We Shouldn't
Summary: They both exchanged glanced, thinking the same thing. Seeing the bit of dyed red hair sticking out from behind the door. That was Cat, and shit, she had seen them. Because they really shouldn't have, but with their relationship, they always bent the rules. Or made their own.
Rating: T
Pairings: Beck/Jade, slight Tori/Beck.
AN: This, this is what should of happened after that terrible episode. BADE ALL THE WAY PEOPLE! 3
OoOoOoO
Jade left Tori and Beck to converse, probably ready to make plans for their next date. Sure, her anger had vanished, but that had not meant her envy had gone out the door as well. She left Cat in there to talk to the nurse, whatever her name had been and plopped down on the hood of her car, bringing her feet up and resting her elbows on her knees, staring out at the sky.
Her heart felt rather heavy in her chest, still pounding from how she had intervened. She couldn't blame Tori or Beck for finding an attraction towards each other, hell; she couldn't blame herself for being jealous! It was a natural thing, uncontrollable.
That was for damn sure.
She clenched her fists and let out an uneasy breath. She just had to wrap her head around the fact that Beck didn't love her anymore; he didn't care for her anymore other then for being a friend, even though she doubted she could even muster a friendly relationship, that didn't hold anything more.
Tori was more beautiful, Tori was smarter, nicer, and had a hellava lot more in common with him. They didn't fight like an old married couple, they didn't hurt each other…
Jade's hand went up to wipe at the stray tears coming from her eyes. Stop it, she told herself, scolding. Don't cry over him, don't you dare cry over him. She hated what he was doing to her, making her like…this. It was despicable, aggravating, and everything in between.
Oh shit, you're crying over him. She could feel her mascara and eye liner streaking down her face, creating deep black lines like tire tracks down her face. The dark lines were incredibly hard to get rid of, considering Jade had specifically purchased the long lasting mascara, supposedly waterproof.
Waterproof her ass! Stupid make-up labels should clarify a bit more.
She scowled irritably, almost laughing. She was so pathetic, wasting tears on Beck fucking Oliver.
This was ridiculous.
The brunette buried her head in her hands, releasing another chorus of sighs, scrubbing furiously at her face. This better not be like the time she had rubbed Sharpee all over her face, it had taken her weeks to get it fully off, curse her pale complexion.
Little did she know that someone had come out to join her.
Beck eyed her, frowning gently. Was she still upset? Even after her display of not caring back in the clinic? He felt the need to ask, he still cared, much to his dismay.
"Jade?" He said her name like it was question. Jade immediately stiffened, the familiar silky tone speaking her name.
She leaned up, her hands falling to the hood of her car, her gaze falling back to her lap as she fidgeted with the material of her leggings.
"What?" She retorted, her voice neither stinging nor venomous, just defeated, exhausted. He ran his fingers through his hair, smoothing it off his face.
He hated what he was doing to her.
Stuffing his hands in his pockets, shrugging lazily, "Mind if I join you?" Her eyes widened slightly, slightly opening her mouth, "Just… yeah, sure, do what you want." She sighed, eyebrows furrowing as she scooted over, allowing him space to sit, her hood wasn't that wide. What did he want? She admitted she was a bit suspicious.
Nodding curtly, he took the spot neck to her, arranging himself comfortably. There was an awkward tension, so thick; you wouldn't even be able to cut it with a knife if you dared to try.
Silence. Crickets. Silence.
Beck was the one to break the silence; "You really are ok with me going out with Tori?" He questioned, turning his head and meeting her gray eyes. Her sad gray eyes.
She chuckled sorrowfully, "I doubt my blessing matters two bits in the mind of you
Beck. You can do, whatever the hell you want!" Her gaze turned sour. "I'm your ex-girlfriend, emphasis on the ex, I have no control over you, and I never did."
He snorted, "And like I had control over you?"
"I'm not saying that," Jade hissed. "God dammit Beck, you are the most infuriating guy ever!" He laughed, grinning slightly.
"I know." Hade focused in on the crickets and the sound of her breathing. She hated him. She also loved him. Damn mixed feelings.
"I thought you said it wasn't a date," She snorted, rolling her eyes. He flushed gently and stared at the tip of his shoe.
"It wasn't."
She nodded, "Yeah, sure," She chided, disappointment laced in her tone.
Beck turned his head, staring at the thick lines of black running down the apples of her cheeks.
He pointed, "Ya got a little something…" Her eyes went wide and she let out a grunt.
"Shut up," And he couldn't help but smirk.
After a moment, she turned again, her expression softer, "When did you stop loving me?" She blurted suddenly, before staring back at out at the parking lot, the sounds of night filing into her ears.
Beck swallowed a heavy lump in his throat. "What?"
She didn't even stutter. "You heard me."
For once, he was unsure of what to say. "I-I…" His voice trailed off. She smiled, shaking her head.
"You never were good at hiding things," Jade shook her black, sort curls clearing her face. "Definitely not about about the fact that you were Canadian."
"I wasn't hiding it!" He insisted, a frown etching itself deeply in his face.
