I owe everything to Sarah for helping me shine up this work. She gave it time that she didn't have to give, but wanted to. She is an amazing part of this fandom. Without her, this would still be its rusty ol' self. Please, check out her work, it's amazing and she deserves it 3

...

Circumspect and reserved every man should be, and wary in trusting friends.
Of the words that a man says to another he often pays the penalty.

...

It was another perfect morning on Dragon's Edge. At least on the surface. It seemed Snotlout didn't get the memo that it was a 'happy and peaceful' time.

In a large area of grass, surrounded by trees, Snotlout was lying face down, almost hanging over the cliff's edge. Not too far in the distance, Hookfang landed on the flat surface in the center of the clearing. He walked over to his rider. With sudden abruptness, Snotlout pushed himself off the ground. Hookfang reared back in surprise.

"One more time."

Snotlout's voice held the determination that his face did not. And Hookfang knew it wasn't a good time to train if Snotlout's mood was anything to go by. Training distracted could get you killed, and Hookfang could tell that Snotlout wasn't feeling like himself. Hookfang wasn't bonded or anything like that sentimental Night Fury and his shameless human, but one didn't work with someone for years without picking up on their moods. And Hookfang knew for certain that Snotlout was hiding something, some sort of emotion, suppressing his feelings, whatever they might be. And no way in Hel he was going to let his rider put them both in danger just because his thoughts were clouding his judgement.

As Snotlout approached, Hookfang raised his head and wings, keeping Snotlout from mounting up. Of course, Snotlout, being Snotlout, wouldn't just go along like any sensible person.

"Hookfang! You seriously doing this now?" Snotlout's tone had a bite to it, but nothing unfriendly. Still, he sounded tired and distracted. He was clearly in no state of mind to be practicing such a complicated maneuver.

Hookfang moved his head away as Snotlout tried to jump up and grip his saddle. The attempt was fruitless, and Snotlout knew that. Hookfang tilted his head, meeting his rider's eyes and trying very hard to make Snotlout understand.

Snotlout sighed, letting his arms drop to his sides. "I know you're the world's most stubborn dragon, you're my dragon after all, but you can't just stop me from riding. I swear to Odin you will let me mount you and we are going to get this right. Now lower your stupid head!" Hookfang flamed up, stepping back. Snotlout's eyes widened and he took a step forward. "You know we're going to show off what new tricks we learned next week. You want Astrid and Stormfly to beat us?"

Hookfang rolled his eyes, his head tilting with it to emphasize the movement. He lowered his head to let Snotlout mount him, still wary.

They took off into the air, gaining altitude before turning back around to fly next to the edge of the cliff. As they edged closer, Snotlout used Hookfang's horns for stability as he pushed himself to his feet. They were steady. He stepped carefully onto Hookfang's wing, slowly inching to the tip as they approached the edge of their training ground. Arms held outwards for balance he prepared himself to step off. He only had a few seconds to step onto the cliff edge: Hookfang couldn't glide forever, and as soon as he flapped his wings, Snotlout would either be tossed into the air, or, more likely, slip off and plummet. He had to take the step, and he had to take it now. He had to do it! Now! Why couldn't he just do it? It wasn't hard to do it! Even Fishlegs could take a step at the right time-

And he moved the wrong foot, missing the edge and stepping on air.

"Ah, yak piss," Snotlout breathed as he started to fall. It didn't even occur to him that he could die in the short moment he was falling, mind still preoccupied.

Roaring in alarm, Hookfang dived after Snotlout and gripped his rider's belt in his teeth. He flew up to the edge and threw Snotlout onto the grass, careless with his anger, and landed in the shadow of the trees, watching in distress as Snotlout rolled upon being thrown. Snotlout pushed himself too far when he was obviously not thinking straight.

