Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. :)
Change in Scenery
written by ameo
Lily was crying frustrated tears now. She was sitting on a bench in the courtyard. There were other students scattered about, but no one seemed to notice her frustrated tears. And if they did notice, they assumed she'd want her own space, which was technically true.
Lily wasn't sure what to think about him anymore. She just couldn't understand how he could do this--how he could just ruin his entire life--
She wiped her eyes with the palms of her hands and sniffed. She had thought she had made a difference…
She shook her head. No; she had obviously thought wrong about him.
A hand touched her shoulder, and she instinctively slapped it away, feeling the hint of warmth. "Go away, Severus!" she snapped, crossing her arms and looking the other way.
"Severus? You're not talking about Snape, are you?"
Her head whirled around to see her fellow Head, James. She sighed. "Nothing, never mind--I thought you were someone else."
James moved so he was standing in front of her. "You thought I was Snape." he stated.
Lily nodded. "Yes," she sniffed. "Yes I did."
"Well, no offense, Lily," James said. "But why would he want to talk to you?"
Lily opened her mouth to answer, but nothing came out. She had thought he was different. She had thought he wouldn't be so stupid--
"Lily?"
She broke out of her small trance. "Wha--?"
"You zoned out for a second, there." James said, now sitting on the bench next to her. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, as if he were hesitating on his choice of words. "Why are you crying?" he finally asked.
Why was she crying anyway? It wasn't her business what he did--and yet…
"Because a friend of mine just threw his life away." she found herself saying.
…it was her business.
James raised his eyebrows, obviously making the connections. "Snape," he whispered to himself, but, she was grateful, he didn't make any rude or unnecessary comments about her friend.
"Yes," she stated with a voice slightly higher than a whisper. "He's just so--so--so infuriating!" Her voice cracked, and she felt new tears coming to her eyes. She wiped her eyes in a frustrated fashion with her hand.
"Here," James said, holding out a handkerchief. She gratefully took it and dabbed her eyes.
There was another silence. Lily was wringing the handkerchief in her lap, and she could feel James staring at her.
"What did he do?" James asked, though she knew that he already knew.
She laughed bitterly. "He's joined them!" she said loudly, then, realizing how loud she said it, she lowered her voice. "Severus has joined You-Know-Who!" She wiped her eyes again.
James's eyes had widened for two seconds before softening. "If it helps," he said quietly. "I bet Snape is,--er, um--a good person if you call him a friend." he said awkwardly.
Lily smiled; it took a lot of courage for him to say that, but her smile turned to a frown. "I called him a friend; past tense, not present." she corrected.
"I wasn't finished." James said, seeming to disregard her statement. "Because Snape is, um, a good enough person to be friends with you, I bet he felt pressured to join You-Know-Who."
Lily looked at him, eyebrows raised curiously. "That doesn't matter--"
"Yes it does, Lily." James interrupted softly. "Haven't you ever felt pressured to do something you didn't want to do?"
Yes.
"No," she said, ignoring her thoughts. "I do what I think is right."
She knew he didn't believe her, but he didn't argue with her.
"Okay…" James trailed off. "But I still think you should keep that thought in mind."
She wanted to cry again.
"And besides," he continued. "Who in their right mind would want to actually join You-Know-Who? Completely mental, they are." he added.
The corners of her mouth twitched upwards, as if she was going to smile. She sighed deeply. "I didn't think he would actually do it." she whispered, her voice was cracking again.
"To tell you the truth, me neither." James admitted. "Though I have to admit, a little part of me knew."
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Oh, so you already knew he would join even though you didn't even know him?" She snorted. "Oh, that's rich."
"No!" he argued. "That's not what I meant. You're taking apart my sentences and analyzing them too deeply."
She avoided his eyes. He moved so he was looking at her again.
"Lily, listen to me," he took a hold of her shoulders, and she suddenly felt a burst of warmth in her stomach area. "You just have to expect the unexpected during a war." he said.
She finally looked into his eyes, sighing. "I wish he didn't," she said quietly. James put his arms around her and held her while tears began to flow again. "I wish he would stand up for himself--" she couldn't speak anymore. She was hugging James back now; tingling sensations filled her stomach.
"It's okay, Lily." James was whispering in her ear soothingly. "Everything is going to be okay."
"But how do you know that?" she choked out, her head still buried in his shoulder. "How do you know?" she looked into his eyes.
He stared back. "Because I know you, and I know that you'll make everything okay." He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. "You're Lily: this amazing person who brings happiness to everything she touches."
Lily didn't know what to say to that. She knew he was right. He knew that she knew that she was going to make everything right eventually. She hated how much he knew her, how much he made her stomach tingle with warmth every time he touched her…Maybe if she did this--
Across the courtyard, a boy many recognized as Severus Snape watched the scene. His eyes narrowed at James Potter, the boy who had gotten to her before he could. He briefly pictured himself across the courtyard; it was him in James Potter's shoes. It was him who was kissing Lily right this second…he couldn't stand it any longer. He walked away, resisting the urge to look over his shoulder back at them…
--maybe if she did this, things would be better. The tingling sensations in her stomach were comforting, and things eventually got better. But then again, she thought happily, things were simply magnificent when she was with him. James.