The Banana Slug: Like I said before, Prof. Pyg doesn't get the respect he deserves. I like the character of Lazlo Valentin, the sole fanfic of him is in one of my favorites list!
So, in honor of the bastard mind-child of Grant Morrison, here is a long one-shot YJ fanfic starring said villain.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Young Justice or Professor Pyg, both belong to DC Comics, Greg Weisman, Grant Morrison, and Cartoon Network. I do not own any of this. Please, this is fanfiction. I own nothing.
P.S. Excuse me for not using the same time telling technique Young Justice uses, it's too complicated for my tiny lizard brain.
Young Justice
BAD OPERATION
By The Banana Slug
"…Bad…"
A man awoke in a dark room, with many dark figures looking down at him. He attempted to struggle, but could not move. He was strapped to an operating table, completely immobilized. He was suddenly blinded by a bright light, his vision returning shortly. He looked around to see what the dark figures were. They had lithe forms, wearing fuchsia dresses that ended just below their thighs.
"Bad!"
The figures had some sort of leather for skin, and their hands had long sharp knives for fingers. What stood out was their faces. They had styled red hair, with a black headband keeping it fine, and they all wore the same mask. It was a white porcelain face with creepy yet delightful smiles over their mouths. And finally, eyeholes with peering white eyes looking at him, dead white eyes.
He began to scream loudly, thrashing about in panic. The creatures only giggled like preteen girls as they watched him, thinking his struggling funny. Suddenly, a loud groan was heard from far away. The man saw a disgusting beast before him, waddling towards him with saliva dripping down his mouth, gnawing his teeth and thrashing his fat gross tongue around.
"Mmgh! Ugh!"
The man watched his leather gloved hands reach out and press the fingers against his face. The man was dead silent, not making a sound as he trembled in fear.
"…Mmmn…Grgh!" gurgled the beast, "I think you need…"
The man hyperventilated as the beast moved his head closer, the beast's pig nose pressing against the man's lips, white eyes peering from the pink mask at the man's hopeless eyes.
"You need…a bad…operation! Ugh!" grunted the beast, who stepped back and was handed an electric bonesaw by one of the creatures. With a disgusting grin, dripping with slobber, the saw revved and screamed.
The man could only scream, as he was given…a bad operation…
MOUNT JUSTICE
September 29, 2:04 PM
In the cave, Superboy was in the kitchen making a sandwich as Robin and Kid Flash were playing Finger Football. Kid Flash was holding up his fingers as Robin prepared the shot, then releasing the paper football and hitting Wally in the chest.
"Nice, three in a row!" congratulated Kid Flash, clapping his hands.
"Let's tally the score, three to three?" laughed Robin.
"Best four out of five?" egged Wally.
"Damn right!" said Dick with a smirk. As the two were laughing, Aqualad and Miss Martian walked into the room, carrying electronic pads.
"So what are we looking for, Aqualad?" asked Miss Martian.
"We need to find out what exactly was that…thing Black Manta wanted," explained Aqualand, "I have a strange feeling it will appear later in our future. I was given schematics of the echinoderm research from the Science Center."
From the Zeta-Beam, was heard, "Recognized, Batman, 02", along with a flash of light. As was expected, the Dark Knight walked out of the light to his teammates, who walked towards him.
"Team, I have a mission that…I hope you can handle," explained Batman.
"What do you mean?" replied Miss Martian.
"I currently have my hands full with the Scarecrow, having escaped Arkham just about a week ago, and I think I have a lead to his location," explained Batman, only to be interrupted by Kid Flash.
"Ah! So you need our help to bag the freak, hm?" laughed Kid Flash.
"No, I can handle Scarecrow on my own," responded Batman, crushing Kid Flash's ego (by a bit), "What I need you and your team to do is find another criminal who has been in Gotham for ten weeks, he has been quiet for eight of those weeks, but has recently been acting up again."
"It's Lazlo, isn't it?" realized Robin, slightly frowning and feeling a dark feeling in his stomach at the realization.
"Correct, Valentin escaped from Arkham in July, I expected him to start his 'activities' right after he escaped from Arkham," explained Batman, "However, I was surprised at his lack of commotion…that ended when a Gotham citizen was found in the wharf…transformed."
"Transformed?" inquired Superboy, confused by the statement.
"Robin will explain when you get to the GCPD, Miss Martian could possibly scan the man's mind and find a clue to Lazlo's location," continued Batman, "Artemis was already notified by Green Arrow, she should meet you in the GCPD when you get there. Once you get any information on Lazlo Valentin, find him and take. Him. Down. Understood?"
