Strong Warning: This story deals with BDSM, D/s and very kinky situations – it's intended for mature audiences.
Authors' Note: This story is for my beloved Nonnally, who came up with the idea for this story and graciously gave it to me to write.
…
The curser flickers at the end of the final sentence on the page as a blue eye unblinkingly stares at the screen.
Stretching his back out, he clasps his hands together, leaning forwards and then falling back into his chair. Resting his elbow on his desk, he places his cheek in the palm of his hand and sighs. It's ten in the morning and he's already tired; he's been in the office since seven this morning to catch up on what he couldn't finish last night. Rolling his shoulders, he reaches back and massages the side of his neck as several new emails ping up on his screen. Exhaling softly, he wishes there could be more hours in the day as he starts to go through them.
This has become a daily routine for Ciel.
Funtom, the world's foremost toy and gaming company is run by the Phantomhive family, more importantly by his father, Vincent. Desperate to make a name for himself outside of his fathers' shadow and to prove that he didn't get this job solely on nepotism, Ciel is determined to work as hard as he can to prove his worth.
He groans as he reads each email, there is a problem with the design of the new plush toy, marketing need a sign off for their new promotional ad campaign and so on. His days are always like this, with more work than he has time but he likes it this way, or at least, he used to. He's been feeling tense these last few months, stressed and little overwhelmed, but the work just keeps mounting.
There is a knock on the door and he smiles wryly to himself.
"Come in." He calls out. The door opens and a woman pops her head through the door. Adjusting her circular framed glasses, she hesitantly enters the office. "Mey-Rin, you're late." He chides her. She shifts uncomfortably in her stance as she remains by the door. "Well come in." He barks. Jolting, she quickly ushers herself over to him, stopping just in front of his desk.
"Mister Ciel, Sir, I've come to give you your schedule for the day." She mutters as she shakes slightly. Her nervous behavior completely amuses Ciel, especially as if there is a tyrant in this company, it would certainly not be him.
"Mey, you can just call me Ciel." He smiles.
"O-okay."
"However, in the future, I will not accept tardiness."
"Yes Sir, I mean, Ciel." She nods.
"Great, now what is my schedule for today?"
"Um," She takes the iPad she is carrying out from under her arm and runs her finger over the screen to pull up his calendar. "At eleven you have a meeting with the Paris distributor as he is in town, from twelve to one -thirty you have conference call with the London office to discuss manufacturing of the new Bitter Rabbit plush toy. Then at two, you have lunch with Miss Midford."
"Did you book me a table at Butterfly?"
"Yes."
"Overlooking the bay?"
"Yes, it's all been arranged exactly per your instruction."
"Fantastic."
"Afterwards, you have a meeting with your father-"
"What's that about?" He interrupts her.
"He didn't say, he just told me to book out a few hours with you."
"Typical." He snorts. "All right, I can only assume that it's about the marketing for this new roll out." He pauses for a moment as he thinks to himself, "Okay, can you gather all the potential promotional data you can get your hands on from the sales department? I need to be prepared before I go in."
"Y-yes."
"Great. What's next?"
"That's it for the rest of the day."
"Wow, light load, it must be Wednesday." He sighs sarcastically. Mey-Rin nods and excuses herself as she walks out of the office. Ciel watches her leave as he picks up a pen from the side and taps it down on the desk.
Drawing in a deep breath, he readies himself for the rest of his day.
...
"God, I'm exhausted." Ciel sighs as he reclines into the plush cushion of the sofa, letting his back sink into it.
It is finally the end of the day and reluctantly dragging himself out of the office, he makes his way back home.
Although he barely spends any time here, Ciel loves to be in his apartment. Everything about it is lavish, from the exquisite view overlooking the city, the lush navy blue furniture to the cream colored fixtures and accents that decorate the place. He meticulous designs everything exactly to his tastes, with not one thing out of place.
As he stretches out his back, he smiles as a tall blond holding a black mug comes into his eye line.
"Aw baby, long day?" He coos as he bends over in front of Ciel, handing him the mug. "Do you wanna tell me about it?"
