Crushed. Broken. Unsure. Empty. This is all I felt. I didn't know how to breathe anymore, or what to believe. My chest was heavy and I felt weak. Is this what heartbreak felt like? Surely I felt this way when Finn died, but there was a whole knew element to it. This was all new, and I was so over it.
The unanswered questions and flashbacks to earlier today twisted my insides and all I could do was stand in front of the bunker door. All I thought I knew was going to happen, I clearly didn't.
"You can't plan a war, Clarke. Things change all the time." Lexa's voice haunted me.
Emptiness is all I could muster of a feeling. I looked around, and everyone was gone. She was gone and I didn't know what to do anymore. She had a choice, and she made it. She was gone.
"Why did she take that deal?" I whispered to the wind, and anything that could hear around me. "We could have fought together!"
I stared at the door in front of me, angry, and had more flashbacks to the earlier moments. They replayed in my head and I couldn't shut them off.
"May we meet again"
Was she angry that I was unsure about what laid next for her and I? Could she blame me? Was she really that naive? My people were in there. The 44 people that had come to earth with me now were trapped behind a door, and I couldn't save them. My plans were crushed by the betrayal of someone I had trusted. I trusted Lexa, and she took that deal. To top it off, the way she left was unnerving.
"May we meet again" I played it over and over again as I stared at the door in front of me. Cage was probably in there laughing at me. How he outsmarted me, and played my own alliance against me. I was a fool. Something was off with those last words. The way she spoke, it almost felt as if she was being forced. It crushed her to say them. I sat and stared at the bunker door, and looked around.
"Could she of not told me?!" I screamed. I was so angry, I staggered a couple steps and punched the steel bunker door that laid in front of me. It felt cold, and almost like it was seeping defeat, laughing at me.
"Clarke" A familiar voice came from behind me. I turned slowly to see who it was. Octavia Blake. Ofcourse she was here, her brother was inside, I thought. Her and I didn't agree on many things lately, but family is one thing you never abandon. These 44 had become our family. The 100 were our family.
"Where is Indra?" I said uneasy. It could be another trap, after all she was the grounders second. I looked at Octavia's neck and saw a cut similar to the one that Lexa had made on a grounder that defied her. Still, I didn't trust her. How could I when everything I knew was broken?
"She's gone Clarke, I am no longer her second. I am no longer anything but a Blake. You can trust me." her voice broke. "I-I-i am going to help us get into the bunker, I have a plan" She looked at me with hope, and confidence. If there was one thing we both agreed on in this moment, is that revenge was going to be on us. I took a step towards her and heard rustling in the bushes beside us. I cocked my head to the left and Octavia looked at me oddly.
Did she not hear that? I thought. I decided to ignore it, and began to walk towards her to hug her, and we both froze.
"Clarke, did you hear that?" Octavia said with slight panic. Over her shoulder I saw a familiar shadow emerge from the bushes.