This story takes place immediately following the events of the second season episode "And Everything Nice"
The incessant knocking was most unwelcome.
Lucas Wolenczak turned over in his bunk and buried his head under a pillow, attempting to block out the sound, but the decidedly evil person pounding on the door to his room was apparently not going anywhere, much to his dismay.
Glancing blearily at the digital readout near his monitor, Lucas could see it was just after 6:00am. He had been up more than half the night after wandering aimlessly around the ship the previous evening, replaying over and over in his mind the events of the last few days. Eventually he decided he would occupy his mind by writing the report of those events that the Secretary General had requested he submit so it would be finished, but by then it was after midnight, and he hadn't eaten. After grabbing a tray from the mess hall and loading it with two slices of pizza, a basket of fries, an apple and a very large coffee he retreated to his room to begin the task.
By the exceedingly late hour of 4:00am he put the finishing touches on the last paragraph, powered down his rig, and managed to crawl into the top bunk out of sheer willpower and a strong desire to not fall asleep at his desk. Past experience had proven that to be a bad idea. Now barely two hours later someone was very rudely waking him from his much needed sleep.
"Tony?" Lucas mumbled, his weary voice muffled by the pillow on his face.
Loud snoring was his only reply from the bunk below. The knocking grew louder as the person seeking to gain entry became impatient
"Tony!" Lucas tried again, his voice still raspy but stronger. He leant partially over the edge of the bed and saw the young officer completely oblivious to the situation around him in a blissfully undisturbed slumber.
Rummaging around the bed, Lucas' hand came across a half-eaten apple from the night before. Using whatever strength his exhausted body could muster, he swung his arm down and released the apple at his sleeping roommate.
A startled cry told him he'd hit his mark.
"Hey! Lucas! What-?" Tony Piccolo sat up irritably, looking around for what hit him, before the knocking on the door finally caught his attention. Realizing the reason that the younger man had woken him, he shot a glare at the bunk above him.
"Keep your panties on, I'm coming!" he complained, standing from the bed with a loud grunt and ambling towards the door.
"WHAT?" he demanded crossly, as he swung the door open.
"Room 213A scheduled for full sweep at 0600 hours," the soldier on the other side of the entry stated plainly. Tony groaned. "Yeah, yeah, I remember," he yawned loudly.
Lucas, having overheard, was stirring back to full consciousness.
"Do you need us out of the room?" he croaked exhaustedly, already knowing the answer.
"Affirmative, the second soldier replied; nodding curtly. She and her partner waited by the door expectantly for the room's two inhabitants to collect themselves; they pulled on pants and shoes before hurrying out of the soldiers' way and into the corridor. The door closed sharply behind them and the pair stood beside one another, having no plan for what to do next. The silence in the hall at this hour was visible.
"Well that sucks," Tony griped with an annoyed glance back towards the room, but plastered a smile across his face as he turned his attention back to the person beside him. "So where to, Luke? I'm off-duty until this afternoon…" he trailed off, seeing the teenager's weary expression.
"It's six in the morning, Tony…" Lucas began, irritably.
"C'mon we can do something fun…hey we can sneak into the ward room and watch a movie…"
"Not really interested in your porno movies right now," Lucas stated flatly.
"Montana Blaze is a serious actress-"
"How would you know? You watch with no volume."
"It's in the eyes, she has very …expressive eyes" Tony said, fumbling for the word.
"You're not looking at her eyes, Tony." Lucas sighed, grinning in spite of himself. Tony shrugged sheepishly and Lucas just shook his head before continuing, "I just don't think I'd be very good company right now."
It had been two days since Lucas' help beacon had alerted the UEO officials and the crew of seaQuest to the attempt of a small group of activists, who had taken the teenager hostage, to steal the large submarine. And while everyone had made it clear how appreciative they were for his brave actions, and that he'd done everything he could, it was still standard procedure after such an attempt for the ship to remain docked while a full sweep was done of all systems and all rooms. The 3-month tour of Westpac had been delayed until the sweep was finished and as far as Lucas was concerned, all of this was his fault. If he hadn't acted so recklessly…if he'd just listened…they'd be on their way and on schedule. He wouldn't be plagued by the constant ache he'd felt since learning he was only being used by a woman that he foolishly believed loved him…
To make matters worse, his concentration was completely shot. He'd wanted nothing more than to get back to work and distract himself from the inner turmoil he had no desire to face; but that was turning out to be a chore in itself as Lucas was finding it very hard to focus on even the simplest tasks. His attention span was nearly non-existent and he was making amateur mistakes…it was unlike him and he couldn't seem to get himself out of the funk he'd been in since his return to the boat.
