Chronicles of Stony

by Spoot Poot

I reposted this due to another issue with someone spamming my reviews. ANYWAY! This is just for fun. It's 80% HEADCANON! So leave me alone. It's some happy little STONY love. Read or don't.

1. The List

Spoot: YAAAASSSS BATCH!

Tony: hi.

Spoot: Oh right, he's in this. WELCOME BACK!

The List

Steve marched into the living room of the compound with his hands over his ears. There was music going, as usual but this time things were askew. Instead of it being blasted from the lab, it was being blasted from that very room at levels that would make one's ears bleed. Tony was standing in the middle of the room with his arms out in triumph. "NIRVANA!" He shouted. "WHAAATTT?"

"NIRVANA!"

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"

"NIRV-" Tony hit the power button, causing the music to die. "Nirvana." He said calmly as he got that smirk on his face. "I don't get it." Steve barked as he smoothed back his hair, trying to get back those groomed good looks. "You can't just blare some music and call it Nirvana. That was not peaceful in any way! That was not even music! That was...gutter trash!"

"Nnnooo...that was Nirvana."

"Tony you and I clearly have two different def-"

"The band's name is Nirvana Dorito." Steve was taken aback for a second, searching his mind for why this all was relevant. Before Tony could say anything he caught on. "My list...you looked at my list..."

"Looked...stole it from your back pocket while you were in the shower...whatever." Tony scoffed out with a chuckle. "You really need to add more to it. I mean...Elvis. AC/DC...Stone Temple Pilots! Nothing?"

"I have no idea who they are."

"Ozzy?"

"Nope."

"Its like I'm talking to my grandpa. I gotta really catch you up to speed here. No seriously, you need to get out more." He held up the little book Steve kept on him at all times, and then snatched it away as he reached for it. He opened it to the correct page and began, "Rocky? Balboa? Oh man you are so outta the loop. Thai food huh? Never had it?"

"No..." Steve huffed out in irritation. "I've never had it. And I don't know who Rocky is and I've never listened to Nirvana. Now give it back..."

"You did. Nirvana, you just listened to it. Yah that was it."

"Well I'm glad. Now I know what to avoid so when the new stuff hits shelves I can look the other way." Tony sucked on his teeth as Steve finished his rant. "Yikes...yeah the lead singer has been dead a while...and people are still kinda raw over it...soooo...best keep that to yourself." He threw an arm over the other man's shoulder and pulled him in. "Here's an idea. I keep this...and read it over. I'll add a few things and cross some off...like you did with Star Wars. How was it by the way?"

"Predictable and the last book irritated me."

"Book? Ooohhh Dorito...no...you don't read Star Wars...you watch it, you experience it. You ffffeeeelllll it...come on, we're gunna go pick up some Thai and rent some movies."

"Nobody rents movies anymore Tony, even I know that. And they call me old..." Tony just gave him the face he always gave, an eye roll and a lip jerk. Steve pulled away from him and took the book back. "Tony, you wanna do something nice for me...do some dishes. Or wash my bike. Don't go out and try to complete this list. It's my list..."

"Why haven't you done anything on it?"

"I don't know! I will though."

"When."

"When I'm ready."

"So let's do it!"

"I'm not ready..." He muttered, leading Tony to catch on to something the other man was hinting toward. "I get it. It's scary. Yah. Been there." He tapped the arc reactor in his chest as he inched closer to the other man. "When this happened, I lost it for a moment. Just a moment though. Couldn't be down too long, I was kinda held captive. Kinda. I mean, I could have escaped whenever, I just wasn't ready. I didn't want to run without a plan. So I stuck around, used what I had and built my first suit. Even after my escape...I wasn't ready. The press...Pepper...that other guy...everyone in the world...was about to know something I wasn't ready for them to know."

"I'm sure you have a point..."

