"Olivia!"
She couldn't stop the sigh from escaping her lips. The day had been going as smoothly as a day can when surrounded by sexual deviants and predatory scumbags. She had managed to draw out a confession from a rapist she had been chasing for weeks and Munch had even caved on her one daily wish, walking the brisk route to her favourite coffee shop and grabbing her favourite latte instead of trying to get her to compromise her intestinal heath and accept a cup of his own brew.
But of course, like everything in Olivia Benson's life, nothing stayed peaceful for long.
"Olivia!"
She pursed her lips before looking at the source of yelling that had infiltrated her peaceful station.
"Brian. What's with all the yelling?"
"Olivia," he huffed out, quickly making his way over to her. "Hi, babe."
"Brian," she whispered harshly, darting her eyes around the room. "I told you not to call me that here."
He squinted his eyes at her and shook his head disbelievingly.
"Oh come on, Olivia. Are we still pulling that crap? Half the station already knows we're dating."
"I know that, but there are some people-"
"There's one person."
"Yes, there's one person who doesn't and I need to tell him on my own terms," she answered, crossing her arms across her chest and glaring at him for interrupting her.
"Remind me again why it's taken you this long to tell him? I mean, we're going shopping for furniture this weekend, Olivia. Shouldn't you at least mention that you're moving?"
"Why would I do that?"
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe so he doesn't come across some old lady slowly making her way out of your old apartment to go grocery shopping instead of seeing you?"
Fuck. She had completely forgotten about that. It's not like he was picking her up everyday, but Brian did have a point. For once.
"Look Bri," she said softly, resting her hand on his forearm. "I'll tell him. I promise, okay?"
He looked down at her hand on his arm, and covered it with his own, brushing his thumb over top of it back and forth.
"I know it's hard for you, Olivia. You're not a woman who gets into relationships very easily. But you're moving in with me. And I eventually want you to be my wife, the mother to my children," he admitted, looking up at her. "And I need you to be completely okay with this commitment, alright?"
She softened her look at his words and leaned in to give him a quick kiss.
"I know, Bri. I want all of that too. You just have to let me do some things at my own pace."
He nodded and stood up, refusing to let go of her hand.
"Besides," she joked. "We're not all as headstrong and stubborn as you."
He let out a small laugh, and turned his head when he heard a commotion out in the hallway followed by angry yells.
"That could only mean one thing," he said, looking at her and reluctantly dropping her hand. "Your boyfriend is back."
"Brian-"
He shook his head and turned around, walking toward the exit.
She watched him leave, her stomach churning at the mess she was in. She knew she owed it to Brian to confess and come clean, after all, like Brian said, it's not like the entire precinct didn't know about it anyways.
"I'm going to kill Lanagan and then I'm going to kill Kathy. No, that's a terrible idea. I'm obviously going to need a lawyer if I kill Kathy. I'll kill Kathy, let Lanagan get me off, and then I'll kill him. Do you think Novak would prosecute me?"
Olivia watched as her longtime partner Elliot Stabler walked into the precinct, tossing different articles of clothing along as he went. A jacket here, a tie there.
"Meeting didn't go well," she offered, watching as he sat down in front of her, his face still red with anger.
"You could say that," he scoffed.
"What did Lanagan say?"
"The same shit he always says. The best I can hope for is joint custody, but Kathy has a pretty decent case for sole. Dicky's still not talking to me. And Kathy is just a total bitch," he roared, attracting some stares from various officers moving in and out of the precinct.
"I'm sorry El," she offered solemnly. She never knew what to say in these situations.
He looked at her and offered a grateful smile.
"Thanks Liv. You want to go and get a drink after work?"
"I don't know-"
"Ah, come on, Liv. You're my best friend and I'm going through a divorce. You're supposed to buy me drinks. I bought you drinks after you broke up with the sleezeball newspaper editor, did I not," he begged, putting on his best puppy dog eyes.
She looked at him, her stomach flip-flopping. Fuck, fuck, fuck, she thought as she fiddled with a pen on her desk.
"Fine. But no more than two drinks," she answered, risking another glance at his face.
