Hello, readers!
So I've never written Twilight fanfiction. Ever. Harry Potter under a different pseud, but never Twilight. Be warned that Bella's a little OOC in this fic. Why? Because writing her completely in-character would have probably killed me. This fic starts about two months after Bella goes to visit Jacob in New Moon, post-phase. He doesn't get around Sam's orders and Bella is left in the dark. And left to cope with her grief by herself. Because of this she gets a little reckless and crazy. Eventual J/B, E/B. Edward will come back in later chapters because we all know he can't help himself. A lot of minor characters will be given major roles in this fic because I think that they're more interesting than they're given credit for. Mike Newton, I'm looking at you.
We're probably looking at 15-20 chapters at this point, but that's subject to change. I've written through to chapter 3 so far and plan on (hopefully) updating weekly. Updates will come on either Wednesday nights or Sunday mornings.
Warnings for the entire fic: underage drinking, mature language, violence (of the ~supernatural kind), and some sexual content.
Also, if anybody feels like betaing this baby for me, let me know!
Eric Yorkie talks more than any other person Bella's ever met. She looks up at his face, watching his mouth move but not really hearing the words.
"Uh," Bella says, interrupting Eric mid-sentence. "I have to pee." She stumbles off without waiting for a response, running her hand along the wall to steady herself.
Heels were a bad idea.
Bella kicks them off halfway to the staircase, nearly falling on her face in the process.
"You alright there, Bella?" Giggling, she looks up. Mike Newton is hovering at the foot of the staircase, hands out as if he's ready to catch her at any moment. In her currently inebriated state, it's probably a good idea.
"I'm great," she says, still giggling a little bit. "Amazing, really." He furrows his brow at her and smiles bemusedly.
"Are you headed towards the kitchen? 'Cause I can get you another drink if you just wait here for a second – "
"Rum and coke, please," she says, slurring the last word. She can't believe how classy she feels saying it – rum and coke is a woman's drink, not a girl's. For cocktail parties and New Years' at the Hilton, not trashy high school ragers.
Her breathy giggles just now dying down, Bella leans back against the wall she's been using as support all night, sliding down onto the ground in a big heap. Her dress – Jessica's dress – is so itchy and so tight that Bella wonders if she should take it off. She doesn't like sequins anyways.
She's working the spaghetti straps down her arms when Mike comes back, two cups in his hands.
"Hey, Bella, what are you doing?" he asks, kneeling down in front of her. He brushes her hands off her dress and slides the straps back into place with gentle fingers, that furrow back between his eyebrows. Bella pouts, reaching for the cup closest to her.
"How much have you had to drink?" he asks, pulling the drink away.
"Two or three or four," she says. "And some shots with Eric. I dunno."
"Jesus," he says, voice low. "You're totally trashed right now." He looks upset, the corners of his mouth turned down.
"Are you mad at me?" she asks, the tears already welling up. Bella hates when people are upset with her. Hates it, hates it, hates it.
Jacob's mad, he hasn't talked to you in weeks, why are people always mad at you, why are you always screwing up –
"No," Mike says, placing the drinks on a nearby end table. "I just can't believe that you're drunk. Bella Swan is actually drunk." He laughs. She's not sure she gets the joke, but Bella laughs, too. This party has been so funny.
"Do you have a ride home? You drove here, right?"
She shrugs. "I was gonna stay with Jess."
"I'll take you guys to her place," he says. "I don't think either of you should be driving right now."
"Thanks, Mike," she says. "You're so nice. I always thought you were nice."
"Do you want me to stay with you?" he asks, scooting closer to her.
"No, I'm fine," she says, her head rolling back to hit the wall. Some guy that Jessica had introduced her to earlier – Dan or Dave or Don, something with a D – smiles at her from his place just a few feet away. She waves, wishing she could remember his name.
"Bella, stay with Mike," He says, his voice unbelievably clear and sharp. The noise of the party – the hypnotic beat of too-loud house music mingling with the dozens of people talking amongst themselves, sharing secrets and gossip and whatever else – fades to nothing. Suddenly feeling very, very sober, Bella reaches for one of the drinks that Mike had put down earlier.
"Give me your number," he says, his voice breaking into her thoughts. "I'll text you when I'm heading out, alright? I'll try to find Jess for you."
"Tell him to stay, Bella!" he snarls. He's standing next to Dan-Dave-Don, who's still smiling at her.
Bella ignores him. Almost says she doesn't have a cell phone before remembering the bulky thing Charlie had forced on her last week. He hadn't been able to get ahold of her one too many times and had taken things into his own hands.
"Don't do anything crazy, alright?" Mike says as he helps her up, his phone still in his other hand.
She laughs, his words still ringing in her head. It's almost empowering to watch Mike walk away.
I wish he had stayed.
Bella takes a heavy breath and downs the rest of her drink – Mike went heavy on the rum, and it burns just enough to hurt as she swallows – before heading over to Dan-Dave-Don.
...
Jacob Black has not spoken to her in over two months. 63 days exactly.
She stopped calling on day 26, figuring she'd humiliated herself enough. His point had reached her and the pitying tone Billy used with her every time he picked up the phone instead of Jake had more than started to grate.
The boy who'd called himself her best friend had carved another hole in her chest, this one right next to the last.
Bella still had something left this time, though. She still had his voice.
It fueled her for one week, two. Jessica had been her saving grace.