"My point issss...this is me. This is my thing, and that...is yours." He tapped the book in the other man's hand, "That's your arc reactor. Just...y'know, without the reusable energy and the cool glow." Steve rolled his eyes as he stuck the book back in his pocket. He didn't want Tony to feel bad. He also didn't want to start out on a new life without first closing up his old one. He was sure that was something only he had on his mind, but he learned within a second, it wasn't. "Is it the old days that gotcha down Pops...is that it?" Steve looked to Tony, unable to hide the expression on his face. The other man bobbed his head a bit and backed away. "Thought so. You're the classic fish out of water...er...Captain out of time? I dunno. Point is...you don't wanna move forward because you weren't done. You weren't done with that old life. Was it a girl? Guy? What..."

"You could say that..."

"So it was a guy..."

"It's not what you think..."

"A girl? Guygirl? Gi'mme somethin' here Rodgers. I'm drowning. Come on."

"It was both..."

"Wowww...wowwow! So you had the hots for a girl...aaand a guy!"

"NO! No...just the girl."

"Well where is she? I'm sure she's still alive. Granted she'll be about 90 or so...lets look'er up!" Steve turned away from him in that moment and began to walk away. "Can't look up someone who's no longer living Stark. No matter how hard we try." He looked back at the man over his shoulder. "Last time I saw her I buried her, alright. So it's not that...not any more. It was...once."

"So what is it now Steve..." Tony asked as he approached slowly. "What? This other guy? The guy you say you didn't have the hots for but for some reason I think you secretly did."

"Why do you do that...?" Steve asked as he turned to him. "Why do you always run your mouth like that? What are you trying to pull?"

"If I'm pulling anything it's working because you've dropped your guard." Tony said with a smirk. He was winning. "You just seem like the kinda guy who would be into other guys..." He put his hands up, "Just saying! Don't shoot. That's just how it looks to me."

"Why does it look that way to you...why do you even care?"

"I just want you happy buddy! It's not the 1940's anymore! Guys can be into other guys, and I don't wanna see you suppressed! I want you to let your freak flag fly! Rainbow or otherwise! Is that so wrong?"

"Yes. Mostly because you think I'm the kinda guy who would be so close minded. But also because you come choked full of ulterior motives Stark, I know you."

"Know me because youuuuu...have a thing for me and you're suppressing it because you can't come to terms with your sexuality and your feelings for me?!"

"Do you want me to have feelings for you...?" It was quiet for a second then Tony let out a high pitched giggle as he pat the other man on the shoulder. "Oooohhhh Cap! You couldn't afford me." It was a nice deflection, but it failed. Though Steve was from another time, where men were men, he was open minded. He knew a guy back before his transformation. Everyone called him Marty but his name was Henry. Steve would sit with the guy on long nights at the bar. While the rest of the gang drank, he and Marty would sit out in the alley way and talk. Mostly Marty would go on and on about a girl he knew in Singapore. But one night, while at the peak of his intoxication he had planted a kiss on Steve that would have shaken any other man. When all was said and done Marty apologized profusely. Steve just laughed it off and told the drunk bastard not to worry. Looking back on it now Steve had to wonder about what that meant for him. A guy like that in a time like that in an era like that? And he didn't get upset? Granted Steve was never really quick to anger but still. It left him questioning things. He had already made up his mind way before Tony came sniffing around the camp. Steve had himself, or at least that...figured out. All he had to do now was sit back and watch Tony fall all over himself to cover his tracks. This was sure to be amusing. Why not stir the pot? After all, Tony did deserve a little rousing...

"Are you suggesting you're for sale Stark?"

"For sale? HAAH! You...you what? You wanna buy all this? You want a ticket to this ride buddy boy? You cant handle me!"

"I never said I wanted to handle you. I just asked if you were for sale..."

"You're messing with me now right? Is that what you're doing? Because what, I messed with you right?! That's clever Rodgers. I like this side of you."

"All I asked was if you were for sale. Why are you avoiding the answer? Its a simple yes or no Stark. What's wrong? Afraid? Afraid of my reaction?" Steve had the upper hand by now because Tony had gone into a stuttering fit that ended with him calling out to Jarvis and walking away. Here he was trying to get Steve to admit to something he himself was afraid of admitting to. Steve had himself a good hard laugh at this then turned and headed back down the ramp to the lower level where he could sit and finish that chapter in his book.

