~Song Fic with Reno and Rude and their Daughter. It's an Mpreg. Don't like, don't read, simple.~
Final Moments
What hurts the most I can take the rain on the roof of this empty houseThat don't bother me,
I can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em out.
I'm not, afraid to cry, every once, in a while
Even though, going' on, with you gone, still upsets me.
There are days, every now, and again,
I pretend I'm okay, but that's not what gets me!
What hurts the most, was being so close, and having so much to say,
And watching you fall away,
Never knowing, what could have been, and never seeing the two of you,
Is what I'm trying to lose.
I knew something was wrong, I knew something had happened, even before the phone rang. It was dark in the vacant house as I stood by the clock, waiting to hear something, anything from either my father, Rude, or my other father, scientifically my mother, Reno. But they usually called me cell, and it was never past eleven when they called. My whole body seemed to have disappeared, and it felt as if a black hole had sucked it all up. I felt empty, for I knew someone had been hurt, very badly, and they weren't coming home.
That was their job, though. My parents were always out, risking their lives for the president, and this stupid planet. But they loved their job, Turks, that's what they were called, and they knew how to take care of themselves, so maybe they just got caught up, and couldn't call. I nodded to myself. That had to be it. Unfortunately, that was only part of me that only hopped that. I still felt empty, and terror also held close to my heart like an icy cage.
The phone rang on the side table, close to me. I stared at it at first, terrified and too numb to really answer. But once it rang a third time, I slowly reached out to pick it up, this proving that something was wrong. The only time I was called from the house phone was when Tseng was calling to tell me that I'd have o sleep alone that night, and that Reno and Rude would return the next day. Now I wish that was the case. But it was far from it.
"Hello?" I asked, my voice monotone.
"Alex?" I was slightly surprised to hear Rufus on the phone. He never called the house before, but always seemed to have Tseng call the house. I guessed, since I was sixteen then, that he didn't mind speaking to me. But something in his voice, which sounded heavy, and horrifyingly, gentle, told me that he wanted to talk to me because it was too upsetting for Tseng to. My blood turned to ice, and I began to quiver. "I, I am so… could you do something for me?"
"Yes?"
"Could you gather your belongings? Elena and Violet will come pick-"
I had meant to ask why, but it came out as "Who?"
I heard him sigh solemnly on the opposite line. "Both of them." My heart dropped for what seemed three hundred stories, and it seemed like it took him several hundred years before he explained. "As of eleven o'clock last night, your mother, Reno, became a widow… and in a few minutes, you'll become an orphan."
"I'll be right over," I said, voice still monotone. I didn't even hang up; just let the phone drop as I ran to the front door, keys in my pocket. My feet were bare as I ran across the rough asphalt to the silver car that I had received from… that I had gotten for my recent birthday. The door of the house swung shut as I opened the car door, keys in hand, and slammed them into the ignition. Tears were beginning to sting my eyes, but I bit my lip to keep them from falling. If my mother, there was no way I could say his name with out balling my eyes out, was alive, I had to get to him as soon as I could, and crying could slow me down.
Stand in the rainShe never slows down,
She doesn't know why,
But when she's all alone,
Feels like it's all, coming down
She won't turn around,
The shadows are long
And she fears, if she cries that first tear,
The tears will not stop
Raining down.
The streets were empty; no one was awake at that hour. But I… I can't really say that the girl who suddenly lost her self was I, but it was… But she was wide awake, no feeling but determination in her as she had her deep brown eyes trained on the main building not far ahead. The only sound came from the rain that had begun not long before she left the house. Small water droplets, getting heavier with her heart, it seemed, continued to hit the windshield as they fell from the sky.
She won't make a sound,
Alone in this fight with herself,
And the fears, whispering,
If she stands, she'll fall down.
She wants to be found,
The only way out is through everything,
She's running from, wants to give up, and lie down.
In less than five minutes, she had dropped the phone, ran to her car, drove to the main building, parked the car, and dashed through the now pouring rain. She caught sight of two figures standing in the rain, no umbrella, no cover, only the two of them, one a tad shorter that the other. As she neared them, she recognized her Godmother, Elena, and her god sister, Violet. They met one another's eyes, and, through the pouring rain, Alex could see the tears falling from their sad eyes, along with the falling rain.
