Random announcer dude: This is... TUC(which AIA doesn't own) Survivor: An annoying little script story formated to fit the reality show (That is also not AIA-owned) that AIA used to watch. With your host: The Character Executioner!
AIA: -shoots look-
Random announcer dude: -cowers in fear- I mean... -shudders- with your host: AIA!
AIA: Better. -bows-
Readers: -halfheartedly cheer-
AIA: Ok, then. Do you all know how this works?
Readers: Not a clue.
AIA: I'll explain it then, okay?
Readers: Sure.
AIA: Well, there are two tribes with nine people-
Ripred: -clears throat- Ahem...
AIA: -glares- People and rats.
Ares: -clears throat-
AIA: -shoots look at Ripred again- People, rats, and bats-
Temp: -clicks in annoyance-
AIA: Oh for the love of Ripred! Can't the term people refer to everyone here?!?
Ripred: People love me?
AIA: -sighs- It's just an expression.
Ripred: Ha.
AIA: What was I even saying?
Ripred: I have no idea.
Gregor: Nine people...?
Ripred: And rats.
Ares: And bats.
Temp: Crawlers, too, there be, crawlers, too.
AIA: Oh, yes, right. There are two tribes of nine creatures. The tribes have to compete in challenges for immunity and rewards. The losers of each challenge vote someone off of their tribe.
Ripred: Ok, vote out Pearlpet now.
Bane: Twirltongue says I'm not a loser! I am king! I am not a loser!
Ripred: Why is he here again?
AIA: For comic relief. And because-
Bane: 73H 134N3 900N5!
Ripred: Wtf? Zom ths isnt aim
AIA: Argh! Enough of the chat speak! Don't make me kill you all of in one-shots!
Ripred: -.-
AIA: No chat faces, either!
Ares: -glares at Bane and Ripred- Can we get on with this? I have to get shunned by humanity later, I don't want to miss it.
AIA: Exactly! That's why we love you, Ares.
Ares: I mean you, too. Get on with it. I need to sulk and avoid people, maybe wear some tight pants and write poetry. I have to straighten my fur.
AIA: Fine. -cough-emo bat-cough-
Gregor: Leave him alone, okay?
AIA: Whatever.
Howard: -pokes AIA- Can you please get on with it, though? I have to get chased by fangirls later.
AIA: Where was I again?
Ripred: We get to vote the losers like Pearliegirlie off.
Bane: I am not a loser! I am king!
Twirltongue: That's right, Bane, you're the king. You tell them. Show them that you are king.
Gregor: Who invited her?
AIA: -glares- Someone with a death wish, obviously.
Ripred: Since you, AIA, are obviously incompetent enough to explain what happens, I will.
AIA: I'm competent!
Ripred: -growls- Then explain, already!
AIA: Fine, I will. Yeesh.
Ripred: Go on.
AIA: -glares- The nine tribes
Gregor: Nine tribes of nine people? We're having Ninety people here? I don't think there are that many characters. And you suck at making OCs, so don't even try.
AIA: At least I can do math! Nine times nine is eighty-one, you idiot!
Ripred: -exasperated- This is hopeless. My turn.
Luxa: Gregor is not an idiot!
AIA: And this is coming from the person who was poked in the eye by a two-year-old...
Luxa: -blushes, glares, draws sword-
AIA: -laughs- Don't try to kill me, I'm the most violent and lethal fanfic writer for TUC. I can kill you over and over in various painful ways. Or torture you.
Ripred: -loudly- AFTER NINE CREATURES ARE GONE, THE TRIBES MERGE INTO ONE TRIBE, UNLESS ONE TRIBE -cough- mine -cough- IS AMAZING ENOUGH TO GET THE OTHER ONE DOWN TO THREE MEMBERS.
Luxa: -oblivious- What is this "fanfic" and how do you kill someone with it?
AIA: -points to Gregor and the Plight of Flesh- It's a story. See that one? I killed you with a swarm of mites.
Luxa: -confused- I was not killed with a swarm of mites, though.
AIA: -sighs-
Ripred: Are you two done?
AIA: Mebbeh...
Ripred: What?
AIA: Maybe...
Bane: Chocolate!
Ripred: Whatever. After the merge, there is individual immunity from getting voted off, but only one dominant being -cough- me -cough- gets it.
AIA: Oh, are we already explaining about that?
Ripred: Where have you been?
AIA: I space out a lot
Ripred: Okay then...
AIA: Yep.
Twirltongue: -to Gregor softly- You're not an idiot... AIA's the idiot... you can kill AIA... then you'll be host.
Gregor: -in awe- Host? I can be host?
Twirltongue: Yes...
AIA: NO! No! You demonic rat! -prepares to slay-
Bane: Twirly! No! Don't kill Twirly!
Twirltongue: Don't call me Twirly!
Ripred: FOCUS! WHAT'S YOUR PLAN? TO START THIS EVER OR TO LET US DIE OF OLD AGE?!?!?
AIA: Chill out Ripred, are you PMSing or something?
Ripred: -glares-
Aurora: Can we start this ever?
AIA: Aurora! I didn't know you were here! I honestly didn't know what your voice sounds like. I've never heard you speak!
Aurora: -blushes-
Twitchtip: I knew she was here.
AIA: Oh, you're here, too! Excellent! Lets get started. then!
Ripred: -mutters- Thank me...
Ares: -cough- egotistical rat -cough
AIA: Yes, thank you Ares.
Howard: Let us start, then, shall we?
AIA: Yep!
Ripred: So...how do we pick the tribes?
AIA: Uh... school yard pick 'em?
Howard: What is a school?
Luxa: What is a yard?
Bane: What is a 'em?