Before he turned the page to get to chapter 7 a loud crash came from the lab. Steve was about ready to call it quits on the whole thing anyway, it was causing him to nod off. Well, this had him up, alert and ready for action. He calmed down a bit when Bruce called from the lower levels, assuring everyone it was just something he had dropped. If Doctor Banner was around then that meant Tony was working with him. And if those two were together it would be not only easier but funnier if he were to be messed with. Steve rolled up the paperback and stuck it in his back pocket before heading down the series of ramps and stairs to get to the lab. He was already coming up with a plan. He punched in the numbers and waited for Jarvis to let him in. He slowly made his way over the threshold, clearly strutting.

Bruce looked up at him from behind his glasses then gave Tony a look. The other man caught on and looked up as well, to spot Steve. "You know the lab is no place for you."

"I know. I mean who in their right mind would want a science experiment in their lab that they can clearly run tests on..."

"is'is'is he messing with you right now because I...I cant tell..." Steve smirked as he crossed his arms, making sure to push his fists into his biceps, casing a bit of flexing...that Tony took note of quickly. "Yeah Bruce, he's messing with me...and its time he got the hell outta my lab. No one is running tests on anyone."

"Why not...I'm in peak physical condition, choked full of stamina...I could go all night long if you wanted...I'm strong...I could even lift you, suit and all...if you wanted...and lets not forget..." He grabbed at the bottom of his shirt and yanked it over his head, flexing his pectorals, "I...am physically-"

"Full of yourself. Yah, you are physically full of yourself." Tony snapped as he made his way around some equipment. He hid behind one of the screens and began to tap away on it, avoiding any eye contact that could be made with the Adonis. "Wwwwhaats...going on?" Bruce asked as he looked between the two of them. Steve chuckled then put his shirt back on. He pat Bruce on the shoulder and smiled. "I'll tell you when you're older son." And with that, he left the lab in a fit of giggles. Round two...went to him.

He was sitting at the table enjoying a victory sandwich a few hours later, when Tony burst into the kitchen in a fit of Hulk like rage. Steve looked up at him, one brow raised. "Stark." He snubbed him a bit, going back to the ham and cheese. Before he could take a bite his sandwich was slapped from his hands and it hit the floor in slow motion it seemed. Steve looked down at it as if he had just lost a loved one to cancer. "I just bitched slapped your fucking sandwich and ooooh my god if you tell me to watch my language this time I'll give you the worst Indian burn EVER!" Steve slowly looked up at the man with both brows raised now. "That was maybe the weirdest thing anyone has ever-"

"Shut up Rodgers!"

"Why the hell are you so mad right now? If anything I should be the one upset. That was a perfect sandwich. Everything was in its place. The mayonnaise spread on it evenly and-"

"Shut up about the sandwich! You know what you did!"

"No, please tell me..."

"Yoouuuuuuu! You came into MY LAB and messed with MY HEAD!"

"How so..."

"YOUKNOWWHATYOUDIDDAMNIT!"

"Tony, has anyone ever told you that you might have anger issues..." With that the said man let out a growl so hard it actually made Steve jump, just a little. From there Tony stormed out of the room, kicking over anything in his way, not to mention, once he saw Natasha, he grabbed her by the shoulders and threw her into the couch before storming into another room. She let out a laugh as she bounced back to her feet. She spotted Steve and joined him at the table. She looked down at the sandwich then back up at him with a look of mock pity. "Ooh, I'm so sorry Steve." She put a hand on his shoulder. "Was she special? Did she suffer?" Steve chuckled and shook his head. "What was all that rage about anyway?" She asked. He smiled bright as he leaned into her, ready to gossip. "Tony Ssstark...has a secret."

"Dish you queeny bitch."

"He has feelings...stirrings...for someone in the compound."

"Is it me? I see the way he looks at my butt. The same way I look at it every time I get out of the shower."

"You only wish Romanoff. I don't think you're his type."

"Blonds? Brunets? Fat, skinny, what!?"

