The twins were locked in a heated staring contest. Voldemort and his cronies off to the side, tapping their feet impatiently. "One of you blink so we can get this over with!" Fred felt his eyes begin to water.
George flipped them all off, holding his intense stare; meanwhile one of the death eaters fake boobs fell off, everyone gasping.
The twins took the opportunity to stun the others, running away to safely so they could live out their sexual fantasies together.
Hairy Potty waddled up with his janitorial tools, forgetting about the intense battle and shuffling away for Harry Potter to make his grand entrance.
On either side of Harry was his loyal lackies, Ron and Hermione. Draco sighed forlornly across the Great Hall "Oh, Harry. If only you could notice my tight twink butt."
Harry s gaydar started pinging wildly, his wand dragging him off toward the great hall, jabbing Draco right up the ass. Tight He said making a Lenny face.
With that one lenny the war ended, enemies becoming friends, teachers becoming neighbors. Snape turned to Dumbledore. 'Notice me Senpai!" tackling him to the ground.
Much gay occurred after the war, Voldemort embracing his inner drag queen and winning a pageant through sheer will and gunpoint.
And so it was written in history, that Harry Potter was the boy who queered.