I wrote this oneshot over a year ago, and even though I don't ship Klaine as much anymore, I still love this story and wanted to share it. This is just a little fluffy AU about how Blaine and Kurt meet for the first time.
Just to be clear: this story takes place the summer immediately after season two.
The vast majority of my stories center around Blam, so if you don't ship the two of them, you might not want to read any of my other stories. I will, however, be posting a multichapter Klaine story in a few months. That story will revolve around Sam and Blaine's friendship, but it will also feature Sam's attempts to set Blaine up with Kurt. If that sounds like fun, or if you want to see more Klaine from me, then you can check back around the beginning of 2014 and it should hopefully be posted.
And I'd like to thank my amazing beta, Tuuzmorado.
"I want to fall in love!" Kurt announced, dropping onto his bed. He turned his head slightly to the side so he could hold his cell phone between his pillow and his ear, leaving both hands free for dramatic gestures. Like pressing the back of his hand against his forehead, which he did, even though nobody could see him.
"I think you've wanted that for years," Mercedes said through the phone, sounding way too amused. "At least, you have the past two years I've known you. What brought this on?"
"Dad took Carole out for a romantic dinner," Kurt grumbled. "Finn and Rachel took the opportunity to make out on the couch. And no matter how hideous that girl looks in her grandma sweaters, she looks even worse without them on." He shuddered. "I have to sit on that couch, 'Cedes! And it's going to be really awkward when Dad asks me why I'm disinfecting the whole thing."
"Boy, you are not allowed to give me that mental image!" she exclaimed. "They're really doing that?"
"Well, she still had an undershirt on," he admitted. "But still, that's more of that girl's body than I ever hoped to see in my life. And now I really want to get even, but the only way I can think to do that is to kiss someone where Finn can see me – it doesn't matter how small the kiss is, you know he'll still freak out."
Mercedes snorted. "Much as I love the sound of that plan, I can't believe that you have no other ideas. If you wanted to get revenge, you'd get it."
"Well, yeah," he said, "but this is how I want to get revenge. But it's not about that, really. It's just that everyone has a boyfriend except for me."
"I don't-" Mercedes began, but Kurt cut her off.
"Please," he scoffed. "You and Sam have been hanging off each other since prom. Which doesn't make sense, because with that hair, he should totally be on my team."
Maybe that wasn't exactly fair to say. After all, he was glad that Mercedes had found someone. She'd been alone as long as he had, and she wanted love just as badly, much as she tried to deny it. Plus, Kurt had been close to Sam ever since the blonde boy defended him against Karofsky – in fact, if it wasn't for Sam's protection, Kurt might have been forced to transfer schools just to get away from the bullies. Thankfully, things hadn't gotten quite that bad.
So really, he was happy for the pair of them. Just not at this exact moment.
"Hey, I'm sure there's a hot gay boy in your future," Mercedes said, her voice slightly teasing. "For all you know, he could be right beside you."
"Pretty sure there isn't a guy creeping around in my bedroom," he joked, looking around just to be sure, then immediately felt stupid for doing so. "And I wouldn't want to date him if there was. I do not go for the Edward Cullen types! But seriously, I've looked and I haven't found anyone."
"Then maybe you should let him find you," she suggested. "Face it, Kurt, you kinda stand out. Just keep being your dramatic self, and someones going to notice. And if you see a hot guy, do not let him slip away. But maybe you should hold back the flirting unless you know he's gay, otherwise it'll be another Finn fiasco."
Kurt groaned at the memory. Thankfully, Finn had been just as eager as Kurt was to keep that little incident a secret, but Mercedes had some magic gossip powers. Which Kurt loved, except for when the gossip was about him.
"Anyway, I'm meeting Sam at the Lima Bean, so I gotta go decide on an outfit."
"The white top you wore at my house last weekend," Kurt said immediately. "Plus your really dark jeans and that one jacket I forced you to buy because it looks amazing on you, even if the sleeves are a tiny bit too tight."
"Thanks," she said, and he could hear the smile in her voice. "I'll text you later?"
"Definitely," he agreed, and hung up. After a second, he tossed his phone to the end of his bed with a sigh. Okay, so he was jealous. Incredibly, crazily jealous of his best friend in the whole world. So what if that made him a bad person? It wasn't like he could help it.
