The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead
There was once a church group that went on a retreat to the mountains.
"We won't rent a cabin this time because we want to be out among God's glorious nature," the pastor told the youth group. And so they drove up to the mountains in the youth van and then set up camp. Eventually they started a fire, brought out an acoustic guitar, and those large cue cards they write the lyrics songs on.
And so they sang. Perhaps it was the lulling voices. Perhaps it was the warmth from the flames. Possibly it was the smell of marshmallows roasting over the Bunsen burner. Whatever it was, the Care Bears came with murder on their minds. They crept around, forming a circle around the church group sitting on logs. The youth sang on, oblivious to the sounds of evil in the bushes over their own noise.
Seemly without warning, demonic teddy bears attacked the unsuspecting youth. They bit the young campers with their fuzzy mouths. However evil the satanic bears were, they still managed to creep away in small numbers. A young boy ran yelling and screaming into a small family's campground and screeched at them to call the hospital or at least the forest rangers.
Both came up, although in small numbers. The medics came first, in response to the severely wounded. The rangers came by to watch the show, but then were conned into checking out the sight of the attack.
They quietly walked back into the now-empty camp site. One had brought a flashlight and was shining it into the bushes, only to find carnage.
A flash of an unnatural mauve made him double-take. There the Care Bears lay, gently sleeping in a semi-circle beneath the laurel. The ranger hesitantly raised his gun to shoot the evil stuffed animals.
"Bang, Bang," the shots rang out with joyful accuracy. The camper-attacking bears had been killed by the lone, but more watchful, ranger. They never knew what hit them.
The rangers picked up the dead bears. But is said that sometimes late at night, you can still see a silhouette of a purple teddy running through the forest. Occasionally people still find bits of synthetic fur, covered in synthetic blood.