Leaving Clarke standing in front of that door was probably the hardest thing Lexa has ever had to do. But she had to believe, they all had to believe that it was over. She needed to get her people out of that mountain safely. The 44 were needed alive, the grounders had no more purpose to serve and would be killed without hesitation. Her heart wouldn't allow her to truly betray the Sky Princess, it barely allowed her to pretend to. There would be nothing stopping her and her army from fighting along the Skaicru once she got her people safely out of the mountain. But for now she was walking behind a very confused and reluctant army.
They didn't want to leave the sky people behind like that. It went against their pride and their honor. The sky people had brought so much to the alliance. If it wasn't for them the grounders would forever be in the shadow of the mountain. Losing their friends and family, being turned into monsters, and being bled dry to save the people that lived in a sinister bliss within the mountain. Not only that, they had all come to respect and some even like the blonde haired, blue eyed spitfire they called Clarke of the Sky. She had shown so much bravery and honor, the likes they had only seen in their Heda. But none of them were willing to go against their commander, so they turned their backs and headed home. She was fighting against her every instinct with every step away from Clarke she took, so when she got a safe distance away she stopped.
"Hod op!" The army halted as if they had come to a brick wall and immediately all eyes were on the commander. "I know all of you are silently questioning my decision to walk away from this war, and our allies. So I'm here to tell you that we will be going back. I need our people who have been in the mountain safely escorted home while the rest of us go back and spill the blood that our people have been owed for years! They don't have any more of our people in that mountain and they won't execute the sky people that they do have. There is nothing else stopping us from taking the mountain. This will be the final fight for some of us tonight, we know that. But as I said earlier, the mountain will fall tonight. Jus drein jus daun! Jus drein jus daun!" Battle cries filled the trees as the able warriors made their way back to the mountain to take a stand beside the sky people once again. Tonight, the mountain would be red.
Clarke was still in a state of defeated shock. She had the most hopelessly empty feeling in her heart. Her people called for her to follow them home, it was over they said, they had lost. "It can't be over." Silently she stood there in front of the door. Not moving, alone. She couldn't leave them. Even if she stood there until she was killed or taken, she just couldn't go home without them. They were her people, her family, and she had let them down with misplaced trust. She had trusted Lexa, even more than that she had cared about her. More than she was ready to truly admit. But now she felt nothing. She couldn't let herself feel anything in that moment. She was afraid if she let herself feel the emotions that she could feel trying to crush her heart and soul she would no longer be able to stay on her feet. She heard a low rumble in the distance behind her. At first she wasn't sure if it wasn't just her wrecked mind playing tricks on her. As it got louder she really started to question her mind state, it was the sound of an army shouting in trigedasleng coming in her direction, but that wasn't possible, they had abandoned her and left her there alone.
"Clarke!" Monroe came running up to her barely able to speak from being so winded. "Clarke they're coming back! We didn't make it very far when we heard them. I turned around as soon as I realized it was them. Our people are going to be fine! We're going to get them out!"
Clarke was hearing the words and trying her hardest to process them but it just didn't make any sense. Lexa had looked her in the face and told her she was sorry, had walked away, left her on her own. Why would they be coming back? Shortly after Monroe the rest of the remaining 100 and arkers were back where they started waiting on some sort of explanation as to what was about to happen and why suddenly the commander was on her way back. When the grounders finally broke the tree line with Heda front and center marching with purpose towards Clarke she was still standing shell shocked. She hadn't even had time to fully process the betrayal yet and now here was Lexa heading right for her.
The first thing the commander did was walk right up to Clarke and look her straight in the eyes and try to use her eyes to convey her every emotion onto the princess. There was so much she wanted to say to her to ease the pain and confusion she was seeing in those beautiful blue eyes, but for now most of it would have to wait. "I am sorrier than I could ever tell you in words that even for a short amount of time I caused you pain Clarke. I would never leave you like that, not after everything you and your people have done for me and for all of us on the ground. I knew that your people are needed alive inside the mountain. I also knew that with no use for my people any longer they were in much more danger. I needed them to let my people go, I needed them to think that we were no longer a threat. I needed you to think so as well. But we're here, we're ready, we're going to win this war and bring OUR people home." Clarke didn't even have words, in a 30 minute time span her poor heart had gone through every kind of emotional trauma there is. She chose to do as the commander had done, tell her everything she needed to tell her with her eyes. She reached out and grabbed one of Lexa's hands and gave it a tight squeeze.
Lexa turned towards her men and started shouting commands that Clarke was barely picking up on. The fact that she was understanding any of it was a good thing, she was finally learning. As the commander and princess led their army right through the now abandoned front door, Indra had already made it back to the tunnels to find Octavia and get inside. The grounders made good on their word, the mountain was painted red that night. They were so caught off guard that the amount of grounder casualties was unbelievably low. However, when Cage and his people brought even more of the sky people into the mountain, including Abby and Raven, Clarke had to make an impossible decision. She had to irradiate level 5. Meaning every citizen of the mountain, man, women, child, burned. It came down to her people, or the people of Mount Weather. She chose. She won.
Clarke was nearly asleep with her head resting on Lexa's back while they rode back to the temporary camp outside of Ton DC. The slow steady pace of the horse along with her exhaustion and the feeling of relief and happiness was putting her into a state of content bliss. Lexa had come back, they had won, all of her people were free and heading home. Some of the weaker 100 were riding in the arms of grounders who had begun to see them as their people too. The only thing keeping Clarke from falling asleep and possibly falling off of the horse was her mind, she couldn't get it to be quiet.
"Please say something Clarke, your thoughts are louder than a Pauna's roar" Lexa said with quiet sigh.
"I don't want to talk, I just want to process this night and get home. I just need to sleep. It's been too much, I just need to shut down for a while" she answered squeezing onto the commander even tighter.
Lexa could hardly blame her, she just needed to know what she was feeling. She needed to know what she was thinking. If all was forgiven. But that would wait. For now she reached back and pulled a very sleepy Clarke around to sit in front of her. Clarke let out a surprised yelp but she complied so she wouldn't end up on her ass under the horses feet for making Lexa lose her grip. Now that she was in the commander's lap she couldn't tear her eyes away. Stormy blue met bright green and neither of them needed to speak, it was understood. They were going to be okay. Clarke laid her head on Lexa's shoulder and buried her face into her neck. Now they would go home. To live, to start over, rebuild their city and their lives. Home to heal from the internal and external wounds the mountain had inflicted on all of them. Home together.
A/N This isn't my first, but it's been a lot of years since I've given writing a shot, so please be forgiving. I am willing to make this into a multi-chapter fic, depending on if anyone thinks it's worth continuing. So thanks for reading and if you have any comments or criticisms or blessed advice you know what to do!