"Male..."

Natasha's cheeks burned a hot molten red as a scream began its way up her body. When it reached maximum capacity the windows shattered. Steve wasn't phased and it made him laugh almost as loud. She finally got it out of her system and grabbed onto him roughly. "STARK?!" Steve nodded. Everything was coming true for this closet fangirl. Not only had Steve confided in her about his own sexuality, but now, he was spreading a rumor that may or may not have been true...and her tween sized brain was in overdrive. "I SHIP YOU GUYS SO HARD I'M SAILING TO EUROPE!" She screeched. Around anyone else this was not the Natasha she let people see. Two, count them, two people knew how she really was. Clint and most recently, Steve. "Can this be canon? PLEASE!" He laughed a bit as she shook him. "Canon? Nat you're confusing me!"

"Oh shut up, Tony is the one confused." Steve laughed hard at that then stood up. "Listen, not a word ok? Keep this to yourself. This is classified information, I'm sure you can handle it." She nodded, knowing full well just how secretive she could be. No one would find this out. She just had one issue...

"So...is this why they didn't work out. Him and Potts? I mean, I know they went on break recently...could this be why?"

"Possibly. But who can really say. Again, not a word Nat...I'm counting on you."

"Aye aye Cap!"

It was time to do some investigating. Something he was honestly good at. When he wanted to know something he would retrieve the information by any means. Be it breaking into a top secret room...or a top secret mind. The trick here was to gain some form of trust. Tony had that with Banner for a few reasons. Steve and Tony didn't have much in common and honestly there were times where he thought the nightlight of a man hated him. First thing was first, get that guy drunk.

Steve himself couldn't but he was pretty good at faking it. He dawned a hoodie and was in the middle of a liquor store trying to pick something special out just for Tony. He was offered help but the lady who worked there smelled like cigarettes and barbeque for some reason so Steve sent her away politely. He found the perfect bottle, drying up every ounce of his folding money. This had better be worth it...because his next paycheck was two weeks away.

He made his way up the stairs, big brown paper bag in hand, fighting his keys for attention. The bag won and his keys hit the ground and bounced. He sighed and bent down at the best moment. The door opened and there the target stood, getting the perfect view of the most perfect full moon. "RODGERS YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING!" He stood so fast the bottle slipped and plummeted. He stopped it with his foot, catching it on the tiptoe. He looked up at Tony and let out a giggle. "Honest, that was an accident." He twitched his foot, sending the bottle into the air, then catching it and holding it out. "Peace?" He said sheepishly. Tony eyed the bottle then looked back at the other man. "Where did you get the money for that..."

"Your wallet..."

"I hope that was a joke..." He moved aside and let the man enter before shutting the door. "Seriously, that's not cheap and you get paid about as good as a Mini Mart sacker." Steve eyed him over his shoulder as he set the bottle down on the coffee table. "That's a little harsh Stark, come on...drop the wall." He held up two fingers in another attempt at peace. "Honest...come on..." He wiggled his hand around playfully, making the peace sign dance. Tony let out a short sigh and dropped his shoulders a bit in a more calm manor. "Fine, whatever, peace. You do know I have a stocked bar right..." Steve turned as Tony pointed to the little section. Every ounce of energy drained from him as he leaned backwards with a groan. Tony began to pat himself down as if he were searching for something. When he failed to find it he began to turn this way and that. "You did take my wallet didn't you?! You hairy little thief!" Steve looked to him as he crossed his arms. "Stark you don't have a wallet, you have a checkbook. Second...Hairy? Do I need to take my shirt off again?"

"Don'tyoudare!" Tony snapped as he pointed at him. "Don't...you dare. Youuuuu just keep your clothes on mister..." He wagged the finger then picked up where he left off and looked around the room. "Why do you need your money right now anyway?"

"Gunna pay you back for the bottle of..." He looked to the table and tilted his head. "Jim Bean? When have you ever seen me drink Jim Bean...?"

