Author's Note: So, this is sort of a Christmas present for my boo, who requested something with Stiles, Lydia, and Derek being adorable together. I was going to write something for this anyway, but here you gooooo! I hope you see Hobbit2: DoS soon, boo!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not even a Tauriel outfit. Which makes me sad. BUT I DO OWN ELF EARS THAT I WORE TO GO SEE HOBBIT, WHICH WAS BALLING, but no one cares about that continue on.
Lydia was going to stop answering her door. She really, really was just going to stop answering the door when there was a knock. Let whoever was out there go away and do whatever they were usually doing when they weren't knocking on her door. She blinked three times before trying to slam the door closed. Stiles stepped up before she could, though.
"Lydia," Stiles said. Lydia didn't even want to process what he was wearing.
"No," she said. "I'm not going anywhere with you dressed like that. I've accepted the plaid, Stiles. I will not accept this."
Stiles pouted like a child, lower lip stuck out. Jackson had made that face whenever he sulked too, only it had looked attractive on Jackson. It literally looked like there was a bratty five year old living in Stiles' almost fully grown body. Which would explain the robe, but couldn't explain the Jeep in her driveway.
"You said you liked Tolkien," Derek pointed out, shoulders slumping. Lydia didn't want to look at what he was wearing, but despite her best efforts her eyes were drawn anyway. She had to admit, at least to herself, that Derek Hale made one damn fine Thorin Oakenshield. He made an even better dwarf than Richard Armitage, actually. Stiles had absolutely nothing on Ian McKellen, because he was easily the least believable Gandalf she'd ever seen.
She could make a guess off the top of her head what kind of outfit was in the bag Stiles was clutching and she wasn't having it. It was one thing to let them bully her into a plaid shirt for Thor 2, but Lydia Martin had her lines in the sand and she wasn't crossing them for love nor money.
"Didn't you two go to the premiere last night," she asked, rolling her eyes. Stiles pouted harder and even Derek looked a little a little sulky around the edges of his furry coat. Where did he even get that kind of furry coat? Where did he get hair extensions like that? Why were these people her friends?
"Dad said I could either go to the midnight premiere of Desolation of Smaug or There And Back Again. Obviously I went with There And Back Again. Which means we're going to the movie in two hours, so put this on and we'll go eat dinner with everyone at the food court."
Lydia looked up at Derek. "Did the Sheriff give you an ultimatum too," she asked sarcastically. Derek hunched his shoulders, looking smaller than she would have thought possible.
"I've gone to enough movies by myself for one lifetime," Derek said quietly.
Lydia cursed violently in her head. "If I told you I had dinner plans tonight with my mother, would that stop you from browbeating me into dressing up in your dorky costume and going to see the movie with you?"
"Only if you weren't lying," Stiles answered truthfully. Lydia sighed and tried to make it look like she found them to be the two most annoying creatures on the planet.
"My mother's out of town for the weekend," she admitted grudgingly. "Give me the bag and don't you dare grin at me, Stilinski, or I will hurt you."
Stiles beamed at her. She resisted the urge to punch him and snatched the bag from his hand, turning to leave the door open so they could follow her in like a couple of geeky strays.
"You're going to need a lot of help with the ears," Stiles said. His tone was so foreboding that Lydia felt a little chill of reflexive panic rocket down her spine. She swallowed, turning to cast a shallow glare over her shoulder.
"Just put on the clothes," Derek said, "and we'll help you with the hair and ears."
"I can do my own hair, Hale. I've been taking care of myself for a long time, you know." The words came out a little bit icier than she had meant to make them. Derek and Stiles never did what she expected them to and it bothered her. They didn't followed any of the equations normal people did, always leaping left when she expect them to go right, always saying no when they're supposed to say yes. They stuck out in the world, bright and loud, Stiles with his flailing limbs and biting sarcasm and Derek with his hunched shoulders and throwaway comments. She hated not knowing what they were going to do next and it was coming out then, throwing itself at Derek's huge coat and Stiles' crooked grey hat.
Derek backed down immediately, a move she guessed he'd learned as a child; submissive, careful and slow, his neck peeking out from his collar and the curtain of dark fake hair. She hated when he backed down like that, because beta or not he was never going to be anything but a predator. She gritted her teeth as he his shoulders tried to brush his ears.
"Sorry," he mumbled. "I used to help my sisters at Halloween and whenever they went to school dances."
Lydia always forgot Derek's family hadn't been just him and Peter. It wasn't something she liked to think about, but she'd seen their house as it had once been. Two people couldn't have lived in such a huge house without going crazy, they would have need life and sound, like the clomp of clumsy child's feet storming up and down the halls, pretending to be princesses and princes, to slay dragons and fight armies. She didn't even know how many people had died in that fire, though by the expression on his face, Stiles probably knew the exact number. She wouldn't be surprised if he knew their names, either. She swallowed, turning to march toward the downstairs bathroom without another word.
She left Derek braid her hair. She tried to put the elf ears on herself, but Stiles had been right; she needed help for that. But in the end the green outfit went nicely with her red hair and Derek's braids were clean and sleek, pulling back the rest of her hair without pressing in on her head. She had to give them that at least; when they put effort into a costume, they went all out.
