Deep in the jungles of Endor lived many tribes of savage, harry, and short Ewoks. Ever since fire fell from the sky all those years ago, the Ewok tribes had been at war. Fighting each other for power, that they might please the "Golden God" that came all those many years ago. Darkness had spread all over Endor, consuming the best of the chieftains. Many realized it was time to stand up to the communism that had taken over their land. Good against evil, dark against light, the match of rebellion had been sparked. War was coming.
(The following conversations have been translated from Ewok to English for the reader's convenience.)
"It's time for war!" shouted the short, fearless Chieftain, as Ewoks all over the village began jumping and shouting in agreement. The fur-balls began assembling every single rock they could find in preparation.
"Whater all of us gurna da Chief?"
"Well, Ho-Chunk, I plan on surprising them from behind. If we cut through the black forest, we will come out right behind theGayogohonos, Savage Muskogee's tribe."
"Well, I thunk we mus-go-ee-zie on em and have a little furn," said Ho-Chunk as he giggled at his own joke. "When ur we gurna leave?"
"In two moons we will embark," replied Chahta, Chief of the Hualapai tribe.
After two moons of preparation, the Hualapaitribe began their journey to the black forest. The trek was long and tiring- a three moon trip. When the sun went down they stopped and rested, and by the time it rose they were on their way again.
Upon reaching the Black Forest, they came across a Gayogohono outpost. Being the spontaneous creatures they were, theHualapai immediately began yelling and shouting. Rocks and spears began flying everywhere. Suddenly the tree fort burst into flames, prompting the Gayogohono warriors to retreat into the forest.
"Wow, they jurst gut roasted," exclaimed Ho-Chunk.
"Quick, put out the fire, before it burns down the entire forest!" commanded Chahta.
"Burt Chief, its kinder cold out here and it ud be nice if…"
"Huhhh," moaned Chahta in frustration.
"Yers Chief," said Ho-Chunk in compliance.
Three hundred thirteen buckets of water later, the fire was put out. The Hualapai called it a moon and set up camp for the night.
"Well, now the Gayogohonos know we're coming," said Chahta, wondering what their next move would be.
'Who's a gurna care. We can beat em surpise or nay surpise," exclaimed the confident Ewok.
"I hope your right Ho-Chunk," said Chahta, not totally convinced.
The next couple of days theHualapais partied in celebration of their former victory. Upon receiving word that the Gayogohonos were only one moon away, Chahta's tribe began preparing for the inevitable attack.
That night, Chieftain Chahta climbed up on a nearby rock and began to give his inspirational speech,
"Listen my worriers! when the sun rises, the Gayogohonos will be here to try and kill us, but we will defeat them! For the Golden God is on our side!" shouted the fearless Chief, as he raised his spear.
Yells and shouts were herd all throughout the forest.
Awakening to a loud horn, Chief Chahta ran outside to see theGayogohono tribe,led by Neerav, Muskogee's second in command.
"Sound the war horn!" shouted Chahta, as he grabbed his weapon.
At the sound of the horn the entireHualapai tribe began to charge. Short, screaming hairballs were running everywhere. It all escalated so fast that nobody knew what was happening. rocks were flying everywhere. It was so chaotic nobody knew who was on who's side.
Chahta began running at Neerav, screaming. Grunting he raised his club over his head and took a swing at Neerav. but the club slipped out of Chahta's hand. Chahta quickly turned around.
"Ah, you must be the mighty Chief Chahta. Not so mighty anymore." said Neerav, as he put his spear to Chahta's throat. The once mighty chieftain just looked at him in defeat. Chahta was about to be killed when suddenly, a bolder came out of nowhere crushing Neerav.
"That lurked like a smashing experience!" shouted Ho-Chunk as he ran towards his Chief.
"Thank you, Ho-Chunk," said Chahta, as he lifted himself off the ground.
"Dem Gayogohonos er retritten Chief."
"Yes, but the war isn't over yet, they will return," replied Chahta, as he picked up his club and walked away.