Stand in the rain, stand your groundStand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain,
You won't drown
And one-day what's lost can be found
So stand in the rain
She looked at them with an impassive face, and turned away, walking into the main building. Her blue jeans, red shirt and bare feet were soaking wet, and she had to blink a few times before being able to see in the blinding white light. The flaming red hair was plastered to her face, but she couldn't feel it, she still felt numb, and, though she wouldn't show it then, terrified.
Once her eyes adjusted, she found Rufus and Tseng standing in the direct center of the room, not meeting her gaze. She bit her teeth into her lower lip once more, and slowly began to walk toward them. She looked at the ground to her right, watching the clean white tile without seeing it. It was something her mother always did when he was upset.
"Where are they?"
What I've DoneIn this farewell, there's no blood,
There's no alibi,
And I've drawn regret, from the truth, of a thousand lies
So let mercy come, and wash away
What I've done.
Tseng looked toward the staircase, and Alex followed it to a sign that read 'Hospital wing'. She looked back at him, for more direction, and he quietly said "Room 3127"
Her chest ached, of more her soul. She began to walk toward the stairs, thinking about the number. Of all numbers, it had to be that. It was practically their family number. One reason was that 31 was Rude's age when she was born, and 27 was Reno's. But it wasn't only that. She was born March 12th, Reno was born January 27th, and rude was born July 21st. 3-12; 1-27; 7-21.
She ascended the stairs, her feet feeling like stones from dread. How could she have told her parent, only the night before last, that she hated them? And all because of some stupid party? She was going to apologize last night, but they never came home. And one she would never be able to apologize to.
Reno, however, was still alive, though not for long, she could still try to ask for forgiveness.
I'll face myself, to cross out what I've becomeErase myself and let go of what I've done.
Put to rest, what you thought of me,
While I clean this slate with the hands of uncertainty
So let mercy come, and wash away what I've done.
Bright lights shone dim upon her, She still seemed in a daze, and it was only a matter of time until terminal shock set in. But she wouldn't slip into that until after she had seen her mother, not until after she had apologized for her acrid words. Her eyes wandered along the walls, reading the number plates as she went. Pain nagged at the edges of her soul, as she got closer and closer to 3127.
Everything within dropped as she found her self standing in-between the rooms 3126 and 3128. Salt tears began to fill her eyes as she slowly turned around, and she knew the pain was plain in her eyes. With a deep breath, she tried to compose herself before opening the door. If Reno was going to die, than he was going to die in peace. Never would she ever let him die with the pain of leaving his daughter behind.
You Can Let GoIt was killing me to see one of the strongest men I ever knew,
Wasting away to nothing, in that hospital room
"He's only hanging on for you." The doctor said sadly, but Alex barely heard him, her eyes trained on the dying man in the hospital bed not far away. His flaming red hair was matted, and parts were a darker red where blood had drenched his hair. Scars and scratches covered his face, and his blue-green eyes were open, watching her with a sort of sad gleam in them.
My voice and heart were breaking,
As I crawled up in his bed.
She gently crawled onto the bed beside her mother, stroking his face in comfort. He watched her walk around the bed, and a faint smile spread across his face. "Hey, kiddo."
"What's up, mom?" She asked, no emotion in her eyes but comfort. "Beat yourself up pretty good, didn't you."
Reno's smile faded, and more than physical pain entered his eyes. "I… am so sorry, Alex. Ru…" Tears began to fall, as he looked at the closed curtain beside us, and Alex didn't dare look behind her, knowing that her father was behind them, motionless, and never moving again. She slowly wiped a tear away and gently kissed his forehead.
"Sh…I should be the sorry one. I don't hate you guys. I didn't mean, I swear!"
"I know"
"And I wanted to say sorry when you came home, I was going to tell d…"
"He knew you didn't mean it." Reno said, grabbing her hand and gently rubbing his thumb along the skin. "You are a teenager, and you have me in you, so…you should always be a." He started coughing, and Alex leapt to her feet, eyes wide in terror. But the coughing ceased, and he grabbed her hand once more. When he spoke, his voice was weaker. "You should always be a teenager."
"Wish I could say the same for you."
"I was gonna die sometime. My only regret is that I couldn't be there to see you get married, and Rude won't be there to walk you down the isle…I'm sorry."
"It's okay, you'll be fine soon, and all the pain will go away, and you'll see dad soon, too."
"And what of you?" Reno asked, his voice pained, and she brushed a strand of red hair from his face.
"I'll join you when my works done. I promise you will see me when the time is right."