As he turned away from Tony and began to walk down the corridor, his mind drifted back to the previous night.
He'd wanted to be alone, it was pretty much his mantra since he'd been back on the boat, and that was no small feat for a ship with a crew this large. As the hour grew late, however, the task of finding an empty room became much easier.
It was almost two hours after Lucas had begun pacing the boat, when Captain Nathan Hale Bridger found him sitting by the Moon Pool, his back against the glass, looking silently upwards in thought.
The older man waited wordlessly for a few moments, debating whether he should interrupt the boy's thoughts, when Lucas finally spoke.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, his eyes still fixed on the ceiling, but they were glassy now, shining, and Bridger could tell he was fighting off tears.
"You don't need to apologize-" he began.
"Yes. Yes I do," Lucas insisted, now meeting Bridger's gaze. "You were right, and I didn't listen. I wouldn't listen…and I nearly cost us everything…" he trailed off, hugging his knees closer to his chest.
Bridger stepped next to and slid down to the floor beside the distraught boy, putting an arm gently around his shoulders.
"Lucas, I am not mad at you for wanting to live your life, and I accept your apology if it makes you feel better. As hard as it may be to believe, I know what it's like to be your age and want independence. It may have been a great many years since I've actually experienced it," he smiled, continuing, "but I remember."
Lucas gave a half-hearted grin that Bridger saw right through; he knew the boy was going to continue being hard on himself for his actions.
"I'm just glad you're safe," Bridger said, a more concerned tone in his voice now. "And it's okay if you don't want to talk about it, or if you feel you need to talk about it, I'll be here for you no matter what," he tried to assure the young man.
Again Lucas nodded, his emotions wavering slightly as he thought back over the last 24 hours. He'd been kidnapped, held hostage, tricked and humiliated…and while he'd been in more than a few tough spots during his time on the ship he was not usually the specifically intended target…they probably saw him as a stupid kid, the easiest mark, he thought bitterly.
Bridger could see the distress on the boy's face and drew him into a fatherly embrace; Lucas let his head fall on the older man's shoulder, tension still coursing through him, but thankful for the comfort at that moment.
"I know you won't be on the ship forever," Bridger began, softly, "But wherever your life takes you…I want you to be safe…I can't lose you, kiddo," he said, cutting himself off before his own emotions took over. The young man had shown a great deal of bravery, doing what he had done to alert his friends to his plight; and it worked. But all the ways it could have gone wrong were what Bridger couldn't stop thinking about, and he just couldn't lose Lucas…not like he'd lost Robert. He would never let that happen.
Lucas gently pulled back from the Captain, genuinely grateful for his words but what had happened was all his fault, no matter which way you cut it…or what anyone said. He had to make peace with that fact…and he just didn't know how.
"I think I'm going to take a walk," he stated simply, pushing himself up from the floor. Bridger rose beside him.
"Okay," the older man replied, patting the young man's shoulder reassuringly, "just make sure you get some rest when you're done." He could see Lucas was beating himself up over everything and wished he could wave his hand and make the boy's insecurities and anxieties disappear. But this was something the teenager was going to have to work out for himself, and all Bridger could do was let him do so.
Lucas nodded briefly in reply, before hurriedly turning and moving towards the door, and a long night alone with his thoughts.
The sound of Tony's voice brought him out of his recollection and back to present.
"Well that makes two of us," the Seaman said, as he jogged after the younger man to catch up. "It ain't easy to sleep while you're clickety-clacking at your computer all night long and lighting up the room with your sixteen monitors," he exaggerated, making a mock keyboard-typing motion with his hands as he spoke.