"There really isn't much to say, it was long and stressful."
"So, normal?" He guesses. Ciel nods as he looks down at the liquid inside the mug.
"What kind of tea is this?" He asks as he examines the liquid carefully. The blond shrugs as he takes a seat next to him, throwing his arms over the backrest.
"Whatever was in the purple tin." He replies as he runs his hand through his hair, checking the tips for split ends. Ciel looks at him and sighs.
"That's my white peony tea."
"So?"
"So, who taught you how to make tea Alois? It's a white tea and this looks brown." He snips.
"God, you're so testy right now, tea is fucking tea. Be grateful that I actually made it."
"You're right, I'm sorry; I'm just so stressed out right now. My dad has been piling on the work."
"Take a break for a while." He suggests and Ciel shakes his head.
"You know I can't. We've got this huge ad campaign for the roll out of our new toy coming up and I'm in charge of it. I'm the only one who can take care of it and do it right."
"But you can't go on like this either."
"It's nothing I can't handle." Ciel shrugs.
"You're gonna burn out if you're not careful." He warns.
"I'll be fine."
Alois hums softly as he turns to him and smiles, poking him in the ribs playfully. Ciel winces at the jolt of pain and bats his hand away.
"When's the last time you had a little fun?" Alois inquires, lowering his eyes as he leans closer to him.
"Fun?"
"You know, went out, got drunk, and woke up in Golden Gate Park without your clothes on?"
"Um, I think that's just you." He mutters as he puts the mug to his lips.
"Okay, you're right." He agrees. "Then when's the last time you go laid?"
"Excuse me?" Ciel splutters as he chokes on his sip of tea.
"You know, l.a.i.d."
"I don't know, a while." He answers, placing the mug down on the coffee table in front.
"How long is a while?"
"I don't know, a couple of months. Let it go."
"Seriously? Not since Sieglinde?"
"What since me? I heard my name." Sieglinde pokes her head through the door. Her dark green eyes narrow as they look at the pair on the couch suspiciously. They don't answer, which causes her face to scrunch up into frown. "You have better not be talking shit about me." She smiles, "Did I say that right? Talking shit?" She wonders as she repeats the term again silently to herself, trying to perfect her American pronunciation.
"You're getting better at smack talk. I'm so proud." Alois grins as she comes into the room, tossing her long chocolate colored hair over her shoulders.
"Ah ja, danke. I have been in this country for a few years now; I want to learn everything I can." She beams.
"I can't believe you're learning from Alois though, he can barely speak English himself." Ciel teases.
"Ha ha ha ha bitch, very funny." Alois pouts, folding his arms around his chest as Ciel smirks at him.
"Really, what were you talking about?" Sieglinde asks as she walks over to Ciels' side. Smoothing down the pleats on the skirt of her forest green dress, she sits down on the floor beside the coffee table, just next to Ciels' knee.
"We're just talking about the last time Ciel got any and apparently, you were it."
"Aww, still carrying a torch for me shorty?" She giggles.
"Absolutely not. I think we all agree that our relationship was an unmitigated disaster."
"Ja, seconded." She smiles.
"Motion carried." Alois simpers, clasping his hands together. "Couldn't you guys just be fuck buddies like normal human beings?"
"Fuck buddies?" She repeats, "Was ist fuck buddies?"
"It's when two friends just have sex with no relationship or strings attached." Alois answers with a cheeky wink.
"Oh, no thank you." She shakes her head.
"Hey." Ciel protests.
"I mean no offense. You were a very good time in bed but you are obviously not for me."
"Jesus." Ciel groans as he buries his reddening face into his hands. Alois slaps him on the side of his shoulder.
"I'm going to remember that for life!" He laughs loudly.
Ciel grumbles as he rubs his face in his hands.
"Look," He begins, "there's just no room in my life for anything at moment. I'm just really busy with work."
"It's always work with you. You know that was one of the problems in our relationship."
"There was more than one problem?" Alois mutters under his breath.