Jade shot him a fierce glare. "Not the point," She hissed, wrapping her arms around her folded knees, eyes straying. "I should of known the second Vega walked in that you'd have your eyes set on her." Beck was unsure of whether to be offended or not by that. What did she mean?
"Hey-" He began, but was quickly cut off.
"No 'heys'," She mimicked his voice with a deep clarity. "This is the second time you've set your sights on the new girl." Beck arched a confused eyebrow; honestly not sure of what she was even talking about.
"Does Zooey Martinez ring any bells?" He stiffened, the name clearly sinking in, his face going stoic. "See? This is a normal thing for you, never knew why I thought any different," She huffed. "I-I knew, as time went on you were falling for her…"
"Jade…" He began.
"No, it's true." She turned her head, gazing directly into those deep brown eyes. "You-You started always wanting to hand out with her, we were never alone anymore, whenever I needed you, you'd make up some excuse involving Tori. You stopped saying you loved me, you stopped kissing me as often, hell, you barely even glanced my way! It was always Tori Tori Tori!" His heart sank at her words. "You did you best trying to make me jealous because of her too, that's for damn sure," She snapped seethingly, fists clenching at her sides as Beck sighed. "You have no idea, how hard that was, knowing that…this, was going to happen sometime, why the hell do you think I was always so paranoid! You were the reason, flaunting yourself at Tori and being friends to every girl in the god damn world!" At this point tears at found themselves lingering in the corners of her eyelids.
"Yes, but-"
"Ha! You just admitted it," She pointed out, feeling a bit of satisfaction, cutting him off once again.
"Will you just let me talk for once Jade? I can never get a word in edgewise with you." She scowled, but stayed silent. She couldn't quite frankly sense his aggravation, because that same emotion was burrowed deep in her mind, the cause of it strictly being him.
"Look, Jade, as much as you want to blame me for the break-up, it was you, it was all you! You changed!" Jade scoffed loudly, finding his statement quite laughable.
"I changed?" He nodded.
"As hard as it is to believe Jade, you changed. You lost your confidence, when I compliment you; you doubted every word that came out of my mouth! You dyed your hair even when you knew I thought you had beautiful brown hair. You put most of your focus on making Tori miserable, you-"
"Dying my hair has nothing to do with anything! I wanted a change! A small change, not a change that meant losing you Beck," She broke in with an angered grunt. "Why wouldn't I want to make her miserable? You were fucking in love with her!" She threw her arms up in a wild gesture of unconcealed anger towards him.
"No I wasn't!"
"Yes you are!"
Beck lurched forward, grabbing onto her upper arms to stop her from making such wild hand gestures anymore. "God dammit Jade! I loved you more then life, I loved you more then it was humanly possible, I love you so damn much it shouldn't have even been possible! I love you so much it damn well hurts!" He stared deeply into her eyes, loosening the grip on her arms. He always made her go crazy.
"Don't you ever say I didn't love you, because that is so god damn untrue!" He released her arms and stop up, leaving her to watch him, wide eyed. His adrenaline was pumping widely in his veins, his heart thudding, his blood boiling. He was too hyped up' he needed to calm down a little. Just a little.
Beck paced and was frustrated that she wasn't saying any thing; she wasn't mustering any sort of rebuttal to continue this and that angered him.
"For God Sake's, say something! When I said shut up, I meant momentarily, not for you to become a mute!" Suddenly, she broke out in a large smile, a smile lighting up half her face; he hadn't seen her smile like that in a while and immediately, he was suspicious.
"What?" He asked, clearly confused. The smile still stood. "For God Sakes why are you smiling?" She laughed, a light airy noise, and got up, brushing her pants off and padding over to stand in front of him, shrugging her shoulders.
"Do you know how irritating you are?" She questioned, arching a fine eyebrow.
Wait. What?
Beck groaned, running a hand down his face, "Jade, I thought we already established this?"
"No you idiot," She scowled, eyebrows slanting. "Because of the mixed signals you keep sending my way!"
His facial expressions were laced with even more confusion, confuzzled even. "Mind clarifying?"
Jade rolled her eyes up at the ceiling, obviously agitated and exasperated. "Exhibit A, you said love, present tense. Exhibit B, you keep fucking smiling at me and acting as if everything actually has some god damn normality!" She explained, and it was then and there that Beck noticed how tired her face was. The dark circles under hers eyes that had nothing to do with her running make-up, or any make-up at all. The piercing red lacing web like prints in the white of her eyes, and the speed of which she moved.
Slow.
It was obvious she was deprived of sleep and her sanity.
Now, it was a bittersweet silence as they both paced, careful to maintain a safe distance away from the other.
Until Jade sat back down on the hood of her car, expression sullen. She was one hellava actress that was for damn sure. Beck followed moments after, sighing and leaning heavily against the car.
He kicked at some loose gravel absently, before muttering, "You know," A laugh then escaped his lips, a light sound really. "I think we fight more now, then we did as a couple." Her gaze shifted up. "You think so?" Hesitating, he nodded.