Lucas glanced sideways at his friend, grinning.
"Sorry I didn't realize you were awake."
"Don't worry about it," Tony remarked, with a wave of his hand. "No joke though, there should be a nighttime setting on those things, do you really need to be able to see the light from space?"
Lucas shook his head and rolled his eyes. He was aware that Tony had been trying his best to make him laugh for the last few days, and he appreciated the attempt. Tony was one of the few people aboard the ship right now that could almost distract him completely from the recent memories that he didn't want to dwell on…almost.
In a matter of minutes, they found themselves outside the mess hall, which was always busy at this time of day. Shift changes were happening and so the room was filled with people grabbing breakfast, or in some cases dinner, depending if they were about to start or just finishing up their shift.
Lucas followed Tony, feeling the sleepiness starting to kick in again, and joined him at a table already occupied by Lieutenant Tim O'Neill and Sensor Chief Miguel Ortiz.
"You guys look…" Tim began, as he watched the overtired duo seat themselves. Lucas immediately dropped his head to rest on his folded arms on the tabletop.
"Yeah we had a friendly wake-up call from a sweep team," Tony explained, rolling his eyes. "Though the chick was pretty hot…" he added, thinking of the female soldier who'd been at the door.
"Well," Miguel smiled, "No doubt she was won over by your charms – when she comes across your adult movies or your stack or magazines that'll only seal the deal!" Tony gave him a look that showed exactly what he could do with that smile.
"In any case they're scheduled to finish today," Tim commented, "right before we leave for New Cape Quest."
Lucas whipped his head up quickly at this statement.
"When we leave…what? I thought we weren't cleared for departure for a few days still?"
"We're not clear to start the tour," Miguel corrected, "But this is an escort mission for a couple of diplomats and their security detail. Apparently we were specifically requested, one of the passengers will be Cynthia Westphalen."
"Yep," Tim nodded, "we're making two stops at New Cape Quest and Montevideo before heading back to port here. Should take eight days. The diplomats are going to the Coral Colony off the coast of New Guinea so we can drop them off after we begin the tour."
Lucas took all of this in with growing apprehension. After his talk with the Captain the night before, he'd been planning to ask permission to take a launch up to the mainland for a day, or maybe more. They weren't supposed to be going anywhere for a few days as far as he'd known so the time wouldn't have been an issue…and he was starting to feel like he might need to step away just to collect himself. But if the ship was travelling that distance then a day trip would be out of the question, and he'd truly be stuck for the duration until the tour was over.
"You said eight days?" Lucas asked, anxiously, "Eight days and we'll be back here?"
"That's right," Tim confirmed, his expression one of confused concern at the young man…the distress he seemed to be in after hearing about the mission was obvious but the reason for it was a mystery.
"I'll catch ya's later," Lucas mumbled, rising from his seat. He could still see one option that might work, but first he'd have to get Bridger to give him the go ahead, and that would be the hard part. He barely made it around the table however, when the person he was about to look for was already in the room. Captain Bridger, carrying a tray with his breakfast headed for the vacant table next to the one Lucas had just been sitting at followed by Dr. Wendy Smith. The teenager hurried towards them just as they set their trays down.
"Captain," he began tentatively, when he was closer, his voice lowered. "Could…could I speak with you for a minute?"
"Good morning Lucas," Wendy smiled warmly as she sat down at the table, Lucas gave her a brief nod in reply, his eyes barely glancing in her direction before looking again at the Captain
"Sure Lucas, sure," Bridger nodded, taking a seat himself, "Sleep well?" he asked, though he could already tell from the dark circles that stood out starkly under the boy's bright blue eyes that this was likely not the case.
"Fine, thanks, I promise it will be just a minute," he repeated, gripping the back of the empty chair he stood behind.
"What's on your mind?" the Captain asked, glancing apologetically at Wendy. The doctor waved her hand dismissively, indicating she didn't mind at all. Bridger made welcoming gesture towards the chair the boy held onto which Lucas pulled out quickly and sat down.