"Its the thought that counts right? I have actually never seen you drink it and thought maybe you would like the change." Tony listened to him with a look on his face that screamed insecurity. "You trying to get me drunk Rodgers..." Steve had to chuckle. He grabbed up the bottle and unwrapped the top. "Me? Trying to get you drunk? No sir." He unscrewed the top and put the bottle to his lips. "Trying to get me drunk." Tony watched with wide eyes as Captain Squeaky Clean downed half the bottle without even making a face...

When he thought he had gained a bit of trust he handed the bottle over as he wiped his mouth. Tony took it from him gently, his eyes full of suspicion. "What the hell did I just whiteness?"

"Uuuhhh...what? I just took a sip!" Tony's brow rose a bit as he looked at the half empty big bottle. A sip...right. He looked to Steve again as he brought the bottle to his own lips now. Steve smiled warmly and held out his hands, gesturing for Tony to go ahead and let loose. Tony wasn't one to drink from the bottle but there was something shaming about this. Damning almost. If Steve fucking Rodgers could drink it from the head then he had to now. He tipped the bottle and took a swig then jerked it from his mouth and shivered as he made a face. Steve smirked. "Look at that, you're a big boy now..." Tony shot him a look before once more going into a fit due to aftershock.

Before long the bottle was almost empty and Steve was mirroring Tony's drunken body language and speech. This was his only way of gaining trust. He and Bruce shared numbers and science, but not drinks. Tony leaned in as he grabbed up the bottle. He slumped back onto the couch and eyed Steve, who was smiling like an idiot. "Y'no'h...sometimes...I wanna punch you in your perfect teeth." Steve sat up as best he could without breaking character. "You think my teeth are perfect? How...nnnnice of you to notice. I think...listen to me," He grabbed Tony by the face and forced him to look his way, "Listen to me, I think...your ears are perfect...so we're even."

"I have little ears."

"I like them! I dooo! Awww Tony come on, they're cute."

Tony pointed a usable finger at the man without letting go of the bottle. "Youuu're cute...ppppsssshhhhhhhhhhhh! I din'say that, ok. I think Nat has a thing for me, and it would...cccccrrrush her...very...soul...so...so just...between you and me..." He put the bottle to his lips, "I don'like...girls." He took a swig and coughed a bit as he slammed the bottle down. Mission accomplished...so far. All he had to do was get a little more information then put the poor bastard to bed. "Is this whiskey?!" He giggled out as he took the bottle in for inspection. "It makes me a little loose..."

"It is..." Tony furrowed his brow a bit, "Loose how, you mean in the bowels? Roy'dersss...buddy...TMI..."

"Nooo...not that kinda loose." He looked to Tony slowly, pretending to see him through drunk eyes. Tony sat up a bit, with a wiggle. "Youuu mean...to tell me...you don't get wh'ey...whiskey shits?"

"That...is what I am telling you. I dooo not, get whiskey shits. No..." Tony sat up more and leaned in, a bit too close. "Mmmrrh...so...eeehm...its more of a...sexual looseness...you are in fact telling me you are sexually open...aahheerrmmm...right now...that's what you're telling me..." Steve looked to him and the two were face to face, so much so that Steve could feel Tony's hot breath on his lips. He was either starting to believe that or...in this moment...he was beginning to feel...a little loose. "Too far." He said swiftly as he stood up, causing Tony to go forward.

Steve caught him and hoisted him up over his shoulder. Tony propped his elbow up on the other man's butt and held his own head up using this method. He tried his best to look back at Steve. "Wha's too far? Me too far, I'm too far? Thought you were loose!" He let out a drunken laugh before Steve started toward his room. Tony watched the floor move under him...then started to focus on the fact that his stomach was pressing into the other man's shoulder. "Steve...eerhm...if you're taking me to bed I need...to make a pit stop...trust me, warm whiskey vomit is not romantic...Steve..." The world shifted and he latched onto the other man's perfect little bottom. Steve stopped and set him on his feet, which did not make things any better, only worse, which his boots soon found out. He sighed and looked down. "Tony, I'm so sorry. This was-" Tony stood upright, cutting him off with a finger to his lips...and cheek...and eye. "Ssshhhppphhhh...Shh. Its ok, I can have those cleaned...and youuuuu...can take me to bed...now, ri'now. Because..." He began to whisper, "I...am in...ttthe mooody mood mood...mood..." Steve was about to confess to everything but found himself catching the poor man before he went down.