"You're both horrible people," she hissed at the men walking on either side of her. They were walking through the mall, having picked up their tickets already. They were supposed to meet everyone else in the food court ten minutes before, but Stiles had thrown a fuss about the shoes she had tried to wear and made a detour to pick up a pair of old brown boots that had apparently belonged to his mother. The mall was packed, as always, and people were staring at them as they walked by, trying to point subtly and failing miserably. She felt ridiculous and small, like she had after her run through the woods at the beginning of March. "I am never, ever letting you two talk me into anything like this again," she continued, "so you can absolutely forget about Captain America 2."
"Nope," Stiles said, shaking his head. His grey hat teetered and almost slipped off, but he caught it at the last second.
"We're going to the third movie," Derek continued for him, "and the marathon leading up to it, even if you all have to skip school."
"And we're all going to cry like babies, dude, it's going to be great."
"This much be some meaning of the word great I'm not previous acquainted with," Lydia grumbled under her breath. Derek grinned at her, knocking his elbow into hers.
"It's easier if you just go along with his whims," he mock whispered, "Stiles is like a child; he gets grumpy and huffy when he doesn't get his way." Stiles sputtered on her other side, before loudly declaring that he was through with dwarves and elves and that he was going to spend time with the only one with any real intelligence around there. He then mock stormed off, huffing and puffing his way ahead of them and into the thick of the food court.
A small child watching the scene shrieked in glee. "Mama," he yelped, tugging on his mother's handbag. "Mama, look, it's Thorin, from the Hobbit! And he's got the pretty lady elf with him! Gandalf just stormed away, just like he did in the first one; Mama, look!"
It did not warm her heart and make her feel all wobbly and gooey inside. Absolutely not, Lydia Martin was made of tougher stuff than that. They caught up to Stiles before he could locate the others in the mess of the Friday night crowds and Derek poked him in the side.
"This might have been my idea," Derek admitted, "but Thor 2 was your idea and I got my idea from yours. So technically this is all your fault, wizard."
"Oh god," she said, distracted from their childish squabble. "Please tell me we don't actually know those people."
"GANDALF," Isaac shrieked, hopping up to stand on one of the food court chairs. "OVER HERE, GANDALF, I'VE FOUND THE OTHERS."
Stiles grinned from ear to ear. "GOOD JOB, BILBO," Stiles shouted back, cupping his hands around his mouth, which was mostly hidden by the worst fake white beard Lydia had ever seen.
"No one I know is sane anymore," Lydia muttered, grinning a little bit despite herself. Isaac made a good hobbit she noted as she came closer, his curly blond hair the perfect fit for Bilbo's character. She had no idea where he'd gotten the vest, though it was probably in the same store they'd found Derek's coat, but she liked his blue jacket and the pointy ears that just stuck out of his hair. Beside him were Allison and Scott, the first of which was dressed up as Kili, Thorin's nephew. It was a good fit, though she'd gone with the genderbent version of Kili instead of opting for a beard. Scott was…
"Okay," Lydia said, walking the last five feet to their group. "I honestly cannot remember which dwarf you're supposed to be, McCall."
Scott looked deeply wounded. "I'm Bofur," he said. He tugged on his hat and then again on his fake beard, whining a little under his breath.
Stiles snorted. "Scott, you didn't even read the book," he pointed out, clapping his friend on the shoulder. "Do you know which dwarf Bofur is even related to?"
"Hey," Erica said, narrowing her eyes at Stiles. "No fan bashing here. It doesn't matter if he's only seen the movies." Stiles lifted both hands in the air and made a grimacing face that was probably supposed to convey his willingness to be peaceful about the topic. Derek snorted quietly under his breath.
"Where did you get that make-up," he asked Boyd, sounding a little bit baffled. Boyd, who was wearing a very convincing orc costume, grinned.
"Erica's got a shitton of leftover Halloween stuff," he said, shrugging. "Like it?"
"Yeah," Derek said, grinning back. "It's great. Good job, Legolas."
Erica, who was a genderbent Legolas, preened like a peacock. "Thank you," she purred happily.
"Dude, you're ugly as shit," Stiles hissed, leaning in to touch Boyd's fake hooked nose. "I'm so freaking impressed; you and I are hooking up our talents next year for Halloween, Catwoman."
Boyd growled a little bit and Stiles rolled his eyes. "Down, orc-boy, I wouldn't have a shot in hell with her now. I may be a meddling wizard, but I ain't no elf stealer."
"Why did I agree to this," someone muttered from Lydia's left. She turned and found, to her upmost horror, another dwarf.
"Danny," she said, because there was no one else left. "Please tell me that's not you."
"This isn't me," Danny said dutifully. "I'm merely a figment of your imagination."
Lydia scowled. "I was possessed by a dead guy once, that isn't as funny as it was once."
Danny shrugged. He was wearing a terrible blond wig so that he could be Fili, though he pulled the coat off nicely. "Fair point," he said. "And if you take a picture of this to send to Jackson, know that I'll have to send him pictures of you as well. And I have a few of you and Stiles posing after Thor 2."