"I want to request a shore leave," Lucas stated hurriedly, seeing Bridger's immediate wide-eyed surprise he continued before anyone else could speak, "I know we have orders for an escort mission to pick up diplomats at two stops and we're scheduled to be back in this area in about a week – I could stay here, take the Stinger with me so when you guys are on your way back you don't even have to stop to get me I'll just come to your location, it won't take any time off the schedule, I promise…" he trailed off, looking at the confusion written on the Captain's face.
"Lucas," Nathan began after a pause to process this information, "What brought this on? Are you alright?" He knew, of course, that Lucas was not himself right now, but he never expected he'd need or want to leave the ship at this moment.
"No-Yes-I don't know," Lucas stammered. "I mean no I'm fine but … I think a little time to think would be helpful right now. And if we leave for this mission and then go right into the tour it will be a long while before a chance comes along again."
"A chance to what?" Wendy asked softly.
Lucas sighed, suddenly very aware of the quiet slowly spreading over the room. He very much wished he hadn't started this conversation in the middle of the crowded mess hall. Anyone within earshot was clearly now pretending not to listen; but he hadn't thought about it, just saw the Captain and plunged ahead.
"A chance to be alone for a while…I think I just need a little room to breathe," Lucas admitted quietly.
Bridger considered the boy carefully, realizing the trauma of what the young man had been through was affecting him worse than he originally let on.
"It's not that I don't trust you," he began carefully, "But, I don't like the idea of leaving you alone when we will be so far out of reach, especially now after what's just happened."
"Please Captain," Lucas pleaded, his clear blue eyes imploring as he met the older man's gaze, "I'm not trying to worry you, I fully plan on coming back when you return next week…I just…" he trailed off, not sure what else to say to convince him. He swallowed hard; the emotion at his sudden feeling of desperation was threatening to build, but there was not a chance he was going to let that spill over here, in front of so many people.
The chatter in the room was no more than a dull murmur at this point and Bridger was still silently contemplating the teenager when Wendy cleared her throat.
"I think…" she began, "I think it might be good for him, Nathan," she spoke cautiously, but her expression was piercing. Bridger met her eyes and knew at once that she must have read the teenager, she would never invade his privacy but whatever sense she'd gotten off the boy's surface thoughts was enough to make her speak up.
He sighed heavily.
"Where would you even stay?"
Lucas, who had been feeling the gloom set in as he believed the captain was going to deny his request suddenly felt a glimmer of hope.
"I could find a hotel," he offered, "there's resorts all up the coast…"
"No I mean it, I want to be certain you're in a safe area-" Bridger began, when Ortiz cleared his throat in an obvious interruption from the adjacent table.
"I didn't mean to eavesdrop," he stated obligatorily, "but I might be able to help…"
Bridger only stared at the young officer, expectantly. Noticing this, Miguel hurriedly continued.
"You could stay at my family's vacation home," he offered. "It's not far from where we are now, and in the Stinger you'd get there in no time."
"Your family's…really, you would let me do that?" Lucas asked incredulously.
"Lieutenant?" the Captain inquired, the expression on his face indicating some elaboration was required.
"My parents own a house in Dana Point, on Capistrano Beach. It's ocean front property…they rent it out most of the summer except for when they or other relatives of ours want to stay there. My brother Carlos was there last week and my parents are in Australia until the end of the month, and even though the maid service still stops by twice a week regardless of someone staying there or not, they never rent it out after Carlos stays without inspecting things for themselves…so it's free for more than enough time if Lucas wanted to stay there... with your permission, of course, sir," Miguel finished hastily, dropping his gaze.
Lucas glanced at the Captain to gauge his reaction to this, he could see the older man was taking in what Miguel told him and he forced himself to be patient.
Finally, after several long minutes, Bridger sat up straighter and looked at the teenager.
"I want to hear from you every night – "
"Deal!" Lucas interrupted, eagerly.
"I'm serious," the captain persisted. "This is not up for discussion, no exceptions – every night!" he stated firmly, but despite his expression there was warmth to his words.
