Me, You and Nii-san (sequel to foolish little brother)
Sasuke could not help it, he was distracted and due to it his standards of missions were slipping as well as the fact he seemed even more bastard-ish than usual. The problem? His older brother and his blond bombshell of a boyfriend
"Fine, we can have a threesome but only if Sasuke agrees." Itachi said giving in, Deidara cheered.
"Well, un?" Deidara asked Sasuke who was in the doorway with a horror filled expression on his face.
"Sasuke-kun~ Kakashi sensei had arrived ages ago." The annoying pink bitch's whiny voice filled his eardrums making him want to rip them out just so he did not have to listen to her wails. He looked up and blinked, sure enough Kakashi sensei was standing there looking amused as he looked at him. Naruto was looking at him as well but he was just confused.
"You were just staring at the wall with a blush on your cheeks for ten minutes -dattebayo!" Naruto said, Sasuke felt his cheeks flush brighter red. Kakashi smirked under his mask, he had been a teenager not that long ago and knew what that blush meant.
"Naruto, Sakura walk ahead, I need to talk to Sasuke for a moment." Kakashi said, they nodded blankly and got ten steps away before they got into a fight and Sakura was chasing poor Naruto looking like the demon witch she was.
"So... I see something's on your mind? Care to share?" Kakashi asked Sasuke, bending down to Sasuke's height holding his book in front of his face as he peered over it. Sasuke coughed and went redder.
"Umm... Sensei?" Sasuke began embarrassedly.
"Yesss?" Kakashi asked interested.
"What's a threesome like?" Sasuke blurted out, he had no idea how to handle questions like these. Kakashi's eyebrow raised and his grin grew larger.
"Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke, let me introduce you to the world of Icha Icha. The answers to all your questions." Kakashi said slinging his arm around the Uchiha's shoulder and leading him away completely forgetting about their training and the two other members of Team 7.
X
Sasuke stared in amazing at the book as he read it, was this really what a threesome was like? It sounded amazing for instance one line read his moans of pure ecstasy louden as the girl carefully danced her fingertips across his skin, lower and lower down his chest as the other girl was occupied with his mouth. He found himself getting a nosebleed as he read more of the amazing book, no wonder Kakashi was reading this all the time! Speaking of Kakashi, he was staring at his most emotionless student, proud to have the love of his life (porn) bring a blush and a small smile onto his face.
"That was amazing, sensei, thank so much, I have to finish some business now." Sasuke said putting the book down, Kakashi smiled.
"Feel free to borrow my novels anytime you want Sasuke." Kakashi said giving him a knowing smirk. Sasuke blushed and walked quickly (Uchihas never ran, it was unsosithicated) out of his sensei's house.
X
Kisame was walking calmly through the Akatsuki's forest when a black blur ran into him, causing both of them to crash to the floor. He said rather foul curses he had learnt from Hidan and rubbed his now sore head. He looked across to see Itachi's little brother Sasuke rubbing his equally sore head as well. Kisame growled and pulled out Samehada, no way that brat was killing Itachi on his watch!
"You! You're not getting close enough to lay a finger on my partner!" Kisame shouted, Sasuke groaned, he came here to have a threesome and he had to get into a fight.
"I'm not going to hurt him, I just want to talk about his offer." Sasuke murmured, Kisame raised an eyebrow. Offer? What offer was this, Itachi had been out of his sight until today well except for that party where he had passed out onto the floor and Hidan had bragged about letting a duck-butt in. Realization hit him when he looked at Sasuke's hair, what was the stupid immortal thinking letting Itachi's sworn enemy in! But seeing as Itachi had not been injured and Sasuke was standing an offer may have happened. After all Itachi would of told him if his brother had come unless they had some sort of secret offer.
"We'll go ask him about this offer, but you better not try anything stupid." Kisame hissed, Sasuke stared surprised, he expected the shark just to chase him away not believing a word.
X
Itachi raised an eyebrow as Kisame walked into the Akatsuki living room where Deidara and Hidan also sat. He occupinied by his younger brother who was looking nervously around.
"Care to explain why brought me Sasuke?" Itachi asked, Kisame smirked.
"He said something about an offer..." Kisame said, Deidara spat out his drink all over Hidan at this and began choking. Itachi ignored him.
"Oh yes..." He glared at the choking Deidara "That offer..."
"Oh Itachi! Why didn't you tell me about this offer!" Kisame whined, "I thought I was your best friend!" Kisame continued, Itachi winced. Sasuke suddenly felt sympathy for his brother, Kisame was kind of like Sakura but taller, bluer, deeper pitched and with a smaller forehead.
"Well if you don't mind, I'll go discuss this offer with Sasuke in my room." Itachi said standing up, Kisame grabbed hold of Itachi's arm.
