It was a rainy day in Little Rock, Arkansas, school was still on, and it was the beginning of August, so school was about to begin. I walked around the corner of the first building I was supposed to enter; it was where my English classroom was. I just arrived from Puerto Rico, since my dad wanted me to get better grades and a school that could actually help me for my future career, which I still didn't know what it would be. I was lost, of course, but I still didn't want to lose my chances of feeling good and not falling into depression or wanted to skip school in the first day. Of course, I didn't knew anyone, or did want to, cause they all seemed so different from what I've known. We had to use uniforms in my school at Puerto Rico and we didn't here, girls didn't seem so crazy here, the guys were a little more stable and not stupid looking as my friends did, but still, there was something that made me feel normal, being alone. I arrived early that morning, so I could talk in the office and receive a map that could show me were to find my classes, but I still wanted to know better school, study every single place were I could linger with my loneliness and be, safe, I guess. My cell phone immediately rang, and by the ring tone, I knew it was my mother, she would be nervous and cranky though, which I actually didn't mind cause I would prefer her being away from me, we never had a good son-and-mother relationship. Unfortunately, I had to answer the phone or she would be pissing me off all the time, and people would continue to stare at me because of the hideous noise my phone was making. My mom sounded a little stressed out and sad, but still, that didn't stop her from yelling at me and reminding me that I could go back to Puerto Rico, which I totally disapproved and told her it would be better for me here, with my still unknown aunt which I was still trying to meet.
The
past few days I've been staying with my dad at my aunt's house,
but she wasn't there, apparently she was on a work vacation and was
going to return today, she would also pick me up after leaving my dad
in the airport, and of course, I didn't want to say good-bye, not
that I hated good-byes, but I hated my parents. My dad is a
hypocrite, and my mom, she was always approving my dad's desires,
and well, they always did what my little brother wanted, so it was
horrible living with them under the same roof, and now, a million
miles away from my house, I felt like in heaven. School was still a
little empty, I've been counting every single person I saw, trying
not to count them twice, and there were about fifty students, and
there were about three hundred students from all Little Rock,
everyone actually knew everyone, except me. So, finally, after a few
minutes, the bell rang, and I immediately ran to my first class,
English, just to take a good seat, away from the teacher so she
didn't notice me, even if she called my name. I entered the class
and placed a paper that the secretary gave me at the office so that
the teacher would sign it, maybe to know about my existence, and then
I would give it back at the end of the day. The English teacher was
named Miss Garner; I read it on a plaque that stood on her desk. She
would barely tell me something; she was too busy writing some papers,
so I would feel pretty free about this time. The classroom was almost
as big as my regular classrooms, of course, its interiors were
different, there were crystal windows and instead of the one-piece
desk I used to sit on at my school, there was actually a little desk
and a regular chair for each and every student.
"Take a seat
Hernandez, whichever you like." Miss Garner said, not with the
enthusiasm I expected, apparently the papers had more importance than
life itself that she barely noticed my movements around the room.
I
sat at the end of the room, just to be a little less unnoticeable,
but of course, every student that entered the classroom started at me
till they sat down just to turn around and look at me again. Surely
my aunt would have spread the word of my arrival, or maybe the
arrival of my dad to town would be the cause. My dad is known around
here because he owns a store were he sells parts for cars, actually
pretty boring, but the store was for the benefit for Little Rock,
apparently there wasn't any stores good enough as my dad's. Class
was about to begin, and I was ready for it to finish. Everyone was
still staring at me, or glancing over their shoulders just to not be
discovered by my sight, but it was obvious that everyone would be
watching after me all day long. I am totally not used to this kind
attention, people barely noticed me in my old school, and today
wouldn't be an exception, so I would just try to ignore them the
rest of the day. Next thing I know, there's a gut sitting next to
me, he seemed pretty normal, comparing with every single guy that was
glancing at me from time to time and then talk with whoever they were
talking; the guy besides me seemed pretty normal, not as snotty as
the others. He glanced at me once and smiled, like if he'd actually
didn't know about my existence, but then again, I was
wrong.
"You're Jorge Hernandez, aren't you?" He asked
freely, he didn't seem as shy as I did.
"Yeah, call me
Jorgito." I replied, shy, I barely knew what to say to him. He
offered me his hand politely and we shook hands.
"I'm Charles
Clinton. I've met you before." He turned aside to face me, I
tried to recognize from my memories, but I couldn't. I shook my
head in response and he chuckled a little. "We did, a few years
ago, we met at your dad's store, we used to play with the empty
boxes at the store and then your dad would yell at us all around."
