"No Cyrus,"
"Sir,"
"Cyrus, if we ask her for help, for this. Cyrus, she'll…"
"Never forgive you." Cyrus finished for him.
"She'll,"
"Be angry, but you and I both know she's the only one we can trust to handle this without any fallout." Fitz didn't quite agree, asking for her help would result in the greatest fallout of all, losing her trust.
"Do it," he said bracing himself for what was going to be a bumpy ride ahead.
He had not seen nor spoken to Olivia Pope since she resigned from the White House over a year ago. He knew that she kept in close contact with Cyrus, who was a close personal friend and mentor. He knew that she also remained in contact with his children. That she was completely accessible to them. He knew that they received care packages from her at least once a month at boarding school, twice if there was a special occasion like a birthday, or good grades.
To his credit, Cyrus tried to keep Fitz from having to come face to face with Olivia, buy denying the allegations from Amanda Tanner, but in hindsight, he should have known that she would insist.
"He wants the favour. He wants my services. I do not work for him anymore. So you tell the President of the United States, to make time." Olivia said to Cyrus as she straightened out his tie. She gave his cheek a light pat before walking away leaving him shaking his head.
Olivia was well aware of the tone of disapproval in Steven's voice as he questioned her decision to meet with the President at Camp David. As her token best friend from childhood, he got to question her judgment. After all, it was he that stood by her through it all. He was there when it all began, he was there when they reached their tough spots, and he was there when she got her heart broken. She gave Steven a look that begged for understanding. She had to do it, it was her duty to her country, but she knew just as well as he did that this was the opportunity she had been wanting to see him again. After eighteen months of not seeing him, not talking to him, she longed to see him. The ache of his absence in her life never wavered in eighteen months. She managed to put one foot in front of the other, launch a successful business, but her heart still longed only for him.
Her heart stopped when Cyrus had told her about Amanda Tanner, surely he wouldn't. Cyrus insisted he wasn't that guy, and she didn't want to believe he was, so she promised to do it, providing that he passed her gut.
After exchanging pleasantries with Mellie, she, Cyrus and Fitz went for a walk. As Cyrus who was walking behind them filled her in on Amanda Tanner, as she flipped through the file he gave her. She tried to keep focused on what he was saying instead of the their close proximity.
"I have to ask…"
"No, I never, I would never, No. You've known me a long time, longer than most. You know there is only one person I love." He said looking right at her. He almost had her completely convinced when she saw something in his eyes. In that same moment he knew that she knew. The look of regret and apology immediately stared at her in the face.
"Cy, could you give us a minute? We'll meet you back at the residence." Fitz requested, his eyes never leaving Olivia's, the look of hurt and betrayal pooled in her eyes as she tried to compose herself. Cyrus gave them both a nod and headed back to the residence. He signaled for Tom and Hal to fall back and give them room.
"Liv," he said reaching for her but she jumped back so fast that all he caught was the air between them.
"Don't!"
"Liv, it's not what you think."
"Then what is it Fitz?"
"You left me," the pain evident in his voice.
"How was it going to work Fitz? You and I sneak around behind closed doors, steal a kiss here and there. Plan a weekend when Mellie isn't around. How was that a life for either of us? You can be mad at me all you want Fitz, but somewhere deep down you knew it was the right thing to do. I didn't exactly have you knocking my door down begging me to stay. I just did what you weren't brave enough to do."
"Liv,"
"So much for being the love of your life."
"Livvy no, Amanda. I was miserable, it was one night, it didn't mean anything. Liv please." He begged.
"I think I knew the moment Cy told me that it wasn't just an empty accusation. Did I honestly think that we were different?" she said dropping her gaze. Fitz took her face with both hands,
"We are different. I love you, I have always and will always love you." He pleaded for her to believe him. His one mistake undid everything. They may have always known that what they were doing was wrong, but Liv had never questioned his feelings, until that moment, and it killed him to see it. Olivia removed his hands from her face,
"I'll handle Amanda Tanner. Consider it handled." She said heartbrokenly not looking at him at all. Without waiting for another word she left, not bothering to say goodbye to Cyrus or Mellie leaving Fitz to deal with the questions himself.
When she got back to the office Steven took one look at her and silently followed her to her office and closed the door behind him.
"Liv,"
"He had, he…I thought," Olivia said somewhat incoherently.
"Liv, sweetheart." Unable to speak Olivia handed him the file on Amanda Tanner.
"FUCK!" he said out loud before he could reel it in. Olivia almost smiled,
"I know right. Here I was thinking what we had was actually different. What did I expect? That he cheat on his wife, but not his mistress?"
"Liv, he loves you." If Steven knew one thing about their relationship, it's that Fitz loved her. He never would have condoned it for as long as he did if he didn't believe that. Olivia just scoffed in disbelief.
"Do you want me to punch him in the face?" he offered feeling a little helpless.
"Oh Stevie, I think they may just have laws against causing bodily harm on the leader of the free world, and we both know you'd never make it past the Secret Service Detail, but thank you for loving me that much," she replied offering him the best smile she could when she felt that her whole world just fell apart. Everything she believed in, what she tried so hard to preserve, shattered by one act of carelessness.
Olivia and Stephen worked side by side gathering as much information on Amanda Tanner as they could. A couple of hours later Olivia was sitting next to Amanda Tanner on a park bench as Steven stood close by as a witness.
"Amanda are you sure you want to go through with this? Because once you've thrown this out there, there's no turning back. Monica Lewinsky was telling the truth too and she got eviscerated. This is a cruel city Amanda, it's unforgiving, and once you say this out loud, you can kiss your career goodbye. Not just in DC, but every prominent city there is. No one will hire someone with a sex scandal attached to them, least of all one attached to the President. So tell me what you really want, because I think you are much too bright to throw it all away for what, one night?" Olivia felt sick to her stomach as she watched Amanda fall apart. She sensed that all Amanda wanted was acknowledgement that it happened.
"You and I both know this can get very ugly, very quickly. Your reputation will be dragged into mud, your family and whatever history they have will be involved too. Are you ready for that?" Olivia tried with as much compassion as she could prepare her for what was in stored to make her weigh the consequences and whether it was worth all that. At the end of the day, it was always going to be worse for her than it would be for him.
The moment she and Steven walked into their office Olivia headed straight for the bathroom and threw up, when she finally emerged from the stall Steven was standing there with her toothbrush, a small towel and a bottle of water. She took the items from him gratefully as she handed him her phone.
"Call Cyrus, tell him it's handled." Steven nodded and dialed Cyrus number,
"Hey Liv," he answered looking at Fitz who had been distraught since her departure,
"It's Steven Finch,"
"Hey Steven," Cyrus replied surprised. Fitz's head snapped up questioning why Steven was calling instead of her,
"It's handled." Stephen said before hanging up leaving Cyrus a little confused. Glad that their situation had been handled but worried that they had pushed Olivia too far. Just as Steven was about to hand Olivia the phone, she ran back into the stall and threw up once more.