? He shook his head and carried on walking. I'm making a mountain out of a molehill.
Relena glared at Duo. "You could've seriously hurt him, you idiot!" she hissed at him.
"I said I was sorry." Duo muttered, slowly getting to his feet. His hip still stung from the impact of the fall.
What's the bet that I'm going to have a large bruise tomorrow? If there is a tomorrow for me, Duo thought.
"Well that's just not good enough." Relena looked as if she was about to start on a long and boring tirade, but Heero cut across her.
"Let's go. The others will be waiting." he said, not even glancing at Duo to see if he was alright.
Duo made sure to keep his distance from the pair, and fixed his gaze on the apartment doors they passed. Finally they reached Heero's car- a large black four wheel drive.
They drove to the pool, where Quatre, Trowa and Wufei awaited them.
"Hey guys!" Quatre grinned at them. "What took you so long?
Relena shot an accusing glare at Duo, who immediately looked away. Heero simply shrugged and walked off to the changing room.
Wufei rolled his eyes. "Nice greeting from the Perfect Soldier. Come on, let's get changed.
They all rushed over to the changing room. Quatre paused at the entrance and peered over his shoulder at Duo quizzically.
"Duo? Aren't you going to get changed?
Duo shook his head, a lopsided grin on his face. "Forgot my swimming togs, silly me." he lied.
"That's alright. I bought a spare pair." Quatre said, and started to dig around in his bag.
"No, it's alright. I don't feel like swimming anyway.
They all frowned. It wasn't like Duo to turn something down, especially not something like swimming. They all knew that Duo loved to swim, heck, the amethyst eyed boy loved any kind of sport!
"You alright?" Wufei asked gruffly.
Duo nodded slowly. "Of course I'm alright." Why would you care if I wasn't? "Why wouldn't I be?
Trowa shrugged, and started to pull Quatre after him into the changing room. As soon as they were inside the changing room, Quatre stopped and turned to his companions.
"I think something's wrong with Duo." Quatre whispered so only his friends could hear him.
"He would tell us if something was wrong." Trowa replied confidently. "You know Duo- he's too open, too caring to keep something from us.
Quatre nodded. "You're right. Duo would never keep anything from his friends.
Duo, who had been eavesdropping outside, gave a soft snort.
How wrong you are.
!#$%&()
Author's notes: Ok, that was horribly short, I know, but I just want to see if you want me to continue or not. If you do please review and I'll give you more, chapters which are at least 10 pages long!! .