"Understood," replied Robin, nodding quickly. Batman nodded back and re-entered the Zeta-Beam and left the team by themselves.
"Robin, who's Lazlo?" let out Miss Martian, obviously disturbed by the serious behavior of Batman and Robin.
Robin only glanced at her, pausing slightly before giving a sigh. "I'll…explain in the ship. We don't have time to lose, guys. Let's go."
They watched Robin walk out to the hanger, Aqualad disturbed by his actions. "This Lazlo character must be truly a devastating force," he added in, "Or an aberration of nauseating levels…"
GOTHAM CITY
September 29, 2:05 PM EST
Artemis was walking down the rooftops, jumping to the others as she was lost in thought. Thinking about her family and her past, which was broken by the screams of terror. She looked to the direction and quickly rushed to it. She looked down the alleyway and saw a man being attacked by the creatures, their doll-faces blank and emotionless as they giggled and yanked his arms.
"No! Get away! No! Help!" he screamed, tears running down his face as they began dragging him away.
"On it's way," she muttered, grabbing her bow and shooting an arrow right at one of the creatures, knocking it down on the ground as the other released the man in 'surprise'. The man quickly ran away in fright, hiding behind a garbage can.
Artemis jumped from the walls of the alleyway, getting leverage as she landed in front of the two dolls. She pointed her arrow at both of them, glaring at the abominations as they 'smiled' at her, bobbing their heads playfully.
"Alright, you gross zombie freaks!" she growled, "Where's your boss? Tell me where he is!"
The only response she got was laughter, clasping their clawed hands to the mouth of their masks and releasing girlish giggles. She shot another arrow at the head of one of the dolls, knocking it down yet not stopping the giggling.
"Where is the Pyg!" she shouted angrily. Her anger subsided as she felt goosebumps on her neck as a hot breath was pounding against it.
"Sweetie…I'm home…can I have a kisssssss…"
She quickly turned around, only to be smacked in the face with a piece of wood. She yelled as she fell on the ground, a large bruise already forming as the world began to get less clear.
The last thing she saw before she fell under was a large boot coming at her face, kicking her right on her nose…
EASTERN COAST
September 29, 2:14 PM
Everyone was silent, with Robin standing directly at the window, looking at the way to Gotham. He impatiently tapped his foot and rubbed his wrists.
Miss Martian looked at Superboy, who glanced at her for a moment before looking away. She knew something was troubling Robin, and he has yet to tell them of this "Lazlo Valentin" character.
"Robin…you didn't tell us who…Lazlo Valentin is," said Miss Martian, looking directly at him.
"Yeah, what's with the cold shoulder?" asked Superboy.
"…Sorry, I forgot, I was just so concerned of getting there I…forgot," replied Robin, turning back to them and walking to Miss Martian's chair. She looked at him as he typed on the keyboard, "Professor Pyg".
The onboard computer showed the image of a obese and disgusting man's police photo. His eyes were sunken, his chin was almost non-existant, drool was dribbling from his lips, and his hair was partially bald with remains of bangs flowing down his forehead.
"This is Lazlo Valentin, peeps call him Professor Pyg," introduced Robin.
"Wait, THAT'S Professor Pyg?" let out Kid Flash in surprise, he slapped his hand on the side of his head, "Damn! So Lazlo's the guys real name?"
"Right on the money," remarked Robin.
"Wait, who's Professor Pyg?" questioned a confused Miss Martian.
"Professor Pyg, a schizophrenic and incredibly dangerous psychopath," explained Aqualad, also hearing of Professor Pyg, "A deranged beast that should've been put down years ago."
"This guy?" scoffed Superboy, "He's just some fat freak with a bad comb over. He reminds me of some dumb pedophile than a deranged beast!"
"Yeah, you don't know what he does," continued Robin, "What he does is kidnap people, perform this 'sturbed surgery on them, and turns them into zombies. Super-strong and super-creepy. Not to mention the man has hundreds of these zombs around Gotham unaccounted for."
Superboy looked at Robin, obviously disturbed by this. Miss Martian glanced away, then turning back to Robin and asked, "What do you mean…surgery?"
"Not really sure," replied Robin, crossing his arms, "But it involves brain surgery, genital mutilation, and mind-altering drugs. He…affectionately…calls them Dollotrons." Miss Martians hid her fear, then brushing her hair and looking away in disgust.
"How can…ANYONE do such a thing," let out Miss Martian, covering her mouth.
"Easy," replied Robin, "He's nuts."
Artemis awoke in a surgical bed, strapped down as a light instantly shown down her, almost blinding her. She looked around to see a figure at a nearby table, apparently working on something. She heard the sound of a man groaning and gurgling, a women gasping and moaning in pain, and the sound of meat being cut and squished.
