Title: Too Late for Love
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You say you wanna see the city lights
Cause they shine so bright and they're calling you
I've known you for what seems like a long time, ever since I had met you at a restaurant while you were stopping in town for a show:
Beth stood outside the ladies' room, waiting for the room to be unoccupied. She could feel her hot tears begin to burn in the corner of her eyes. She wiped them away furiously, she tried to find a Kleenex from her bag, except she fumbled, her bag falling to the ground, the contents of the bag spreading throughout the floor.
She bent down to pick up her bag off the floor, only to collide heads with another.
"I'm sorry." She got up just as the other person did.
"No problem, I couldn't help but to notice that you were crying, if it's okay to ask, do you want to talk about it?" The man asked, giving back to her the bag.
She turned slightly away so he no longer would see her tears. "Why? You don't even know me."
"I'm Jeff." He stuck out his hand.
She gazed at him warily, before returning his gesture. "I'm Beth."
"See? We know each other now." Jeff grinned cheekily.
She laughed, her laughter slowing when Jeff wiped her tears away with the base of his thumb.
"So do you want to get something to eat?"
"We're already at a restaurant." Beth told him with amusement.
"That's why I asked."
I don't even remember why I had been near tears about, because all I could remember was every detail after I had met Jeff.
Even from the night I had met him, I could tell that he lived for his job, he had worked hard to get everything he had.
I also knew that I could never come first when compared to his profession.
Before you go you need to know
I won't stand in your way but I want you to stay
Beth paced back and forth in her house, waiting for Jeff to come home. She was wearing a wine colored low neckline dress that reached to the floor, the necklace Jeff had given her on her neck. Tonight was their 1 year anniversary, and she had prepared a candle light dinner for the both of them, all that was left now was for him to show.
She picked up her cordless phone from the table, turning the phone to speak. "Hello?"
She could hear the faint crackling of a bad connection, a light breathing from the other end of the line. "Beth, baby…"
Her eyes lit up, it was Jeff. "Hey Jeff when are you going to come by?" She didn't mention the dinner because she had wanted it to be a surprise.
"Listen Beth I called you to talk about that.." There was another woman's voice in the background, it was too soft for her to make out the words.
"What about it Jeff?" She asked, oblivious to the point Jeff had been trying to explain.
"I'm really sorry baby, but I can't make it. Vince needed a last-minute replacement for Paul and when he asked me to take over, I couldn't say no."
Her face crumpled, trying her best to be understanding as she always was. "That's okay Jeff…I understand."
She could hear the relief in his voice even from a thousand miles away. "I knew you'd understand. You're the best Beth, I'll make it up to you."
"Yeah, make it up to me." Her voice echoed, her emotions void.
"Hold on a sec Beth." He covered the mouth of his cellphone, in a muffled voice talked to someone she didn't recognize the voice of. "Sorry, my match is next I have to go."
"Jeff, I lov—"
He hung up before she could finish the sentence. Beth sat down on the couch, kicking off her high heeled shoes.
"Another day spent alone…"
I hadn't even minded in the beginning stages of our relationship that he was gone for most of the time, because I understood it was his job, and it was his passion.
Though as the first anniversary passed by, I began to crave for the relationship that I thought I would have when I first started going out with Jeff, the relationship I never got to experience. It hadn't been so awful at the first few months because we had talked, we had connected. Now after the first year, it was as if we've become more friends than in love.
I remember those summer nights
When I held you tight
And it felt so right
I thought what we had would never end
And now you're leavin'
The memories I had with Jeff, maybe the memories were what made me want to stay with him the most.
Jeff chased after Beth, catching her by the waist and pulled her back onto the sand.
She laughed, trying to get out of his grip.
Jeff kissed the tip of her nose, entangling her legs with his.
She leaned back against him, enjoying his closeness. "Isn't the sunset beautiful?"
"Not as beautiful as you."
Beth rolled her eyes, her eyes twinkling with the laughter that she felt, "Oh Jeff you're so sweet."
Jeff laughed, "I knew you'd think so."
She punched Jeff lightly on the shoulder, "You big lug."
Jeff simply smiled, hugging her closer to his body. "I wish we could stay here forever."
"Me too Jeff, you don't know how much…"
Baby think it over
Think it over before you walk away
Baby think it over
Think it over before you turn the page
I want you to stay
I had thought of breaking up with Jeff before, but it always came down to "Did I love him too much to live without him?" In a way, I think I loved him too much, that I couldn't even function without him. Every time negative thoughts would cloud my head, I could hear Jeff's voice echoing in the back of my head, whispering in the southern accent that I had loved, "Baby, think it over."
I really want you to chase your dreams
But the pain it leaves is just so hard on me
I didn't expect him to give up his job for me, because his job was what he strived for, what he lived for. Without it he would probably think he was nothing. It's hard to explain what I feel, all I know is that I felt so alone, all the nights that I woke up in bed, Jeff's side of the bed empty where Jeff should have been.
I guess in a way I wanted him to live his dream, but I wanted him here with me at the same time.
"I miss you." Beth whispered into the phone.
"I do too Beth, I'll be there by Saturday. Think about it that's only 2 more days, I can't wait to see you."
Her hands were shaking so much that she almost dropped her phone. "I can't wait to see you either."
"My match is next, cheer for me?"
"Always." She clicked the phone off.
It was the day Jeff was going to come home, the first time in three months I had seen him.
I had thought long and hard the last couple of days.
Between Jeff's career and me, I knew I'd always end up second, but I'm just not sure I'd be happy with that any longer. Jeff was more important to me then my life, my job, and I would drop everything to be with him..that scares me. I think, what would happen if suddenly he wasn't there anymore? What would happen to me? And the response I come up with is that I would become a shell of my self, if I haven't already become that already.
I've grown so dependent on Jeff, I don't even remember who I was before "Beth – Jeff Hardy's girlfriend"
Everyone says I'm lucky to be dating a star, they don't see what it's like beneath all the glamor and the lights. They have no idea.
Stay till the morning comes
I wanna change your mind
One last chance for you to see
What you're leaving behind
I heard the door unlock, swinging open.
"Beth you here?"
I stood at the entrance of my room in Jeff's house. The closets were empty, the tables bare. One hand I had clutched onto my suitcase, a backpack on my shoulder. It was hard to believe it would very well be the last time I stood in the very same place.
"Beth there you are." Jeff's face lit up, his smile disappearing when he saw her luggage. "What are you doing?"
I almost changed my mind right then, but I swallowed my fears, staring into the eyes that I thought I had loved and would see for the rest of my life, now no longer.
My eyes told him silently You'll always have a special place in my heart. I just learned to move on, or at least I'm trying to. Don't cry for me, because I'm already gone.
I handed him a letter that I had written, not breaking my gaze as I told him, "I'm sorry Jeff, I can't live like this anymore. Goodbye."
Jeff's jaw dropped, he never saw it coming.
I walked towards the door that Jeff had come through only seconds before, hesitatingly holding onto the doorknob, I took one last glance at Jeff before disappearing out the door, closing it quietly behind me.
Jeff's eyes glazed over. He glimpsed at the letter in his hand. He opened it slowly, recognizing Beth's familiar handwriting.
Dear Jeff:
I loved you
"No man is worth your tears and the one who is won't make you cry."
-Beth
Baby think it over think it over
Think it over
Baby think it over think it over
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Please R&R