It Seems Like Forever Ago
Fox was walking along the sidewalk. It was a bright day out. Too bright. It didn't suit his mood. The same mood he had been in for a little over a year now. He couldn't stand the fact that life seemed so happy while he was alone. He would never be that happy unless she came back.
As he walked, other people were going the other way. He did his best to avoid them so that he didn't bump into them. The crowd started to get thicker. The last thing he wanted to do right now was interact with another person and have them recognize him. He was too depressed to go through a whole autograph signing spree when he could be by himself with his thoughts. Thoughts of her. He was able to avoid most of the people in his way. There was one time that he bumped into a vixen and forced her to drop all of the bags she was carrying. As he bent over to help pick up what he had knocked over, apologizing for his clumsiness, his hand and her hand reached for the same bag. He saw the color of the fur on the back of the hand. It was blue. He looked up at the face he had always longed for but never thought he would see again. She looked back at him. She smiled.
Then her face changed to one of pure rage. She opened her mouth to let out a scream of horrible pain and heartbreak.
"WHY!"
"Aaah!"
Fox awoke with a start. This dream had become a regular occurrence for him, but it never lost its effect on him. He looked around him. He was in his room at his house, and he was alone. She still wasn't here. That part of the dream had been real at least.
He rose from the bed in the center of the room and walked over to the desk at the opposite wall and picked up his iPod. He knew that the only way through a tough time was through music. He'd thought about starting his own band, but had decided to just listen to other people's work for now.
He put the music on shuffle, not really caring what it was he was listening to. He just needed something to drown out the memories. Unfortunately, music can do the exact opposite. He had also learned that walking often took a person's mind off of a problem, so he headed for the door, through the living room, out the front door, and down the driveway towards the center area of the city. As he walked into the night, the music started playing. It started out with a slow drum beat, and then a quiet guitar joined in. Fox sighed. He knew which song this was, and couldn't help but chuckle at the appropriateness of it as the vocalist started singing.
Thought I ran into you down on the street,
Then it turned out to only be a dream.
He tried to forget what he had done. She had chosen her way, and he had chosen his. That was that, or so he kept telling himself.
I made a point to burn all of the photographs.
Not quite all of them. Fox thought to himself. I saved that one of us on Sauria, at Cape Claw, watching the sunset. She was leaning on my shoulder and I had my hand around her waist. It was probably not the best idea to keep that. I need to move on. She's gone now.
She went away and then I took a different path.
I remember the face, but I can't recall the name.
That is as far from the truth as possible. I could never forget a name so fitting for someone so beautiful.
Now I wonder how Whatsername has been.
As a momentary lull in the lyrics came, Fox turned a corner. He thought back to his dream. It has seemed so real, and he kept having it. Why?
Sometimes it feels so real it's like I'm standing next to her. Where did she go?
Seems that she disappeared without a trace.
Did she ever marry old Whatsisface?
Panther. Fox thought bitterly. If I ever see that bastard again in my life, he's dead. She deserved so much better than him.
I made a point to burn all of the photographs.
She went away and then I took a different path.
I remember the face, but I can't recall the name.
Now I wonder how Whatsername has been.
The song started to get intense, then slowed, then seemed to explode with melancholy emotion. Fox couldn't help but nod along with the song while he closed his eyes in an effort to fight back tears. It was a fight he knew he'd lose.
Remember! Whatever! It seems like forever ago!
Remember! Whatever! It seems like forever ago!
He knew people were watching him, but he didn't care. None of them mattered. Only she mattered, and she wasn't there. It was all because of him that she wasn't there too.
God damnit! If I hadn't been so stupid I could have stayed with her! She WOULD have stayed! We had such a future!
"The regrets are useless in my mind. Say them out loud Fox, and I might here them."
"SHE'S IN MY HEAD!"
I must confess, the regrets are useless in my mind.
She's in my head,
From so long ago, go, go, go, go, go.
The word "go" faded off into an echo, like a missed opportunity of a bright future. Every time he heard it he thought of how he had said the same thing to her. "Just go". Fox knew she was here somewhere nearby, close enough to hear his thoughts. She was close enough that she said she might be able to hear him speak. His gaze turned in every direction for any sign that he wasn't imagining things. The lyrics started to fade back in.
Go, go, go, go, go.
If the previous line had been meant to be a fading opportunity, then this was its return. He wasn't going to miss it.
Fox fell to his knees with his hands balled into fists on the ground. "Krystal, if you can hear me," He swallowed in his throat "I am so sorry for what I have done."
He felt a hand touch his shoulder gently. He turned around slowly. As he looked at the hand on his shoulder, he saw the fur color and smiled.
It was blue.
Krystal looked down at him and held up her other hand, holding the one picture Fox had left of their time together.
"I knew what you were thinking when I heard that song playing in your head. We used to listen to it together, remember?"
As the song came to a finish, Fox heard Krystal sing with the last of the lyrics in his head. As the track ended he slowly stood up, took her face into his hands, and met her lips with his own.
"And in the darkest night,
If my memory serves me right,
I'll never turn back time.
Forgetting, you but not the time."
The guitar and bass slowed the song down as Fox took Krystal's hand in his own, and ended as the two foxes made their way back home.
A/N:
Okay, so I think you probably all know this, but I don't own Fox, Krystal, or the lyrics to this song. The song is Whatsername by Green Day.
Also, I may not be able to post for a little bit. I am NOT giving up already on How to Escape Your Life already though, so don't worry.
I hope you all enjoyed!
800M23