The next morning was neither fun nor successful for either men. Tony finally began to stir around just before noon. He entered the kitchen in nothing more than some old Ninja Turtle sleep pants. Steve was at the table with a new and improved sandwich. He looked up and choked on the bite he had in his mouth. He swallowed hard and stood, letting his lunch go ignored. "My god...Stark, what-"

"Coffee."

"Coffee. Sure thing..." Steve rushed to the counter and began to make a fresh pot. "This is all my fault Tony, I'm sorry. I...I really need to tell you something..."

"Yeah I need to tell you something too..." Steve looked to him in such a hopeful way. It went unnoticed. "Shut the hell up." Tony finished. Steve nodded and put the grounds in the filter. He had never really seen Tony disheveled...or shirtless. They hadn't gotten that close. He had already taken note of the way the Arc Reactor sat in the other man's chest. How it protruded out just a bit, causing a bit of an indention in the skin around it. He filled up the chamber and turned on the maker. Tony was already sitting at the table, putting his head in his hands. "How...are you not...hung over...?" He asked in such a groggy way. Natasha was passing through the room and took this as a cue to answer. "Oh, Steve can't get drunk." And just like that, she was already in the next room. Steve's entire body stiffened up as he watched Tony slowly look at him. He put his hands up in surrender and opened his mouth, ready to sputter out an apology. He didn't get the chance, because Tony stood and got right in his face.

His eyes were narrow, dark and full of rage. He never spoke, not a word. He just shook his head then turned and left the room, leaving Steve to a fresh pot of coffee and a half eaten sandwich. He sighed hard and turned off the pot. "Good going Rodgers." He muttered to himself as he pulled the pot out and put it to his lips. Only he could handle a full pot of scalding coffee. Even if not for that, he would have still punished himself for his lack of grace in this matter. That trust he thought he had was gone now and he was sure there would never be a window open again. Unfortunately this did not mean he was giving up. This only meant he had much more work piled up. The mission just got a little harder was all.

He finished his sandwich, opting to let things cool down. He even took a little time to shower and put on something that wasn't covered in whiskey stench. This had given the cool down time an hour to take affect. He pulled on a new shirt, one he had actually, officially bought for himself. As he buttoned up the last three he was making his way up to the lab doors. He looked up right as the last button found its place. "Hey big guy...what are you doing? Did he kick you out? Did you break something? What are you doing just standing here?" He moved to the side so he could punch in the code, but the big green bodyguard blocked him. He looked up again. "Easy Banner. I just wanna talk to'em."

"No."

"Bruce, come on-"

"NO BANNER!"

"You're being a really bad friend!"

"Hulk good friend." He muttered as he sat in front of the door, letting Rodgers know...he wasn't getting in. "Ok, what's it gunna take Jolly Green. Huh? You want some glow'y metal, what's that stuff called? Pladium? Pludium? Plut...plat...whatever..."

"Cant bribe."

"Oh come on! Did he pay you? What is it, I'll double it!" The only thing Hulk did was let out a snort which resulted in snot...which he promptly licked off his upper lip. Steve made a face. "That always works when Tony says it. Hey, look...what if I got you some baseball cards? You like those!"

"Hulk no like b'sball."

"You gotta like something."

"Smashing."

"Of course. Wait hey! You wanna smash me?!"

"...Little..."

"Smash me! Go on, gi'mme your best shot pally! Yah! Just...just rough me up...kick me through a wall, whatever you want! If I let you beat me up, will you let me in?" Hulk's eyes darted back and forth a bit as he used his tongue to dig into one of his nostrils. He gave it some thought then looked to Steve with a big wide grin...

