Disclaimer: I do not own Harvest Moon, nor its characters.
A/N: This idea popped into my head while waiting for my Spanish class to start. It's a combination of a bunch of 'sad' songs (if you want the Playlist check the end note to this story). Enjoy.
Don't Take His Hand.
Jamie stood before the large oak door and prepared himself for the worse. Beyond these doors was the only person he'd ever allowed to make even the smallest dent in the superficial armor surrounding his whole being, and he could feel her slipping from his grasp. He had waited too long. He had kept her at bay for almost four years, and now that he was ready... he was too late.
He froze as the doors opened, but left out a silent breath of relief. It was only Ellen. He mumbled a hello, carefully to avoid the smiling brunettes questioning glance, and Ellen returned with her own bubbly greeting. She looked utterly confused, but didn't pester Jamie with questions, of which he wouldn't have answered properly anyways, and walked away. His azure eyes bounced between watching Ellen leave, the oak door, and back to Ellen as she disappeared behind a white pillar. He shook his head, balled his fists, and knocked, softly, against the door. It creaked from the contact and opened about an inch from the force. He heard her voice, still the soft and sweet tone that had been replaying in his mind, beckoning him to enter.
Jamie did enter and all at once, he felt himself become mesmerized. She looked beautiful. She sat in front of a large mirror, her hands busy working out the last imperfection on her veil and dressed in a traditional white dress. Her back was towards him and she stared at him from the mirror, a small smile played on her lips. He regretted ever agreeing to come now. Seeing her like this made something inside him ache. It hurt to know she had chosen another, but he couldn't blame her. He was to blame for not letting her know. No, now she was going to be married to some second rate farmer.
What was so special about him? He was twice the farmer Blue could ever wish to be. He had better crops. His animals placed better in competitions. He could have been a better husband, a better father... His eyes briefly dropped to her stomach, the bump was beginning to become visible, hence the hasty wedding. He suddenly felt sick. How could she have chosen Blue over him? What was he missing that Blue miraculously filled? She should have been marrying him. They should have been the ones having the wedding today, not her and Blue.
She turned her head towards Jamie, a concerned look plagued her face. "What's wrong?"
He shook his head. She smiled, he forced his own smile, and she returned to the fussy veil. Her distraction gave him time to really look her over. She had really grown up the last four years, both physically and mentally. From inexperienced city girl to full fledge garden nymph and a stunning, well rounded adult. He noticed she wasn't wearing her hair in her signature pigtails, instead it was loose, long, and wave like the ocean. It was a good look for her he decided instantly.
She suddenly stood and fully turned towards him. That damn smile still played on her lips and he moved forward, closing the unbearable gap between them. "Jamie, I'm so glad you could come. It really means a lot to me."
He gave her a confused look and she grinned, bringing the back of her palm to her lips before giggling softly. His chest tightened at the sound and in the back of his mind he wondered if Blue could make her giggle like that. Probably not, or at least he decided to believe not, and it boosted his ego. She would never know, but he always noticed the little unique quirks and memorized a majority of them. The way she would stand, one leg always crossing the other. The way she would keep track of things, mumbled under her breath once and the given odd nicknames to remember. How she would always laugh to break the tension and how her eyes would gloss when she was on the verge of tears, but refused to let them fall. He knew her. He understood her. But it didn't matter now.
She brushed away a loose strand of hair. "It does, Jamie. More that you'll ever know."
"Why?" He whispered.
There was a double meaning to his question, but he was sure she would never catch it. He did want to know why it meant so much for him to be there. He also wanted to know why Blue. Why couldn't she had waited just a little longer. A week at most, why could she had given him just one more week.
"Well," she elongated the last vowel and began playing with the hem of the veil. Her brown eyes fall to her hands and quickly return, staring into him azure orbs. "If it wasn't for you, I would have never met Blue."
His body stiffened.
If it wasn't for him. She would have. Never. Met. Blue. It took him a second to long to regain his composure, or at least to relax his mouth enough to speak. "W-what?"
"Yeah. The first year I was here, you always beat me in everything. Whether it was shipping crops and gems or competing in the festivals, you were always better." She paused momentarily, a dreamy smile growing. "So, I asked if Blue could teach me some pointer the middle of the second year. It took some persuading, but he eventually agreed. It started off as a once a week type deal, but eventually, over the seasons, it grew until eventually we were spending almost every day together."
His jaw clenched. It was his fault. He pushed her to seek out someone else. If he wouldn't have acted like a complete jerk and show off their first years...neither of them would be here. She would have been his. He would have been happy. Blue nowhere in sight. They would have been together. But they weren't, they never would.
"Jamie?" Her hand rested on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"
No. He wasn't. He was angry, destroyed, humiliated, and completely lost all in one. "I-" He couldn't form the correct words and he finally noticed just how close she had moved. She was less than arms length away, her sweet perfume attacked his senses, and he couldn't hold back anymore. His arms were instantly around her, one against the small of her back and the other behind her head.
She gasped and struggled to push him away. But Jamie was far too lost in her lips. They were softer than he had imagined and tasted a bit like strawberries. His arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer. He knew this was wrong, she might hate him, slap him, scream bloody murder when they pulled apart, but for the moment he enjoyed it. He enjoyed how her hands clutched the generic suit and how warm her body felt pressed against his. He had to breath, it was inevitable, so he began to pull back. What surprised him was how she leaned in, almost unwilling to separate her lips from his.
They parted. He prepared himself to her screams, but she remained quiet for the most part. A shocked look was painted on her face, her lips were wet and were beginning to swell. She was flushed, most likely from embarrassment or anger, and she still stayed quiet.
Jaime continued to hold her and he could have sworn he felt her heart beating, wildly, in her chest.
She eyes fell away from him and finally spoke. "W-why?"
He seemed to be chocking on his own words. It was too late, and yet he had still decided to ignore his better judgment, possible jeopardized more than just his reputation. If someone where to walk in and find them in the compromising position, it would be the scandal of the village for years to come. He pulled away and took small steps backwards. If he hadn't had kept his eyes on her, he would have missed that hurt look.
He avoided those big brown orbs and stared at the ground. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"
"'Didn't mean to.'" She cut in. He looked back at her and watched as she clenched her fists and her eyes dropped in sadness.
Jamie frowned, angry at himself for beginning to push her away and possibly destroying the small thread linking them together. He stepped back in front of her, determined to let her know. Taking her fists into his hands, he held them against his chest and pulled her closer. "No, ...I want you to be with me. I-I love you."
Playlist
Adam Lambert - 'Whatya Want From Me'
Tae Yang - 'Wedding Dress'