The Christmas Dream

(Season 20)

I don't own em, and I don't claim to. I just like to play with em. I'll put em back in the same shape I took em out, I promise. And in case, you're worried, no, I ain't getting paid for this either.

AN: I have limited access to a computer right now, so I won't be able to respond to PM's or send any of my own. I promise to read any and all reviews, but I won't be able to reply.

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Kitty Russell leaned wearily against the polished bar top and looked around at the ragged cowboys and fancily dressed gamblers that made up her clientele for the night. Though just 2 days from Christmas, it hardly seemed so. The weather had turned cold, as it was want to do this time of year, and the calendar had flipped over each day, marking another 24 hours closer to December 25th, but it still didn't feel right.

It wasn't because it hadn't snowed. It wasn't always a guarantee that they'd have a white Christmas. And it wasn't because Matt wasn't back yet from Hays. He'd missed more than one holiday in the past and she didn't think he was hurt or that anything was wrong with him. She had a pretty good sixth sense, when it came to that cowboy, and she was pretty sure she'd know if he was in danger or something. No, it wasn't Matt.

But it was certainly something.

With a deep sigh, she straightened up and looked over at Sam. "Sam, I'm going back into my office for a while. Call you me if you need me."

"Yes, Ma'am." He smiled.

Returning the smile, Kitty wandered back to her office and sat down heavily at her desk. Though her books were almost always in order, she decided maybe working on them would take her mind off the upcoming holiday and whatever it was that was making it less than cheerful.

Hours later, she sat back in her chair and stretched, she'd worked her books to a fare-thee-well and there was nothing more she could accomplish in her office. Looking up at the clock on the top of her roll-top desk, she saw it was just past 10. She'd heard nothing, coming from the front of the saloon, so she supposed it was a quiet night. Might as well close up.

Walking out in the bar room, however, Kitty could tell that Sam had already closed up. The room was empty of patrons and employees alike, the floor was swept and the chairs up on the tables. "Hmmm." She mumbled. "Maybe I was back there longer than I thought. I wonder why Sam didn't tell me."

Shaking her head at the incongruity of it, she took the one lone lamp, that Sam had left lit for her, and slowly climbed the stairs.

Sighing as she climbed, she thought about her position here. She'd been in Dodge for nigh onto twenty years now. She'd been kidnapped, beaten and worse and still it hadn't driven her away. Despite all of the bad, and there had surely been a lot of that, there'd also been a lot of good.

Matt, her business, her friends like Doc, Sam, Festus and Newly. They were treasures she'd not have; if she'd left Dodge like she'd planned to that first day, and had tried to, several times since.

Still, even with all the good, there was an emptiness inside of her, that no business or friend or even Matt could fill. And as long as Matt continued as Marshal, she knew it would always be that way.

When she finally obtained the second floor, Kitty started towards her door when she heard it. Stopping in her tracks, she looked around, certain she'd been mistaken. But a second later, there it was again. A baby's cry. And the cry was coming from her room.

A frown creased her forehead as she walked up to her door, pausing at the threshold. There it was again and this time it was followed by the deep voice of Matt Dillon. "Hush, little one." He said in a soft gentle voice she'd only heard him use a few times. "It's alright. She'll be here in just a minute."

Opening the door, Kitty walked into a room she didn't recognize and yet she knew it was hers. Matt was sitting in a rocking chair, a small pink wrapped bundle against his shoulder. He was patting it gently on the back as he rocked slowly forth and back.

A smile graced his features when he saw her enter. "Glad you're here. Our little girl seems to have an upset stomach and I can't get her to quiet down. You're usually the only one she'll respond to."

Kitty looked at him with nothing less than total confusion. "Our little girl?"

Matt chuckled as he stood and handed the baby to her. "I guess I should've said, 'you're' little girl. She definitely likes you more than me, when she's not feeling well." Grabbing his hat, Matt quickly stepped to the door and opened it. "I've got to make my rounds. I'll be back in a little bit. See ya later, Kitty." He said as he left, closing the door firmly behind him.

For several seconds, Kitty was too stunned to do more than cradle the baby against her chest and rock it, crooning a soft lullaby into her ear until the infant settled down and went to sleep. "What the…?" She finally muttered.

Sitting down in the now empty rocker, she looked down at the sleeping child in her arms. The little one was a perfect combination of both her and Matt in features and hair. A fierce love overtook her soul as Kitty gazed at the child. Though dimly aware that this might be a dream, she also was aware that it was a dream she didn't want to wake from. Not if it meant she could keep this baby.

Her baby.

Her's and Matt's.

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Out on the prairie, Matt settled himself by the fire he'd built and pulled his coat tighter. No stranger to camping outside, in even the harshest of weather, he was finding it harder and harder to deal with.

His right leg, which had been injured several times, in one way or another over the years, seemed to ache even more now when winter came. As did his shoulder and his back. Each night on the cold hard ground, it was almost impossible to get much rest and the next morning even more difficult to pull himself from his blankets and get started.

But this was the life he'd chosen, wasn't it? He'd wanted to be a lawman. And by his, and everyone else's, estimation, he'd been a damn good one. But in his estimation alone, that's all that he was.

Shaking his head ruefully at that thought, he reached into his pocket and pulled out the small box he'd hidden there. Opening it up, he gazed down at the broach he'd bought Kitty for Christmas. Though simple in its design, it was rich in showing his feelings for her. Or at least he hoped it was, because telling her was, by far, more difficult.

Sighing, he closed the box and put it back into his pocket, and settled himself back against his saddle. He knew he wouldn't really sleep but he hoped for a little rest. He had to ride to Garden City tomorrow and then to Spearville. It was doubtful that he'd make it back to Dodge in time for Christmas.

But he didn't achieve the rest as a couple of hours later; he sat up with a start.

Rubbing his face with a shaky hand, he looked around him when the realization hit him. He needed to go home. He needed to go back to Dodge and Kitty. He had no idea why, or how, he knew. He just knew, that if he waited, the Christmas gift, he'd bought for Kitty, wouldn't be needed.

Quickly as he could, he got to his feet, put out his meager fire, saddled his horse and quit his camp. Riding hell bent for leather back to Dodge and Kitty.

TBC