Tony looked up as the door opened. "Thought I told you not to..." His words caught in his throat as he watched a battered and broken Steve enter the lab, hunched over and trying to find a stable crutch to lean on. He stood fast and rushed to the other man's side in a panic. "What the hell? What's going on?! Is there some kinda threat I wasn't called on? Do I need to suit up?!" Steve let out a broken chuckle then allowed the other man to help him into a chair. "Naaah...this? I'm fine! Just playing with Hulk! Nothing out of the ordinary! I Like...how you came to my aid though." Tony jerked away from him suddenly and stepped back. "Better hang that notion up before it starts billing you...I did no such thing." Steve looked up at him with a smirk, knowing damn well what just happened. He also knew Jarvis was prone to recording everything in the lab. He would put this blackmail in his back pocket for now and use it when he needed to. "Ok Stark, maybe I just wanted to think that."

"Why would you want...you know what, you're a sick little monkey and I don't wanna talk to you. In fact, I don't want you in the lab, security breech. Jarvis..."

"Sir...you never made such a rule."

"Bingo. Thanks Jarvis, you're a real pal."

"Don't talk to him like that. Furthermore, get outta my lab before I blast you out." Steve looked to him with a little smile. "Come on Stark...peace. Ok? I just took a beating so I could get in here." Tony jerked his head back a bit, letting it tilt some. "Peace. No, see there is no peace between us anymore. You destroyed that when you lied to me. I trusted you. Not to mention..." He leaned in a bit and began to whisper. "I told you things...things not even Jarvis knows."

"I know everything Sir."

"Mute. Seriously, how could you do that?" Steve put his hands up once more in an attempt at surrender. "I know saying sorry right now would only get me tossed out on my fanny."

"Say ass, like an adult..."

"Tony..." He stopped himself because he had begun to laugh a bit. Tony didn't catch on or he had missed the joke all together. He was even looking around now in confusion, searching for the punch line. He finally gave up and looked to the grinning idiot. "Ok...lets hear it. What's so funny...?"

"Ass."

"Ass?" Steve let out another laugh, so hard he had to grip his side to keep his rib from floating away. "Its the way you say it! There's a weird hint of some kinda accent or something, and I just picked up on it, and for some reason, it gave me the giggles...I'mmm sorry Tony, I am...I know there's nothing funny about this...I just...I...heh! Say it...one more time!" Tony was staring at this man like he just grew a second head. He put his hands up now. "Who are you and where is Steve." He grabbed the man's bruising face and looked him over. "Loki? Is that you? Just blink twice. If its you, I'll send ya back out there to the beastie!" Steve was laughing through the pain as Tony jerked his head around, back and forth. To him, this was actually kind of pleasing. It was cute...and so unlike Tony.

He finally let him go and crossed his arms, blocking the band name on his shirt. "Seriously Steve, what the hell is wrong with you..." The other man looked up at him and again let off a smile. "I know what I did was wrong." He scooted to the edge of the chair and dug his book out of his pocket. He held it up and flipped a few pages. "Got a pen?" Tony grumbled, but gave in and offered the pencil behind his ear. Steve began to scribble on the page, crossing out the word Nirvana. "There. I crossed something off my list." He looked up. "What's next? Rocky? Is it some kinda candy?"

"He's a boxer."

"Oh, got it...well, hey, I like boxing! This is perfect! What do we do? Do we fight him or..."

"He's not...a real boxer Steve, its a movie, well...a few movies."

"So lets watch'em! We can rent them...along side Star Wars, if you want."

"I do not want. Steve what are you doing?! Seriously!"

"Stark...I'm finishing my list."

"Well good for you. Get the hell outta my lab and go do whatever it is old as fuck guys do with second chances."

"Oh, that's on the list buddy..." Tony was brought back down off his horse that was ever so high. He watched Steve turn a few pages then took the book when it was handed to him. He looked at the page then lowered it. "Get a tattoo?"

"Under that." He corrected. Tony looked back at the page then lowered it. "Go on a date?"

"Bingo."

"Well you let me know how that turns out old timer." He said as he tossed the book back at him. Steve just chuckled at the fact that Tony was missing the point. "Alright. I can knock a few of these out all at once. Lets see. Thai food...then movies. Rocky and Star Wars...all with my date."