Everyone was in love, and all Kurt could do was lay in bed and throw himself a pity party about it.
Scratch that, he thought a moment later when Rachel started to moan downstairs. He could not lie in his bed – the house wasn't nearly sound-proof enough for that. He had to get out of here immediately before it got any worse. Kurt scrambled to grab the latest issue of Vogue and ran down the stairs two at a time, trying his best not to glance at the two figures entwined on the couch as he passed. He hurried outside and dropped into the hammock on the far side of the yard, next to the giant fence that separated them from the family that lived next door, the Andersons. It was far enough away that there was no chance of overhearing anything more. Now he just needed to get the noises he had heard out of his memory somehow, not that that would happen any time soon.
And seriously, he was so getting revenge on Finn for this one.
"I'll be coming home just to be alone!" Blaine sang at the top of his lungs, turning up the volume on his iPod as he hauled his suitcases into his house. He'd just gotten home from his sophomore year at Dalton, and already he couldn't wait to go back. Just being in his house was enough to do that to him. He hadn't been here since Christmas. He'd spent spring break with his friend Wes, and even though Dalton was close enough that he could potentially drive home every weekend, he usually didn't bother. With the number of hours his parents worked, it wasn't like he'd get to see them much, anyway.
Blaine dropped the last bag at the foot of the staircase. "Cause I know you're not there, and I know that you don't care!" Normally, Blaine didn't sing at home, and especially not this loud. But his parents didn't get home for another hour, meaning that he was home alone. So he could sing whatever the heck he wanted without anyone hearing him.
Which was why it was such a surprise when a pillow came flying from the top of the stairs and smacked him in the face.
"Stop with that depressing crap!" a familiar voice called, a moment before Cooper started walking down the steps, mock-scowling at his younger brother. "I'm surprised you even know what Three Days Grace is. I thought you were the one who sang happy stuff about sex toys and skin-tight jeans and other things that you apparently think are romantic."
"What are you doing here?" Blaine asked, too surprised to even wonder how Cooper knew about what types of songs the Warblers sang. He pulled the ear buds out of his ears and shoved the iPod into his pocket.
Cooper's mouth fell open. "You mean Mom and Dad didn't tell you? I'm here for the next two weeks, little squirt! How could they not mention that?" After a moment, his expression brightened. "I bet they wanted it to be a surprise. Okay, on a scale of one hundred to a thousand, how much did it brighten your day to walk in and see my face?"
"Zero," Blaine said, but he couldn't help but smile, no matter how he tried to hide it. "Especially if you won't stop with the short jokes. And 'little squirt' is redundant, you know."
Cooper just waved that away, then grabbed Blaine's hand and tried to drag him to the living room. "First things first, I've got an audition coming up in three weeks and I need your advice. It's for a commercial that could completely jump-start my career. This could be the big-time, bro!"
"And you want my advice on how to act?" Blaine asked skeptically. He yanked his arm out of Cooper's grip, but followed his brother anyway.
"What?" Cooper exclaimed, sounding more shocked than he had when Blaine said that he hadn't known Cooper was coming. "No, of course not! Why would I want that?"
Yeah, that was more like it.
"The casting director is this young lady," Cooper continued, moving to stand in the middle of the living room. "Probably thirty or so, definitely the type who doesn't get laid enough. So I want to shoot some new head shots to send her. The ones I have now are so typical – I need something special if I want to get noticed! Like, seductive-special! So at first I thought, 'How can I find a woman to tell me how attractive I am?' Well, the finding-a-woman part would be easy enough, but they're usually so overwhelmed that I wouldn't be able to get anything coherent from them."
Blaine snorted and shook his head, prompting Cooper to send him a sour look that lasted all of two seconds before the idiotic grin was back on his face.
"And then I realized that I don't need a woman! I have Blaine!" Cooper finished, holding his arms out dramatically. He looked like he was waiting for someone to throw roses at his feet.
"I'm pretty sure that's offensive," Blaine told him. "And I'm not helping with this." He turned and headed back to the staircase. The suitcases still needed to be taken up to his room, and he definitely didn't want to know what his parents would say if they came home and saw them in a pile on the floor. Not to mention it made a good excuse to get away from Cooper. Seriously, they hadn't seen each other in years or talked since February, and that was the first thing he wanted to talk about? He could at least pretend to care about what was going on in Blaine's life before reverting back to his narcissistic self.