She snorted in distaste," Figures. We end a relationship to end the fighting, when it actually worsens it all." Beck chortled, leaning back on the car. "It's ironic." She sighed.
"Life is just fucked up that way, really f'ed up." Jade nodded in agreement, his words sad, but incredibly true. The awkward tension returned and they avoided each other's eyes, looking in opposite directions.
"Well…" Jade drawled. "I guess I should be heading home before my Dad realizes I'm out here," Beck muttered a yawn and they both stood, staring at the ground as if the asphalt under them was some moving image that somehow withheld both of there gazes.
"Well, bye…" Beck said, as Jade looked up and meeting his soft brown gaze that made her want to melt on the spot. Damn.
"What does this make us? Where are we?" Beck could only smile grimly, a hopeful tint in his soft chocolate eyes. "Friends?" Jade made a noise, and not a positive one at all, more like a disapproving snort.
"Beck Oliver, you're living in a dream land." She stated and he knew every word spoken at least held a smidgen of truth.
"I'm an actor, it comes with the gig," He joked, once again running his fingers through his unruly dark mane of cocoa tresses.
The faint trace of a smile quirked up her sweet, kissable lips. Cut it out Oliver, He fretted to himself.
She cleared her throat, "Yeah." She glanced down before extending her hand.
"Truce, at least for now?" For once, it was her offering the olive branch. Beck smiled, he never thought he'd see the day that Jade would give in to him. He took the hand, incasing it with his own, that was most certainly larger and well, darker. He shook firmly, that familiar burst of energy gathering and seeping into his veins.
"Truce," He agreed nonetheless. He really did want to end this feud with her, it was only hurting them both more then necessary.
But they kept shaking, the energy now coursing up his arms in strings, sending a pleasurable sensation through out him, head to toe. His toes curling in his flimsy shoes.
Jade whimpered and pulled him in for a hug, burying her head in his neck and forcing her eyes shut, marveling in the warmth.
Startled, but reflexes quick, he hugged her waist, quickly skimming over a spot of exposed skin, cool to the touch, but quickly warming on his.
"I'm sorry Jade, I'm so sorry," He muttered into her black tresses, inhaling the scent of rosemary and lemons. Odd, but quite delightful in Beck's eyes.
She reciprocated with an incoherent response and a sniffle, she hated being weak, but after losing the only she'd relied on for years, she's lost a bit of her spunk.
Beck stroked the back of her neck, comforting and consoling, until his breath caught in his throat.
God she was beautiful.
Before he knew it, her breath was ghosting in hot waves over his chapped lips and all previous thoughts of Tori, the break-up, and everything else in the world vanished.
Suddenly, Beck was lacking air, and she was his main supplier. He was a starving man, she was his four-course mean. He was dehydrated, she was his brook.
Neither remembered who closed the distance first, but they both had found themselves leaning in and their lips met in a searing clash of teeth and tongue, graceful, yet sloppy.
And then Beck was alive again. Jade was a hotwire, sizzling beneath his lanky build, his firm grasp on her leaving her skin full of Goosebumps, her skin burning further with every touch.
Hands roamed; ligaments pressed, wrapped, curled. Her body was sprawled against the hood and he kept her there, writhing and wriggling like a worm underneath him, shuddering with every skin on skin contact.
"Beck," She finally gasped out. "We shouldn't…" She trailed off as he brushed her silken locks off of her neck, layering kiss after kiss on the exposed ivory, murmuring 'I know' somewhere in between.
Air was becoming an increasingly large nuisance, her fingers fumbling with his sweatshirt, pushing it off his shoulders and letting it flutter to the ground.
The second his hands roamed over the plains of her stomach, her fingers slid around his wrists, pausing as he looked up at her quizzically, her grey eyes burning holes into the back of his head with an intensity that was burning so deeply, it was as if she was staring at him with silver plates as eyes, almost cat-like even.
She looked incredibly angelic at the moment, even with a reminisce of a hickey on her collarbone. Cute.
"What are we doing Beck?" The brunette asked, eyes searching his face for answer, her arms falling back to her sides and disregarding the void that had returned in the pit of her stomach.
He immediately looked down, almost shamefully, as if he was five and had gotten caught with his hand deep inside the cookie jar, aimlessly searching for the last chocolate chip cookie that was too irresistible to resist. "I don't know Jade, I could ask the same to you,"
"Exactly," She disregarded his last remark, pushing on his chest lightly and he leaned up, allowing her too as well. They sat there, clothes and hair dis-leveled, and Jade was about to remark something she heard a distant squeak.
They both exchanged glanced, thinking the same thing. Seeing the bit of dyed red hair sticking out from behind the door.
That was Cat, and shit, she had seen them.
Because they really shouldn't have, but with their relationship, they always bent the rules. Or made their own.
THEEND
AN: Lol. I was sleepy and crazy when I wrote this, but I love it none the less. B] Sorry for any errors or stuff I didn't catch~! Review please! I work so damn hard on this!
Oh. I also apologize for my use of swear words in this, I just felt it was necessary with the gigantic build up of emotions, ya know?