"Thank you Captain – " Lucas said sincerely, "I promise I'll be ready to get to work when I get back…" he turned to Miguel, "and thanks Lieutenant, I can't tell you how much I appreciate it…"
"Don't mention it," Miguel grinned. They'd all seen how hard Lucas was taking the backlash of the recent events…he was just glad he could do something to help. This also wasn't something he'd offer to many people, but he trusted the young genius, and considered him a close friend. "Come see me before you leave. I'll get you the coordinates, keys and security codes," he spoke hastily now, rushing to leave the room as he realized the time – he had no desire to arrive late to the bridge while Commander Ford was at the helm. Tim was already in the doorway, beckoning for him to hurry.
"Well," Bridger began, placing his hand on the younger man's shoulder supportively, "you have some packing to do. Get going, kiddo," he smiled. It was taking a great effort not to pull the plug on this whole excursion. The very last thing he could ever want to do right now would be to let Lucas out of his site for a long period of time let alone off the ship entirely; but he could also see how much the young man seemed to need it right now, and like it or not he wasn't exactly a child any longer.
Lucas nodded gratefully at the Captain, thanking him once more. He then turned to Wendy.
"Dr. Smith," he nodded, knowingly. She returned the gesture – very much aware that he knew she'd read him. As it was something she'd worked on with him for a while, she couldn't help but feel proud of the boy. He didn't have any psychic abilities, but he was getting much better at recognizing when someone was trying to use them on him, and blocking them.
Tony, having kept silent for the whole of the exchange he'd just witnessed, finally rose from his seat, exited the mess hall and fell in step beside his roommate who had already made it partway down the hall.
"Smooth Lucas, very smooth," he commented with a sly grin. The teenager rolled his eyes, jabbing his elbow towards the Seamen's gut, which was sidestepped at the last second.
"Shut up Tony," Lucas commented, but glad for the levity his friend always seemed to espouse.
They didn't make it all the way back to their room when the Seaman came to a sudden stop.
"I'll just…leave you alone to pack," he said with a casual shrug. "And in case I miss ya – take care of yourself, got it? Like don't talk to strangers…and don't do anything I wouldn't do!"
"Those two rules are in direct contradiction of each other Tony," Lucas smirked. "Also I'm not 6 years old, I think I can handle a conversation with a stranger, should the situation arise…"
"Yeah, well, whatever you know what I mean," Tony huffed in mock irritation.
Lucas knew what he meant. He meant don't make the same stupid mistakes he'd made last time.
"I'll see ya next week, Luke," Tony commented with a supportive clap on the teenager's arm.
The two men briefly nodded good-bye to one another, before turning and heading in opposite directions. Lucas picked up his pace, and hoped the sweep team was finished so he could pack and be on his way. Smiling slightly to himself, he felt the first hint of real calm he'd felt in days…and he could hardly believe that this had worked out so well.
When Lucas reached his room, he saw that the sweep team was, in fact, not finished, and a feeling of impatience settled over him. It had been quite obvious that the Captain hadn't really wanted to let him go but since the permission had been granted, he felt it would be best to move as quickly as possible just in case the older man had a change of heart.
As he paced the hall next to his room, he heard soft footsteps coming towards him and glanced over his shoulder to see Dr. Smith approaching.
"Hi Lucas," she smiled, warmly.
"Hi Dr. Smith," Lucas replied, turning to face her fully. "Is something wrong?" he asked, nervous that she might also have decided this trip was a bad idea.
"No, I just wanted to come see you before you left," she began. "I know you've been through a lot lately, and I want to make sure you know that we're here for you."
"I know," Lucas spoke quietly, averting his eyes. The subsequent silence lingered in the air for a moment.
"I know you felt me reading you," she changed the subject, "you've gotten much better."
"Thanks… I haven't practiced since you showed me a few months ago, so I wasn't certain at first…" he stammered.
"Well you haven't forgotten," Wendy confirmed, proudly. "I hope you have a restful trip," she continued, changing back to the original topic. "You deserve it...just don't confuse needing a break from the chaos with trying to put off dealing with something that you maybe aren't willing to deal with. It's okay not to be ready, but the only way to heal is to make it to that point…"
Lucas stared at her. He'd wondered himself if that was the reason he felt he needed to get away. Even after he'd apologized to the Captain he'd still felt just as terrible as he had beforehand. The guilt he felt over his words and actions towards his friends was at times, overwhelming…and he was certain that part of this was just wanting to put a bit of distance between him and that choking feeling.