"Mh. Good luck. Door's that way."

"Just waiting on you." Tony slowly turned back to Steve with that look again, like Steve was just sprouting heads left and right. Steve inched to the edge of the seat and sat there in comical anticipation. "Yeeah. You. So...maybe put on something pretty."

"Oh fuck you."

"Language." Steve sat back now and put his arms behind his head casually. "No, seriously...you're wearing that?"

"What's wrong with what I have on?" Tony barked as he lowered his arms. Steve just wanted to get a look at the band name. AC/DC. "Actually, nothing. Now that I look at it. Yeah you look presentable." He stood up and adjusted his shirt. This caused one of the top buttons to come undone...and fall off. He let out a sigh and watched it hit the floor. "Judging me on what I have on, have you looked in a mirror?"

"Hey, easy. I did just take a beating." He muttered as he poked at the little thread that once held that button. Tony had to blink a few times so he could clear up his mind. "You...let Banner beat the shit outta you...for what now?"

"To get in here."

"All so you could ask me out on a date..."

"Eehhh...no. That's just how it turned out. Honestly I had no idea what I was gunna say or do. I just wanted to get to you so we could talk." He looked up at the other man with a smile on his now chubby cheeks. "If you want, I can leave, honest this time. No argument. I'll skedaddle."

"Skedaddle?"

"Too old fashioned? Vamoose? Is that better?"

"Why are you worried about it anyway?"

"I dunno. Guess I just...wanna fit in. I was never really good at it." Tony pointed a finger at him as he watched him stand. "You're trying to appeal to my humanity. Joke's on you I ain't got any!" Steve chuckled and slapped his judging finger away. "I'm just trying to carry on with my life Stark, can you say the same..." The sting from that question got Tony right in the bone, and Steve could see it all over his face. "I'm sorry."

"No...no you have every right I guess. I've become a shut in. I just...Every time I turn around there's more work or there's more missions. I have this plate...see...and its full right...then along comes the waitress, who, by the way, is not at all attractive..." Steve chuckled and crossed his arms. Tony continued, "And she's got this cart with her right...and she's just wheeling it up to my table in this ominous way, the wheels squeaking and everything...and its just me here. No one else. So instead of this witch putting food on someone else's plate, no she puts it on mine." Steve had become enchanted almost as he listened to Tony suddenly explain something so deep to him. He had even lowered his arms and moved in a bit. "I had no idea." He said softly as he put a hand on the other man's shoulder. "Honestly Stark, I really didn't know. I'll get out of your way. If I could, I would help but...lets be honest, numbers scare me." He smiled, hoping Tony would at least pick up on the humor. Tony, as well, gave a little smile. Success. "But...if there is anything I can do. Lift something heavy...get you a drink, whatever...I would." Tony looked up with his eyes to make some contact with him. "Scouts Honor." Steve joked. "You name it; I'll have your back."

That, alone almost had Tony misty eyed. It seems easy from the outside. Tony always looked as though he had it all together. Clearly he was misleading everyone. Well now Steve knew the truth. And he planned to run with it. If there was one thing he had going for him, it was his honor. The two men were face to face at this point, both exposed in one way or another. All system seemed to be a go for Steve so he stepped closer and put a hand on Tony's shoulder. "Listen Stark..." He held up his book of lists. "This? Is yours...I don't need it anymore." Tony took the book slowly and looked it over in confusion. When he looked up he spoke. "Why? I mean, how else are you gunna keep track of things you gotta catch up on?!" Steve smiled, noting that Tony had fallen right into the trap. "That's where you come in pal. You are my list." Loyal, foolhardy and maybe a little Stupid, that was Steve Rodgers. You could call him many things, but a coward had better not come up. Once he was done making sure Tony had a place in his book he made sure Tony had a place in his life, sealing the deal in that moment with a kiss. Taking note...Stark's lips were much better than Marty's.

Spoo: THE END BITCHES!

Tony: Not bad for a beginner.

Spoo: NAUGHTY CHAIR! *Cracks whip*