"But Itachi, you can't go on your own what if he tries any funny business!" Kisame whined, Itachi managed to stay composed.
"Fine, Deidara, you come too." Itachi said, Deidara stood up.
"But Itachi! I can do that easily!" Kisame whined, Hidan nodded.
"Yeh, why chose Blond bitch, he hates your guts almost as much as Duck-butt does." Hidan spoke up.
"Exactly, he hates me so he'll make sure Sasuke doesn't kill me just so he can kill me himself." Itachi said, Kisame blinked.
"That does make sense in a twisted kind of way." Kisame murmured, Itachi dragged them both into his bedroom and locked the door behind them.
"So, Sasuke, do you want a threesome then, un?" Deidara asked embarrassedly going red as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
"Well, I-I... yes." Sasuke murmured in a small voice, his face as red as his guilty pleasure (tomatoes).
"What changed your mind?" Itachi asked curiously, sitting on his bed comfortably.
"Icha Icha..." Sasuke admitted, the two elders looked at eachother.
"Isn't that a bit old for you?" Itachi queried "Deidara is even too young to read it."
"Shut up Itachi, un!" Deidara scowled, he smiled turning to Sasuke "Threesomes are a lot better than Icha Icha writes, Sasuke, you can only get so much pleasure from reading." Deidara smirked, Sasuke went redder.
"Are you a virgin?" Itachi asked bluntly, Sasuke nodded embarrassedly.
"I'll be really gentle, un, if you decide you don't what to continue, just tell me and I'll stop." Deidara said softly, Sasuke just looked at the ground. His eyes widen as a pair of soft lips captured his own. He tensed before relaxing and leaning into the kiss. Itachi bit his lip as he watched his love kiss his younger brother gently, he felt a mixture of jealousy and older brother protective instinct at that conflicted with eachother. Sasuke opened his eye, he had not realised he had shut them until then when the blond pulled away.
"Are you ready to go further?" Deidara asked concerned, Sasuke nodded. Itachi smiled, Deidara was being so considerate that it put his protective instinct at ease. But it didn't stop the jealousy. Deidara captured Sasuke's lips again and cautiously licked his bottom lip making Sasuke gasp in surprise. Deidara's tongue darted into his parted mouth taking the oppintunity. Itachi bit his lip, Deidara being so SEME was a big turn on for him. It made him annoyed he was not the one Deidara's attention was on. Meanwhile Deidara's slick muscle flicked Sasuke's own making it shyly rise up. Deidara smiled and slid his tongue around Sasuke's moist cavern exploring every inch of his mouth, Sasuke's eyes widened a the new pleasant feeling but soon his Uchiha pride kicked in and he fought for dominance. Deidara smirked and pinned his tongue down and explored further in his mouth making Sasuke moan loudly. Itachi's eyes widened, this was unbelievable arousing, who knew watching your little brother moan could get you semi-hard? Damn it, he needed to touch the blond. He slid his arms around the blond's slender waist, making Deidara smile at him lovingly before moaning into Sasuke's mouth as Itachi began to suck on his neck. Sasuke seprated panting for breath, Itachi resisted to glare at his brother and took Deidara's now empty mouth for his own. Deidara's eyes widened before he smirked having felt something hanrd rub against him.
"Hard much?" Deidara laughed as Sasuke recovered from the makeout session, Sasuke stood awkwardly looking at them.
"Ita-kun~ we can't forget about Sas~ah..." Deidara began but as Itachi removed his mouth from his and began working on his neck he trailed off into a moan. Sasuke found a nosebleed forming and his trousers were getting uncomfortablely tight. As he shifted the fabric rubbed his erection and he bit his lip embarrassedly as he let out a quiet moan. Deidara's and Itachi's attention turned onto hi, Deidara smiling.
"You take back, I'll take front." Deidara winked at Itachi, Itachi sighed and looked awkwardly at his younger brother. Sasuke smiled awkwardly back feeling like a little kid again. He gasped as Itachi slid his arms around his waist and began nibbling on his ear, Deidara took the given oppunity and slid his tounge into Sasuke's mouth. Sasuke's tounge burst into life and fought valiantly against Deidara's battered tounge which had to fight Itaci's moments before. Deidara wielded, his eyes drooping from tiredness. As Itachi licked his ear lobe, Sasuke moaned deeply into Deidara's mouth. Deidara soon felt his lungs begin to burn, he had barely recovered from the two makeout sessions beforehand. Deidara pushed away weakly panting, his hand mouths wheezing urgently to get his breathing back to normal as quickly as possible. Sasuke smirked over the fact that he had won that battle, Deidara saw this and frowned. He began to work on his neck, ignoring the mingled salvia of Itachi and Sasuke on his chin. Sasuke gasped and moaned as Deidara reached a sensitive spot (the same spot where the curse mark would be) Deidara nipped softly on the spot before circling his tounge over it making Sasuke shudder. Itachi was working down from his ear and past the back of the neck to the shoulder blades (just visible above the shirt) as Deidara was doing so. Deidara left the now pronounced lovemark and trailed down to the top of Sasuke's shirt. His ngers faltered near te bottom of the shirt, he looked nervously at Sasuke and Itachi.