"Pyg!" she yelled out angrily, "Let me out before I seriously mess you up!"
"The…box…the box…the despair pit, he said…" groaned the man in possible pain, "In the corner, the inside went on…forever…"
Then noticing Artemis, he looked at her and put his bloody surgical tools on the table next to the bed. He walked over to Artemis, revealing the Professor Pyg to her.
He was large, fat, and incredibly pale, with zits and sores covering his skin. He wore a bloody white apron, long black leather gloves, black galoshes, and the only conventional clothing he wore was a pair of short red boxers. Finally, he wore a pink pig mask, plastic and cracked. His white eyes looked at her body, his slobbering and the licking of his chops disturbed Artemis.
"Look who's eager to be…perfect!" grumbled Pyg, walking over to her and slamming his hands on the table next to her body, "Did you know of the false-existence? The false-existence that holds all people? It shows when you least expect it!"
"Let. Me. Go." demanded Artemis, glaring at the freak.
"It happens to everyone," continued Professor Pyg with his rant, "When you wonder how people can exist if YOU exist! How can people be around when you are conscious? It! Doesn't! Make! Sense! You are you! And if that is true! How can you be sure? If you exist?"
He sighed and stared at Artemis' navel, losing concentration for a long while before looking back at her. "Do you know if you exist? How can you, you're not perfect."
"Shut! Up!" yelled Artemis with a cracked voice, struggling wildly, "Let me go! And I won't friggin' kill you, you sick freak! Do you hear me?"
"I hear you, and it only makes me love you more!" laughed Pyg, grabbing a scalpel and pressing the blunt side against her arm. He rubbed the cold steel against it as she looked at it with fear, but she would damn well not let him see it. Pyg walked back and clapped his hands together twice, tapping his foot slightly. His creatures, his Dollotrons, quickly ran to him with an operating table full of surgical tools at his disposal. He grabbed a buzz saw and sighed happily.
"Did I ever tell you on Monday, she's Mormo, formless chaos!" he rambled, turning it on to Artemis' horror, swinging it around playfully, "On Tuesday it's Tiamat this and Tiamat that! Tohu va buhu and boo-hoo-hoo!"
"Yeah…that's nice…" growled Artemis, hiding her fear, "Now shut up! And let me go!"
"My dear…I need to make you perfect!" grumbled Professor Pyg, grabbing a bottle of painkillers and chugging them as if it were a drink, then spurting out, "Only I can do it. Your savior…your…messiah." He looked over and saw his other patient letting out weak yells and letting out, "Help…Me!", over and over again.
"Oh, it seems I need to work on this little trotter a bit more," grunted Pyg, dropping the saw on the floor and grabbing a syringe full of sedatives, "Nighty-night, my little cupcake! Dream of fallen gods and children of zoophiles."
"No! Help! Help!" she screamed out in fear and anger, thrashing about as she felt the needle enter her arm. She continued to thrash about and keep her voice heard as she was going under, her vision going under again. Thankfully, it wasn't too violent this time.
GOTHAM CITY
September 29, 2:55 PM
The Team entered the GCPD, greeted by Commissioner Gordon, nodding to Robin. He nodded back with respect."Commissioner, it's good to see you again," greeted Robin with a smile.
"Same here, kid," replied Gordon, "But I know that you aren't here to say hello to a friend. You're here for the Pyg."
"Correct," replied Aqualad, "Batman said you had one of the Dollotrons in custody."
"Yeah, some guys working at the wharf found the creature," explained Gordon, visibly disturbed by the description, "Gave one of the guys a fright as it tried to get them, but they managed to beat it to submission and restrain it for us to come and pick it up. I heard that one of you could find it with that EMP crap."
"It's not crap," replied Miss Martian, slightly offended, "And if this Professor Pyg IS controlling them, they may be linked to him some way."
"Possible, his friend in Arkham was Jervis Tetch," replied Gordon, scratching the back of his head, "It's either technological, psychological, medical, or hopefully not, mystical."
Kid Flash looked around the GCPD, looking for Artemis. She was supposed to meet them as Batman said, but she was nowhere to be seen. He had no idea what hell she was in right now.
"Hey, Gordon, seen a foxy lady 'round here?' asked Wally, "Blonde, hot, wearing a delectable green costume?"
"Not that I could say, kid," replied Gordon shaking his head slightly at his weird attitude, "But Batman said that someone was suppose to be here that was suppose to be in your team. Yet, she hasn't showed up here at all today. She could be on her way."