"But you have to!" Cooper shouted after him. "Come on, just look at this pose!"
"What is it with everyone asking the gay guys what looks hot?" Blaine demanded. Wes and the rest of the Warblers were horrible about that. Blaine liked boys and all, but he didn't have the slightest idea what girls found attractive – hell, he didn't even know what guys liked, let alone the opposite gender. Eventually, he'd just started giving the worst advice they could think of in order to make it stop. It had worked for the most part, except Wes had yet to figure out what he was doing. Which was probably why he was permanently single.
"But Blaine!"
"No," he said, glancing over his shoulder. "You're my brother, that makes it even creepier, so- GOD, COOPER, PUT YOUR SHIRT ON!"
Cooper held up his arms proudly, making a muscle and grinning. "One look at this and the job will be mine!"
"One look at that and you'll be arrested for sexual harassment," Blaine countered, picking up his first suitcase.
"No no no!" Cooper grabbed the suitcase and threw it to the ground. Blaine winced at the crash, praying that his laptop wasn't in that bag. Cooper put his hands on Blaine's shoulders, facing him with a serious expression on his face, for once. "You can't leave my side. For one, I haven't seen you in years, so it's not fair to abandon me now."
Blaine thought about mentioning that it was Cooper's fault that they hadn't seen each other, but decided to refrain. For now, at least.
"And for another, I know that you're just going to go upstairs and listen to those depressing songs again, and you are not allowed to do that," Cooper said. "Sure, you might not like coming home, but it's summer! And I'm here! If that's not enough to put a smile on your face, then I don't know what is!"
Blaine ducked from under Cooper's hands. "I really have to bring these upstairs. And I don't have to spend time with anyone." Just to be difficult, he pulled his iPod out and started playing another one of the his 'depressing' songs as he picked up his suitcases. After all, there was no reason why Cooper should get to order him around.
"Fine!" Cooper screamed after him as Blaine climbed the stairs to his bedroom. "But I know you're planning on moping around for the rest of summer, so just know that I'm onto you and I'm going to put a stop to it! You are going to enjoy yourself even if I have to buy some happy pills and drug your food!"
"How have you not gotten yourself arrested yet?" Blaine shouted back, shaking his head and he nudged his bedroom door open with his foot. Seriously, he'd been home all of five minutes and already Cooper had talked about both sexual harassment and drugging Blaine. Someday he was going to say the wrong thing to the wrong person and then he'd really have hell to pay.
But despite how obnoxious and annoying Cooper was, Blaine had to admit that these next two weeks looked a whole lot brighter with him in the picture.
Kurt sighed and flipped back to the beginning of his Vogue. One magazine could only keep him occupied for so long, especially since he'd already read the first half of it yesterday. And he had the feeling that it wasn't safe to sneak back inside for something else to do – he valued his sanity too much to risk it, especially if Finn and/or Rachel had removed any more of their clothes. He huffed as he started rereading the first article. If he was stuck out here for much longer, he might seriously have to plan some sort of revenge just to keep himself from going stir-crazy.
"IT'S SUMMER!"
Kurt jumped when the voice suddenly came from behind the fence. Kurt didn't know the neighbors that well. Kurt's family had moved here back in November, shortly after his dad married Carole, so that they could finally have a house big enough that Finn and Kurt wouldn't have to share a room anymore. Since then, they had only had a handful of conversations with Mr. and Mrs. Anderson. They were usually quiet neighbors, when they were even home. Kurt definitely hadn't heard them scream before. In his opinion, Mr. Anderson looked way too stuck-up for anything like that. Not to mention he was old – like, twice Burt's age.
But they had two sons, right? Mrs. Anderson had told him that just a few days ago, when they'd both pulled into their driveways at the same time and had been forced to make polite conversation to avoid seeing rude. She'd said that she had one son at a boarding school, and another living in California. Blaine and... Kurt rubbed his forehead, trying to figure it out. C- something. Charlie? Conner?
"Stop it, Cooper! The neighbors are going to get annoyed," a different voice said.
Cooper. So that was it.