"I…I'm…" he stammered, searching for the words. Wendy stepped forward and took his hands in hers.
"You don't have to say anything Lucas, just know we love and support you no matter what. Now I want you to enjoy your time and if you want to talk when you get back I will always make time for you…and if you don't, I don't want you to feel you have to," she smiled warmly and squeezed his hands understandingly.
Lucas watched in silence as she turned and headed back down the corridor. He knew she was right, but there was nothing he could do about it right now. He had to get out.
"I meant what I said before Lucas…every night," Captain Bridger repeated his condition for allowing the trip sternly, but once again his words were clearly meant with affection.
"I promise," Lucas nodded, anxious to get going. He'd gotten packed in record time, loaded up the Stinger, gotten all the information from Ortiz that was necessary – which came along with a thinly veiled death threat that nothing better be found broken by his parents upon their return and that he knew where Lucas slept – and now he was eagerly waiting to be on his way.
"Here," Bridger said then, holding out his hand, Lucas lifted his arm and the Captain placed a set of keys and what appeared to be a credit card in his hand; the teenager looked questioningly at the older man.
"I don't want you to be without money or a way to get around," Bridger explained sheepishly, "So I had the bike brought up to the mainland for you, and that's a UEO expense card – you can get food or whatever you need on it.
Lucas looked at the items in amazement and back at the man in front of him.
"Captain…I…thank you!" he beamed, not having expected this at all and especially excited to have use of the motorcycle.
"Just take care of yourself okay…and, if anything happens, anything at all, and you need to come back before next week you let me know and I'll arrange it."
Lucas didn't doubt the Captain's words, despite how impossible changing their schedule at this point seemed to be, he believed the older man would do exactly as he said – but the teenager had absolutely no intentions of ending his trip early.
"Thank you," the boy stated sincerely. The older man pulled him into a brief embrace which Lucas didn't resist, then with a firm pat on the teenager's shoulder, the Captain stepped back, nodded, and turned to exit the docking bay.
Having already said his good-byes to most everyone else, Lucas reached down for his last duffel bag, when someone else grasped it before him and lifted it from the floor. Looking up, the teenager saw Dagwood standing in front of him.
"Lucas leaving?" Dagwood asked, appearing worried.
"Just for a few days Dag," Lucas affirmed, smiling at his friend. I'll be back soon."
"Lucas sad." Dagwood stated, perceptively.
At that, the young man hesitated.
"A little, maybe," he conceded. "But I'll be okay," he hurriedly added, seeing the Gelf's concern grow.
"I could come…help Lucas," he offered.
"Thank you Dagwood," Lucas smiled, knowing his friend wasn't even certain what he was offering. "I just need a little time to myself. I'll see you soon." He held out his hand for the bag, but Dagwood dropped the pack, stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the thin teenager, pinning his arms to his sides in a giant bear hug. Lucas grunted involuntarily as he felt his feet lift from the floor for several seconds, before the larger man released him and he caught his balance as he once again gained his footing.
Dagwood lifted the bag once more and passed it to Lucas, who watched as his childlike friend turned and hurried away. Lucas shook his head and smiled at the Gelf's good-bye, before loading the last bag into the Stinger and climbing into the vessel, glad to at last be on his way.
Hey all! So I haven't written any fanfictions in a truly long time, and this is my first attempt at writing one for seaQuest. I had this idea a few years back and recently came across the notebook I had scribbled it all down in and basically decided might as well get to writing it after finding all the notes were still there.
I know I embellished a bit when it comes to Wendy and Lucas and the practice sessions but for the most part I tried to keep everyone as in character in possible ...which is harder than I thought it would be, I guess I'll just have to re-watch the show ;)
I didn't get into the research when it comes to geography and travel speed and all that jazz for the SQ universe as opposed to ours so please suspend your disbelief as I pretty much just pulled numbers out of thin air to work with the story haha, but either way I hope you enjoy and please review if you have something to say – good, bad, whatever – I'd love to hear what you think – thanks all!