Written for Kurtofsky Winterfest Days 3 and 4: Warm and Cozy/My Creys
Title: Something Blue
By: Rubylis
Rating: PG-13 for subject matter.
Summary: When Dave and Kurt vowed for better or worse, they never expected to make a sacrifice like this.
Warning: References to rape, HIV; anti-Blaine.
"So."
"So."
Kurt tapped his pen agitatedly on top of the yet to be signed divorce papers. "We're really going through with this?"
"...yes…"
"You first." Kurt threw the papers at David's chest. The pen followed. He crossed his arms, glaring defiantly at his spouse, silently challenging him to end seven years of marriage. Wordlessly, David signed and slid the paperwork back across the table. Kurt's lip trembled. No. He wasn't going to cry. He blinked quickly, fighting to hold onto what little resolve he had left. He focused on the law books lining their attorney's office. "I told you what happened."
"I know."
"He forced me, I couldn't-"
"Kurt, " Dave interrupted quietly, "I know."
Kurt rolled the pen between his fingers, stalling. "Then why won't you forgive me?"
"Nothing you've done deserves forgiving."
"Oh, that's rich!" Kurt snapped. I have scars, David, scars from you shoving me into lockers. But I don't deserve forgiveness?"
"Hey!" Hurt and anger crept into Dave's voice. "That's not what I said." He came around the table to Kurt's side and took a seat, gauging his reaction. When Kurt didn't flinch away, he scooted his chair closer to the table. "You forgive people when they've done something wrong. You," Dave said firmly, emphatically, "did nothing wrong. Nothing, Kurt."
"It isn't fair." Kurt turned, snuffling into his sleeve but he was not, he bit his lip, definitely not crying.
"Fair? Kurt, this fucking sucks! I don't want this any more than you do. But we're out of ideas. And we're out of time." David laid his hand over Kurt's, their wedding bands clinking at the gesture. "I am and will always be your husband. To protect you…in sickness and in health. And if I have to divorce you to take care of you, then that's what I'll do."
"How fucked up is that?" Kurt said bitterly.
"We've been over this. We agreed." Reluctantly, Kurt nodded. "We can't afford the HIV meds you need on our own. And as long as we're married, our income disqualifies you for assistance from the drug company."
"By two thousand dollars."
"Two thousand seventeen dollars and thirty-six cents, actually." David said with a tight smile, hoping to lighten the mood. He handed the pen to Kurt. With a sigh, Kurt signed the papers, officially dissolving his marriage.
David watched Kurt fluff his pillow and spread his blanket out on the couch as he had for the past few months. Normally, Dave would say "goodnight" and "I love you" and give him as much space as he seemed to need. Today, though, today there had been progress. As horrible as this day had been, still, there were moments of progress, too, that gave him hope. He had been able to sit by Kurt. Even take his hand. For the first time since his husband-and, yes, in Dave's mind they were still as much a couple as they had ever been-had been raped.
So, tonight, he lingered when Kurt prepared to go to sleep. Until, finally, Kurt noticed his presence. Dave smiled affectionately. "Wanna come to bed?"
Kurt ducked his head sheepishly. "I'm good."
Dave took a gamble and perched on the arm of the couch. Kurt drew his knees to his chest but it seemed natural, not a sign of withdrawing.
"Look, I just gotta say this, okay? If you're sleeping here because you're pissed about the divorce? Fine. If it's because you're uncomfortable sleeping with me? Okay. I can live with that. But, Kurt, if you're staying on the couch because you're scared of infecting me? Fuck that. And fuck Blaine Anderson. We're not letting him have that kind of hold over us, Kurt."
"I know." But Kurt made no move to take his pillow and blanket into the bedroom.
Dave stood. "Goodnight." He fished for something else to say, something better, something that would make everything better and still came back to, "I love you."
"I love you, too."
"David?" Kurt's voice sounded plaintively in the darkness of their bedroom.
Dave turned on the reading light and rolled over. "…hey, babe…"
Kurt shuffled over to the side of the bed, pillow in hand. "I'm cold." Dave flipped back the covers and moved over. "Do you think it's safe?"
"As safe as anything is in life."
Kurt threw his pillow on bed then climbed in, turning on his side and scooting back until he felt David's body warm and cozy against his.