"No, Blaine!" the first voice – Cooper – said. He was just talking, but his voice somehow seemed louder than it had when he'd screamed. "I refuse to be quiet. Like I said, I am forcing you to have fun this summer. You want to sing? Fine. But you have to do it out here in the sunshine, and it has to be a fluffy song by one of those girly artists you like."
"They're not girly!" Blaine protested.
"They are females. That makes them girly artists," Cooper said. "Now sing!"
"Okay, yeah, they're girls. But that doesn't mean that boys can't appreciate their music, too!"
"Well, you're sure not appreciating their bodies." Cooper snorted. "Now sing!"
Kurt covered his mouth to hold back a laugh. From the sound of it, Blaine and Cooper bickered worse than he and Finn did. It was kind of like listening to the audio on a sitcom. At least it gave him something to do until the house was safe. Sure, he knew that it was probably bad to keep eavesdropping, but he didn't have a choice, did he? Which meant it wasn't his fault.
"Fine," Blaine groaned, and launched into a highly sarcastic version of "Hey Stephen" by Taylor Swift. He was good, too, even when he obviously wasn't trying to be. Really good, actually. And strangely familiar...
Kurt hopped off the hammock the moment the thought hit him, running over to the loose board in the fence so he could peer through the crack. Maybe this was a bad idea. It did take things past accidental eavesdropping and all the way to full-out spying, but he knew he'd heard that voice before. He just wanted to be sure.
Blaine looked a lot different without the Dalton blazer, but Kurt still recognized him immediately. He was definitely the lead singer of the Warblers. The New Directions had faced them twice this year, at Sectionals and Regionals. And Kurt had to admit, both times he'd thought that the lead singer was possibly the hottest boy in existence (that he'd seen in real life, at least).
Blaine hummed the last notes of the song and bowed to Cooper dramatically. Even though he'd started out sarcastic, somewhere around the second verse he'd obviously started to get into it and dance around the yard. And all Kurt had to say was that this boy was clearly just as good at improvising as he was at performing a routine. Seriously.
"Bravo!" Cooper called, clapping loudly. "Now sing that one that's on the radio way too much."
"That describes about half her songs," Blaine said, shaking his head. But even though his back was to Kurt now, there was obviously a smile in his voice. "And we really should go back inside."
"No," Cooper said firmly, pointing toward their deck. And apparently that was all the encouragement Blaine needed, because he ran and jumped onto the deck like it was a stage, turning around to face his brother. Kurt smiled. The way they were standing now, he would at least get to see the side of Blaine's face instead of the back of his head.
And this spying thing was really starting to get creepy. Kurt would have to head back to the hammock soon. But really, nobody could see him, so what was the harm?
"You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she'd upset. She's going off about something that you said. 'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do," Blaine sang. He was bouncing across the makeshift stage, and if Kurt was a teenage girl, he would seriously be fangirling right about now.
"You know, this song is about a gay guy trying to seduce a straight one," Cooper said casually.
Blaine broke off halfway through the next line. "It is not!"
"It is when you sing it," Cooper said. "Just listen to the lyrics! It's so obvious. You keep telling some guy to date you even though he already has a girlfriend."
"Shut up," Blaine grumbled, shaking his head in annoyance.
"Didn't something like that happen back in middle school?" Cooper asked, sounding honestly curious, but Kurt could tell from his grin that he already knew the answer. "With that one guy you asked out? Oh, man, that was great! What was his name?"
"Shut up!" Blaine said again, louder this time. He sounded honestly angry, but after a second his shoulders relaxed, and he smiled. "In my defense, he complimented my jeans and asked me to play video games alone in his bedroom. In middle school, that totally counted as flirting."
Cooper grinned. "Maybe you think so, but I doubt he did." Suddenly he clapped his hands sharply. "Get back to singing!" Blaine rolled his eyes but started up the song again.
Kurt was frozen in place, still staring through the crack. What had Mercedes said about the right boy being right beside him? And now he was finding out that his next-door neighbor was hot, an amazing singer, and apparently gay. Maybe Kurt could find a boy to date, after all.
There were a few problems, though. Like the fact that he didn't want to just date any random person. He wanted romance, and someone he really liked. Who knew if Blaine would actually be that person? But there was no harm in talking to him, at least. Of course, Kurt would have to think of a good way to start a conversation first. Somehow, he didn't think that "So I was spying on you earlier..." would cut it as an icebreaker.
