Evžen hurriedly walked into the bathroom of his school. He made his way over to the sinks and placed his hands on one of them. He gripped the edges until his knuckles turned white and he had to blink away forming tears. He hesitantly looked up at himself in the mirror. He saw the shock and pain written all over his face. Evžen shook his head and looked back down, staring intently at the sink while his dark brown hair fell over his normally bright amber eyes. He took a shaky breath and felt a tear slip down his face. "Damn it." He whispered as he wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his sweater.
"Hey" Someone behind him placed a soft hand on his shoulder. "You okay?"
Evžen wiped around and found himself face to face with the last person he wanted to see; blond haired and brown eyed Luki. Evžen gave him a fake smile, hoping that he wouldn't see through it. "I'm perfectly fine."
Luki raised an eyebrow and used his thumb to wipe away a lingering tear. "Bull" He held out his wet thumb for Evžen to see. "What's this?"
"My contacts are just, uh, infected, yeah." Evžen quickly said.
"You don't even wear contacts." Luki pointed out. "Stop lying and tell me what's wrong."
Evžen swallowed and opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but closed it again.
Luki place both of his hands on Evžen face and moved his head back and forth. "I'll get it out of you." He said still moving Evžen's head. "You are going to tell me."
Evžen took Luki's hands off his face. "I-"
"Hey dude, how's your brother? I heard about what happened." A blond haired guy in glasses asked as he walked in, noticing Evžen.
"I, uh, I-I…" Evžen stammered, unable to talk.
The guy slapped his back. "I'm sure he'll be fine." He said grinning.
"Alfred please, leave. I'm dealing with something here." Luki said, slightly annoyed at being ignored.
Alfred pursed his lips together. "I was just asking." Luki glared. "Fine, fine, I'll go." Alfred said holding his hands up in defeat. "Oh just one more thing, Evžen, Elizaveta wanted to talk to you."
Evžen nodded slowly. "I-I know…" He whispered.
"Well see ya dude." Alfred said as he walked out.
Luki turned to Evžen. "Why does my sister need to talk to you?" He asked.
"B-b-because she needed to t-tell me something." Evžen stammered as he wiped his eyes again.
"Tell you what?"
Evžen closed his eyes, fighting to keep back tears. "I-I." He paused and took a breath. "It doesn't matter, I already knew… I was told before her…"
"Told what? Luki asked.
Evžen merely shook his head, not saying anything.
Luki grabbed Evžen's hand. "Ev please, just tell me. I want to know what's got you so upset."
Evžen felt another tear slip down his cheek. "Damn it." He whispered, wiping at his eyes again.
"Ev…" Luki pressed. "Please."
Evžen took a shaky breath. "I-I, Roderich, he, uh, I, and, he d-" Evžen stopped himself, as if saying it aloud would make it true.
"Ev, everyone knows about the car crash, you're fine." Luki reassured him.
Evžen shook his head. "No, I-I'm not okay… How am I going to talk to your sister? How can I face her?" He blurted.
"No one blames you Evžen." Luki whispered.
Evžen gave up and let himself cry as he sank to the ground. "No… He, and, uh, I, I mean, they must've been lying… they must've been…" He said in between sobs.
Luki sat down next to him, unsure of what to do. "Evžen, I don't understand… what's wrong? Who has to be lying?"
Evžen latched on to Luki, hugging him as he cried. "Roderich, th-they told me… They told m-me he d-" Evžen stopped himself again, unable to say it.
"They told you what?" Luki said softly as he put an arm around his crying friend.
Evžen pulled away from Luki and looked away, staring at the wall. "They said he d-died." Evžen whispered barely loud enough for Luki to hear.
Luki didn't respond, instead he just sat there, unable to speak as Evžen let out another sob.
Evžen turned back to Luki. "If-if I had stopped sooner, if-if we had waited a few minutes, I-I, he-he wouldn't have-" Evžen was cut off by Luki pressing his lips softly on his own.
"Its not your fault." He whispered pulling Evžen into a hug. "Don't you go thinking that."
"But it is… I could've done something… I could've let him drive…" Evžen whispered.
"Then this would be you. You'd be gone." Luki pointed out. "It was the truck's fault, that dunk driver. Not. Yours."
"It isn't fair…" Evžen sobbed. "What about your sister? What is she going to say, do?"
"She'll do the same thing you are. You both loved him, even if you swore up and down that you didn't." Luki said softly into Evžen's hair.
"But-"
"I don't want to hear it Evžen. You. Are. Not. At. Fault." Luki said as he pulled him back so that he could see his face.