"Are you guys going to Tyler's party?" she'd asked over lunch, picking at her salad. She always eats all of the croutons first, then starts in on the carrots, tomatoes, and mushrooms. Lettuce is last.
Mike had grunted something that sounded like affirmation before the question registered in Bella's head.
"Yeah," she'd managed, her mind working quickly. A party meant reckless teenagers doing reckless things. A party meant alcohol. Maybe even some marijuana.
Perfect.
"That's great, Bella," Angela had said, smiling with obvious surprise. "Ben and I are going, too."
Bella had called a shockingly amicable Jessica that night to see if they could get ready together. She'd known little to nothing on what proper party attire was.
"Yeah," Jessica'd said. "You can just follow me home tomorrow after school."
And she had. He had appeared no less then three times that night: before each shot that she took – two before she was well and drunk and Jessica had made her stop – and when she'd danced with a friend of Tyler's.
His reaction to alcohol wore off after the second time she'd gone out with Jessica, but he never fails to react to boys. Nice or mean, cute or not – it doesn't matter. She doesn't even have to get that far before he appears. Just thinking about having sex is always enough.
"Fucking cocktease," Daniel – she knew it was a 'D' name – mutters as she gracelessly slides off of him. He looks so angry that it's nearly comical.
"Sorry," she says, already walking out of the bedroom, cell phone in hand. Mike had found Jessica and is heading out. She'd gotten what she came for, regardless. His words are still ringing in the back of her head.
I'm coming.
Her phone makes a funny little beeping noise to let her know that her text has found its way to Mike.
"Bye, Bella," somebody says as she picks up her shoes and starts for the door, voice sing-song-y. Muffled laughter follows.
"Bye," she says, waving in the general direction of the living room. The party is losing momentum – only half the guests remain, most of them sitting on the sofas or out on the patio. She thinks briefly that Andrea has a nice house before walking out, the cool air hitting her like a slap.
Bella's shivering by the time she gets to Mike's car, parked at the end of the street. The heat is, thankfully, on when she slides into the passenger seat, Jess already curled up in the back. Her face softens in such a way that she's beautiful when she sleeps, lashes dusky on her cheeks.
"Hey," Mike says, pulling off of the shoulder and onto the road. His exhaustion is clear even in the dark.
"Hey," Bella says, voice soft. She feels drained. The buzz of alcohol still hums pleasantly in her brain, but it's fading fast.
Maybe I'll actually sleep tonight.
It's always terrible after seeing him, but if she's tired enough and a little drunk –
"Did you have fun, Bells?" The nickname – Jake, Jake, Jake – tugs at her heartstrings and she barely holds back a wince.
"I did, yeah," she says, wrapping her arms around herself. "You?"
"I had an okay time," he says. There's silence for a moment, the emptiness of the road eerie. She shivers, half-expecting to see Victoria out in the middle of the street. Bella isn't sure what happened that day in the woods. Had the wolves somehow managed to destroy Laurent? She's unable to fully comprehend how that's even possible, but with the weeks since she'd nearly been killed slowly ticking by, Bella has trouble coming up with another reason for his absence.
"Are you cold?" he asks, sounding concerned. Although she can't see his face clearly, Bella's sure his eyebrows are pulled together, that furrow back between them. He raises the air before she can answer.
Guilt settles firmly in the pit of her stomach as they drive, an uncomfortable silence settling over them. Bella has never thought that highly of Mike Newton. She wonders what he ever did to deserve her disdain other than like her.
"Why was it only okay?" she asks, curling her legs underneath her. "The party, I mean."
"Oh, I don't know," Mike says. "It's always the same crap with these people. I'm just kind of ready to graduate, I guess. That sounds really shitty, but do you get what I'm saying?" Bella nods as if she has any clue about what he's talking about. She hasn't given a single thought to graduation in months. Her grades are good but Bella hasn't bothered to apply to any colleges. The thought of leaving Forks is too much for her to think about.
"Where are you going next year?" she asks, trying to keep the conversation going.
"U-dub, probably," he says. She can hear the fabric of his shirt moving as he shrugs. "I really wanted to go down to UCLA, but my parents aren't gonna let me go that far…"
Bella's always been bad at small talk, but Mike is easy. He chatters on about his plans for next year with little to no prompting, the occasional "mhm" or "that's cool" enough for him.
They pull up to Jessica's and Bella's actually surprised with how quickly the trip went. Mike really is a cool person.
"Later, Bella," he says as she gets out.
"Thanks so much for driving us," she says. "I'll see you Monday." Jessica's mumbling incoherencies when she manages to pull her out of the car.
"God, I need to throw up," she says, voice low and hoarse. Bella holds her hair back as Jess empties the contents of her stomach out onto the lawn, right into the rose bushes.
"Thanks, boo," Jessica says when she's done. Bella watches her stumble up to the door, fumbling in her tiny purse for the house keys. Bella sways a little, still just the slightest bit tipsy, the cool night air wonderfully refreshing after the heat of Mike's car.
"You coming in or what?" Jess says, standing in the open doorway.
"I'm just going to stand out her for a second," she says. The other girl shrugs before going inside.
Sighing, Bella shuts her eyes. Lets her arms drop to her sides. She shudders when she thinks of him. It had been so vivid tonight, like he'd been right there in the room with her. More vivid than usual.
She's about to head back towards the house when she hears a twig snap. Woods surround most of the houses in Forks, and Jessica's is no exception. Bella turns her head sharply in the direction of the trees.
One second, two –
Snap.
It's unmistakable this time.
She's running before she even thinks about it.