"It's okay, take us to the Dollotron," said Robin, "We're ready to interrogate it." Gordon nodded and led them through the police station.
"Any idea where Artemis is at?" asked Kid Flash mentally.
"No, M'gann, can you get a track on her?" Aqualad asked Miss Martian.
"No, she's out of range, I think," she replied, "It's strange though, I'm sure if she wasn't here NOW, she'd be just getting in. Our ship wasn't that hard to miss, she had to see it."
"Great, I got TWO things to worry 'bout," sighed Robin, shaking his head slightly in disappointment.
In the interrogation room, the Dollotron sat at the desk, twiddling it's finger's around. Suddenly, it was slapped across the face, an action it quickly healed from. From the other side was Detective Harvey Bullock and Detective Renee Montoya.
"Alright, ya fuckin' zombie!" yelled Harvey angrily, slamming his hands on the table, "Where's the Pyg? Don't you go silent on me! You think this is some kinda fucking joke? Talk, dammit!"
He slapped the Dollotron again, and again, and again. The fourth time, Renee held him back, yelling, "It's no use, Bullock! You'll kill it! And we won't get nothing on it just by beating the crap out of it! So calm the hell down!"
Harvey breathed heavily, glaring at the smiling abomination. He took a deep breath and calmed down, looking at Renee. "Thanks, pal," he thanked, "You're right. I'll calm down."
As he said that, Robin, Aqualad, and Miss Martian walked into the room. Harvey growled and threw his hands up in the air, "Great! The stupid Bat sends bed-wetters for help!"
"What did we talk about?" yelled Renee.
"I know! But we have a sick sadistic hypersexual fatso runnin' 'round turnin' people into zombies and Bats thinks it's so important to send his brats!" he ranted, then stopping and rubbing snot from his nose with his sleeve.
"…Ya done?" asked Robin with a taunting smile. Harvey glared at him and cursed silently as he walked out the room. Renee walked with him, but gave a wink at Robin and a soft smirk. Robin smirked back as he watched the two walk out.
"What's his problem?" asked a slightly offended Miss Martian.
"He's Harvey Bullock," added Robin.
"Yeah, but what's his problem?" asked M'gann again.
"I believe him being Harvey Bullock is the problem," joked Aqualad, Robin released a laugh as they walked to the desk, facing the Dollotron.
On the other side of the one-sided mirror was Kid Flash and Superboy. Connor shook his head as Kid Flash looked down.
"You alright?" asked Superboy.
"Yeah…It's just…Artemis has been gone for some time, right?" replied Kid Flash.
"Yeah," replied Superboy, watching Robin and the others talk to each other as the Doll looked at them.
"…You think she's alright?" asked Kid Flash.
"Don't know," replied Superboy. Kid Flash sighed and crossed his arms, tapping his foot impatiently.
They watched Robin and Aqualad part as Miss Martian sat across the Dollotron, which looked at her with a tilt of it's head.
"Okay, so…all I have to do is look into it's mind and find anything of importance?" M'gann asked Robin.
"Yeah, be careful, N-U-T-S have real hard knocks…so Martian Manhunter told me," replied Robin, giving a shy smirk.
"Just try your best," encouraged Aqualad, putting his hand on her shoulder. M'gann nodded and smiled, then stared at the Dollotron. It stared back carelessly as Miss Martian probed it's mind. She saw a dirty apartment, heard loud music, and felt cold. The man was scratching his arm, creating scabs as one friend was patting his shoulder. They both were crying.
She then saw him inject something into his arm, a tube constricting the arm. She felt…strange. She skipped that part quickly. She then saw him talking to someone on the phone, yet couldn't hear who it is.
"Miss Martian?" let out Aqualad.
"His mind…it's heavily damaged," she said, still probing his mind, "I can gather he was a meth addict, he had a friend, he was…talking to someone on the phone and…wait…I got something…"
She saw a large door to a giant warehouse, and began knocking on the door. The warehouse was in a gravelly area, with WayneCorps tower overlooking from a mile away, and a row of decrepit buildings at the left. The streets name was, "Holding Way" and a sign on the warehouse was "Pepper and Chips".
The door quickly opened and the hands of a fat man grabbed him and dragged him inside. The man screamed as his friend was being attacked from the outside, Dollotrons piling on him.
Finally, she saw herself on the table, the Professor Pyg standing over her. She felt empty…she felt nothing…she felt as if she didn't care if she existed.
"M'gann! M'gann!" yelled a voice, she woke up and saw Superboy grabbing her arms. He looked worried, then sighed in relief.
"What…happened?" asked Miss Martian.