"There were many problems but work isn't what ended it." She admits.
"Oh, do tell." Alois looks at her excitedly as Ciel shakes his head frantically. She nods with a wry smile and her eyes travel back to Alois.
"Another time." She brushes him off.
"No fair." He pouts.
Ciel sighs as he rolls his neck, sitting back against the cushion. Reaching back, he rubs the top of his shoulder.
"Well, if you don't want sex, then you'll need to find some other way to relax." Alois says, swatting his hand away from his neck. Shifting forward, he places his hands on Ciels' shoulders and starts to rub them.
"I wouldn't know how." Ciel exhales as he enjoys the feel of Alois' hands working the tension in his shoulders.
"You can stop being such a control freak for one."
"I'm not a control freak."
"Yes, you so are. You need to control everything."
"That's not true." Ciel contests.
"You controlled everything in our relationship." Sieglinde says and Ciels' head whips over to her.
"No I didn't, did I?"
Sieglinde nods and Ciel falls silent for a moment.
"You decided all the films that we saw, where we went to dinner and everything we did together."
"Not to mention that you're stressed about work but you don't want to do anything about it because, as you said, you are the only one who can take care of it and do it right." Alois cuts in and Ciel shrugs.
"Well that's because it's true."
"Oh, remember there was that one time where we all wanted to go to Bimbo's but you didn't like who was playing so we went somewhere else instead?" Sieglinde interjects.
"That's because they were bad."
"What about the fact that we always have to come to your place instead of one of ours?" Alois adds.
"Your place is always a mess and Sieglinde lives in a dorm." Ciel reasons.
Alois rolls his eyes at that comment and he throws his hands up in the air.
"You know what, I give up; you're right, you are not a control freak." Alois declares with a huff.
"Ciel, you know I love you but you need to loosen up every once and a while." Sieglinde sighs as she rests her head on his knee.
"Am I really that bad?" Ciel wonders aloud as he looks at both of them. They nod solemnly and his face falls slightly over the realization of how true the statement actually is.
So what if he controls everything? What if everything needs to be controlled? Then mistakes are not made and accidents do not happen and if they do, there is only one person to blame. This is something Ciel strongly believes in and this is how he chooses to live his life. Everything has to be just right, and have its exact place. He strives for structure and order in world that he finds far too chaotic for his tastes.
However, he watches Alois and Sieglinde, he sees how they live their lives and he finds himself jealous over the fact that they can live without responsibility and with a carefree approach that he can only dream of. If Ciel is to be honest with himself, he knows there is a part of him that is curious; a part of him that wants to know what would it be like? What would it feel like to lose himself just once, to shed his inhibitions?
"You are that bad but, as your friends, we still love you." Alois smiles.
"Well thanks." He sighs.
"You need to give control over to someone else for once." Sieglinde suggests.
"Oh?"
Landing on a thought, her eyes light up as she bolts upright. Sitting forward, she motions for Alois to come over to her. He bends across Ciel who sits back and she cups her hand to his ear. His eyes widen as listens to what she's suggesting.
"Holy shit." He gasps, clapping his hand over his mouth. "That's such a good idea." He agrees through his fingers.
"What is it?" Ciel inquires as he pushes Alois back.
"But do you think he could handle it?" Sieglinde wonders.
"Oh absolutely not." Alois shakes his head.
"What is it?"
"Should I tell him?" She smiles.
"Will someone tell me already?"
"We bet we know a way you can give control over to someone else." She smirks.
"I highly doubt that."
"Do you want to know or not?" Alois grins.
"Fine."
"We think you need a professional." She winks at him.
Ciels' jaw drops open but he cannot manage to get any sound to come out.
"L-like a prostitute?" He finally manages.
She shakes her head. "No, of course not."
"Then what?"
"A dominatrix." Alois giggles.
Ciel sits up immediately, his eye widens as he glares at the two.
"You cannot be serious?"
She nods. "We're very serious."
"You two are perverts."
"Perverts? You've come with me to Folsom Street Fair."
"That was for you Alois, not me."