He watched as Snotlout pushed himself to his knees and snapped his head in his direction. "What is going on with you?!" Snotlout yelled as he stood up and started his way over to Hookfang. Before he even took a few steps, Hookfang jumped to another side of their training field. "Don't do this to me. I know you secretly enjoyed watching me fall to my death," Snotlout picked up his pace as he followed after Hookfang, who kept jumping all over the place to avoid him. Hookfang shot a glare at Snotlout.

"Hookfang, this is getting ridiculous! Why won't you let me train?" Snotlout stopped running as Hookfang flew into the air just before he could reach him. The Monstrous Nightmare stayed in the air where there was no way of Snotlout reaching him. He watched his rider turn around to look up at him as he stayed in place.

"We've only just started practicing this move, we're bound to have a few accidents. You can't get angry at me for something that's out of my hands!" Snotlout threw his arms above his head in exasperation. The beats of Hookfang's wings became fiercer with his rising anger at his rider's obliviousness. "What is with you?"

For answer, Hookfang glared at Snotlout. Then he lit himself on fire to show how he felt, and met Snotlout's eyes, trying to communicate his thoughts.

Snotlout hung his head and heaved a sigh. Seeing that Snotlout seemed to have got the message, Hookfang doused the fire that coated his body and fixed his gaze on Snotlout.

"I guess," Snotlout began, "I do have a lot on my mind." He took a deep breath. "And it's all this one stupid muttonhead's fault!" he yelled, throwing his arms in the air. He crossed his legs and sat down, elbows resting on his knees as he leaned his cheek against his closed fist.

Hookfang landed on the ground behind Snotlout, legs tucked close to his body and head resting on the ground. It was his way of saying he was there, and he was listening. Snotlout scooted so his back rested against his dragon, taking on a relaxed position, ready to vent his feelings.

"It's just so stupid. I mean, where did it even come from? I just wanted a cool warrior Viking best friend, but instead I got an incredibly annoying crush on a person who doesn't even exist."

Hookfang raised his head, as if he had just realised who Snotlout was talking about. He looked at Snotlout curiously. "What are you looking at?" Snotlout snapped, feeling exposed and embarrassed to share these thoughts, even if it was with his dragon.

Hookfang rolled his eyes, then curled his body around and rested his head on the lap of his rider. He didn't do it often, but he felt it might get Snotlout to open up just a little bit more. Snotlout tensed up, but soon relaxed and placed his hand on Hookfang's head, stroking it.

He sighed, "He does exist, but it's not him. It's not who I fell in love with. It's just his-his outside. His face? His body? And I miss him. But I know he's never coming back. And now I have to see Fishlegs every day and it reminds me of him and it's just.. it's… so goddamn stupid! Like just give up already. He's not coming back so, just, give up."

Hookfang felt the movement of Snotlout's hand stop. He tilted his head to look at Snotlout's face. He couldn't read it, but he knew there was more to be said. He caught Snotlout's gaze and nodded, encouraged him to continue.

Snotlout smiled the smallest of smiles and continued to pet his dragon's head and neck. "Guess what, Fangster? It's Thor Bonecrusher. That's who I'm hung up over, and it feels so girly but I can't get rid of the feeling. I've tried so hard to get him back. Like when I was training him to face the Quaken, I thought maybe if I pushed him enough Thor would come back. But nothing works. Insulting him, training him. There is just no sign of TB coming back. So do why I get this tingly feeling when Fishlegs is around? It's gotta be because he looks like TB, right? Because what else would it be?"

Hookfang tilted his head again to glare at Snotlout, getting more and more frustrated at Snotlout for his obliviousness. Snotlout scoffed, "What do you know. It's not like you understand." In response, Hookfang smacked Snotlout in the head with one of his horns, to say that yes, he did understand. Snotlout only glared, unusually quiet after getting knocked in the head. He stood up and took a few steps. Shoulders slumped, he said quietly, "I don't know what to do. Ignoring it doesn't work."

