Dislaimer: I think no one on this site owns anything. I don't own Fruits Basket or The Scientist by Coldplay.
-o-o-
Come up to meet you,
Tell you I'm sorry,
You don't know how lovely you are.
I had to find you,
Tell you I need you,
Tell you I set you apart.
-o-o-
I remember that night during Golden Week when I had laughed for the first time in years. If only that very moment had played out correctly. Maybe I would be the one she was smiling at, instead of him. They were unaware of my stare as they laughed jovially together. I stood behind the wall and at the base of the stair case watching their very action. Whenever they paused the conversation and looked longing into the others eyes, my hands balled up into fists. It wasn't really fair; I loved her first. However, I never really had a chance; She loved the cat of the zodiac. Not some filthy, lying, disgusting creature like myself. I stared at the two of them for the longest time, before turning my head harshly away from the scene being played before me. I must have unconsciously dropped something during that moment because she called out into the hallway.
"Shigure? Yuki? Is something wrong? I heard a crashing sound," When I said nothing in response to the worried question, she had taken the matter into her own hands. She whispered something to him and I heard a pecking sound. I bent down hurriedly to the object I had dropped, to appear as if I had been trying to retrieve it. I heard her footsteps as she walked into the hallway. She saw my bent over figure, which had blocked the view of my face.
"Yuki is something the matter?" She asked timidly and that was when I placed back my mask. Craning my head over my shoulder, I responded to her:
"Oh, nothing's wrong Miss Honda," I said and showed her the bag that had fallen," I accidentally dropped this a bit too loudly when I was going up the stairs. With a relieved smile, she made a movement to return back into the living area.
"Yuki, dinner will be started soon, so if you are heading to the base you'd better hurry!" I smiled at her before making my way up the stairs. I made it about halfway before stopping and sitting on a single step.
...She had called it 'The Base'
...She was right in a way. It was no longer our secret base, for she was no longer mine
...She had never been mine in the first place
...and we were never together...
-o-o-
Tell me your secrets,
And ask me your questions,
Oh let's go back to the start.
Runnin' in circles,
Comin' up tails,
Heads on a science apart.
-o-o-
I had been visiting my base less, I noticed. Whether it had been the fact that I was swamped with work, or that I hadn't had the nerve to visit this place after weeks of no care. Every plant was either withering or already dead. All for one plant, the small lobelia carnation on the far side of the garden. I had forgotten when I had planted that, but it was strange that this flower had survived the cold temperature. I caressed it's small petals, taking in the flower's coloring. I was unaware of the time passing by so quickly, and the next time I had looked up, the sky was already a dark violet color. I sighed and gently retrieved my gardening supplies that were hidden by a large rock. Finding a small pot, and a shovel, I performed my work in the dark.
When I had finished, the end result was a small flower inside of a beige pot. This time, the moon had taken its position high in the sky above me. It's subtle glow touched each petal of the flower. Gently, I carried the flower with me back to the house, while it basked in the moonlight. As I moved closer to the home, I saw that her window was wide open. I could almost smell the scent of her. To me, she smelled sweet, like a strawberry perfume. I entered the home as quietly as possible, and removed my shoes. I hadn't worn a jacket, so I didn't see need to put something in the closet to the left of me. I continued through the hallway, until I reached the stairs. I had moved up the stairs slowly and stopped in front of her door. I placed the pot at the foot of the door along with a note I had written beforehand.
This was the least I could give her...
-o-o-
Nobody said it was easy,
It's such a shame for us to part.
Nobody said it was easy,
No one ever said it would be this hard.
Oh take me back to the start.
-o-o-
"Hatori, don't you think that something is wrong with Yuki?"
"Well, I wouldn't know entirely. What do you mean by wrong?" There was a sigh.
"Just wrong. There's something off about that boy," Puffing out a ring of smoke, Hatori answered the man sitting next to him.
"If you are so worried about him, I'll make him come to the main estate for a look over," Shigure shrugged before speaking again.
"I'm more worried about his mental state at the moment Hatori," The doctor looked at the man before Shigure continued, "He's been distancing himself again. I haven't even seen him for more than five minutes during the past week,"
"I'll come over soon. If something happens to him under your supervision, you'll be responsible," Hatori said as he got up from his sitting position. When he got into his car, he witnessed the cursed dog wave happily to him. As he drove away, he heard two voices speaking in the distance. He was unable to make out any words, but swore the only word he was able to hear said 'Yuki'.