"Folsom Street Fair?" Sieglinde repeats as she tries to keep up with the conversation.
"It's a leather fair on Folsom Street, we have it every year here." Alois answers.
"Leather fair? You have these things?" She pauses as she smiles, shaking her head, "Only in San Francisco."
"How would you know you wouldn't like it, if you never tried?" He asks and Ciel crosses his arms.
"I just do."
"You can be so stubborn sometimes." Sieglinde sighs.
"I don't think that my stubbornness has anything to do with it."
"Just try it once, that's all we ask." Alois requests.
"Oh, I know just the person. They are the very best in the city, I met them when they gave a lecture at my University." Sieglinde enthuses.
"No and fuck you for thinking I would even consider such a thing." Ciel replies sharply.
Alois looks over to Sieglinde who nods.
"See, I knew he wouldn't go for it." She shrugs.
"Typical Ciel, never willing to try anything." Alois agrees.
"I know what you're doing and it won't work."
"He was like this in our relationship, so dull." She adds.
"I'm not falling for it."
"It's cause you're scared." Alois concludes.
"I'm not scared."
"Yes you are, you're scared that it'll actually work."
"That's ridiculous."
"Is it?"
"You know that makes perfect sense, you won't lose control because you're scared of what will happen if you do."
"Don't give me that pseudo psychology Alois."
"Then prove us wrong." He goads.
"No."
Draping her arms on the tops of his thighs, Sieglinde slinks forwards on his lap. Her large doe eyes are wide as they begin to glisten with the tears that start to form. Her gaze mesmerizes Ciel as her bottom lip protrudes.
"Ciel, please? For me?" She pouts, "You owe me and you know why." She finishes.
"You cannot be serious?"
"I am calling in this favor, unless, you want me to tell?"
Ciel studies her for a moment and she slides off of him with a knowing smile.
"You wouldn't?" He breathes out.
"I might." She counters and with that, Ciel knows that she's got him and there is nothing he can do about it.
"Damn it, all right." He concedes through gritted teeth.
"Knorke! I will make all of the arrangements." Sieglinde grins.
"No, wait a minute; I said I'd go, so why do you need to arrange it?"
"Because if I don't, I know you won't." She replies sternly. Ciel exhales loudly as he slams his hands down on his knees. He starts to get up and Sieglinde scoots aside for him.
"Where are you going?" Alois asks curiously as Ciel picks up the mug of tea from the coffee table and steps towards the hall.
"To make a proper cup of tea, the one you made is shit." He retorts, disappearing through the hallway.
As soon as he is fully out of the room, Alois turns to Sieglinde; she has a sly smile playing on her lips as he starts to giggle profusely.
"Oh my God, you did it!"
"I did." She grins.
"I like you when you're devilish."
"Is this a compliment? I don't understand, devilish?"
"Yes, it's a compliment."
"Okay, thank you."
"You're welcome." He smiles as he thinks to himself for a moment. "Seriously though, why does he owe you?"
Sieglinde draws in a deep breath, holding it in her chest for a moment before she exhales.
"There are some things Alois, which even you should not know."
"What does that mean?" He wonders and then gasps, "Is it dirty? I bet it's dirty."
"Perhaps, perhaps not." She shrugs. "But once you know, you can never un-know."
"No fucking fair!" He pouts and she puts her fingers to her lips as she giggles.
"All will be revealed in time." She smiles. "Let's just see if he goes."
...
It's only been a week since he agreed to do this, and already, he is feeling anxious as he walks down Mission. Sieglinde and Alois made all of the arrangements; Ciel didn't have to do a thing, much to his frustration. They decided everything, from the location, date and time down to who he is to see. Hating to leave work in the middle of the afternoon, Ciel grumbles to himself, knowing that he will have so much to catch up on when he gets back. A fact that annoys him deeply, especially as it will throw his tightly constructed schedule out of the window.
