The breeze is cooling me as I'm on the balcony of this hotel room. Like every other night that we are on tour, I find myself out in the night, wondering.

I take a look inside, and there she is. There are no words to describe her beauty. No words to describe how much I envy the moon as her light, kissing her skin. She seems so fragile, like porcelain. I look at her chest, rising and falling gently. Sometimes she wrinkles her nose, melting my heart.

I exhale in the breeze, hoping it could take my desperation away. I'm eager to touch her, to feel her skin under my fingertips, to feel her muscles tense under my touch. I want to hear my name falling from her lips in ecstasy. I want her to be mine, in every possible way.

I look at the moon, 'cause I can't look at her any longer if I don't want my desires to get the best of me. But she's calling me. She shifts in her bed, a moan escapes her, and I turn to see the sheets falling and revealing her body. She's so pale under this light, and I just want to cry. And I do.

The night steals the silent cry from my lips as her beauty takes my breath away.

I open the door and go back inside to sit near her, on her bed. She's fallen asleep in her sports bra, so now here she is with the cold air of the night caressing her skin, causing goosebumps. I take the sheets and cover her again, my hands touching her in the process, sending shocks to my heart.

I stand from her bed, and with a trembling hand tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. I smile at the gesture. Her hair is so rebellious my attempt is vain and silly, I know I just needed to touch her.

And now I feel the need to kiss her, and so I do, I kiss her cheek.

I look at her for a long moment. She's unaware of my loving look, unaware of my struggling thoughts, unaware of how this closeness it's hurting me. But it's the only thing I can't live without. My love, my Tegan.

I look at the clock on the nightstand and a bittersweet smile spreads on my face. It's so strange to think that I let myself show my love for her only at this time of the day.

Now.

At Midnight.