I chuckled imagining how that scene would look if I'd actually
remembered, but still I didn't.
"Sorry man, still can't
recall you." I tried to give him a smirk, but it felt so totally
awkward that of all the people I knew, he was still untraceable in my
memories.
"Don't worry mate, someday you'll remember." He
panted once on my shoulder and sat straight on his chair, facing the
teacher that now stood in front of the desk, looking surprised and
careless.
"I guess it's your lucky day" —Miss Garner
mumbled under her breath, but still I could hear her- "I'll be
leaving now, something came up, so, you can leave and wait for your
next class." Ah, perfect words I'm used to, thank you miss
Garner. She looked at us, immediately each and every student stood
up, except me, and then started to leave the room. Charles looked at
me while he grabbed his backpack and then he glanced at the
door.
"You coming, mate?" Charles asked unwillingly, it seemed
he still wanted to speak of me, maybe something of matter. I stood up
and followed him outside, and we both stood besides the door of the
class. "Where to?"
I shrugged, I barely knew this guy, so
maybe I'd let him pick up a place to hang out with him. I followed
him again till we arrived to the lunchroom, I didn't have the time
to visit it before, and it looked totally different from what I
imagined. It was huge, painted in white with million of flyers pasted
on the walls, it had long big tables and it didn't look as boring
as I thought all lunchrooms were. The lunchroom wasn't nearly full,
but there were a lot of people there. I still hated knowing that
everyone was looking at me, I'll never get used to it, and I didn't
want to, either. Charles led me to the most inconvenient place to
seat, the middle of the lunchroom, which leaded me exactly to be the
center of attention, but I wouldn't complain about it, I wasn't
alone today. I sat down and Charles sat right in front of me, placing
his backpack over the table and his arms too.
"So, Jorgito, what
brings you to Little Rock after so many years?" Charles seemed
interested in my life, as all the others seemed to be. I couldn't
complain; I would have done the same if he were in my place.
"Well,
school, my dad wanted some better education for me, apparently Puerto
Rico isn't good enough for me." Charles chuckled as I sighted in
desperation. I was so annoyed remembering my parents, and what I now
I had to get used to, being the center of attention.
"Maybe your
dad wants what good for you, he's a wise man."
I was amused,
he knew nothing about my father and still he gave him the best
civilian award. It bothered me, of course, that he thought so well
about my father, the hypocrite, and still, it would be against their
beliefs if I didn't agree.
"Why don't you go live with him
in Puerto Rico, maybe join his one-minded-world?" Apparently my
sarcasm senses weren't working today. Charles looked at me, a
little worried, but still in thirst to know more.
"You don't
have a good relationship, with your dad, don't you?" I was about
to answer the question, but suddenly I sensed that this conversation
was over.
A girl, a total stranger, sat besides Charles, and
smiled at both of us, she seemed to be friends with Charles, or too
friendly. She had a wild dark curly hair, totally different to
Charles spiky brown hair. Her skin tone was almost looking like light
chocolate, she seemed pretty friendly ever though she scared the shit
out of me when she appeared out of nowhere.
"Little Jorge H,
long time and haven't heard of you till last week." She said, a
little enthusiastic, and I believe the word enthusiastic still fits
short for what she seemed to be. I did recognize her face, I did met
her, I believe, the last time I came here, about five or six years
ago. Maybe I just remember her face from Puerto Rico, or the times I
went to Florida, I still don't know. Most of the people that had
worked in dad's store in Florida now lived here, and still worked
at dad's shop, so maybe that was the reason I recognized her. She
chuckled while she noticed a little smirk in my face, and still I
struggled to remember from where I had met her.
"I'm Charlie's
little cousin, remember me?" Her face turned serious; apparently
knowing me was important.
The word cousin reminded me of both
Charles and her self. We all did pass some of our childhood together,
when I spent my summer vacations on Little Rock.
"I'm
Karolyn." She deliberately said her name, and I smiled.
"I do
remember you guys. You just look so different from what I remember."
At least, I didn't seem to be so lonely as I expected to
be.
Karolyn and Charles, my friends of summer childhood,
brilliant. At the moment I wondered if, after all these years, our
relationship could turn out well. I barely stood the necessity to
speak, I had no idea on what to say, I couldn't remember our
childhood conversations or remember more than playful times, so I
doubted in my being on ho to be social with these two old
friends.
"So, how does Puerto Rico look like, Jorgito?"
Karolyn asked eventually.
I couldn't deny myself it actually
felt good to be the center of attention between people I felt
comfortable with.