"I shouldn't have let them talk me into this." He sighs as he pulls up the collar of his coat, trying to hide his face from the other pedestrians walking towards him; anonymity is key if he is really going to go through with this. What would his father say if he found out where he was? Ciel shudders as he tries to shake that thought from his mind. It isn't too late to turn around; he thinks to himself. No, he knows that they've already paid for this session and that he'd never hear the end of it if he didn't go, especially from Sieglinde, who had a secret to tell.
His eye looks around nervously as he makes his way down towards an industrial estate, a strange place for someone like him to be going but here he is.
Shoving his hand into his pocket, he pulls out a small slip of paper with Sieglindes' handwriting on it.
Mission Street Co.
221 Mission Street.
1:30 appointment with Beast
He looks up at the numbers of each building he passes and he sees it. A tall black painted metal building, it's unassuming, despite the color, fitting in perfectly amongst its surroundings. Looking around to ensure there is no-one watching, Ciel makes his way down the short pathway and, opening the large glass door, he slips in.
Standing in the large reception area, he is instantly taken aback by how modern and sleek it is. The whole place is covered in brightly polished chrome and a cream décor with a glittery black granite floor. He wasn't completely sure what he was to expect but he assumes that when someone says dungeon, it's meant to look like, well, a dungeon, grimy and medieval.
His eye goes over to the curved ebony counter towards the front, it stands out but it's not out of place. A woman in a tight, figure hugging charcoal pinstriped suit stands behind the counter, her head tilts to the side as she looks over to Ciel curiously.
"Good afternoon, can I help you?" She smiles. Ciel takes a few hesitant steps towards the counter as he continues to look around.
"I don't – I don't know if I'm in the right place." He begins.
"What's your name and let me see if I can help you."
"Ciel." He replies softly.
She looks over to the screen and types in his name, then smiles and nods.
"Yes, you're in the right place. You have three sessions already paid for, is that right?"
"Three?"
"Yes, that's what is says right here."
"Perfect." He snorts to himself, knowing this is all down to Sieglinde and Alois. "Well, then I guess I do."
"All right. Well, your appointment is down the stairs; go through the hall, third door on the left." She motions behind her. Ciel nods and heads down the stairs. "Have fun." She calls after him.
As he goes down the hall, he notices how distinctly quiet it is. Sure there is music playing in the hallway itself but he thought, or rather assumed, he would hear the sounds of people screaming in either agony or pleasure. He isn't sure what he has gotten himself into, especially as nothing here is quite as it seems. From the location, the name and the building itself, nothing adds up to whatever depravity he allows himself to imagine.
Shrugging off that thought, he finds the third door on the left.
Ciels' hand balls in to a fist to knock but he isn't entirely sure if he even wants to go in. He feels sick in the pit of his stomach, nervous and jittery, he wants to turn around and he wants to leave. He curses Alois and Sieglinde under his breath for convincing him to do this but another part of him is curious, what's awaiting him behind that door?
Dropping his hand for a moment, he thinks about what it is he wants to do.
Should I stay or should I go? He thinks to himself as he wavers. Drawing in a deep breath, Ciel screws up the courage to knock on the door, well, I've come this far, he reasons. However, after a moment, the door opens slightly. Startled, he steps back and waits for a minute to see if anyone will emerge but no one does. Lifting his hand, his fingers touch the cold wood of the door and he hesitates. Finally, he pushes it open and walks through.
The room is dark, though dimly lit with a few lamps scattered about. Ciels' eye darts around as it tries to absorb everything it sees. The place looks like something out of a Victorian period drama that one would see on PBS, which surprises him. This isn't what he assumed a dungeon would look like.
There is a red velvet chaise longue in the corner and an ornately carved wooden table in the middle of the room, with two antique looking leather chairs on either side of it. At the back, there is a large decorative desk with someone leaning against it. He is dressed in a tight black rubber t-shirt that leaves little to the imagination, highlighting every curve of his torso. He also has on matching skintight rubber trousers, which sit just below the sharp arc of his hipbones. His choppy black hair falls neatly around his head and his face is covered with a simple rubber mask that sits on his cheeks. Leaning back, he crosses his legs as his black-gloved fingers impatiently drum along the edge of the desk.
