This is my first Livid fic... I did not have a Beta for this, so if there are any mistakes or grammatical errors, just let me know! Thanks for reading!

italics are flashbacks, straight font is current.

Oh and the Characters belong to Dick Wolf and not me.

David had been with Olivia every step of the pregnancy. The moment she took the test, the doctor's appointment when they got to hear the heartbeat and find out the sex…. and the day she delivered and their lives were changed for forever.

"Olivia, come on. I have to pee and you are taking forever in there. What is taking so long?"

Here David was, holding the little bundle in his arms. His perfect little girl. She had her mommas nose, but her daddy's lips. He thought back to the conversation when they both found out she was pregnant.

"Olivia, I swear I am going to be late. Come on." He banged on the door once more. He put his ear up to the door and waited for a response but could only hear the faint sound of muffled coughing. He knocked once more and when he didn't get a response, he went to open the door. Surprised to find it unlocked, he opened it. The sight he saw scared him more than anything. She had her head in the toilet, her body still shaking as she heaved up once more.

"Olivia, honey, what is wrong?"

"I think I ate something bad. Ha, this is what I get when I eat the leftovers." She joked. But she knew deep down that it wasn't the left over. She felt this way for some time now, and she was late on her period as well. But she didn't want to tell David just yet. She wanted to find out herself first and then share the news.

"You know Olivia… liv, you haven't taken a test in a while. We have the two underneath the sink. Maybe this isn't the food you ate… Maybe we did it.. Finally, ya know?"

She looked up at him and couldn see that he was trying to hide the excitement of her possibly being pregnant. The first time they took a test, it was negative, the second time, negative, the third time they took a test, positive. But she only made it four months into the pregnancy before she miscarried and they both agreed that they wouldn't try for another baby. Not yet and not any time soon.

"David, I don't think this is the time. I mean, we just.. I just.. the last baby… Its too soon."

"Olivia, I know it may seem too soon, but you never know. We haven't exactly been using protection."

Olivia leaned back and rested her head and back against the wall of their bathroom. She stared at him for a moment before smiling.

"We have been having a few good nights" she grinned.

He nudged her shoulder and laughed with her.

"Just good?" She nodded at his question.

"Oh come on. They were great!"

"Oh if you say so…."

David reached underneath the sink and handed her to boxes to the two test.

"Come on, we can take it together"

She raised her eyebrow at his remark and smiled.

"You gonna pee on a stick with me?"

"If it makes you feel better, yeah." He smiled back.

…

David looked up from his daughter and looked over at his wife. Her hair sprawled out across the pillow case, her eyes shut with deep bags underneath, and beads of sweat on her forehead. Tired, exhausted, yet the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He brought his head down and inhaled the scent of his new baby girl. Inhaling deeply and thinking about the day they found out it was a girl.

"David! Come on. I mean it. I will take a cab and a subway and leave you here," Olivia stood up from their couch and held her stomach whispering to the baby. " I get to find out if you are a Beckham or a McKenna"… Olivia rubbed her stomach once more.

"Bye David." Olivia yelled, but not really moving.

"Olivia, we still have two hours before the appointment. Patience dear, the baby isn't going anywhere." He said as he made his way to her and lightly kissed her lips. Then bending down and kissing her stomach through her shirt "What do you say, huh? Are you going to make daddy proud and be a Charlie? We can play catch, we can work on cars, I can make you a ladies man." He grinned after he spoke. But when he looked up, he found a frown amongst her face.

"Hey.. why the long face?" He kissed her forehead and felt her exhale loudly.

"One. We are not naming him Charlie and two, will you be disappointed if we have a girl instead. I mean, you can still play catch with her and teach her about cars and…." Before she could finish, David had his lips on hers and was kissing her deeply. Not pulling back until the both needed air. "Woah.." she said after they both pulled back.

"If we find out today, that we are having a Grace instead of a Charlie, I will lover her deeply, love her immensely and will run off any boy that comes her way." He smiled. He grabbed her hand pulled her towards the door. Making their way down the hall and out to hail a cab to make it to their appointment.

Appointment

Olivia laid back and waited for the tech to squirt that annoying, freezing gel across her stomach. The day they heard the heartbeat was a day that Olivia thought she would never be able to replace with another, but this would most likely take the cake on that. Or rank highly in second place. Olivia was shaken from her thoughts when she heard a woman beginning to speak.

"Hi There. My name is Elise, are we ready to get started?" They both nodded their heads and waited.

David took Olivia's hand and held it tightly, waited for the image of their baby to display on screen.

"Ok, so we are wanting to know the sex, correct?" They once again nodded and waited. The tech looked over at both and spoke. "You know, you two will have the most beautiful baby. Boy or girl." Olivia smiled, yet couldn't form anything more than a "thank you" on her lips.