"Off?" He asked cautiousl, Sasuke nodded and Itachi detatched himself from his brother and helped Deidara to lift off the shirt over Sasuke's head. Sasuke shivered from the sudden cold, Itachi quickly reattatched himsef back to Sasuke's back and Deidara did the same to the front. They mirrored eachother as they made a trail of lovemarks down his back and chest. Sasuke moaned loudly, Deidara made his way to thperk nipples and twisted them in his mouth. Itachi, having decided he had enough of Sasuke's cinnamony taste, made his way to Deidara and nibbled on Deidara's neck longingly. He closed his eyes in pleasure as he tasted his love's sweet chocolately banana taste.
" I want to be inside you." Itachi murmured lustily, his eyes half-lidded, Deidara blushed a beautiful scarlet.
"I-I-Itachi..." Deidara murmured, Itachi began biting on Deidara's neck, Deidara moaned and tried desperately to keep his attention on Sasuke but failed and could barely think straight due to what Itachi was doing to his neck.
"Now I think its hardly fair that Sasuke is the only one shirtless." Itachi purred, Deidara blushed and Itachi slid Deidara's shirt off before pulling off his own.
X
Pein had called a meeting, they were now waiting for Deidara an Itachi who had both not been seen since they left with Sasuke. Then all the assembled members heard it. There was a loud thud as someone was hit against the wall then...
"Watch where your putting those filthy hands!" A voice cried out in a mixture of a pained/pleasured groan.
"Shall I show you how filthy these hands can be~" Deidara's voice purred seductively, Sasori bit his lip, what the hell was his partner doing.
Loud moans filled the room. Pein coughed awkwardly, whilst the other members either began snickering, choking on nothing or becoming very blank.
"Oh God~ harder, un." Deidara's voice screamed out in pleasure. Hidan scowled and banged against the wall.
"It's Jashin! For Jashin's sake!" Hidan yelled, there was a silence until...
"Sorr~AH! Hidan." Deidara replied, Hidan smiled triumphantly as Deidara then screamed "Oh fucking Jashin, yes, un, there!" Tobi scowled, there was a slightly higher-pitched scream.
"For goodness sake, Itachi, don't forget *murmur murmur*!" Deidara shouted,
"Gomen, koi." Itachis voice rang out, everyone froze. Koi? Kisame paled. His darling Itachi was with Deidara, he burst into tears. Everyone froze, Itachi was there too? Didn't that mean that there was three people... there was even louder moans from then on, three moans at once at one point. Konan ran out the room wielding a video camera.
"Go... Jashin you're so fucking tight, un." Deidara murmured.
"FASTER!" The unrecongnized voice yelled, everyone blinked. Who did that belong to? Screams of pleasure echoed around the meeting room.
"Is it wrong to be turned on?" Hidan asked bluntly, everyone turned and stared at him. Kakuzu face palmed, why was he stuck with the loud mouthed idiot? "Hey Kakuzu, do you want to get a room?" Hidan purred into his ear very quietly, Kakuzu went red. Then he shrugged, why not? After all Hidan was very attractive and the noise those three were making would drown them out. They both stood up and left.
x
Sasuke hobbled into Konoha, Deidara had been kind enough to escort outside the gates despite the fact his ass probally hurt more than his did. Who knew Itachi could pound that hard? He was currently making his way to his house when the stupid pink bitch popped up and screamed at him.
"WHO THE HELL GAVE YOU THAT HICKEY!" She screamed pointed to his neck, Sasuke groaned, he'll have to start wearing higher-collared shirts.
"I have no idea what you're talking about, that is just a bruise from training." Sasuke lied smoothly. Kakashi and Naruto hearing the screams of Sakura, ran up.
"What's wrong?" Kakashi asked cooly, Sakura pointed to Sasuke's neck shakingly. Kakashi seeing the hickey smirked, so his student did as he thought he would. Due to his amazing eyesight and taller height than Sakura he could see more hickeys littering Sasuke's neck just below his high-collared shirt. He smirked, Sasuke had gotten very lucky then.
"Can I go back to my house, sensei? I don't feel like training." Sasuke said, Kakashi nodded and noticed in amusement as Sasuke limped. So he swung that way. He have to show him some of his yaoi collection then.