I really enjoy the show and reading the stories that so many have written here on FanFiction. Some of the stories I thought were better than the show itself at times. This is my first attempt at writing a story and about "The Big Bang Theory", so I'm not too sure how this is going to turn out. The storyline is about Penny and Leonard with my twist on it.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything.
Chapter 1: The Assessment
Leonard was fortunate to have the whole apartment to himself for a couple of days. Sheldon was off at a seminar in San Diego for using String Theory with Twistor Revolution. He was thinking now he could have some time to think. At least he didn't have to worry about any schedules, nattering or ongoing roommate agreement issues with Sheldon, just some peace and quiet.
Leonard sat on his couch and was thinking to himself, why do these things always happen to me? "I find a nice girl and then I fall hopelessly in love with her. Then as things are going really great, we fight or break up? Does this happen to other guys?" as he says out loud to himself. "I know Howard never get that far, the girls are already running away from him before the end of the night. Raj might get a one night stand but he couldn't say anything else to them afterwards, even if they did ask him to go out again. With Sheldon, can't even go there."
The one thing that he knew was that it was really different with Penny. His thoughts raced through his head as he tried to rationalize the facts. It wasn't like this with any of the other girls that he went out with. This was different, he usually rebounded pretty quickly after a fight or break up, but it was a lot harder for him this time. What Leonard felt for Penny ran much deeper, as he reflected to himself. It's was very different…. but he couldn't explain it. It's almost as if she was part of him. He was thinking that she was part of his soul.
"God, my heart hurts whenever we argue and I feel so bad afterwards."
Then he thought to himself, whenever he had an argument with Priya, he never felt as bad as he did now. Maybe it's what he thought all along. This is the girl for me, my soul mate my partner for life! Leonard had this sudden scary feeling come over him that he didn't anticipate. What if he'd screw things up with Penny completely and lose her forever? This is the person that he was supposed to be with for the rest of his life. "Oh God! Oh my God!" Panic stricken, Leonard puts his hands on his chest and start breathing heavier. "O.K. calm down…. Breathe slowly…. Breathe slowly" He pulls out his puffer and takes a deep breath. He holds it for a couple of seconds and then he slowly exhales. He then slowly repeats to himself "Breathe slowly". He repeats this over and over until he finally settles down.
After sitting on the couch for some time and pondering, he decided he had to do something. As he thought to himself again, I can't lose Penny just like that, but after the last couple of arguments, how can I? Damn it! I shouldn't have said will you marry me. She was still mad at me for saying I Love You and the worst part was she was mad at me for talking to Sheldon about it. What do I do? as Leonard shakes his head. He felt so lost.
Why did it have to hurt so much as he pondered over the argument again and again in his head? Leonard decided that he was just too tired to do anything about it and decided sleep was probably his best solution for now. He got up from the couch and headed to bed. He hoped that he wouldn't be up in the middle of the night thinking about it. Not likely…..
Awake and exhausted the next morning, Leonard finally rolled out bed. It was eleven in the morning. He was kind of surprised that he had gotten as much sleep as he did. He tossed and turned all night long thinking of what he could've done differently. He tried to think of how to fix this mess that he gotten himself into. He tried to make sense of it all but just couldn't come up with any rational idea. Leonard decided to make some breakfast first and then try it on the white board. He decided that working on the board might help him see things differently this time. He usually can visualize the problem from a different perspective and usually gets pretty good results.
When Leonard finished his breakfast, he grabbed his white board from the living room and decided to work on it in his bedroom. He didn't want anyone to see what he was doing. This was a personal matter. He definitely didn't want Penny to see what he was doing. It would kill him if she saw it. The other person that he really didn't want to see it was Sheldon. He would have never heard the end of it from him if he knew what it was all about. Not only that, but he probably would have said something about it in front of Penny and the gang. No way could he handle that kind of embarrassment.
With the board made up into two columns, Pros and Cons, he started to list the points in each column. After deliberating the facts over the next hour or so, he had more pros than cons. The two big cons were that Penny didn't reply back when I said I love you and will you marry me? Leonard was thinking about the time at City Hall when Bernadette and Howard tried to get married. Penny was so annoyed that I told Sheldon about it. "Maybe…. It's not supposed to be", as he said out loud to himself. As much as I love Penny, maybe we're not supposed to be a couple. Look at all the guys that Penny had gone out with previously. They were all jocks, tall with looks and money, or at least some of them had money. Penny even mentioned that I wasn't her typical guy that she normally goes out with. I mean when you think about it, Penny even said "I love you" to the other guys particularly with Kurt and Mike. Yet she couldn't say it to me? Maybe she's holding off for someone else to come along that's better?
I really need time away to think things over. The longer that I'm in this environment and living under these circumstances, I'll never find out if Penny and I are really meant for each other. Maybe that's what I need to do? Hold on there, am I crazy? I was just freaking out the other day that I might lose Penny. Now I'm looking a possibly moving away, maybe even for good. Is this what I really want? I want to continue seeing Penny, but then on the other hand maybe we should break up? I want what's best for her but at the same time what's best for me too. "Argh, why does it have to be so tough? I just want us both to be happy". Leonard made his final decision, "I guess if this means going our separate ways then so be it".
Leonard walked out from his bedroom and over to his desk to his laptop. He hopped on the University's website and see if there any job opportunity elsewhere. He did some searching through the University links and found a temporary assignment at a University in New York City. It was for nine months and they needed someone to setup a new laser and some experimental equipment right away. "What perfect timing this is?" This would give me the time and space that I need to really think things over. I would also be able to stay on campus and not worry about having to rent an apartment. No travel time and no other additional expense. "It's perfect!"
Leonard started preparing for his trip and setup everything through the University in just one day. Leonard was in between projects so he had already gotten the approval from President Siebert. "Well looks like I'm ready to go". He was actually really fortunate that President Siebert allowed him to go. Nine months is a long time for any faculty member to be away from the University. One of the main reasons that President Siebert allowed Leonard to go, was it gave the University the notoriety to have a Laser expert on staff. The second reason was that Leonard was the only one who could implement such a large complex project and having it up and running on the first shot. The only unfortunate thing that he had to figure out was how to let Sheldon know without him going off the edge with the roommate agreement. He also had to find a way for Sheldon to cope on his own for the most part?