"Well, it's equally as boring as Little
Rock." I replied without consideration, and after rethinking about
my words, I flushed in my own madness, ho inconsiderate of
me.
Charles and Karolyn's faces didn't seem to change, or my
words didn't seem to bother them.
"You didn't say that when
you were little!" Karolyn chuckled after this; she seemed pretty
careless at the fact that Little Rock was actually boring.
"Well,
it is boring, but if you'd lived here since birth you can get used
to it." Charles replied in defense, I couldn't believe that some
could actually like this dead-looking place.
A few days ago I went
outside, my aunt's house is placed almost at the entrance of the
mall in the middle of Little Rock, and there wasn't much movement
around there, except from some seniors about to play bingo in the
mall. Dad promised and swore there were teenage movements around
there, but as always; it was just another fake statement so I'd
actually stayed. I studied Karolyn's face, she was a pretty girl, I
analyzed every single feature of her and I understood that maybe,
someday, I could date her. Then I realized that she wasn't in my
English class, so there was no way she was free at the time, and she
was a year younger than Charles.
"Aren't you supposed to be in
class?" I curiosity was getting unbearable, not following the rules
sometimes made me nervous, especially if I wasn't involved, at
all.
Karolyn just laughed at my question and then looked at me a
little surprised, with an expression that made me feel stupid and
worthless.
"I thought you said Little Rock was boring. I decided
to ditch class, it's the first day." Her tone seemed playful, and
I noticed that she thought the same thing as I did; we were both
getting along great. I laughed also after seeing Charles' face; he
didn't like the idea that his little cousin was now taking to
conversation to a whole different direction. We kept talking the
whole hour without ever realizing the bell had rang a few minutes
earlier till I realized the lunchroom was empty.
"Holly cow, I'm
late!" I yelled, and I believe the other two thought I was over
exaggerating about the being late thing. I stood up immediately
searching over the table for my backpack till I realized it was still
in my back. I grabbed my map and started running, and as I ran out of
the lunchroom I heard Karolyn's tender voice yelling good-bye at
me.
I arrived to class, the teacher looked at me, annoyed, I'd
eventually found it that as equally to me, it was rude being late. I
gave him the paper he needed to sign and he glanced at me while he
signed.
"Why don't you go take seat, mister Hernandez?" I
was nervous, of course, his voice was trembling in my ears; he was
being exaggerated of my lateness. I grabbed the paper I gave him and
looked around the room. Unfortunately, everyone stared at me also,
just like in the first class and whispered at each other's ears
stuff that I merely cared about.
This was the chemistry class, and
instead of the one-man-desks there were desk for up to two people,
which was now being practiced. All the seats occupied, except one
desk, just in the corner of the room, with a girl that seemed to be
out of space, thinking in other things, and I didn't wanted her to
be disturbed. I sat right besides her, and apparently, she didn't
notice me, she never turned her head to see me, and it was good,
cause I didn't need more attention from what I was already
receiving. I realized, after a few minutes, that the girl besides me
was extremely beautiful, and most of the students that were in the
classroom had already seen me, so maybe the fact that I was Jorge
Hernandez wasn't the cause of the attention now, maybe it was me
besides her, the lonely one here, as it seemed.
I stared at her, and after a few seconds her cold eyes blended into mine, I couldn't stop staring at her beautiful eyes, there were as normal as possible, but they were piercing and unpleasantly wonderful to look at. They had a green tone, but still looked like green forest and the orange tone of a sunset. She looked at me, scared, and I wondered if I'd actually seen her before, or if my father did something before I did. Her hands gripped over the metal tubes that sustained the seat of her chair, she get a little farther from me, maintaining her distance and turned her sight away, without letting go of the chair. The veins on her forearms seemed to turn purple, and I panicked, how could a girl turn like this just because of my look. She seemed disturbed, and I couldn't still think why. I tried to forget about her, and adjust to the class I nearly missed. It was my first day and I really didn't want to miss any important details. Dizziness was taking over my head, I could hear whispers around me when it was tenderly quiet, no one moved, but I could still hear people that, invincible people, I guessed. Yesterday night I saw a ghost movie, I was extremely bored and I could hear my dad's voice in the other room laughing and joking with someone in his cell phone. I could still feel her amazing presence absorbing my thoughts. I couldn't possibly keep my mind straight. When I looked at my side to finally face her, she was gone. I couldn't believe that her presence stole part of my heart, in just a few seconds, and now, when she disappeared, I felt barely alive. I searched her around the room till I saw her walk out of the door.