BPOV
It's my entire fault. I should never have lead him on like that. It's my fault I'm here.
Everything was going perfectly. I had met the love of my life in Edward. He's everything I could ever want. I told you about him but you acted like you didn't care. I didn't know you remembered that time when we were kids. I had forgotten long ago. I shouldn't have made you think it was ok. I only thought of you as a friend, a sibling. I never about my actions back then. I was selfish and I used you. Now that I think about it, it's not much of a surprise that you did what you did. I just can't believe how far this went. Maybe you really did think I wanted it. Maybe you thought I was too shy or playing hard to get. Maybe you thought they were screams of pleasure instead of pain. They weren't. I wonder what you think now. If you realized I didn't want you. If you realized I never did. I wonder if you regret doing what you did. I wonder if you regret leaving me there. Did you ever move me from the bed or did someone else? I'm losing parts of my memory. I still remember trying to push you off of me but you were too strong. You told me not to struggle. Maybe I shouldn't have. Maybe then I would still be with my Edward, not here six feet under the ground. If I could go back in time I definitely would. I would make sure I never kissed you when we were so little, that I never made you believe I liked you that way. Maybe that's why you let me die, because you realized I never really wanted you. All I have to say now is I'm so sorry Jacob Black, I really am. I've thoroughly ruined us all.