Upon seeing him, Ciels' pulse begins to quicken as he swallows hard. This man is tall; he is lean but obviously built and very intimidating. Even though there is some kind of music playing in the background, Ciel can hear his heart thumping loudly between his ears, it's almost deafening.
"You must be Ciel?" The man wonders aloud as he bends forward slightly to get a better look at the young man standing in front of him. "I am Sebastian."
"I'm, um, I'm here to see Beast?" He responds nervously.
"Well that's a pity, especially as your appointment is with me."
"But you're a man." His words spill out of his mouth before he can formulate them properly.
"I am."
"Then I think there's been a mistake."
"What do you mean?"
"I was told that I'm here to see a dominatrix called, Beast."
"And I was told that you are here to see me." He says languidly.
"That's just great; she trolled me." Ciel mutters to himself. "Well, I'm sorry about all of this and I don't want to waste any more of your time, I should go."
Pushing himself off of the desk, Sebastian walks over to the center of the room and takes a seat on one of the antique looking black leather chairs.
"What's the hurry? You've already paid for three sessions, you may as well stay." He says, crossing his legs. He rests his elbows on his knees, lacing his fingers together as he leans forward. Ciel stands uncomfortably in front of him as he feels as though he is being examined.
"No, I didn't, my so called friends did and in any case, I thought it was with a woman named Beast."
"Beast is busy, you got me."
"No offense, but I didn't want to come here in the first place."
"Then why are you here? You didn't have to come, no one forced you did they?" Ciel is quiet and a smile finds its way onto Sebastians' lips as he regards him. Even though this young man is clearly nervous, he still wears an air of haughty pride on his face, something he would love to cut down to size, if given half the chance. "Well?"
"Well what?" Ciel replies curtly.
"Why are you here? You could lie but I wouldn't, I can see straight through it."
"I was curious." Ciel admits honestly.
"Curious?" Sebastian asks with an arched brow.
"You mean to tell me that people don't come here out of curiosity?"
"Of course they do but you look like it's something more than mere curiosity. Tell me, what really brought you here? You can be confessional, I won't share your secrets." He smiles as he leans back into the chair.
Ciel sighs as he switches his weight from his left hip to his right, feeling wholly uncomfortable by the situation he has now found himself in.
"I'm stressed out." He replies with a heavy sigh.
"So are a lot of people."
"My level of stress is more than most."
"And how old are you?"
"I'm twenty one."
"You are much too young to be so stressed out." Sebastian assesses.
"I just have a lot going on in my life."
"I see." He nods. "And what else?"
"My friends said I'm stressed because I like to control everything."
Sebastian rests his elbow on the armrest, he strokes his chin with his index finger as he continues to stare at Ciel, his gaze focused and unwavering which unnerves the young man.
"And do you?" He asks and Ciel nods. "I see, so this stress and a need to control everything brought you here?" Ciel nods again. "What were you looking for?"
"A release." Ciel breathes out.
"A release?" Sebastian repeats curiously.
"It's just..." He drifts off, unsure if he even wants to continue this conversation.
"Yes?"
"I just want to know what it's like."
"What what is like?"
"I want to know what it's like to not be in control. I want to feel what that's like." He confesses despite himself.
Sebastian smirks at that statement, uncrossing his legs as he starts to stand up.
"So, you've come to see if you can actually give control to someone else, is that it?" He surmises aloud as he walks over to Ciel, standing just behind him.
"Yes." Ciel almost whispers as he shudders slightly, feeling Sebastians' warm breath breeze past the back of his neck.
"Well, I can help you with that." He pauses. "May I take your coat?"
Ciel nods as Sebastian starts to take off his coat, gently tugging at the sleeves and pulling it off his shoulders. Keeping his head straight, Ciels' eye follows Sebastian as he walks over to one of the chairs, laying his coat over the headrest.
"I'm – I'm not really into this sort of thing."