He looked in the direction of where he believed Fishlegs' hut was. A new resolve filled his gut. He decided rejection couldn't be any worse than what he was feeling, wallowing in his crush. He turned his head to face Hookfang, a confident smile on his face. "I'm going to deal with this."

He only took a few steps before fear filled his body. "On second thought-"

Fire struck the ground beside his feet, making him jump. He turned to face Hookfang angrily to see he was right behind him. "Fine, fine," he began before mounting Hookfang, "let's get this over with."

...

High up in Fishlegs' room, an investigation was in progress. Bursts of flame in different colours of the spectrum radiated from the Dragon Eye, casting a kaleidoscope of light onto the floor of his hut. Meatlug and Fishlegs were staring in awe at the diagram projected on the wall of his room. "This is a treasure map, girl! Not pirate treasure, I mean it shows that the ancestral ground for Gronckles actually exists and how to find it. Do you know what this means? We can discover things we never even knew about Gronckles, or even more Boulder Class dragons! I couldn't have done this without you, girl." Meatlug tackled Fishlegs in a hug, both sharing the same amount of excitement. He stood up off the ground, dusting himself off and petting Meatlug's head.

"Hey Fishface!"

Fishlegs jumped, startled at the abrupt interruption.

"What'cha doing?"

Fishlegs sighed and turned to face Snotlout, standing in the entry of his hut. "Do you even care?" He asked, fists clenched by his sides.

Snotlout crossed his arms over his chest, looking to the side, a crinkle between his brows. "I wouldn't have asked if I didn't care," he shouted, but Fishlegs noticed it seemed heavy, like he was trying to hide a shake in his voice.
Fishlegs breathed deeply, "Well, Meatlug and I just discovered that there might be more Boulder Class dragons that we have yet to discover. And the location of-"

Snotlout's eyes glazed over before he shook his head and took a step forward, interrupting Fishlegs. "Oh wow, y'know, I just remembered you're boring and I don't care." Snotlout turned and walked off, leaving Fishlegs staring at the place where he used to be.

Fishlegs stood there, frowning, while he rubbed his right upper arm with his left hand. Ever since the incident with Thor Bonecrusher he hasn't felt quite the same around Snotlout, and surprisingly, his words hit Fishlegs harder than they used to. Sensing Fishlegs' distress, Meatlug walked over to him and rubbed affectionately against his leg. It didn't completely lift his spirits, but it still brought a small smile to his face. He petted Meatlug's head and whispered, "Come on, girl, let's get back to the Dragon Eye."

...

"Ahh, I'm such a muttonhead!" Snotlout groaned, smacking himself in the forehead as he walked into his hut. As if the face-slap wasn't enough, he went and butted his head against a wall before deciding that was enough sense-knocking and sat down on his bed. A heavy sigh escaped him as his shoulders slumped. "Why do I keep doing this?" he whispered to himself before reaching into his bedside table drawer to pick up his self drawn portrait of Thor Bonecrusher.

"Why you? I've seen so many brave and ferocious vikings. What makes you so different?" Snotlout gripped at the sheets in self-hatred at his own stupidity. He'd gone up there to understand his feelings. Determine who he had feelings for. He thought having a friendly conversation with Fishlegs would put him at ease, but since when had he been able to talk to Fishlegs without his old obnoxious habits ruining it? It only made him more confused, and the ache in his chest only became stronger. He just wanted to sleep and cry, but that went against everything he was taught growing up. Emotions don't control you, and emotions make you weak. A man doesn't cry. A Jorgenson doesn't cry.

There was a knock on the door. He looked up to find Hiccup standing at his door with Hookfang behind him.

"Hey, Snotlout. Uh, is everything okay? You and Hookfang should be getting ready for nightwatch," Hiccup asked with concern. He petted Hookfang's head as a signal to enter and waited for the Monstrous Nightmare to walk in before he took a few steps in himself. Snotlout looked at Hookfang apologetically. I didn't deal with it.

