Author's Note:
The Professor: Hello, and welcome to Ambrose the Book-Wolf and the Torchwood Professor's story, "Never A Dull Moment". Well, this is the Potter fandom, and since the main character has an unusual incidence rate of fifteen hundred out of ten, there wouldn't be, would there?
Ambrose: That's why we decided we might as well snag the title while it was going - it is still free, right? Ah, who cares? Now, in order to get this party started, we need to do the disclaimer - Harry Potter and all other people, places, concepts, species', etc that are affiliated with the Harry Potter universe are the intellectual property of J.K. Rowling, and of course all those guys at Warner Bros. who do the movies probably own a bit too. Any and all other references to outside TV shows, movies, cartoons, books, etc, are not in any way inclined toward encroaching copyright. There we are then!
The Professor: Indeed. Now we can start the story, and bear with us on the science - since time travel isn't very well-documented, we're coming up with the laws you'll see on the spot. So - yah.
Ambrose: I think that's enough for now. Enjoy the story - and make sure you read and review, guys! This is the first chapter, and we NEED-TO-KNOW! Thanks.
(Chapter 1)
Where was it? It should be here, it should - oh, come on, it's one book (out of nearly two hundred hundred, his mind rebuked) in a VERY specific section, it really - ah ha! Gotcha! There was the sound of dust, wood and stone fragments sliding off onto a paved floor, and then that of a hand wiping off the left off fragments with a squeak-squeak of a sweaty hand - and then the sound of a flashlight being flicked on.
Harry James Potter peered through the impenetrable darkness irritably - and there, there! There it was, in plain, embossed (still gleaming after all this time in the light) words on the tightly bound leather cover of the book Harry had been searching for - for the last seven months. He gave a heady sigh of relief, which quickly turned into a gasp as the clip-clop of leather shoes echoed around him. He quickly stuffed the tome into his robe and sprang up onto his feet - just in time, it would seem, as Lucius and Draco Malfoy chose that second to enter the room.
Harry had his wand drawn in a second, trained between the two of them, and his mind was whirling like a bird for ways in which to escape - at least, it was, until Lucius began to speak. "Mr Potter. What brings you to our humble home?" His voice was the drawl it had been when Harry had met him nearly six years ago, and his eyes were still the cold gray merciless pools.
Harry felt his Adam's apple bob in panic and anger. He drove himself to speak - maybe if he could keep them talking, he could get himself out of here. "Oh, you know Lucy - the magnificent cuisine, the wonderful company, the erotic mermaid soap bars - " Harry's voice was scratchy and weak - it wasn't easy talking when you'd been hit with a Asphyxiation curse not three days ago, or when you would rather be hyperventilating.
" - or the wonderful book choice, I'm sure." Draco, the carbon copy of his father (save the disgusting scar that ran from his left temple to his ear - Harry felt the familiar strings of pride at Hermione's way with a wand run through him) cut in. "What with this being the library, I would assume that's what your looking for." Harry could see the itching behind Draco's eyes - the urge to belittle him, call him Scarhead, not so long ago abandoned as to be destroyed.
"Dracula! Glad you could join the party - it's not quite an evil confrontation without the baddies backed up and the goodies - well, not." Harry edged back slightly - this was Malfoy bloody Manor, surely there was a secret passageway that led the hell out of here!? He reached the wall, and grimaced inwardly - he really did have his back up against the wall. This couldn't be good. Nor could that scowl on Malfoy Jr's face . . .
Draco made as if to draw his wand, but Lucius stopped him, snapping his arm to the side - Harry noticed he had drawn his own wand - and saying, "Now, now, Draco - you should know better than to answer back to those less pure, and therefore less fortunate than us. Simply - " he leveled his wand at Harry as he said this, " - remove the impurity. And all will be well again."
"I'm sure you've got a lot of experience at that, Lucy - I've seen your fourth year photo's, and whoo-ee! Lotta impurities there, it must be said." Harry could feel his opportunity slipping like the noose around his neck would do, and his non-wand hand began scrabbling at the family crest. Luck don't fail me now . . .
Lucius rolled his eyes, and said, "Droll remarks like that shall simply get you into more trouble, Mr Potter. You really should learn to curb your impudence." With as much energy as a man his age could gather, Lucius angled the tip of his wand straight at Harry's face - there! There it was - a loose engraving, which turned a little to the left it would seem. His hands settling on it, Harry replied.
"Yeah, well - " Quickly, Harry turned the crest, and felt his body begin to pull through space, " - it's served me well so far!" The last he saw of the two Malfoy men was their smug expressions morphing into those of absolute surprise, and he grinned at them.
For once he wouldn't mind having a direct link to Tom's torture sessions.
(Scene Break)
The clunk of heavy leather against worn wood as Harry flung down the tome, and a slight click as he turned on the light-bulb which served as his reading lamp. The wooden chair scraped against the wood of the shack floor, and Harry could hear the creak as he sat down. Sighing heavily, he closed his eyes and massaged the bridge of his nose. Opening them a moment later, he blinked quite a few times - and then finally his gaze settled on the book.
His hands trembling slightly, Harry ran his palms over the old leather, feeling the breaks and tears of age, reassuring him that this was it - this was the book that'd been mentioned in Dumbledore's journal, it had to be.
After all, how many books were authored by Terry J Proah?
And how many of them were called, "A Stitch In Time: The How's and What's of Time Travel"?
Just this one, his mind told him, and he had to agree.
(Chapter 1 - End)
Ambrose: I think that's a pretty solid first chapter, don't you think, Professor?
The Professor: Yes, I think we did quite a good job on that. But enough self-congratulation!
Ambrose: See ya next chapter guys! Read and review! Feedback is appreciated - very much!