Foster's Home for Calvin, SpongeBob, and the Baudelaire's
Chapter One
Calvin was in his class with Miss Wormwood, very tired because of her speech. But instantly he shot right up when he heard Miss Wormwood's next bit of news.
"Okay, class," she said, "I have two things to tell you. One is that were going to be reading a series of books called, 'A Series of Unfortunate Events,' by Lemony Snicket, or, more accurately, Daniel Handler," at this, Calvin went back to bored mode, even when she handed out 11 books entiteled, 'The Bad Beginning, The Reptile Room, The Wide Window, The Miserable Mill, The Austere Academy, The Ersatz Elevator, The Vile Village, The Hostile Hospital, The Carnivorous Carnival, The Slippery Slope, and The Grim Grotto.' But Calvin shot right back up when she gave the second bit of news.
"And secondly," Miss Wormwood continued, "Tomorrow were taking a diving trip underwater, and you may bring one family member."
"OOH!" Calvin yelled, "CAN I BRING MY TIGER, HOBBES?"
Miss Wormwood's face simply fell along with two half eyelids and her grin. "Yes," she replied deeply, "You can bring your tiger, Hobbe-"
"YYYAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Calvin interrupted, "I'm going underwa-a-ter, boo-yah, boo-yah!"
"Okay, settle down Calvin," Miss Wormwood said in her glum voice, "Were all going anyway-"
"WHAT!" Calvin screamed, "DON'T YOU REALIZE WHAT HOW THAT'LL EFFECT MY REPUTATION! AUTHORITY IS THE THING REP STANDS BEHIND THIS MONTH ACCORDING TO THE SCHOOL CALVINATOR, AND WITH MY AUTHORITY, AND MY VOLUME RIGHT NOW, YOU SHOULD BE SO STUNNED AND AFRAID THAT YOU'L HAVE TO GIVE-" then Calvin suddenly clasped his hands over his mouth. He had revealed his plan in front of the whole class, and now he ended it with a little oops.
"Nice try, Calvin," Miss Wormwood said, "Were all going," and with that she continued class, and Calvin sat through the rest of it, gazing at the clock.
"I'M HO-OME!" Calvin yelled as he opened the door to his house to he pounced on by Hobbes who was waiting at the front door.
"You're lucky I'm even taking you to my underwater field trip tomorrow," Calvin said.
"Your taking me!" Hobbes suddenly said, "Life is good," and with that, he walked back into the house. Before going back into the house himself, Calvin opened his backback and started reading the back of the eleven books he'd received. They described the contents of the books with things like pasta, an incredibly deadly viper, killer leeches, a dangerous lumbermill machine, glowing paint, parsley soda, a self-sustaining balloon, head surgery, a fortune-teller, snow gnats, and tap dancing, which grabbed Calvin's attention from the front yard, all the way to his room, and by that time he had finished reading all eleven books! Can you imagine? He didn't even notice his mom saying, "I got a bad report from your teacher about authority and reputation-" but she let him go seeing that Calvin was finally reading something. When he got to his room, he had a big smile on his face, just from reading.
"These are the best books in the world!" Calvin cried, "I kind of feel a little sorry for the Quagmires. They have tattered clothes.
"Let me see those," Hobbes said, and in five minutes, he had read them all, and his eyes were filled with tears.
"Your right!" he sobbed, "Those poor Quagmires. My, if I ever get my paws on Count Olaf, I'll rip his eyebrow off!"
"Hey, that'd be cool!" Calvin said, "We could go in the time machine, go into the past and find out what happened.
"But these don't have actual time frames," Hobbes said, calming down a little bit.
"Don't worry about it," Calvin replied, "I've installed a book slot into the time machine so when I put a book into it, it'll allow us to go into the time frames of the books! But best do it after the field trip. Mom will be suspicious of our absence," so Calvin strode off happily, while Hobbes said to himself, "He's smarter too, now," he said.
"Alright, everyone got their diving suits on?" Miss Wormwood called. It was the next day. Calvin's class was on the beach with a teacher, twenty parents, twenty-one kids, and one stuffed tiger, and Miss Wormwood was making sure that everyone had there diving gear on. Calvin was ready, along with the rest of the class. "Everyone's ready?" Miss Wormwood called one last time, "Okay, yes, good, off we go!" Immediately, Calvin darted off into the water with all the giddy of a Series of Unfortunate Events, and was now in the water with Hobbes.
"Any sign of Quagmire, I mean, fish life?" Calvin asked.
"Yes," Hobbes said, and pointed to what looked like a miniature town on the ocean floor. Before Calvin could reply, some sort of lightning suddenly came from the town, shot Calvin and Hobbes, and all at once were dragged down into the town.