"Okay… this will be cold" she squirted across Olivia's stomach and watched as she grimaced. "Sorry Mommy…" she smiled lightly. Olivia never took her eyes off of David. Waited to see his reaction. "Look at that…" Olivia turned her head so fast. She could hear the soft, yet fast 'thump. Thump. Thump.' That took place of her baby's heartbeat, but she couldn't tell what she was looking at. Her eyes frantically searching the screen. "That mommy and daddy… is a perfectly healthy… baby girl." Olivia whipped her head back to look at Davids to find tears streaming down his face.

"That's our baby? My baby girl? It's a girl? We're having a little McKenna?" Olivia smiled at the use of the name. She knew deep down that she wanted McKenna and if he truly wanted Grace, she would name her baby Grace for him.
_

David open his eyes after he finished thinking about that day. He looked over to Olivia and noticed that she began to stir and started to wake up. He walked over and laid the baby in her arms. She looked up at David and thanked him without words.

"I wish I could feed her, ya know?" She looked down at the baby, bringing her finger across her little girls cheek.

David leaned down and kissed Olivia's temple and spoke.

" I know baby, I know." That alone made David think back to when her water broke.

It was a rather busy day and they were running around, well as fast as a nine month pregnant woman could run and did the finishing touches to the nursery. Pastel yellows and purples blended throughout the walls of the nursery and her baby's name right above the crib. Above the dresser to her little girl were framed photos of her and David feet painted onto a picture, with the quote "We will never leave your side, alone, or scared. We will walk the world together." One small quote David had thought of after they framed the photos.

It was the moment that they decided to lay down for a nap that Olivia began yelling for David across the apartment.

"David…. David. DAVID!" she yelled as he came running into the room.

"What? Is it time? Now?" David asked, but didn't need her answer as he looked down and saw the puddle beneath his wife. "Ok. It is time. We have the suitcases in the car, the carseat in the car… Are we forgetting anything?" he asked as he walked out of the bedroom and into the livingroom. Olivia follow suit.

"David, can I shower first?"

David looked her and was extremely confused.

"Shower? Now? You want to shower? Now? Liv, your water just broke!"

"Yes, but David, they say it could be hours until the baby comes and I feel dirty." She said as tears made their way down her face. She didn't mean to cry, but the hormones always made her life this.

"Hey… hey. Okay okay. A shower. You can shower, but when you are done, we are heading straight to the hospital. Okay?" she smiled and the tears stopped instantly.

"Deal! And David…. Can you wash my hair?" he smiled at her question. He washed her hair for her one time after she had gotten sick and was too weak to do it, that she had requested it from then on out.

One shower, one hair wash and a drive to the hospital. They were now on their way to deliver a baby.

Hours into the delivery

"Come on Olivia, I need you to push." The doctor yelled at her. "The baby is in distress and we need to get her out." Olivia began pushing again and again, but she was beyond tired, beyond uncomfortable and she was ready to see her baby.

David wasn't all too sure what happened, but he was being pushed out of the room as Olivia was being taken to the OR. A nurse walked up and grabbed David as they began to suit him up. What seem like forever, he finally way able to see Olivia again.

"David. What's happening? What's wrong?" David leaned down and kissed her head and began pushing her loose hairs out of her face.

"Nothing baby, they just have to take her C-section because she isn't ready to see the world yet."

As much as Olivia wanted to believe him, she couldn't.

It was all in slow motion for Olivia. Doctors were talking to other doctors and nurses were trying to talk to David, but nobody was talking to her. Why wasn't anyone saying anything to her? Olivia could see that the nurse and he were talking, but she couldn't make out words. Her baby was delivered, no cries were heard… She couldn't hear anything at all. No words from her husband as he began to cry and say sorry, no words from the nurses as they passed by…. And lastly… No cry from her baby. All she could feel were the light kisses from David on her forehead.
_

David watched as his wife silently cried while holding his baby girl. He watched as his wife cradled their only baby. Their only little baby, the one who spent nine months growing in her stomach, only to come full term… and not be here.

"Olivia, baby I am so sorry." He kissed her again.

Olivia cradled the baby closer and began to sob.

"We will never hear her cry, or change her diaper. We will never be able to get up in the middle of the night with her and I …. I will never be able to feed her my milk and sing to her. You… you won't ever get to hold her and teach her… teach her any sports. David, why? Why us? We…. We did everything right." She sobbed lightly. He wishes he had the words to make her feel better, but all he could think of was… things happen in this life that we can't even begin to understand.

David slipped into bed with her and held as she cried. He had to watch a nurse bring his baby girl into this world, and he watched a nurse take her out.

So here it is... I apologize for the inhumanity of my actions... But really, I am sorry, This is something I thought of and wrote it out just now. Thanks for reading...