"You were giggling," replied Robin, "Giggling like a…little girl…like a Dollotron." He then pointed at the Dollotron, which had it's head on the table. It was dead.
"What…" let out Miss Martian.
"It just…died," replied Kid Flash, "As you giggled, it was dying, groaning in pain."
"Oh…" she let out, she shook her head and said, "It was dead already, like you said, a zombie. Listen, I know where Pyg is…or was. A warehouse, in "Holding Way", it has a sign, "Pepper and Chips"."
"M'gann! You're 'tastic!" laughed Robin. Miss Martian smiled softly and shrugged.
"Oh, just bein' Megan!" she laughed. Suddenly, Gordon entered the room with a huff.
"We got some druggie out saying he knows where the Pyg is," said Gordon quickly.
"So do we," replied Aqualad, "Miss Martian…"
"Nah, that's not all!" added Gordon loudly, "He says…you gotta listen! Come!" He ran out, the Team quickly looked at each other and did as the Commissioner said.
"Alright! Calm down, ya spaz!" yelled Bullock, "We don't need you wiggin' out in our department!"
"But! No! I know where the Pyg is! I know where the Pyg is!" shouted the man, the officers not sure if he was high or scared, "He took my friend! He killed him! The bastard killed him! And let me live!"
As the Team walked out, Miss Martian gasped at the sight of the man. He was the one from the visions, he was the friend of the deceased Dollotron.
"He took your friend when you went to the warehouse, right?" interrogated Miss Martian, "Pyg took your friend, right?"
The druggie shook and looked at Miss Martian. He let out a nervous laugh and picked his face as he shivered. "Yuh-yeah! Man, we-we got a phone call and…we was jonesin', man! He said, he said, that some guy could hook us up with some…mega drug, man! He said we'd get wasted beyond comprehension!"
"A dead end, great!" growled Superboy.
"Nah! Nah! It wasn't Pyg!" shouted the man, being restrained by Bullock, "He! He was some other guy, don't know who! But when we got there, Pyg came out and took my buddy, and those zombies, man, those zombies grabbed me! They just 'ttacked me!"
"I know, I read your friends mind," replied Miss Martian, the sighed and said with great concern, "I'm sorry, he's gone."
"I…I…I know, I know he's dead," sighed the man, then scratching his face, "He said…he wouldn't turn him…if I did as he said…but he lied…and he tried to zombie me too…so I ran here."
"What did he make you do!" interrogated Aqualad sternly.
The addict sighed and began to cry. "I…I came here to turn myself in, man! I did something real bad, man! Real! Bad!"
"Tell! Us!" demanded Superboy, scaring the man.
"I…he told me to meet some dolls at an alleyway! He didn't tell me why," explained the man, nervous as hell, "They began tugging me! Then, that…that Arrow lady with Green Arrow showed up!"
"Artemis!" yelled out Kid Flash in surprise. The Team began looking around in shock.
"You need to tell us what happened!" demanded Miss Martian.
"He took her! He hit her in the head and kicked her face! I ran… I ran away! I knew he was gonna turn me! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" he cried, sobbing loudly, "I just needed the pain to go away! He said the pain would go away! Oh, god forgive me!" He fell on the ground, sobbing incredibly, as if asking their forgiveness. Harvey sighed and picked him up, with Renee helping him in taking the man away to holding. Miss Martian couldn't help but feel sorry for that man. He lost his pride, his sanity, and his best friend, all in one day.
"We need to get to the warehouse now!" ordered Aqualad.
"I'll meet you there!" growled Kid Flash, rushing through the doors with his super speed. The Team quickly exited the building to their bioship, knowing time was in the essence.
Artemis awoke when a hard object was hit on her stomach, gasping for the air that was blown from her lungs. She looked to see Professor Pyg with a bat, slapping it against his hands.
"Wakey-wakey, no kisses for Sleeping Ugly!" snorted Pyg, "It is time for the ball! The ball in Heaven with the Saint of Killers! Sitting on the throne of angel skeletons and the naked corpse of God!"
"Do you ever SHUT THE FUCK UP!" she screamed, "I get out of this and you are dead!"
She shuddered when the Dollotrons brought in the table full of surgical equipment.
"Look! I am Green Arrows niece!" she yelled, "You kill me! He's going to hunt! You! Down! Is any of this going through that crap-brain of yours?"
"I accept the truth!" added Professor Pyg, "Not lies!"
"How did you…" let out Artemis.
"I am part of the worms that feed on good people's carcasses," grumbled Professor Pyg, "I know all the other worms that feed, and while they may run from my girth and virility, I still chase after them!"'