"If you could see that I'm the one who understands you." Blaine spread his arms, still facing his audience of one. And Kurt added "good actor" to his mental list of hot traits that Blaine had – his voice sounded honestly desperate and in love. "Been here all along, so why can't you see?" Blaine pointed straight ahead. "You belong with me!"
"Yes!" Cooper cried dramatically, grabbing Blaine's outstretched hand and holding it against his chest. "Yes, Blaine! Let's declare out gay, incestuous love and run away to where our evil family will never try to keep us apart again!"
Kurt laughed despite himself, especially when he saw the horrified look on Blaine's face. Then he slapped his hand over his mouth, praying that neither of them had heard him.
"You're the only one in the yard. That doesn't mean I'm pointing at you," Blaine said, yanking his hand away and wiping it against his bright-red jeans like he'd been infected. "And I'm definitely not singing to you!"
"Well, duh!" Cooper laughed. "But your face was completely priceless, Squirt."
Kurt breathed a silent sigh of relief and stepped back from the fence. They hadn't heard him that time, but really, he should leave now before he messed up again and they really did catch him. Then he could spend the rest of the evening daydreaming about ways that he could meet Blaine for real.
"HEY, KURT! RACHEL SAYS IT'S SAFE TO COME IN, AND- WHY ARE YOU WAY OVER THERE BY THE FENCE?"
Kurt face-palmed as his step-brother screamed at him. Forget the Andersons overhearing – Kurt wouldn't be surprised if people two streets over had heard.
"Be inside in a minute!" Kurt called, hurrying to the hammock to grab his magazine as quickly as he could. Okay, so Blaine and Cooper knew that he was over by the fence, but that didn't mean anything. They didn't know why he was over there, after all. And they probably didn't really remember who Kurt was, so it wouldn't be a big deal, right? He just had to get to the house immediately, and everything would be fine.
"I think we've got ourselves a spy!" Cooper exclaimed. Kurt froze, then turned in time to see Cooper's head appear above the fence for a split second before disappearing again. "He's hot, too. Wanna come look?"
Kurt was officially screwed. And Finn was going to pay, again.
"What are you talking about, Cooper?" Blaine asked. His brother was over by the fence, jumping up and down repeatedly as he tried to look over the top. He'd said something about a spy, but based on his past behavior, that probably meant there was a squirrel watching them or something. Except the hot comment didn't seem to fit...
"Seriously, you want to come look!" Cooper said. "Just jump and peer over the fence- Oh wait, you can't reach." From the way he said it, Blaine couldn't tell if Cooper was making fun of him, or if he was honestly just realizing this now. Blaine guessed the former, though.
"Okay, just stand on my hands and I'll give you a boost!" Cooper said, sounding way to enthusiastic about the idea.
Blaine shook his head immediately. "There is no way I'm doing that."
"Buzzkill," Cooper grumbled. He jumped again, his head barely clearing the top of the fence. "HEY, YOU, GET BACK HERE! WE'RE TALKING TO YOU!"
"Listen, I wasn't spying," another voice said from beyond the fence. So that was what Cooper had meant. "I could hear you two talking – and singing – so I wanted to go see what was going on. Sorry if I bothered you, but I'm just going to go now-"
"Oh, no you're not!" Cooper said. "Come over here!"
"What?" Blaine asked, and the other boy – whoever he was – echoed him a moment later.
"Come on," Cooper urged. "You know the boy who was singing? He's my brother, Blaine. He also happens to be desperately lonely, and I'm going to force him to make friends even if it kills him. So get your butt over here and start making nice!"
"You can't just say that!" Blaine exclaimed. He didn't want to admit it, but his feelings were sort of hurt by the 'desperately lonely' thing. Because it was not true. Okay, so maybe he didn't have anyone but his brother to hang out with this summer, since most of his friends were on vacation, and the rest lived too far away for him to visit easily. And yes, that sort of stunk. But he had plenty of friends at Dalton. Not to mention that, even if it was true, Cooper shouldn't just go around saying it to random strangers.
He sighed and walked over to the fence before Cooper could say something to make everything worse. "Listen, just ignore Cooper. He'll drag you into his madness if you don't. And sorry if my singing bothered you."
