A/N: Hey! Alright, so I know I'm in the middle of a story right now, but I got inspired so I thought I'd write this. If you've ever seen Life or Something Like It (with Angelina Jolie and Ed Burns) then you'll recognize the plotline a bit, because I was partly inspired by that film. Good job, you guys! Hehe. Anyway, I wanted to write a post-Hogwarts story, since I never have and I thought it'd be fun, so here goes! It's a little bit like other post-Hogwarts R/H stories that are comedies, but (not to dis those stories, cause I love them so much and I read them all the time) I wanted mine to be a little more realistic and in character. So I hope I've done a good job. If not, let me know. I may change it, I may not. It's not quite in my normal style of writing, but… I'm just gonna write what's funny, and if it gets a bit OOC, well I'm just having a little fun here. Hope you like it!

Lauren

Disclaimer: I don't own Ron, Hermione, Harry, Angelina Jolie, or Edward Burns…yet. (particularly the Edward Burns part…)

Chapter One

No Pun Intended

Picture this, if you will. Picture…a very beautiful young woman, about 24 years of age. Her hair a beautiful mass of curls, cascading down her back. Her eyes, the most decadent shade of brown. Honestly, one day you'll find you crave them. Anyway, this woman…creamy skin that looks so delicate and feels so soft to the touch. Very secure at a height of, oh, let's say five foot six, shall we? And a mouth that, with every word, causes shivers to crawl down your spine. Yes, a very powerful woman indeed.

Do you have her in your head? Good. Let's get started.

"Shit! Oh bugger, oh bugger, oh bugger!"

Hermione Granger's alarm had just gone off. But somehow, someway, it had been delayed two hours and had just gone off at 8:30 a.m. She was now sitting bolt right in her quite large bed, rubbing her eyes and almost falling over herself before she rolled over and pressed her lips onto the mass of dark brown hair on the pillow next to her. She jumped up, pushed her hair out of her eyes, and took off across the rather large space around her (known as her bedroom) for the bathroom. The mass of dark brown hair still in bed happened (thankfully) to be attached a head, which in turn was attached to a body. The body of a very rich man. A very rich and powerful man. You see the attraction, no?

Ten minutes later, Miss Granger gracefully stepped down the steps from the bathroom to her impressively posh living room. (Yes, I know, ten minutes is impossible you say. But remember, this is the Hermione Granger we're talking about.) She opened the Burberry curtains, revealing the warm sunlight. The mass of dark brown hair moaned, hiding its face under the covers.

"Hermione, what are you doing?" it grumbled, very displeased.

"What do you think I'm doing? It's morning; time to get up and go to work," she said, now pouring herself a cup of coffee. She sat down at the table and opened the newspaper, sipping from her cup in that Hermione way. The mass of dark hair peeked its head over the blanket to take a look at her.

"Hermione, I'll never understand how you do it, but I guess that's one of the things I find so special about you."

"Hmm, what's that?" she asked, smiling.

"The way you can get up so damn early and make yourself ready in so little time…it's nearly inspiring, you know," he said, finally sitting up and shaking his mop of hair out of his face. Hermione grinned.

"Why thank you," she said, and she continued her reading and sipping.

Another ten minutes later, Hermione was kissing her lovely, er, mass-of-haired man goodbye and stepping into the middle of the living room. With one last wink and a loud crack, she was gone. She appeared a moment later in the middle of a very noisy crowd. She looked around her, and spotting something she was looking for, she took off in that direction.

Ten minutes and four floors later, Hermione was walking into the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. She walked briskly toward her desk, smiling at her coworkers as they passed, and within seconds, she was in her chair, picking up the several memos that had 'landed' onto her desk. Leaning back in her chair, she chanced a glimpse around the corner of her cubicle at a large, older man passing by and speaking jovially to another woman. Hermione sighed as she returned to her normal position and began to read her memos.

"Hermione, may I see you in my office for a moment?" came a voice from behind her. Hermione smiled in mock surprise.

"Why of course, Mr. Abernathy," she said, rising out of her chair. She followed him past three cubicles and into his office, taking a seat across from him.

"Hermione, I've been speaking with the Head of Department, and there's an open position for the chair in Ireland, and I'd like to send him your resume," he said, leaning forward against the table so that his bulging stomach spread in two. Hermione gasped.

"You're joking," she whispered, awestruck.

"Not at all! Of course I'm going to send it, are you kidding? You're probably the best Regulator we've got around here! I would figure you'd expect me to send it," he said, his chin bobbling as he laughed. Hermione let her eyes become transfixed momentarily as he continued to chuckle, then shook her head slightly and looked into his eyes.

"Mr. Abernathy, I can't thank you enough, this is wonderful! How can I thank you?" she asked.

"Well, actually, I'd like you to do an assignment for the next couple of weeks, concerning the Quidditch World Cup. There's been a few issues concerning the treatment of team mascots, particularly during the Cup games, seems as though their rights aren't being met, and I thought you'd be perfect for the job," he spoke, cleaning the dirt from under his nails.

"Sure, I'll get to work on it right away," she said, uncrossing her leg to stand up. "When do I leave?"