The Pyg stopped and fell on his knees, gagging repeatedly. Suddenly, a faint voice was heard in the distance, saying, "You can do better. You can do better."
"No! No! Mommy! Mommy Made of Nails! Stop it!" pleaded Professor Pyg, looking to the right. Artemis looked to see some bizarre contraption with a Dollotron face at the top, it was four long wooden sticks wrapped around in barbed wire.
"You can do better. You can do better. You can do better. You can do better."
"Why do you hate me! I make everyone love me!" sobbed Professor Pyg, crawling to the Mommy Made of Nails, "Nothing is good enough for you, mommy! Nothings ever good enough! Ugh!"
Artemis watched with disgust as the Pyg sobbed and his Dollotrons ran to him and held him up, patting his back.
"I like…music…" grunted Professor Pyg, "Pyggie needs to work to music! Sexy Disco Hot!" A Dollotron ran to a stereo in the corner and turned it on, playing a distorted pop song. Professor Pyg began swaying his hips sensually, turning around and swaying his rear to Artemis as he played with the waistband of his boxers. Artemis tried to look away disgusted by this freak.
"Imagine…you're a girl! At a dance!" rambled Professor Pyg, dancing sensually and slowly, moving his hips and touching his chest, "And you meet this guy! Well read! Good looks except…except…feet! His feet are pig's trotters! Uh!"
He looked at Artemis and saw her try not to make eye contact with him, visibly disgusted by the schizophrenic. Pyg rushed to her and rubbed his chest against her arm. "Now what's wrong?" he groaned in pain, "You look at me like I'm out of shape! Like I drank too much and forgot my medicine! Is! That! It?"
He screamed as he threw his apron off, revealing more of his disgusting fat body, covered in acne and bedsores. He screamed so loud that he didn't even hear the door opening from the outside, no one did.
"I AM AN ARTIST!" he screamed as he fell on his knees in front of Artemis, "Who can expect me to work on anti-psychotics? I HATE THIS MUSIC!"
He reached out and touched Artemis' stomach, rubbing it and making her want to vomit. She seriously hoped he wasn't thinking what she thought he was thinking. Then again, who could? He rested his head on her belly and moaned out as he rubbed his head on it, "Oink! Oinkety! Oinkety! …Oink!"
Much to her relief, he fell on the ground, spitting massive amounts of spit out his mouth. He sobbed as he said, "I wanna be sick…I wanna…operate…I wanna be sick…in front of…EVERYONE!"
He slowly got up after spitting out what seems to be a pint of saliva, the Dollotrons wiped his mouth gently as he grabbed a drill. "Okay…I'm ready…I just needed to calm down…"
"Y'know what?" said a voice behind him. He quickly turned around and saw Kid Flash glaring at Pyg.
"You just redefine wrong," and with that, Kid Flash gave a swift punch in Professor Pyg's fat face, sending him to his Dollotrons.
"What took you so long!" yelled Artemis, "I thought this freak was going to rape me!"
"No, just turn you into a zombie! No big!" replied Kid Flash as he rushed to her and began undoing the straps in superspeed.
"Yeah! No big!" yelled Artemis angrily as she jumped off.
"Get! Them!" groaned Professor Pyg, pointing at the two young members. The Dollotrons moaned as they rushed to them, their clawed hands reaching out at them. Artemis pulled the bed she was and caused the crowd to trip on the bed. She looked around and saw her bow and quiver of arrows near the stairs. She rushed to them quickly, only to be jumped on by Dollotrons from the higher level.
She growled and screamed as she kicked and punched them, quickly being overpowered by the numbers. After Kid Flash gave a Dollotron a kick to the face, and then he saw Artemis in peril.
"Artemis!" he yelled out, not noticing the Dollotrons running to him and grabbing his arms and legs, restraining him.
"Let go, you undead sons of bitches!" yelled Kid Flash, he was then hit in the stomach by a baseball bat, causing him to gag and almost throw up. He looked up at Professor Pyg, looking down at him.
"I…am seriously…going to kick your fat ass!" hissed Kid Flash.
"Not beautiful ol' me!" giggled Professor Pyg, wiggling his hips slightly.
"Beautiful? That's a laugh!" growled a voice from above. Pyg, Flash, and the Dollotrons looked up to see the rest of the members of the Team on the walkway, looking down at the freak.
"Hey! Pyggie, Pyggie! Time to take you home!" growled Robin with a dark grin.
"Not by the hair of my chinnie-chin-chin!" screamed Professor Pyg, who grabbed a bottle of vodka from surgical table and a single match from the linings of his boxers. He drank a glass of it and lit the match quickly. Before they could act, Pyg spat out the vodka, caused it to combust, and blew it at the railing.