Snotlout exhaled and looked back down at his drawing. "Thanks, Hiccup. I just, need to figure some things out."

Snotlout looked up when he heard steps heading his way. "Wow. Something really must be wrong for you to thank me like that." Hiccup gently smiled down at Snotlout before sitting down beside him on his bed.

A shaky sigh escaped Snotlout's lips. "My dad would kill me."

Hiccup frowned. "What? Why?"

Snotlout looked down at the floor. "All my life he's been talking about carrying on the Jorgenson bloodline, having an heir. It was just, there was no question about it. Have a wife, have a family. Figures I'd mess that up as well. I mean, I disappointed him with everything else."

"You didn't disappoint him!" Hiccup burst out. Hookfang joined in, rumbling.

Snotlout shook his head, still looking at his boots. "It was just a given. Meet a nice girl, fall in love." He grimaced wryly. "Hey, I did half of that. That counts, huh?"

"Wait a minute." Hiccup blinked, looking hard at Snotlout. "Are you trying to tell me that you, uh, that you're in love with someone?"

"Yeah," Snotlout sighed in self-disgust. "Only it's not someone I could start a family with. And you know what's worse? I wouldn't care if I could spend the rest of my life with him. It's stupid, but he would make it okay." He looked away to avoid Hiccup's eyes, guessing they would hold disgust.

Hiccup's eyes widened in surprise at Snotlout's obvious confession. He looked down at what was in Snotlout's hands. "Is that... Fishlegs?" Hiccup asked. Surprised, he slowly raised his eyes from the drawing to look Snotlout in the face.

Snotlout rubbed his arms hoping it would calm him down, trying to distract himself. "It's actually Thor Bonecrusher. I drew it after Fishlegs broke out of the hypnosis. But now, when I look at it, all I see is Fishlegs," Snotlout replied hesitantly.

"You know," Hiccup started gently, capturing Snotlout's attention before continuing, "Thor is Fishlegs. It's just another part of him that's hidden deep down."

Snotlout whipped his head around to find a smiling Hiccup looking at him. His breath caught in his throat in surprise at Hiccup's kindness. "Just what I don't get is that you don't exactly act nice towards Fishlegs."

Snotlout placed his drawing beside him and massaged his fingers, squeezing and stretching them as he came up with his answer. "I don't know how I feel. But I actually can't help it, it just happens. I think... I think I'm trying to get Fishlegs' attention..."

Hiccup nodded in understanding and stood up. He paced a few steps, back and forth. "Have you actually thought that maybe it isn't Thor you're interested in, but Fishlegs?"

Snotlout averted his eyes. "I've considered it," he whispered.

"See!" Hiccup exclaimed excitedly. "You know deep down that you didn't actually fall in love with Thor Bonecrusher, you were amazed at what Fishlegs could become and fell in love with Fishlegs himself, not his alter-ego. You were impressed."

"B-but I never thought I could actually like Fishlegs. Oh Thor, I've screwed it all up!" Snotlout yelled out as he buried his face in his hands, speaking through his fingers. "I have been hanging around Fishlegs a lot lately, but I thought it was because I wanted to try and get Bonecusher back. I kept screwing it up though. I… I couldn't hide my feelings anymore, Hiccup. But I couldn't let him know. So I called him boring. How stupid can I possibly be? I can't open my mouth without insulting him, and I don't even want to!"
Hiccup sighed. He stopped in front of Snotlout and flicked his forehead to get Snotlout to look up at him. "Yes, you made a few mistakes, but nothing an apology can't fix. Fishlegs is a very forgiving person. Just try to be a bit nicer to him," Hiccup suggested, hands on his hips.

Snotlout nodded. "You're right. Thanks Hiccup, I mean it." Snotlout smiled sincerely at Hiccup before walking towards his dragon. "Come on, Hookfang. Let's go." He and Hookfang flew off. Hiccup watched them go, smiling and standing a bit taller. Toothless butted him in the side and crooned approvingly.