Lydia narrowed her eyes at Danny. "You weren't even at Thor 2 with us."
Ethan grinned from over Danny's shoulder, dressed as Dwalin. It looked like he had shaved his head for the costume and someone had scribbled runes under his glue on wig. The dedication was a little much, but she appreciated it anyway. Aiden never would have dressed up with her to go someone with her friends, even if they'd bothered to ask him.
"Danny can do anything," Ethan said happily. Stiles liked to say that Ethan's only redeeming feature was how smitten he was with Danny. Lydia had to say she agreed.
"You should have been an elf," she told Danny, bumping their shoulders together. Stiles called out something about getting food and then dragged Derek off, Isaac on their heels as they made for the Japanese place on the far side of the food court. Ethan dropped a kiss to Danny's cheek, which made Erica squawk loudly about ruined childhoods before Boyd dragged her off to get sandwhiches from Subway. Allison dropped into a chair at a nearby table while Scott went to go get them pizza, leaving Lydia and Danny to join her.
"I tried to be an elf," Danny moaned, "but Stiles threw a massive fit, saying they needed a Fili for their Kili. I tried to tell him he could shove it up his ass and that I'd be Gandalf, but I was overruled. Apparently I'm not meddlesome enough to be a wizard."
"Should I be extremely disappointed the Harry Potter movies are done with and we can't all dress up as wizards," Allison mused, "or should I be thankful."
"Disappointed," Danny answered without missing a beat.
"You're only saying that because you and Jackson went as Draco and Blaine to the sixth and seventh movies," Lydia pointed out. Allison grinned at Danny, leaning forward to prop her elbows on the table.
"Please tell me you have pictures," she giggled. Danny smirked.
"Of course I have pictures," Danny said. "Lydia made a lovely Hermione, even if everyone did mistake her for Ginny."
"Is there anyone in our group that hasn't read the Hobbit," Lydia mused. She didn't really want to continue talking about her Hermione costume in case Derek was listening in with his super hearing. The last thing she needed was those two morons finding out she had done this before they had whirl-winded their ways into her life.
"I haven't, but I know what happens," Danny said. "Ethan hasn't read it either, but he doesn't know any spoilers. He loved the first movie when I showed him, though."
"Scott's never read it," Allison said, grinning. "But other than that I think everyone's read it."
"I haven't," Boyd said, dropping down to the other end of the table. "Erica's told me some stuff, but no spoilers."
"Spoilers, sweetie," Erica shouted across the food court. She was harassing Stiles and Derek for some reason. Lydia blinked for a second, because she could have sworn she knew that reference.
"There are no dwarves in Doctor Who," Isaac shouted back at her. Lydia wondered why they were all shouting, considering they all had super hearing and probably could have whispered to each other across the length of the mall.
Could they whisper to each other across the length of the mall? Would Danny let her borrow Ethan for a while so that she could run experiments on him and Derek? Had Stiles already run these tests and hadn't told her?
"Whatever science thing you're thinking can wait," Stiles said. Derek dropped down on one side of her, carrying two trays, and Stiles sat on the other. Danny gave her a pointed glance between the two as Stiles handed her a bottle of Dr. Pepper and Derek put a tray with her favorite order of Japanese down on the table. Lydia pointedly ignored Danny's pointed look because she liked to pretend she didn't know what he was implying. So what if Derek knew her food order and Stiles knew her favorite kind of soda? That meant nothing.
"I wasn't thinking about science," Lydia denied. "I was thinking about Benedict Cumberbatch playing the voice of Smaug."
"You had on your science face," Derek argued. "You purse your lips and squint your eyes a little bit." Lydia made a noise of annoyance, narrowing her eyes at him. He quickly backpedalled, swallowing thickly. "It's a very nice face, though, very pretty and smart.
Stiles snorted. "Tackless dwarf," he taunted.
Derek opened his mouth to insult Stiles back, but Lydia hushed him with a raised eyebrow. "No fighting at the dinner table," she scolded, trying not to smile.
"You are so fucking regal," Stiles said. "Hottest elf ever."
Lydia smiled a little bit. She wanted to say flattery will get you nowhere, but it felt nice to be noticed. "Thank you, Stiles."
"Stiles wanted to make you a dwarf," Derek said snidely. "He kept insisting you'd make a great Fili."
"Lies," Stiles shrieked. "Slander. I said nothing of the sort."
Lydia sighed. Danny was giving her such a pointed look that she would have had to been blind not to notice it. She tried her best not to notice it anyway. "I'm never going anywhere with you two ever again," she muttered under her breath. Derek smiled at her.
"Whatever you say, Hermione."
Lydia almost spat out her food. Derek chuckled under his breath for the rest of dinner. She still felt awkward in her elven getup, but with "Thorin Oakenshield" on her left side and "Gandalf the Grey" on the other, Lydia felt a little bit like a great elven warrior. She didn't want to look into the reasons why she felt safe between the two, but it didn't really matter to her. Stiles and Derek gave her courage, like she could stroll up and rule the world without breaking a sweat. She hadn't felt like that in a long, long time.