"That's fine, I can still help you." He shrugs as he turns back around, slowly sauntering back over to him. He circles around him, titling his head to the side as he eyes him up and down. Ciel is frozen to the spot, unsure of what to do.
"How?" He manages to get out. Sebastian pauses, stopping just behind Ciels' shoulder.
"I can help you find the release you seek."
"How do you, how would we go about this?"
Sebastians' hand delicately ghosts down the side of his arm and stops at his wrist; Ciel shivers at the contact but remains as still as he can.
"This doesn't have to be about anything more than what you want it to be. If you want to do nothing but talk, we can just talk. If you want to play, we can play. It's as simple as that." He answers; his thumb and index finger wrap themselves around the thin bone of Ciels' wrist, as he gauges the width.
"How would we, um, how would we play?" He asks as Sebastian slowly draws his arm to the small of his back, holding it there lightly. Ciels' breath hitches in his throat but he doesn't resist, allowing his arm to be pinned back. He's being sized up, measured, he knows it but he can't bring himself to move away.
"Well, that's up to you. You can decide what scenes we play out or you can leave it to me, I can be as hard or as soft as you'd like." Sebastian purrs with a voice as dark and sweet as honey.
"Scenes?"
"Every session is a scene, it's like we're actors only instead of a stage and a script; we just play out whatever fantasy you would like try."
"I don't have any fantasies." Ciel admits.
"What, nothing at all?"
"Not really no, I'm usually busy thinking about work." Ciel sighs and Sebastian shrugs.
"Well then, I'll have to help you with that too." He decides as he gently takes Ciels' other wrist, pulling his arm and pinning it behind his back with the other.
Holding both wrists still with one hand and stepping back, Sebastian admires the look of Ciel. He nods to himself as he likes what he sees, particularly how his perfectly placed wrists fit against the small of his back. A simple knot would hold them together wonderfully, he smirks to himself. As he continues to regard him, Sebastian especially enjoys how this young man still stands proudly, with his back perfectly straight and his chin held high, despite his current position. He is clearly nervous but his determination to remain un-phased by him is appealing.
How he would love to see such a proud creature on his knees before him and to see those full lips part as they beg for him.
"I'm still not sure about all this." Ciel exhales as he feels the grip on his wrists tighten slightly.
"Give me the three sessions; let me see if I can change your mind." He whispers into his ear as he lets go and moves away from him.
Ciel arms fall to his sides as he thinks to himself, what should he do? He realizes that he can leave at any time. He can just walk out and chalk the whole thing up to experience, and never look back. He can, but then again, he just can't seem to budge.
This is not at all how he thought this would go and the whole situation has left him utterly confused. Not one muscle in his body is listening to what his mind is trying to say and he's entranced, he can't help himself. This man is the devil and Ciel knows it, it's as though he's being seduced, tempted and teased by someone who embodies nothing but pure sex and he's falling for it. Ciel can feel his body start to work against him as it involuntarily responds to his touch, it's visceral, something he cannot control, try as he might.
But then again, isn't this what he wants? Isn't this something he would like to experience for once?
"Will it hurt?"
"Only if you want it to." Sebastian grins. "We can start slowly, build up your tolerance and go from there."
"Okay."
"Does this mean that you're willing to give me a try?"
Ciel hesitates for a moment then nods.
"Yes." He sighs.
"Wonderful."
"H-how do we, um, start?"
"We won't be doing anything today. You need to settle your nerves first and make sure that this is what you really want to try." Sebastian walks over to the chair to collect Ciels' coat.
"I think it is."
"Then come back when you're sure. When you're sure, make another appointment and our three sessions can begin."
"Okay." Ciel agrees as Sebastian hands him his coat and holds out his arm towards the door. Finally able to command his body to move, Ciel starts to stagger towards the door. Sebastian remains standing in the middle of the room; his eyes narrow as he watches Ciel start to leave.
"I hope to see you again, Ciel." He smiles as Ciel shuts the door behind him.
Leaving the room, he starts to walk down the hall, and then halts for a second as his whole body convulses.