"But I am…" Evžen whispered.
"Ev, come on, you know you aren't." Luki said, trying a different approach. "Blame that drunk driver if anyone. It's his fault he ran that red light, it's his fault that Roderich isn't here anymore. We're lucky that you came out without being hurt at all."
"But-"
"No buts. You're here and right now, that is important." Luki gave him a week smile. "Think if it had been both of you? What then?"
"Then I, uh, I don't know…" Evžen muttered.
"Then you'd have even more people blaming their selves. Including myself, I feel bad, but when I found out you were okay I had let out a breath that I didn't know I had been holding. I still feel bad that I was slightly okay with your brother being hurt and not you. Thinking of my sister, I felt, and feel, like a jerk." Luki explained.
"I-"
Luki chuckled. "Yeah I know, I said goodbye ages ago right? Why should I care?" he sighed. "Look this isn't the time, we need to go find my sister." Luki stood up and offered his hand for Evžen to take. "You think you can manage that?"
Evžen nodded and took Luki's hand. "Can I wash my face first?" He asked as Luki pulled him up.
"Of course."
X~X~X~X~X
Evžen held onto Luki's hand as they stood for the funeral. It wasn't a dream, it was real, Roderich was gone and was never coming back. He would never yell at Evžen to put on his glasses again, never comment on how well his violin playing was coming along, never bother him about wanting them to play together, piano and violin. Evžen felt tears fall down his face as he remembered when he was only a kid, when his grandmother had died, when Roderich and held him close and let him cry his eyes out getting snot and tears all over his brother's shirt. Evžen pushed up his glasses and wiped away some of the tears. He had worn his glasses, as much as he hated them, today, for his brother.
"Hey" Luki whispered. "You need a tissue?'
Evžen shook his head and looked down at his feet. "I'm fine." He whispered back.
Luki looked at Evžen with worry written all over his face, but he didn't say anything and put his free hand in his pocket.
"Hey guys." A whisper from next to Luki said. "I was thinking that after this we, you know, go out and eat or something…"
Luki turned his head to the person standing next to him. "Elizaveta…" He whispered. She just wants to make things normal again… he thought. "Sure I guess." He turned to Evžen and whispered in his ear. "How about some food later?"
Evžen shook his head. "I-I'm good, thanks." He responded in a low whisper. "I don't thin I can eat…"
"Ev…" Luki whispered softly, not knowing what to do.
Elizaveta quietly walked around her brother and gave Evžen a hug. "I get it." She whispered. "I understand." She pulled back and looked at Evžen, sad green eyes meeting even sadder amber ones. "I know what you're thinking. I don't, no one, blames you." She gave him a sad smile. "So stop beating yourself up, okay?"
Evžen nodded. "I-I'll try…" He whispered.
Hungary ruffled his hair and walked back to her spot next to Luki.
Evžen stared blankly ahead, ignoring the fact that Hungary had done something he hated people doing. He noticed Alfred standing next to Arthur and Francis. He could also see Gilbert and Ludwing, heads bent together, clearly talking. Then standing next to them was Feliciano and Lovino, Feliciano was crying and Lovnio was trying to get him to calm down. Evžen blinked pushing back more tears. Did they really know his brother? Did they ever see his softer sides? The ones he only showed when Evžen was truly upset. Evžen shook his head and sighed. Of course they didn't really know him, if fact Evžen was sure he didn't even really know his own brother.
'Hey, Ev, we have to go up now." Luki said as he pulled Evžen along, still holding his hand.
Evžen watched as Elizaveta put a hand full of dirt on top of the grave, he watched as Luki did the same, but when it was his turn he just stood there, unsure of what to do. He took a shaky breath and let the dirt slowly fall through his hand.
"Goodbye, big brother." He whispered to himself so that no one could hear.
Shot me in the brain please. I can believe I wrote that...
Okay so this is some messed up AU I came up with. DO NOT ASK ME WHY. (I couldn't answer you)
So yeah Czech (Evžen) and Austria had gotten into a very bad car crash. Czech came out unscathed while Austria had to be sent to the hospital with life threatening wounds.
I do not want the Austria fans going 'Ugh, how dare you kill Austria like that?! I hate you and your stupid story.'. Please don't do that. I meant it as justan AU story. I wanted Czech to be upset about something and poof Austria died.
Luki is my OC for Slovakia.
So yeah, I kind of want to burn up said AU, because its too sad.
I suppose I hope you guys like it...? As much as one can like a incredibly sad Fic...
Austria and Hungary belong to Hetalia
Czech, Slovakia, and the story belong to Me