"Well, it won't just be you, you see, I think you'll need the assistance of someone who knows a bit more in that field, to help you out a bit. I'd like you to work with someone in Magical Games and Sports, so you'll get an expert to help you around, if that's all right with you," he said, fumbling for something in his desk drawer.

"Sure, that's okay with me," she said, now standing, and about to push in her chair.

"Great," he responded, and he pushed a button on his desk. "Shirley, could you send a memo to Magical Games and Sports for me?" he said loudly.

"Of course, Mr. Abernathy, who should I address it to?"

"Mister Ronald Weasley."

Hermione grabbed onto Mr. Abernathy's desk, steadying her wobbly legs. She pulled out her chair again and sank into it heavily.

"Ronald Weasley? Oh no, Mr. Abernathy, I-I can't work with him," she said immediately.

"And why not? He's the best in the department, really knows his way around, I promise! He's the very best, and he'll make it very easy for you," he said, overlooking the appearance of frustration on her face.

"But sir, you don't understand-"

"Hermione, what is so bad about working with him?"

Hermione stared back at him blankly. Is he serious?

"Well, it's—I can't really explain, it's—argh, sir, I just can't!"

"Hermione, do you want this assignment or not?" he said sternly, chewing on a bar of chocolate.

"Well yes, of course I do, but-"

"Well then it's settled. No ifs, ands or buts about it, you will go, and you will work with Mr. Weasley. You will start tomorrow, at Gloucester Field, at eight a.m., all right? Mr. Weasley will be there to help get you set up, and you can start as soon as you're ready. You'll do fine, perfectly fine, there's nothing to worry about. If I didn't think you could do it, I wouldn't have given it to you, you know that," he said, and with that he gave her a smile and let her walk out the door.

"Kids these days…so many complications," he said with a sigh, and, grinning resignedly, took a large bite out of his chocolate bar.

Hermione stormed into her office, appalled. She grabbed her purse, shoved her wand and other important miscellaneous items inside, and stood at her desk. With a loud crack, she was back home in her designer living room. She dropped her things onto the couch and sank down next to them.

"Why me, why me, why me?!" she moaned to nobody in particular. A few moments later, she heard footsteps as the mop-headed man strode in and took a seat next to her.

"Why you what, sweetie?" he said in his very American accent. I suppose this would be a good time to introduce you to this previously mysterious brown head of hair Hermione loves so very much. His name is Don, Don Henson, and they met in America in a case Hermione was assigned to. He had been playing football (which Hermione assumed would be what we know as soccer, but had been greatly surprised to discover otherwise) when an animal attacked him. It had turned out to be a new, undiscovered breed of dragon and dog, which had undoubtedly left Don with a few souvenir bites. In an attempt to learn more about the animal, he was brought back to London, where they could study his bites. To make a long story short, Don and Hermione hit it off pretty well, and moved in together approximately seven months later and at this point have been living together for about a year.

But back to the story.

"Oh, it's just this new assignment I've got, I can't believe he's making me work with-with—with him!" she cried, throwing her arms up in the air. Don grabbed them and took her hands in his, smiling.

"Him? Who's this 'him'?"

"Argh, Ronald Weasley," she proclaimed, pronouncing each syllable succinctly, each with increasing distaste.

"Ronald Weasley?" he asked, mimicking her. "Well, who on earth is that fellow, darling?" he asked with his best British accent.

"Don, this is no time for joking," she said, fighting back laughter, "this is very serious! This would be a great opportunity if I didn't have to deal with that wally, he'll probably screw everything over and then what will I do? Grr, Don, what am I to do?" she wailed, strangling the air in front of her in a manner that could only suit a Weasley. Don chuckled, pulling her onto his lap and kissing her cheek.

"Look honey, he can't possibly be that hard to deal with. I mean, he's a guy, right? So just flirt with him a little, lead him on a bit, you know what I mean? And he'll be putty in your hands. That way he won't get in your way, and he'll think he's having a little fun."

Hermione's face froze. What?

"What? You're telling me to flirt with someone who, by the way, happens to be very much unlike you in every way, shape and form, and who happens not to be my boyfriend…I am almost insulted, why would you tell me to do something like that?"

"Hon, I'm just trying to give you a little bit of advice, that's all, make it easier for you. You don't have to do it, it was just a joke, all right?" he said, and he hugged her tightly and pulled her into a short kiss. Hermione grinned, pleased, then pushed herself from his lap and kissed his forehead.

"All right, well thank you for your 'expertise', but I'm going to go see if I can discuss this with Abernathy again, convince him that this is all wrong," she said, heading for the table to retrieve her purse. "I'll see you later tonight, right?"

"Of course you will, tonight."

He waved goodbye, and was soon waving to thin air.

Hermione headed down the crowded halls of level four with a determined expression on her face and mumbling her planned speech. Taking a deep breath, she turned the handle of the office at the end of the hallway and stepped inside. What she saw shocked her.

"Oh, Hermione, perfect timing! Look who's here, to meet you at last!" Mr. Abernathy proclaimed, his chins working overtime. Hermione gulped, her eyes fighting madly not to stare at the floor.

"Well, it's nice to see you again, Miss Granger."

Please review! I know it's not as descriptive as my other stories are, but like I said, this is just for fun! Hope you liked it! More is on the way!