Surprisingly, the railings burst in flames and cover create a dangerous hazard zone. Superboy and Aqualad quickly jumped down from the railings before it hit them, leaving Robin and Miss Martian at the rails. As they came down, they both took down the crowd of Dollotrons holding Artemis and Kid Flash, Aqualad with a whip of water and Superboy with a massive shockwave respectively.
"Thanks man!" sighed Kid Flash.
"Where's the Pyg?" growled Superboy.
"Argh! He was just here!" grunted Kid Flash, looking around. They were suddenly grabbed by groups of Dollotrons, both struggling to get them off. The simplified dolls were quickly shot off by Artemis, who yelled at them, "Stop slackin' around! These freaks are everywhere!"
They all began attacking the army of Dollotrons, knocking them around and repeatedly slamming and bashing their faces around. They were dead already, holding back wasn't necessary right now.
Robin and Miss Martian were still on the burning walkway, with Robin helping Miss Martian up.
"M'gann, you A-R?" he asked softly.
"The heat…it's getting to me," she moaned, "Just…a little pain…"
"Mgh! Pain is like…fine wine to me!" gurgled a voice, they looked to the end of the walkway to see Professor Pyg standing there, brandishing a machete and a crude smile. Standing there in his underwear like a disgusting Dionysus. He stomped towards them, grunting, "I'm perfect…so much…more than…human…"
"Perfectly deranged, Pyg!" retorted Robin, holding out his bo staff to defend the frightened M'gann, "Perfectly ugly, you would've made a wonderful lawyer."
"How can you say ugly now? RUGGH!" moaned Pyg, swinging his machete at Robin, quickly ducking and getting behind Pyg, "You naughty birdy! Erm! Why you no be perfect?" He grunted as he swung his machete again, only to be received with a kick to the gut.
As Miss Martian watched in her weakness, she felt something grab her leg. She swung her head around and saw a weakened Dollotron try to pull her away.
"Robin! Superboy! Help me!" cried out Miss Martian telepathically. Robin was suddenly distracted and was hit in the face by Pyg's fat fist. He was knocked down on the ground and met with a fat foot to the chest.
"Ugh! You need a baaaad operation, Robin!" grunted Professor Pyg, swinging his machete around playfully as Robin tried to budge Pyg off. M'gann quickly began kicking the Dollotron off, yelping in fear. It did not budge, and began climbing over her. She closed her eyes as it slowly crawled on top of her, giggling softly.
"M'gann!"
She opened her eyes to see the Dollotron being pulled off by Superboy, grabbing Miss Martian's hand and helping her up. "You…okay?" he asked.
"Yes, I am…now…" she replied with a soft smile.
"Now now, Papa Spank!" rambled Professor Pyg, swinging his machete and grabbing the attention of the two league members, "Once you look your best! Mgrhgh! You will be free…to leave!"
"Not…A…Chance…FATTY!" growled Robin. Professor spat at Robin's face and stomped on his chest.
"Let him go, you tub of shit!" growled Superboy, stepping towards Pyg and ready to punch his lights out. Professor Pyg raised his machete and prepared to slice Robin's neck.
"One step closer, lovely-baby!" groaned Pyg, "And I make a sexy pez-dispenser from Roxas here!"
"M'gann…remember…what I told you…his…mommy…" groaned Robin, only to be met with another stomp, who yelled in pain.
"Shut the fuck up!" roared Professor Pyg, "You are hurting my dollies! I'll kill you! You don't deserve to be…"
"You can do better, Pyg. You can do better, so much better," said a voice in Pyg's head, causing him to drop his machete in surprise, "Pyggie's been a bad boy, a naughty boy. Guess who needs to go in time-out." Little did he know it was Miss Martian, pretending to be his Mommy Made of Nails.
"Muh…Mommy?" he let out, before he was punched in the face by Superboy, not holding back. He was sent flying to the wall, cracking it along with his right arm. Pyg wailed in pain, squirming on the concrete.
Then, water began raining from the sprinklers. The fire system was turned on, a faulty engineering device it seems. Robin, Superboy, and Miss Martian looked down to see Aqualad, Artemis, and Kid Flash putting the dead bodies of the Dollotrons in a large pile. Aqualad looked up and nodded to the three, they nodded back.
Professor Pyg tried to get himself up, before collapsing and vomiting on the ground. The white throw-up with bits of bacon created a disgusting puddle. "Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?" he kept on letting out. The other members of the team walked up the walkway and followed Robin to Professor Pyg, beaten on the ground.