She didn't sound anything like a sixteen year old who was about to lose her last parent. This, at least, put Reno into a peaceful state of mind, seeing that this wouldn't ruin Alex's life. He knew she was going to cry, but she was going to cry alone, then pick herself up and continue on her journey of life. With a faint smile crossing his face, Reno gave a small nod, and was rewarded with the smile he loved to see from his daughter.
"See you soon, mom."
You can let go now, mommy, you can let goYour little girl is ready, to do this on her own.
It's gonna be a little scary, but I want you to know
I'll be okay, now, mommy, you can let go.
I looked up at my daughter, her eyes the same deep brown as her fathers, filled with courage, even as I began to slip into the eternal sleep. She brought my hand to her face, and I gently brushed the tip of my fingers against the flaming red hair, same as mine. She was right about the pain, physical at least, but it still hurt me to leave her so soon, and so young. It had been a short sixteen years, and there was so much I still had to do with her.
"I love you." She said, and kissed the palm of my hand. I could just see the tear forming in her eyes, and before I could say something, she told me "Tell dad I love him, too."
"I'm sure he knows." I said, and felt my eyes start to close. When she spoke, it began to sound as if I was sailing away, sailing away from this earth.
"Still. I'll see you soon."
"See you always."
Then I fell into the sleep in which I would never wake.
Leave Out All the Rest I dreamed I was missing, you were so scaredBut no one would listen, because no one cared.
After my dreaming, I woke with this fear.
What am I leaving when I'm don here?
So if you're asking me, I want you to know.
When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some reason to be missed
Don't resent me,
And when you're feeling empty, keep me in your memory
And leave out all the rest.
Once I had identified the bodies, don't ask why I had to, it was only because I was the only family, I left as soon as I could. They looked scarier dead, and the new hole in my chest, the hole that would never be filled, was killing me. I had to let this all out, and it wasn't until I was in the car that I let loose. Tears fell without stop, and I sobbed all by self, knowing that when I went home, the pain would only be greater. No one would be home to hold me; no one would be there to tell me everything would be fine. That was sort of okay, because I didn't want some one to lie to me and tell me that everything was going to be fine, when it wasn't.
It was a miracle that I had gotten past Tseng, Rufus, Elena, and violet without being seen. They wouldn't have let me go home. But I wanted…no, I needed to go home. Still crying my eyes out, I put the car in drive, and pulled out of the parking lot. It was a little after five in the morning, and the early birds were arriving to work, some good friends of my parents, who had no idea what bad news was to meet them.
Great. Through my tears, I laughed. With more people who knew what happened, more people would come to the house to get me and try to comfort me. Out of everyone I was the closest to the two Turks, obviously. And everyone would be all, 'aw, I am so sorry, is there anything I can get you?' and 'things can't get lower than this.'
I pulled into my parents' driveway. Tears still poured from my eyes, as I stared at the vacant and dark house. They weren't there, and they were never returning. I wiped my nose on my sleeve, feeing so small, and helpless. Really, I was both. I was helpless; at least until tomorrow, and small, compared to the world, I was itsy bitsy.
The door was unlocked, just as I had left it, and the only lights on were the ones in the living room. The phone was buzzing, as no one was on the other line. I picked it up, putting it back in it's holder, and turned to the living room, my heart almost stopping at what I saw.
Reno was sitting on the couch, his hands around me. Rude was standing in front of the television set, putting something in the DVD player. He looked the same as he did when he left yesterday morning, along with Reno, and even I was wearing what I was wearing now, but the other me, the one in Reno's arms, was neat, and her clothes weren't wet, or tear stained.
"Genius at everything else, but you can't figure out a stupid home video?"
My jaw dropped as he sounded like he was right there. It didn't even sound like a dream, he sounded as if he was right beside me. Rude looked over at him, giving him the 'leave me alone, I know what I'm doing look.'
Then, he turned and looked directly at me, just as the movie began to play, and gave me his warm, fatherly smile. "I forgave you right after you said it, Alex." He said, his voice sounding so comforting to me. But he disappeared as the first image came on.
Reno and the other Alex looked at me too, and they both smiled, the exact same smile. Then they were gone as Rude's voice came from the television set.
"If she's anything like you, she's going to hate the color pink." Rude said, and I slowly walked in front of the TV set. Reno was on the screen, holding up a little baby size outfit. He looked up at the camera, and tossed the outfit over his shoulder.
"Tseng gave it to me." He said, as I slowly sat down staring at the video that took place in this very room.
"Have you though of a name for her?"