He couldn't stop the shit-eating grin from covering his entire face before rolling his chair out from behind his desk and over beside her.
"You really are the best friend a guy could ask for, Liv," he announced, bumping his shoulder to hers.
"Just don't forget that when I eventually will need you to buy me drinks," she joked, her arm on fire from where he touched her.
Fuck.
He laughed and nodded his head, swinging his chair back over to his desk and opening up a file.
'You've really dug yourself a new grave this time, Olivia.'
She looked up at him again, watching as his lip turned down as he read the details on their newest case.
A vibration on her desk distracted her from her obvious staring and she glanced down to read the new message.
"Found a pretty cheap grill over at a hardware store on 44th. Think of all the burgers and hot dogs we can make this summer, Olivia. Love you."
As if on cue, the wave of guilt induced nausea came over her, and she fell back in her chair, her head lolling to the side.
"Liv?"
She looked up at Elliot, who was half standing and looking at her with concerned eyes.
"I'm fine, El," she said, smiling weakly.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive."
He nodded his head before sitting down. "You know, Liv, we don't have to go out tonight if you're not feeling up to it."
"No, no. I want to."
"Are you sure?"
"Ask me one more time if I'm sure, Elliot," she barked.
He raised his hands in surrender and looked back at the file he was working through.
"Geez, alright. Don't get all catty on me, Olivia. I already have enough angry women in my life."
She sighed. There was no reason she should be taking out her own guilty frustrations on him. It wasn't his fault that she was having a one sided emotional affair on Brian.
"Sorry, El. I didn't mean to act so rude."
He looked up at her and smiled. "I'm joking, Liv. I just want to make sure you're alright."
"More than," she smiled.
"Good."
"Oh, and Elliot?"
"Yeah?"
"There's something I need to tell you when we go out tonight."
"Everything okay," he asked, crossing his arms on his desk and focusing entirely on her.
"Yes," she nodded. "Just something I wanted to let you know."
He nodded and looked back down at the file, leaning back in his chair.
The rest of the afternoon moved agonizingly slow. They couldn't find one decent lead on their new case and they were buried in phone calls and paperwork.
Worst of all, the lack of action gave Olivia an abundance of time to think about what she was going to tell Elliot tonight.
She didn't know why she was so nervous. Elliot had never been a boyfriend, would never be a boyfriend, and he certainly hadn't given any sign that he would like something to develop between them.
Sure, he got insanely jealous whenever she brought up a new guy, but Munch and Fin always tried to scare her partner away too. She had always assumed Elliot thought of her like a sister and he was just going his older brother job of scaring off any guy she showed any interest in.
Not to mention the Kathy conundrum. They were on and off more than a pair of faucet taps. She was pretty sure Elliot was still in love with Kathy, despite the divorce, and if she had beckoned him over even for just one night, they would fall into their routine all over again.
No, the thing she had with Brian was good. Brian wanted to marry her. Brian wanted to have children with her. Most importantly, Brian was a good guy without any kind of baggage from a first marriage. Brian was good for her, and she would just have to remind herself of that when she was sitting in the bar, across from Elliot, drinking and watching as he-
"Liv?"
His voice roused her from her thoughts. She shook her head and looked up at him.
"Yes?"
"Want to go? It's 6:00," he said, pointing to the clock on the wall.
She noticed he was already wearing his jacket and cursed herself for zoning out so deep.
"Yeah, sorry El. Don't know where my mind's at these days."
"I get it. You should see what I've got running through my mind all day."
"Divorce is hard on anyone, El. But I know this has been incredibly difficult on you," she said.
He squinted his eyes at her. "What are you-Oh, yeah. Yeah. The divorce. It's been pretty difficult," he admitted, turning away so Olivia couldn't see his flustered face.
She went to question it, but decided the first step to disassociating any romantic feelings she could possibly have for Elliot would be to stop inquiring about every little thing.
"Good," he asked her, motioning his head toward the exit.
She nodded and followed him out, letting out a deep breath she wasn't even aware she was holding.
It was time to tell the love of her life that she would be moving in and starting her own life with Brian Cassidy, his least favourite person and adopted younger brother.
What could go wrong?