There was a pause, and Blaine started to wonder if the other boy had just left without saying a word. Then the voice said, "Don't apologize. You sounded really good. And sorry if I was sort of spying on you."
"Knew it!" Cooper announced. "Of course, I could tell you were spying even before you confirmed it. Want to know why? Because you, my friend, are the worst spy ever."
The other guy snorted, and Blaine could picture him rolling his eyes like Blaine always did at Cooper's antics – which was kind of weird, considering Blaine didn't even know what he looked like. "You're with the Warblers, right?" he said, in an obvious we're-going-to-ignore-that-last-statement kind of tone. Another thing that Blaine used on Cooper all the time. "I saw you at Regionals. And Sectionals. So it wasn't like I was stalking you or anything, I swear that's the only reason I know."
Blaine chuckled, then took a moment to think back to the competitions, trying to remember the name of the team they had faced twice. "New Directions?"
"Yup," he confirmed.
"Did you get any solos?" Blaine asked eagerly. Maybe it was a little weird, but he wanted to be able to put a face to whoever he was speaking to. And a name, preferably. He should probably ask about that.
"I sang 'Don't Cry For Me Argentina' during Sectionals," he said. "Nothing during Regionals, unfortunately. My talent is seriously underrated by my group."
Blaine thought back, trying to remember the performance, but it had been a long time. And after a while, all the competitions started to blur together. He could just barely remember a group using that song, but he couldn't picture the lead singer no matter how hard you tried.
"You guys did really good," he said, instead of admitting that. "I was surprised we tied – I'd expected you to beat us, to be honest." That wasn't even a lie. The one thing he did remember about Sectionals was the panicked meeting Wes had called after they saw the New Directions perform, and how it had taken Blaine fifteen minutes to calm him down and convince him that they still had a chance.
"You know each other from show choir?" Cooper asked. By now, he looked like a toddler on Christmas, which wasn't too different than his normal look, but still worrying. Blaine tried to point out that they didn't actually know each other, but Cooper never gave him the chance. "That settles it! You have to come over and sing together or do each other's hair. I don't actually know what Blaine does when he has friends over, but whatever it is, you two have to come over here and do it!"
"Cooper," Blaine hissed at his brother for probably the dozenth time that day. Cooper didn't notice.
"Wait, are you gay?" Cooper asked. "Because I have a problem I need help with, and Blaine is being completely unreasonable about the whole thing."
"COOPER!" Blaine shouted, then turned back to the fence. "I'm really sorry about my brother, he can be a pain. God, you can just go ahead and leave now, you probably don't want to stay here and listen to him any more."
"Actually..." There was pause, like the boy is trying to make up his mind. Then he spoke, his voice much more confidant than Blaine had heard it before. "I am gay, and I'd love to come over, though I'm a little scared to hear what Cooper's 'problem' is. And don't worry, I'm sure my brother is as bad as yours."
"KURT!" a different voice screamed, as if to highlight his point. Blaine recognized it as the voice that had screamed earlier, asking Kurt why he was by the fence. "RACHEL WANTS TO KNOW WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO COME IN AND HELP HER. SHE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT WANTING ONE OF US TO LOOK GOOD FOR OUR DATE, AND I DON'T KNOW IF SHE MEANT ME OR HER, BUT YOU GOTTA COME-"
"Tell Rachel to pick out her own hideous sweater," Kurt called back, thankfully not screaming. The other boy's screaming was getting a little annoying. Kurt's voice was a whole lot nicer. It made Blaine really wish he could remember what it sounded like when he sang.
"But dude!" the other boy protested. "You said you'd help me plan the date tonight. It's our anniversary – at least, I think it is. I swear we just had one like a week ago, but Rachel says we need to celebrate tonight, so I have to plan something extra romantic. And you know I suck at that stuff!"
"Well, you should have thought of that before you drove me from the house with your celebrating," Kurt snarked, making Blaine wonder if that really meant what he thought it did. If he was right, then Kurt had his wholehearted sympathy.
"But-!"
"No," Kurt said firmly, and when he spoke again, Blaine could definitely hear a smile in his voice. "Anyway, I don't have time right now. I'm going over to a friend's house."