"Rena?" My mother suggested, looking back in the box that was set between his legs. That's when I realized just how large he was.
"Wonder where you got that one." Rude said, and I could just picture him rolling his deep brown eyes. "What about Alexandra?"
"Hmmm. Too long." Then his blue green eyes brightened as he glanced up at the camera once more. "What about Alex?"
It was silent for a moment, and I was so desperate for the sound of their voices, that I even considered fast forwarding it, but I didn't move, eyes glued to my 27 year old mother. Really, this would make anyone else begin to ball his or her eyes out, but not I, this made me stop crying, and I began to feel better. As if they were really there.
"I like it." Rudes voice said, and Reno smiled, pulling out another outfit. He twisted it so it was facing the camera. I felt tears coming back, but I fought them off, my head still slightly throbbing from my last break down. What the shirt read, was 'daddy's little girl' and a few hearts were on it.
The scene changed suddenly, and the camera was in Reno and Rude's room. But this time, Reno wasn't on the camera, but Rude was, dressed in his black pants and pristine white shirt. His tan hand rested on a slightly paler figure that lay on his chest, just a tad bigger than his hand. A tuft or bright red informed me that this was me, and the date informed me that it was a five month old me.
I Miss YouSha la la la la
Sha la la la la
You used to call me your angel
Said I was sent straight down from heaven.
You'd hold me close in your arms,
I loved the way you felt so strong
"Reno, come look at this." The bald man said, beckoning with his free hand. The camera moved, rather un-smoothly, might I add. The camera zoomed in on my little baby face, eyes closed in peace, and my mouth slightly open. "Say her name." Rude said from off camera.
"Hey Alex." Reno said, and I slowly opened my eyes, a dark brown then, and I looked up at my mother, and laughed, holding out one little arm. Reno set the camera on the nightstand near by, and I saw him pick me up, giving me a kiss on the head. "Hey angel."
"She looks so much like you." Rude said, still on the bed, watching the two of us. "And if she acts anything like you, we're in a heap of trouble."
"I'm not that bad." Reno said, looking at him, while slowly starting to rock back and forth with little me in his arms.
"No, just annoying sometimes."
"Sometimes." The red head agreed.
"Sing her to sleep."
Reno smiled and began to hum a song, but I couldn't hear it clearly on the camera. But when he actually started singing, tone deaf as he was, he still sounded wonderful. "Nothing's gonna to harm you, not while I'm around. Nothing gonna, darling, not while I'm around. Demons are prowling everywhere, now-a-days. I'll send them howlin' I don't care. I got ways."
I actually began to fall asleep, not just the baby on camera, but the sixteen year old off camera as well. Yes, that song from Sweeney Todd was my lullaby, and still is, apparently.
"No ones gonna hurt you, no ones gonna dare. Others may desert you, not to worry, with so I'll be there. Demons will…charm you…I'm …"
I was out cold.
I never wanted you to leave.
I wanted you two to stay here holding me.
I miss you two, I miss you're smiles
And I still shed a tear, every once in a while.
And even though it's different now, you're still here some how.
My heart won't let you go, and I need you to know
I miss you,
Sha la la la la
I miss you.
Oh how I wish you two could see,
Everything that's happenin' for me
I'm thinking back on the past, it's true time is flying by to fast!
I miss you two, I miss you're smiles
And I still shed a tear, every once in a while.
And even though it's different now, you're still here some how.
My heart won't let you go, and I need you to know
I miss you,
Sha la la la la
I miss you.
I know you're both in a better place, yeah!But I wish I could you're faces, Oh!
I know you're where you need to be,
Even though you're not here with me!
I miss you two, I miss you're smiles
And I still shed a tear, every once in a while.
And even though it's different now, you're still here some how.
My heart won't let you go, and I need you to know
I miss you,
Sha la la la la
I miss you.
EndSongs, in order of appearance
What hurts the most by Rascal Flats
Stand in the rain by Superchick
What I've done by Linkin Park
You can let go by Crystal Shawanda
Leave out all the rest by Linkin Park
I Miss You by Miley Cyrus
~Uhm…Yeah, I had this for over a year now, and I just kinda remembered it, so I was like 'Hey! should love this! It's pretty Old, and I just thought maybe Reno and Rude Fans would like to read it. Any way, I don't own Reno or Rude, But Alex is all mine… Hope you liked it. Don't really care about reviews for this one, it's just something I stumbled across going through all my old things…