What the hell was that? He wonders to himself as he begins to quickly put his coat on, his mind is hazy; it was as though he had been put under a spell and he is now just waking up from it. Finishing the last button, he looks over his shoulder back towards the door. Shaking his head, he marches back up the stairs, he has to go, he must leave this place.
As he goes through the reception, the woman behind the desk looks over at him.
"Hey, wait!" She calls after him and he stops, turning to her.
"Would you like to book your next session?"
"No, I'm not sure if I'll be coming back."
"That's fine." She smiles. "Here," She pulls out a card from the small holder next to her computer screen, "take this, just in case you change your mind. You have three sessions already paid for; it'd be a shame to waste them." She offers the card to Ciel who accepts it.
"Thank you."
"All right then." She nods. "Have a good afternoon."
"Thanks, you too."
Pushing open the glass door, Ciel leaves the building and, turning right; he storms down the street towards the BART station. Pulling his phone out of his coat pocket, he stops in front of a chain link fence and scrolls through his contacts. Finding who he is looking for, he taps the screen and holds the phone up to his ear as it rings.
"Ciel, na, alles klar?" Sieglinde answers.
"No alles not klar." He huffs.
"Oh, what happened?"
"I left."
"Aw, that's a shame."
"You lied to me Sieglinde." He growls.
"Did I? How so?"
"Don't play innocent with me, Beast?"
"Ah, so you met Sebastian?" She giggles.
"Sieglinde, I swear to God. What were you thinking?"
"I was thinking that Sebastian is the best and if you were going to try this, then you should have the best."
"Is this some German version of a practical joke?"
"What? No." She simpers. "I just thought that you would be more amenable if you had a man."
"That's not funny."
"So I take it it did not happen?"
"No, it did not." He grunts.
"Well at least you went."
"But I'm not going back. I tried it, it didn't work so can we leave it now?"
"Ja, ja, all right." She agrees. Ciel pauses for a second and then lets out a heavy sigh.
"Sieglinde, you're the only one who knows."
"I know and I'm not going to say anything, I promise."
"Okay."
"I have class now, can I come by later?"
"Why not? That'll allow me to kill you in person." He snorts.
"Haha, okay shorty, I will see you later so you can kill me, tschüss."
"Bye."
He hangs up.
Still holding the card in his hand, he flicks it between his fingers, leaning his back against the chain link fence as the thinks to himself for a moment. Tapping the sharp corner with his index finger, he turns his head towards the building and then rolls it up to the sky as he closes his eye. Breathing out, he can still feel the slight pressure of Sebastians' hand on his wrists and he shudders.
Opening his eye, he looks down at the card, he sighs as he dials the number on the front.
"Yes, hello. I'd like to make an appointment please," He pauses for a moment as he draws in a deep breath to steady himself, "for Sebastian. Tomorrow at 1.30, my name is Ciel. Great, thank you."
He hangs up the phone, slipping it back into his pocket along with the card.
Ciel hated lying to Sieglinde. The whole thing makes him feel sick but he can't tell her the truth, especially if is gives her the satisfaction of being right. Is she actually right? Is this really what he needs?
At this point he doesn't know nor does he care. He can just feel it, like a pull in his chest, his whole body aches to go back and he has only just left. Perhaps he really is under a spell? Maybe it's the mystery of the place and its unassuming look or maybe it's the intoxicating scent of leather that hung in the air, commanding him like a potent aphrodisiac. Ciel shakes his head; of course it isn't any of those things. He knows without a shadow of a doubt that it's the undeniable allure of Sebastian that draws him in.
Popping his collar up over his neck, he stuffs his hands in his coat pockets and walks down the street. As he heads down, he keeps replaying the last few words Sebastian said to him in his head. To come back when he is sure, but is he sure?
The idea of it all is daunting. He isn't even sure if he can handle it but there is something about Sebastian that made the fine hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. There is something about him that coaxes him to try it; despite every doubt in is mind.
A wry smile makes its way onto Ciels' lips as he continues down the street, his heart races with excitement and a shiver runs down his spine, is he sure?
Yes.