-o-o-
I was just guessin',
At numbers and figures,
Pullin' the puzzles apart.
Questions of science,
Science and progress,
Do not speak as loud as my heart.
-o-o-
I never really saw much of the other inhabitants of my home recently. I did it purposely of course, but apparently no one paid much attention to me. Tohru had been too with Kyo and even that perverted dog worked on his so called novels. Currently I was locked up in my room, staring at the pile of paper in front of me. Taking out a pen from its holder on my desk, I started the tedious work. A few hours had passed without any interruption from my housemates, and my mind had begun to wander to a few weeks ago. When I had finally woken up the next day, the plant was still there along with the note. I had taken the plant into my room and placed it on the windowsill. It's health had been decreasing, I noted. It's petals were falling off one by one, and the whole stem had been wilting the side.
"Yuki? I set aside a plate for you if you wanted to eat later," He heard her say that every night for the past three weeks. He hadn't eaten dinner with the group and none of the plates she had set aside were eaten. She was worried for sure, but was still too busy with Kyo to really pay attention. Every night after each person had gone to rest, he would go down the stairs and dispose of the night's dinner. When he had returned up to his room, he would remain awake for the next few hours only sleeping when he could hear the voice of birds outside.
Every time I would dream of the same thing: My rival smiling at her, while she stared lovingly at him. And where was I you ask? Stuck in cage, ten feet away from them. No matter how much I screamed at them to try to get them to notice me as they disappeared, they never heard me. And every morning when I had awoken from that dreadful nightmare, the two of them had already been gone. It was the same dream this time, but I had woken up in the middle of it, just in time to see the two of them walking together from my window.
"I love you Kyo," She had said lovingly to him as the two of them held hands. For the longest time, he didn't reply.
"-I guess I love you too," Hearing both of them hear their confessions made me angry for some reason. It felt as if there was a bitter, deadly poison aching to come up from my throat, choking me. A pain jutted from my chest and it was hard for me to breathe. I didn't even try to reach for my inhaler this time, and only described my heart.
Broken into a million tiny pieces, with shards that jabbed my every being. Each shattered piece now held a label. Hurting, depression, despair, agony, sorrow, heartache...
-o-o-
Tell me you love me,
Come back and haunt me,
Oh, what a rush to the start.
Runnin' in circles,
Chasin' our tails,
Comin' back as we are.
-o-o-
I didn't go to school that day, and no one seemed to care. When I had awoken from my asthma attack, I found myself on the floor and a broken flower pot next to me. Gathering up my strength I pushed myself to a sitting position. My window was still open, and it was still around mid day. I threw out the pot's shards out of the window with the flower still with it. Ileft the note on my desk and jumped out of the window, landing with grace.
I won't be a burden to you anymore...
...Tohru...
-o-o-
Nobody said it was easy,
Oh it's such a shame for us to part.
-o-o-
There was a figure atop the large cliff. The person looked down and took one step, before falling. This person was falling forever, that is until there was a loud crash. Everything was quiet for a moment, until the chirping of birds had disrupted that. And to that one person, there was no more pain. No more suffering.
Just nothing...
-o-o-
Nobody said it was easy,
-o-o-
Dear Tohru,
I apologize if you're reading this and the unenviable has already happened, but I want you to keep this letter private. By the time you actually read this letter, you will probably be crying at the news that has been brought upon you. I apologize for loving you so much, and that you are hurting. Please, don't blame yourself for my actions. It was never your fault. It was mine, and I only chose this option because I couldn't stop loving you. I understand if you are crying, but your beautiful face shouldn't be marked by tears, but with smiles instead. I want to thank you for accepting me for the weak person I am. Thank you for being there. Thank you for your kindness even when I did nothing for you in return. Just this once I ask for you to do something for me. I want you to be happy and enjoy your life while you can. I love you so much, that it would hurt if you remained sad your entire life.
With love,
Yuki.
-o-o-
Nobody said it was easy,
No one ever said it would be so hard.
I'm goin' back to the start.
-o-o-
IT WAS SO DEPRESSING I SWEAR. Welp. This fanfiction has been floating around in my head for the longest time. I've noticed that there has been a severe lack of Yuki-centric fics lately, but I've decided to change that. Yuki was pretty OOC near the end, but that was expected wasn't it? ^^" It's my first time writing a song-fic; To my readers of OTTRIAH: I guess this is the reason I haven't updated yet. MY BAD. I was distracted by this.