Disclaimer: Gundam Seed is forever not mine. (sniff)
A/n: Well, I posted this fic on my LJ when there was a server overload. I decided to get my lazy fingers moving. Okay, enough of this talk. Go on, read, and review, okay? Oh and, just so you know, a Lunatic is a white furry rabbit in the Ragnarok Online world, with no visble feet. Okay, we got that covered, now on with the fic!
Setting: The park. It's 12:00 pm. I wonder why they haven't eaten lunch yet. Dopes.
"Hey, Athrun!" Kira Yamato hollered.
The raven-haired Coordinator froze at his call. Gee, and I was trying to pretend I didn't have any connection to that guy whatsoever, Athrun thought.
"What the hell do you want, angst man number one?" he said harshly.
"Well, Mr. I-self-destruct-my-Gundams-for-no-reason-at-all, I just wanted to show you my new Lunatic discman! Lunatics are all the rage today!" Kira ranted. He held out his furry discman for all to see.
"So? That's nothing compared to my 'Cagalli crate'!" Athrun retorted, and on cue, a large box fell out of the sky.
Kira wrinkled his nose. "And what exactly is inside that box?" The amethyst-eyed boy asked.
"Cagalli's stuff, of course!" Athrun said, like it was no big deal. "Cagalli's toothbrush from three months ago, Cagalli's empty perfume bottle, even a few strands of her hair! Oh joy..." he then counted off all the things Cagalli had ever touched.
"Hey, guys!" Nicol, the gay, said. Dearka and Yzak, who stayed at least ten feet from Nicol so as not to be thought of as a homo, were behind him.
"Yamato! Athrun! Hey!" Dearka shouted, even though they were less than a meter apart.
"Quit yelling, Elsman!" Kira screamed.
"You're yelling too!"
"Well you started it!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"Did not!"
"Why are you here anyway?" Kira asked, no longer yelling.
"Well, I just wanted to show everyone my new Lunatic bowl! Now I can pour my cup noodles into it and eat it!" Dearka said proudly, holding up the furry white bowl. His eyes were sparkling.
"Why not just eat it in the cup?" Athrun said skeptically.
"I thought you got over your addiction for noodles!" Kira pointed out.
"Well, why the hell do you care!" Dearka shrieked, looking wild-eyed.
"This is great," Yzak said sarcastically. "First I have a friend who's recently turned bisexual, and now I have a friend who's insane. Oh, yeah, my life rocks."
"Do you have any Lunatic merchandise?" Kira wondered.
"As a matter of fact I do, Yamato," Yzak said coolly. He took out a Lunatic tape recorder from his pocket and pressed the 'on' button.
" Hey, Yamato, mahangin ba sa labas (Is it windy outside)?" Yzak's voice rang. "You know, I think Yamato's hair is actually a toupee!"
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Everyone laughed.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Kira whined.
"It means," Athrun said while trying not to laugh, "Your hair looks like it's always hit by the wind, 'coz it's always messy!"
"Idiot," Yzak's voice sneered through the tape recorder.
"What's a toupee?"
"Well you'll never guess what I got!" Nicol cut in. He took out a small Lunatic and placed it on the ground. He then took out a remote and pushed some buttons on it. The furry bunny with no visible feet bounced around the park.
"It's a Lunatic robot!" Nicol said excitedly.
"It's a lunatic alright," Yzak said sardonically as the robot continuously hit a tree.
"Well I got a big crate of Cagalli's used things right here!" Athrun grinned and patted one side of the huge box.
"Oookaay..."
Little did they know that a hidden camera was broadcasting this scene to a Haro-shaped TV, which Mr. Pink was watching while sipping on a bottle of engine oil. It was wearing a mask and cape, so it will be known as Lifesaver Haro.
"People are supposed to be crazy for Haros, not Lunatics!" Lifesaver Haro yelled, and the bottle of oil landed on his servant, Oink Haro (who had pig's ears and a snout).
I knew I should have applied for baker's assistant instead, oink, it thought.
Lifesaver Haro, meanwhile, went on with his ranting and raving.
"Once, Haros were adored and worshipped. Anyone who's anyone would buy Haro merchandise, no matter how high the price!"
It paused for a while, and then spoke again. "I must put a stop to this Lunatic madness, or else I won't get rich for selling Haro products!" And with that, it started to fly away, when suddenly a whistle sounded.
"Eh?"
"Stop right there!" a police Haro shouted, blocking the pink Haro's path.
"And why should I stop? I'm going to save Haros from extinction!" Lifesaver Haro said hotly.
"Well, you can't, because it's traffic!" the police Haro retorted.
"There can't be traffic in here! This is my room! It's impossible!"
"This is anime, ya old bum, anything is possible."
Suddenly there was a loud BOOM! and seconds later, a couple dozen Haros zoomed past, and oh, there was a huge hole on the wall.
"My WALL! Nooooo!" Lifesaver Haro cried in agony.
The mall, gay section...
"Why do I have to carry all your useless gay stuff?" Yzak complained.
"Well you did lose to Dearka when you flipped a coin," Nicol said while examining a Lunatic pencil case.
"I bet he cheated!" Yzak accused. "Dearka, let me see that coin again!"
"Sorry, I already used it up in the arcade," Dark answered.
"We never went to the arcade."
And your point is?"
"You belong to a nuthouse."
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Do not!"
Dearka took out a pair of sais (which he stole from Raphael from Ninja Turtles), and started to charge towards Yzak.
"Dark, please don't kill Sack-I mean Yzak," Nicol said. "Or else no one's gonna carry my stuff, unless you want to."
"Geez, okay, I won't kill him," Dearka said sullenly and dropped his weapons.
"Here Yzak, hold this for me!" Nicol said cheerfully, throwing a one-ton Lunatic paperweight, which landed on Yzak's head. The boxes went flying, and Yzak lay on the floor.
"He's dead!" Nicol gasped. "Yzak's dead!"
"Yay!" Dearka cheered. Nicol gave him a dirty look. "I mean, no!"
"I'm not dead, you morons," Yzak grunted. He got up and rubbed his head. "Ow."
"NYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Lifesaver Haro flew over with a stiletto. "I'm gonna destroy all Lunatic merchandise!"
Everyone fell silent. Lifesaver Haro cleared its throat (assuming it had one).
"I said, 'I'm gonna destroy ALL Lunatic merchandise'!"
"Oh, sorry, oink," Oink Haro pressed a button on a remote and anvils fell out of the sky and flattened all the furry white rabbit products in existence. Lifesaver Haro had a smirk on its face as it flew away with his servant to celebrate its victory at who knows where (probably a Haro strip club).
"My Lunatics!" Nicol screeched.
"Well that ends the Lunatic frenzy," Dearks said, bored.
"Yay!" Yzak said. Nicol picked up one of the sais and glared at him. "I mean... no!"
A/n: Well that was crappy. Hope it's okay. Oh, yeah, Oink Haro belongs to steshin, okay? Leave a review! Now to eat lunch, I'm starving...