"Don't rape me!" pleaded Professor Pyg, "I give my consent! Aughurghm!"
"Freak," muttered Kid Flash.
Artemis grabbed him and pulled him to his feet, glaring furiously at him. "This is for the shit you pulled me through." With a growl, she punched him in his fat stomach, causing him to scream in pain. And with a yell, she side kicked him in the face, sending him down a flight of stairs back down to the first floor, knocking him unconscious with his world getting blurry and unrecognizable.
Pyg woke up, upside down and above the floor. The rest of the Team were looking down at him. They have hung him upside down from the wires of his Mommy Made of Nails.
"Ugh! I see…the multitudes of the Mother Goat…" he moaned in pain, "Goat's in it's Gotham, God's in it's Heavens, Pyg's in his styeeeeeee!"
"What is wrong with this freakshow!" hissed Artemis.
"Don't know, too much drug abuse, CADMUS experimentation, or maybe just one bad day," replied Robin, shaking his head.
"So, we leave him like this till the cops show up?" asked Aqualad.
"Sounds good to me," chuckled Superboy.
"Doesn't that seem a bit harsh?" asked Miss Martian.
"You feel sorry for this fat tub of lard?" growled Kid Flash.
"No, he could die for all I care, but isn't this stooping to his level?" replied Miss Martian, staring at Pyg with content.
"That's all he can learn…pain," said a voice behind them. They looked to see Batman, standing at the entrance.
"Batman! When did you get here!" laughed Robin.
"After taking down Scarecrow, he wasn't too hard to deal with," replied Batman. walking past them and to Professor Pyg, "At least I had an antidote this time."
When he got to the Mommy Made of Nails, he knelt down and glared at the deranged freak, who was trying looking away from him, fearful and his mouth oozing slobber. "Oh god! Satan!" moaned Professor Pyg, "He's…come for me again!"
"Listen to me, Valentin," threatened Batman, "I will make sure you never enjoy life again if you show your ugly face out of Arkham. I promise you that."
"Cut me down!" moaned Pyg, "Pyggy's in paaaaaiiiiin!"
"Not a chance," growled Batman, turning to the others and saying, "Trust me, he deserves this. For all the people he stole from this world, and for all the loved ones he took from people."
And with that, they followed him out of the warehouse, leaving Pyg crying as his Dollotrons are piled up.
"Oh! Almost forgot!" laughed Kid Flash, rushing back and grabbing Pyg's apron, then waving it at Pyg mockingly, "Souviner!"
Unwisely, he sniffed it, then gagged and shook his head. "God that stinks!" He left Pyg angry and sad, moaning in pain.
As they left the warehouse, Aqualad turned to Batman. "Listen, I feel like there is something we are missing. Who called the meth-addicts and lead them to Pyg's location? Who knew where Artemis would be? And what was he doing in the ten week period?"
"In his condition, he is unnegotiable," explained Batman, "When he get's to Arkham, I will see to it that he is given extreme psychological profiling so I can see who is contact is."
GOTHAM CITY
September 29, 4:20 PM
Pyg snored loudly as he hung upside down, only to be awakened by a loud noise. He heard the sound of the door opening.
"Commissioner? Is that you?" grunted Pyg, "I need drugs! I am so lonely! Everything hurts!"
"It's me, Pyg," hissed a voice in the darkness, a dark figure watching him in shadows.
"Yuh…You!" moaned Pyg, "My bondage prince has come to save me! How pretty of you!"
"No, you have failed," hissed the voice, "But not to worry, it was all needed to see them work under pressure…from the looks of it, some failed, some succeeded. You did a good job, Valentin."
"You…soooo…kind!" moaned Pyg, "My darling! My sweet! My sexy little bitch!"
The figure walked to the surgical table, rubbing his gloved hand against the tools with admiration. "It's all according to plan, Valentin. It's all just one step in my own selfish desires, I am not afraid of admitting, of course."
He grabbed a nearby bucket and put it near his head, "Be sick in here, Pyg. The cops should be here in a few long minutes. You will be sent to Arkham, and you will help me construct something of great if too much importance."
"What?" grunted Pyg.
The figure did not say, only put his finger against Pyg's nose and let out a long, "Shhhhhhh". He then walked away, leaving the deranged beast alone. The beast…so much more than human…
The Banana Slug: I want to apologize for using so much quotes from the comics with Pyg, but those quotes are awesome as hell!
Besides, this is fanfiction, a writing style based on ideas and not claiming them as your own. I have the right…that is until SOPA returns. :|
Well, this has been my first "serious" fanfic for a long long while. Did I do good? I hope so.