Ripred: An. An 'em.
AIA: Figure it out on your own.
Twirltongue: I should be a captain...
AIA: Fine. Twirltongue's a captain!
Henry: Sexy Henry's here!
Luxa: -squeals- Henry!
Howard, Gregor, and AIA: Um... aren't you cousins?
Luxa: -blushes- Maybe...
Henry: In the Middle Ages in Europe, cousins used to marry each other all the time!
Ripred: In the Middle Ages in Europe, everyone had Hemophilia.
Ares: Shouldn't we be doing something?
Bane: -sings- Popular! You're gonna be Popular! I'll teach you the proper poise when you talk to boys, little ways to flirt and flounce.
Temp: Picking, we were, picking.
Bane: -still singing- Ooh! I'll show you what shoes to wear, how to fix your hair, everything that really-
Ripred, Twitchtip, and Twirltongue: -smack the Bane-
Bane: Ow!
Ripred: Cut it out! We're doing something productive!
AIA: Yes, we are. Twirltongue and Henry are captains.
Twirltongue: I want the Bane.
Ripred: Do you?
Twirltongue: He will be king. I do.
AIA: -shudders- Well, as long as this isn't TwirltonguexRipred, we're okay. Henry?
Henry: Luxa!
Everyone: No!
Henry: -looks at AIA- But... but...
AIA: No, Henry. Pick someone else.
Henry: -glares- Fine. Ares.
Ares: No.
Henry: Yes.
Ares: NO!
AIA: Go, Ares.
Ares: Bu..but.. but I'm awesome!
AIA: I know that. but we've already deprived Henry of one pick, so go ahead.
Ares: -sigh- let me get my fur straightener and eyeliner...
AIA, Ripred, Twitchtip, Twirtongue, Gregor, Howard, Luxa, Henry, Aurora, Bane, and Temp: -cough- emo bat -cough-
Ares: -glares-
Twirltongue: My pick?
AIA: Sure.
Twirltongue: AIA.
AIA: I'm the host. You can't pick me.
Twirltongue: Yes, I can.
AIA: But... no... you can't.
Twirltongue: Yes, I can.
AIA: Maybe you can...
Ripred: -hits AIA- No, she cant!
Twirltongue: -glares- Fine, then. I'll take the crawler.
Temp: Go, must I, go?
AIA: Sorry, Temp.
Henry: Henry's turn!
AIA: Yes.
Henry: Ooh! Ooh! I want Howard!
Howard: -sigh- Fine.
Twirltongue: My pick?
AIA: Yep.
Twirltongue: You there, in the back. Lizard-thing.
Frill: It'ssssssss Frrriiiiiiiiillllll.
AIA: Hey! It's Frill!
Twirltongue: Whatever. You're here.
Frill: -scowls-
AIA: Ok, whose pick?
Twirltongue: Mine.
AIA: Go ahead, Twirltongue.
Ripred: No, it's not her turn!
Henry: It's Henry's turn!
AIA: Fine! Just pick, everyone!
Henry: Luxa!
Everyone: No!
Henry: -protesting- but...but...
AIA: We've been through this already, Henry.
Henry: Fine. You there, Stripy bat!
Nike: Nike.
Henry: Yes, you. Cone over here.
Ares: -apathetic- company.
Howard: Ares, you have me, too...
Ares: Whatever.
Twirltongue: This is taking too long. Can I just pick the remaining -counts- six for my team.
AIA: Okay...
Twirltongue: Good. I'll take Luxa to keep her away from her inbreeding cousin, Silent bat with the yellow fur-
Aurora: Gold! Not yellow!
Twirltongue: Oh, lookie here, it speaks. That Halflander, the Warrior, the scentseer, and the crazy one in front there.
Hamnet: Me?
Twirltongue: -sarcastic- No, the other lunatic that hid in the jungle from his mother for ten years. Of course you!
Henry: So... I get... -glances around- Ripred, Cartesian, any random Henry Fangirl, plus Spencer and Aaron from Underoath.
AIA: -summons random Henry Fangirl-
Maeve: Henry!
Henry: The ladies loooove Henry!
Luxa: -glares from the other team-
AIA: Ok, that's all taken care of... Go build a camp.
Ripred: Where?
AIA: I don't know, wander the deadlands a bit...
Twirltongue: Ok, Team Twirltongue-
Twitchtip: I'm not referring to us as that.
Twirltongue: -shoots look- Are you ready?
Aaron: -sings- This is the moment that we all live for. Are you ready?
Spencer: -echoes, screaming- Are you ready?
Ares: -bobs his head to the hardcore music-
Twirltongue: No, no, no. You're on Henry's team. Not mine. Henry's.
Bane: Yay! Music! -attempts to headbang-
Henry: -hums along-
AIA: This is going to be a looooong game.
Ripred: You don't say.
AIA: I did say.
Ripred: Ugh. This is going to be a looooong game.
AIA: I just said that.
Bane: -falls over dizzily-
Howard: You should do the disclaimer now...
AIA: True dat.
Howard: You should not watch Teen Girl Squad.
AIA: True dat. I don't own that, though.
Ares: Underoath is freaken' sweet.
AIA: True dat. I don't own them. Or their lyrics, which happen to be from the song "I'm content With Losing"
Bane: -still on the ground- I'm surviving.
AIA: -coughs- I don't own Survivor. Are we done?
Howard: Us.
AIA: Ohh... I don't own any of the characters except for myself, and I don't own The Underland Chronicles, either.
Ripred: Are we done?
AIA: It's only just started...
Ripred: -groans-
Bane: -hums Popular-
AIA: Oh, and that. I don't own that. That's from Wicked. Which I don't own.